Disclaimer:I do not own twilight or anyof the characters :D :D :D
BPOV
"That was all well and good, but we still have like an hour left until we can start getting ready." Alice moaned as soon as we walked through the door.
"You are seriously planning to start getting ready to go to the cinema where you will be sat in the dark for about an hour and a half and no one will even see you at half past five? We won't set off until at least seven o'clock." Jasper questioned.
"Listen, emo kid, when you look like you have just swallowed a planet and feel like you have just swallowed a planet, it kinda takes a little longer to make yourself feel pretty again." Rose stormed into the other room.
"Baby, I think you look pretty." Emmett ran after her.
"Hey, no one likes a kiss-ass" She called back, and we all spluttered with laughter.
"Okay, so that's settled then. Everyone who 'swallowed a planet' needs extra time to get ready. But what can we do now?" Jasper said mimicking Rosalie's voice almost perfectly.
"Well, I don't know what anyone else is doing, but I'm starving so I'm gonna go get food." I announced, standing up.
"We could go to Wal-Mart again? There's always something to do there." Alice grinned.
Before I knew it we were all piling into the cars again and speeding off to Wal-Mart to cause some serious trouble.
After all the trouble we got up to last time in this shop, I was surprised that we weren't carted away by security as soon as we set foot in the door. Emmett dashed off claiming that he had something to do. We just let him go, it would be less hassle for us.
"What do you want to eat love? It was what we came here for after all." Edward took my hand and smiled at me.
"Oh please. Would you like get a room already?" Rose stormed past. I guess she still wasn't over the whole 'fat' thing. I giggled and turned back to Edward.
"Can we just get some ice-cream? Lots and lots of ice-cream." I smiled sweetly. He just chuckled and put his arm around my shoulder.
"Of course, whatever you want." Edward kissed my forehead as we walked off. As soon as we were about to turn down the ice-cream aisle, Emmett came skidding up to us.
"Come...see...what...I...did!" Emmett put his hands on his knees and panted.
"Why are you panting? I know damn well that your not short of breath." I sighed.
"I know," he grinned, "but it makes it seem more important. Come see now." Emmett grabbed my hand and dragged me away from Edward.
"I thought I told you to not hold my hand again. What's so important I had to drop everything and come to see?" I wiped my hands on the blue cardigan I was still wearing. I looked around me to see what I was supposed to be so impressed by. "Oh my ..." I couldn't finish my sentence because of the laughter that was exploding from my mouth. I literally couldn't stop if I tried. Edward jogged around the corner just in time to see me gasp for breath. He took one look at the shelves around us and put his head I his hands.
"What have you done?" Edward asked whilst I was still practically rolling around. Emmett flashed a mischievous grin and turned around to survey his work. We were stood in the stationary aisle where every single calculator that was in stock was put on display upside-down, and each and every single one had the number 5318008 written on the screen. "Very mature, you're about to become a father for God's sake and you have spelt 'boobies' on every calculator in sight. I can honestly say hands down that this is the stupidest thing you have ever done. And what exactly are you both laughing so hard at?" Edward faced us with a stern look on his face. Both Emmett and myself were doubled over laughing.
"Boobies!" I managed to choke out in between laughing and gasping for air.
"What's so funny?" Rosalie, Alice and Jasper walked casually around the corner.
"Edward just said boobies." Emmett briefly stopped laughing to speak.
"I don't see why it's so funny that I said boobies." Edward looked puzzled. Jasper and Alice collapsed against each other and started howling with laughter. Rose let a single giggle escape her lips before she gained composure. "What? I only said boobies, it's really not that funny, boobies aren't that funny! STOP LAUGHING!" I could tell Edward was getting annoyed but every time he said it it only sent the rest of us back into hysterics. After another thirty seconds of waiting for us to stop he sighed and walked away. Even then, when I knew I should be going after him, I couldn't bring myself to stop laughing. I eventually stopped the giggles, no thanks to Emmett who kept mimicking Edwards voice. I smoothed down my white skirt and went in search of my boyfriend. It took a while but I eventually I found him examining the ice-cream selection. I walked up to him and threw my arms around him from behind.
"Hey, what was that for?" Edward smiled and hugged me tightly back. I told him I felt really bad about laughing before, I almost relapsed for a second and started laughing again but I managed to control myself. "It's okay, I guess it was kind of funny." Edward said although I totally knew he didn't think so. "Have you decided what ice-cream you want yet? You've had enough time."
