A/N: :D IM BAAAAAAAACK BABY! Sorry it took me so long to do this! But the good news is I have a secret admirer! EXCITEMENT! Anywho….that last chapter wasn't funny….sorry Ayame, but it wasn't! It gave poor Ciel nightmares. But this one will!
Disclaimer: I totally own it! That is, when I dream. I also dream of the Mad Hatter and Batman!
That butler is a disgrace! His wandering hands should be tied up! And while he's tied up, push him into a lake. He gave me moonshine. I know what moonshine is. I mean, come on. I have a whore of an aunt, acquaintances with an opium seller and have an ex-sailor living with me. I know what the drink looks/smells like.
That silly butler thought I was drunk. Nope. I was loopy because that meat he made? It wasn't even cooked all the way! I'm going to die from some type of food poisoning! Devil hath mercy on thy soul, huh? So this is how the attempted rape went:
Sebastian: "Hello my drunken love-I mean Bocchan! Lets embrace without clothes on!"
Me: "Wha-what? NO! you are sick! Sick, sick, sick demon! You're acting like Grell!"
Sebastian: "You mean…you are not drunk?"
Me: "No! …Where are you trying to touch me, you ingrate?"
Sebastian: "NOWHERE! I…have to clean the gerbils-I mean Alois' cage! Good bye!
Me: "Yeah, you better run. Ain't no one touching this hot stud, biatches!" *gestures at body*
Sebastian: "All in good time, Bocchan! Oh. And if there is any white substance on your bed, do not mind. I was merely looking at a picture of you. Toodles, love~!
A/N: Merry Christmas everyone! (or whatever the hell you celebrate!)
What sucks though, is that I HATE Christmas! bahumbug!