Disclaimer: I don't own Marvel. Obviously.
Claimer: I own Evyn Dolrson. Clearly.
In half of this chapter, Loki is non-binary and uses "ze/zim/zir" pronouns.
When Evyn walked out the door, Thor stood, hands clenched at his sides. "Is he alright?" He asked. Evyn smiled at him.
"A bit better, I think," he replied. "You may go in if you like. He needs to get cleaned up a bit, but if he asks you to leave that to him, be respectful of that."
Thor nodded and walked past the healer, shutting the door behind him. The lights were still on, though dimmer than they had been in the other room. He let his eyes adjust before walking over to where Loki was sitting on the bed, his back to Thor.
"Loki?" Thor said, kneeling in front of Loki, placing a hand on his knee. "Loki, are you alright?"
He looked like he'd crawled out of hell. His hair was tangled and his eyes were red-rimmed and puffy, like he'd been crying. He was pale and he looked thin. He was thin, Thor realized, noticing how Loki's tunic seemed to hang off of his frame. When was the last time he sat down to eat a full meal? He wondered.
"I'm okay," Loki whispered in reply. Thor blinked and nodded.
"Alright," he said.
"I am," Loki insisted. "I'm—" He stopped and searched Thor's face. Thor let him, not saying anything. "You don't believe me," he said at last.
"No," Thor replied. "I do not."
Loki nodded, looking at his hands. "Good," he said, almost too softly for Thor to hear. "I don't want you to."
Thor swallowed. "Let's get you cleaned up," he said. "Would you like help?" Loki chewed on his cheek for a minute before giving a single nod, eyes still averted. "That's okay," Thor said in reply, standing and taking Loki's hands. "Come on."
And so Thor washed him. It wasn't the first time he had done so; he had often been given the task of making sure his younger brother got clean when they were children. On the rare occasion Loki got drunk, he sometimes needed assistance.
Loki kept his eyes averted the entire time. When Thor finished and got clean sleepwear, Loki dressed himself and let Thor lead him back to bed. "Would you like me to stay?" Thor asked, stroking Loki's damp hair away from his face. Loki nodded again and Thor pressed a kiss to his forehead. "That's okay," he said and went to the other side of the bed. Loki picked up a little vial on the beside table and opened it, tipping the content into his mouth. He then close the vial and put it back, laying down and facing away from Thor.
"Good night, Loki," Thor murmured, scooting closer to put an arm around his brother.
"... Good night, Thor."
Evyn walked into his office, Odin and Frigga following. He waved for them to sit as he poured out a few cups of water, placing two on the table before sitting across, running his fingers through his hair and taking a sip.
"Frist of all," the healer said, "I gave Loki a medication. It should kick in... I think in about two days. So he may not wish to get up tomorrow. That's fine," he added, looking up to reassure Frigga and Odin. "Bad days are just a part of recovery. But the medication will help cut that down and work on his anxiety as well."
"Do you know what triggered this?" Frigga asked, her water untouched. "Was it the marketplace?"
"That is a probability, yes," Evyn said, nodding, sipping.
"Is he in danger of hurting himself?" Odin asked. His eye was narrowed and his face stony. Evyn hesitated, giving it some thought.
"I don't think he is in any immediate danger, no," he replied. "I'm glad Thor went to him. I gave Loki a sleeping potion to take tonight so he can get a good night's rest. He knows to take the medication in the morning, but there are instructions on the bottle as well."
Frigga nodded and Odin sat next to her. "Will he be okay?" Frigga asked, voice soft.
Evyn sighed. "If he stays on track with sessions and takes the medication, yes," he said. "But I wanted to tyalk about the conditions of his... 'healing process,' as you call it."
"What about it?" Odin said, eye narrowing.
"You have him eating dinner with everyone every evening, yes?"
"Yes, we do," Frigga confirmed.
"I think that needs to change, if only slightly," Evyn replied. "Loki needs to feel like he has time to himself in the evenings without having stress about what may happen if he doesn't turn up. I believe he has been willing to show up so far, yes?"
"Every evening except tonight," Frigga said, nodding.
"That's good," Evyn nodded. "But though it may be inevitable, I want to avoid a relapse of this. He needs to feel like he has choices, like he's not being trapped in a corner."
Odin clenched his jaw briefly. "What do you suggest?" He asked.
"He has to eat everyday," Evyn said. "He may not want to eat a full meal, but so long as he eats something, even if it's nothing especially healthy, he'll be okay. I've had patients live on snack food for a month because they didn't feel like eating. Other than that, I suggest you speak to him about what might work."
"Will he do that?" Odin asked, sounding skeptical.
"Perhaps, perhaps not" Evyn said with a shrug. "But communication is key. Once he's recovered from this episode, sit down with him and talk. Work things out, make a compromise that everyone agrees with." Evyn refilled their water glasses and said "You care about Loki. I understand that. But let him know that you care about him and listen to what he has to say." He sat back and added "I would also suggest offering sessions to Thor."
Both parents looked surprised by this. "Thor?" Frigga said. "Why?"
"He's young," Evyn replied. "And he cares about Loki as well. He doesn't seem to understand what's going on and that's likely to be frustrating, especially since he is unable to speak to anyone without accidentally spreading rumors about Loki's condition."
