fragmentation;
02.
Shindou comes over the next week. Akira is there to open the door when the familiar tapping noise sounds, and he finds Shindou standing awkwardly on his doorstep, a small fruit basket in his hand.
"Hey," Shindou says. His gaze wanders.
"Hey," Akira says back. His voice is raspy, and he clears his throat. "Hey," he tries again, sounding too normal. He holds the door open wider. Shindou steps in gratefully and presses the handle of the basket into Akira's hand.
"Here," he says, fumbling with his fingers. "I brought... this. I hoped..." he trails off awkwardly.
Akira smiles wryly. Shindou's trying, he can tell. That's enough for him.
"Want to play a game?"
Shindou looks up, slightly startled. "I, uh, your mom—"
"She won't mind," Akira promises. "Mother isn't home right now. She'll be back in a few hours, but she's familiar with you."
"Oh," Shindou says. "Okay." He pauses. "I—I know how it feels, Touya."
Akira doesn't understand. "Feel?" he repeats.
"To... lose someone. Something. Something important."
"You do?"
Shindou looks at him, and Akira is surprised by the seriousness he sees in his eyes. "I do," he says again. "I know."
Akira stares back at him for a long time and chuckles bitterly, walking into the living room. Shindou follows him, his steps slow and hesitant behind him. Akira takes his father's goban out and sets it in front of him, running three fingers across its smooth surface.
Shindou crouches down next to him. "Touya," he tries to say again.
"I don't know, Shindou," Akira interrupts him. "You might know, but I don't. I haven't lost anything. Not yet." His voice cracks towards the end of his sentence and he covers his mouth, half-trembling, half-embarrassed. "I'm sorry," he stammers, "I—"
"Touya."
Shindou's voice is calm, soothing, firm. Akira feels battered, shaken, and broken. And that's probably why, when Akira falls, when Akira collapses all together, loses all of what's left to put him together, crumples into a ball like a lost child, Shindou is right there, a sturdy arm around his shoulders and a low voice to tell him that everything will be all right, and that Shindou will be there, until Akira is ready to come back.
to be continued.