I turned back to him, "Errrrm … this one." I reached into the freezer (with major difficulty thanks to my bump) and pulled out a big tub of chocolate ice-cream. Edward took it out of my hands for me and carried it to the check out. As soon as we had put the tub on the conveyer-belt, Emmett bounded up to us, once again.
"Come and see." He said, exactly the same as before.
"What is it this time? Have you written swear words on the walls in permanent marker?" I guessed halfheartedly, plonking the ice-cream back into Edwards arms.
"I haven't, but that's a really cool idea. It's hard to explain, just follow me." Emmett motioned for us to follow him. I sighed and waddled after him with Edward at my heels. We walked over to where Rosalie and Alice were looking at shoes. Surprise, surprise! The thing that Emmett wanted us to see was that Rose and Alice were fighting over a pair of shoes. Again, surprise, surprise. I had seen them do this a million times before but this time they were humongously pregnant. It was actually quite entertaining to watch, they were really going at each other. A crowd had gathered, with the chaos being filmed on mobile phones – I must remember to look it up on YouTube later. There was screaming, shouting, hair pulling and I swore I heard growling from one of them. I decided to intervene before things got nasty.
"ROSALIE CULLEN AND ALICE CULLEN STOP THIS NONSENSE IMMEDIETLY!" I stormed over there with my hands on my hips. They stopped what they were doing and hid the shoes behind their backs, one shoe each. "What do you think you're doing? Fighting over a pair of shoes, again! Honestly, are they really worth it?" I asked in my I-ain't-taking-no-crap voice.
"We weren't fighting over shoes Bella, really." Alice said, her voice as sweet as sugar.
"Oh no? Then what's behind your backs?" I demanded, folding my arms across my chest.
"Errrm … errrm … it's a surprise, for you." Rosalie stuttered. I sighed and stared at each one in turn.
"Do you think I was born yesterday?" I asked, using my most serious face.
"Practically." Rose sniggered, making Alice giggle. But I was not amused.
"That's enough cheek from you two. Hand me the shoes then go and wait by the car. I swear down now, if I have to shout at you again then you can't go out to the cinema's tonight." I stuck my hands out, waiting for the shoes to appear from behind their backs. There was grumbling and what I thought was a few mumbled curses, but they handed them to me all the same. I slammed the shoes back on the shelf and turned around to face applause. To be honest, I wasn't in the mood, so I said a quiet thank-you, then grabbed Edward – who was still holding my ice-cream – and dragged him back to the checkout.
Because of the 'fight' that occurred before, the queue's were now really long. I groaned and burried my head into Edwards cold shoulder. He chuckled and and held me close as we edged closer to being served.
By the time we were at the till it was ten minutes later and I was really cranky. My feet hurt, my back hurt and I really needed to pee. The guy serving us was old and fat and looked scarily similar to Santa. He seemed way to happy, I decided I didn't like him.
"Hi there, how are you today?" I frowned and answered as honestly as I could.
"I feel like crap thanks, how are you?"
"I'm good thanks." I don't think he quite knew what to make of my answer. "Oh congratulations! When are you due?" Santa asked as he beeped my ice-cream through and rang up the price.
"Hopefully soon, as in tomorrow soon." I answered, shoving the tub into a plastic carrier bag.
"You've had enough then?" I nodded politely, but really I wished that he would just can it. "My wife was the same with our first, she said that if it didn't come out soon then she'd drag it out herself." He chuckled at the memory and took the ten dollar bill out of Edwards hand. "But by the fifth she kind of kind used to it." Holy moley! He had five kids?
"I don't quite think we're ready for five yet." Edward smiled and took his change.
"Quite right! Well have a good day and good luck for the future." Santa smiled cheerily and waved us off. After all of that, I think I like him after all!
When we got back to the house, I ran straight to get a spoon. It had been staring at me the whole way home and now, I was gonna eat that damn ice-cream! I sat at the table eating it big spoonfuls at a time until Alice and Rose slunk by, arm in arm and giving me evil looks. I pointed the spoon at them as a warning before continuing to gorge myself on chocolatey goodness. With Edward dropping some subtle hints, I went to go and make up with Rose and Alice. They were sat in the lounge flipping aimlessly through the TV channels. I plonked myself down next to them. I just watched for a few minutes before turning towards them both and apologized. They just grinned at each other crazily before diving on me and dragging me upstairs.
"It's okay," Alice laughed, "We forgive you. Besides, now it's time for dressing up!" They both cheered as I screamed for help. All that happened as a result was I was gagged by a scarf and held tighter than before. Oh the joys of vampire strength!
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