Disclaimer: I own nothing!
Author's Note: Once again, I haven't updated in forever! I'm sorry!
So, this is the final reason and there will be an epilogue after this. I would love to make it to 200 reviews, so I need 28 more. Can we do it? And who's excited for Glee tonight?
Reason Thirteen
The last DVD. This was the last one. After this, they'd have to send the DVD's onto the next person, and they'd never hear Rachel's voice, never see her face, ever again. After this last reason, she'd be gone forever.
They almost didn't want to play it, because they knew after the final DVD it would be over. But, curiosity got the best of the New Directions. Who did Rachel want to take these DVD's to Hell?
A few people gasped as the picture appeared on the screen. Rachel was standing in the school, and they could tell from what she wore and the date on the bottom of the screen, that this DVD had been filmed just the day Rachel killed herself. Yesterday.
This is it. I am going to try one last time, to get a hold of myself. I'm going to the most honest, blunt, tell-it-like-it-is person in this school. I know this person doesn't like me much, but I know they'll tell me what they think. If they stop me, try to help me in any way, I won't kill myself. If they don't, tonight I will overdose on painkillers. If you're watching this, it means they've failed me. Here I go.
Rachel opened up and her backpack and reached for the video camera, stuffing it inside. The screen went black and the sound of Rachel zipping in the backpack closed could be heard. Everyone was silent and you could hear someone opening a door and the sound of footsteps. Then silence.
"What do you want glee club girl whose name I can't remember?"
Oh God. Sue. It was Sue.
"Hello Miss Sylvester. And for your information, my name's Rachel. Rachel Berry."
Rachel paused.
"I just needed someone to talk to. And you're the most honest, frank person I know."
"Why thank you. Now, what is it and speak quickly because so far I've found this conversation a complete waste of my time."
"I've just been…not myself lately."
"I have noticed this school has gotten a little less annoying. But please, go on."
"I feel like I just want everything and everyone to stop…school, family, friends, Glee, life…"
"Rachel, is it? Did you just say life?"
"Yes I did, Miss Sylvester."
"That's very serious, Barbra Streisand wannabe. I frown upon people who take their own lives. It means they have no drive to live."
"That's just it, Miss Sylvester. My drive is gone."
"Well, how can we get it back?"
"That's it, we can't."
A laugh.
"Then why don't you just give up?"
A pause.
"I should."
There was the sound of a chair squeaking across the floor, the camera shook as if the backpack was moving.
"Where are you going, Will Schuester's annoying glee club star?"
"I think I've made up my mind. Thank you for your time."
"Rachel-"
A door opening and closing. Sue's voice calling for Rachel in the background. Then the sound of feet, feet running, heavy breathing, a zipper. Rachel picked up the camera and pointed it back up at her face.
That's it. She's letting me go.
I think I've made myself clear, I think I've let it be known that I don't want to live. But no one stopped me. I know some of you did care, but you just didn't care enough. That's what I needed to find out. And I did.
And I'm sorry.
The screen goes black, and for a moment everyone thinks that's it, until they hear a sound. A voice lifting up in the blackness, rising and rising. Rachel's voice. Her last song.
It won't be easy, you'll think it strange
When I try to explain how I feel
That I still need your love after all that I've done
You won't believe me, all you will see is a girl you once knew
Although she's dressed up to the nines
At sixes and sevens with you
I had to let it happen, I had to change
Couldn't stay all my life down at heel
Looking out of the window, staying out of the sun
So I chose freedom, running around trying everything new
But nothing impressed me at all
I never expected it to
Don't cry for me, Argentina
The truth is I never left you
All through my wild days
My mad existence
I kept my promise, don't keep your distance
And as for fortune, and as for fame
I never invited them in
Though it seemed to the world they were all I desired
They are illusions, they're not the solutions they promised to be
The answer was here all the time
I love you, and hope you love me
Don't cry for me, Argentina
Don't cry for me, Argentina
The truth is I never left you
All through my wild days
My mad existence
I kept my promise, don't keep your distance
Have I said too much?
There's nothing more I can think of to say to you.
But all you have to do is look at me to know that every word is true.
And then it really, truly, is over.