"He can speak to us," Frigga said. Evyn raised an eyebrow at her.
"I'm sure if you offered, he would," Evyn agreed. "However, it is different speaking to your parent about your worries than it is speaking to a stranger. I myself would take Thor on as a patient, however, I make it a rule not to see people within the same family. However, I have a close friend and colleague of mine who I'm sure would be delighted to take his case."
"And who is this... colleague?" Odin asked.
"Winnfrid Thrithdottir," Evyn replied. "We went to school together. She's æs, but received nearly all of her education in Alfheim. Healer Eir is familiar with her, I think." He shrugged. "She is very well educated in her field and has worked with warriors of all sorts before. She likes to travel around. I can write her tonight and ask her to come, if you would like to meet her."
Frigga and Odin looked at each other, a silent conversation commencing between them. Evyn watched in bemusement when Odin said "We'll have to think about it," at the same moment Frigga said "We would appreciate it, thank you."
Evyn looked between the two and smiled. "Why don't you two talk about it and get back to me in a week or so? In the meantime, I'll contact Winnfrid and see if she's interested in the case."
Odin looked at Frigga, whose eyebrows were raised. He sighed and turned back to Evyn. "That would be acceptable. Thank you, Healer Evyn."
"You're quite welcome," Evyn said and stood. "Now if you two don't mind, it is getting late, and I would like to get a bit of sleep."
Loki woke up feeling disoriented. Light was spilling from the open curtains and someone had opened a window.
Sighing, Loki rolled over, curling up and pulling up the blankets. This is going to be a bad day.
"Loki? Brother, are you awake?"
Loki remained silent, realizing what the matter was. Loki was... Hm. Well, I'm not a man.
"Loki?" Thor walked over, sitting on the edge of the bed, and Loki felt a large hand on zir shoulder. Ze whined and scooted away. "There's a bottle on your bedside table," Thor continued. "It says to take a capful in the morning."
Shit. Ze had forgotten. Sighing, ze sat up and squinted zir eyes against the sunlight. "Lemme see," ze said and Thor handed the bottle over.
Instructions:
Pour capful into cup of water and mix before ingesting.
Dosage:
Once a day on an empty stomach.
Well, at least it didn't say what it was for. Thor had gotten a glass of water for zim already, so Loki took it and mixed it, gulping it down. It didn't taste very good, but at least it wasn't the worst medication ze'd ever had to take.
"What is that?" Thor asked, frowning as he looked at the bottle.
"Medication," Loki replied, laying down again.
"...For what?" Thor said, frown deepening. Loki realized he wasn't going to go away, so instead ze got up, heading into the bathroom to avoid answering. Ze wasn't even really sure what was wrong with zim at this point; ze only knew that something was.
Ze relieved zimself and washed zir hands, glancing in the mirror and pausing. Ze then grabbed a washcloth and towel and washed up, combing zir hair and pulling it into a ponytail at the base of zir neck, not wanting to bother with trying to style it. Ze then walked back out and saw Thor standing by the window, looking out.
"What are you doing today?" Thor asked, turning as Loki took out clean clothes. Loki shrugged, pulling zir shirt off. "You could spend the day with me," Thor suggested. "I'm not doing very much, but Father's asked me to sit in on the court today."
"No, thank you," Loki murmured. "I'll probably just do..." Ze made a vague gesture. "...things."
"What sort of things?" Thor asked, sitting on the bed and crossing his arms, an eyebrow raised. Loki shrugged.
"Interesting things," ze said. "Stuff."
"I see." Thor's lip twitched in amusement. "Would you like company while you do your 'things'?"
"No, thank you," Loki repeated. It was about then that there was a knock on the door. Thor answered it, Loki sitting down to lace up zir shoes.
"Mother!" Thor said. "Good morning."
"And so it is," Frigga said, smiling as she kissed Thor's cheek. "May I come in?" Thor turned.
"Loki, may Mother come in?" Loki nodded without looking up and Frigga entered, placing a hand on Loki's shoulder and kissing the top of zir head.
"How are you feeling, my daring?" She asked. "Have you eaten anything yet?"
"Fine," Loki replied, standing. Ze wondered why everyone was so damn interested in his eating habits. "I'm going to the gardens."
"Your father and I would like a word first," she said.
He's not my father. Loki bit the words back and swallowed them. "Fine," ze repeated and followed her out, Thor following.
"Thor, we'd like to speak with you a little later as well," she said, placing her hand back on Loki's shoulder. "We'll send for you."
"Yes, Mother," Thor said, and glanced at Loki as he walked away.
Notes:
Thank you to everyone who reviewed last chapter! I was kinda hesitant about it (and really the whole story) because I wanted to portray depression accurately, so special thank you to Annon(Guest) for telling me that you connect with this. It really put my mind at rest.
On another note, I'm glad to say there is still tons more to come! I have no idea how long this'll be, but I have eight or nine more chapters written and I don't see an end in sight. Unfortunately, school has taken its toll; I'm not writing as much as I would like, but I've got an outline for the plot running through my head.
If you are confused as to the ze/zim/zir pronouns, please see the author's notes at the end of the first chapter.