The atmosphere was heavy – the room vibrated with tension and all they could do was to stare at the cause of their problems. The suite they were staying in was rather big, mostly because Viktor wouldn't have it any other way and Yuuri suddenly felt small and scared, unsure of how he was supposed to act. The truth was that he was deadly curious about what happened to that little girl but they also didn't properly talk about the situation, the only thing they were sure about was the fact that they both felt something for her, something crazily strong for a first meeting. So now they were stuck, the file dominating the surroundings while they were curled on the sofa, their limbs tangling.

"I will open it" Viktor finally concluded and grabbed the yellowish envelope from the coffee table v where their two cups of tea were placed. Yuuri tensed, his entire body going rigid when the papers were brought to the light and he could see a few pictures of Lola, a numb expression on her lovely face. She was very beautiful, nevermind the circumstances but it was painful to see a toddler so serious. "Do you want me to read it out loud?"

"Please" The younger man whispered and leaned so he could see the words himself.

"Born in Lakewood, California on 12th April, age: 3 years old" His voice was unsure, partly because English was not his favourite language and partly because he was nervous. "Taken by the Child Protection Services on 28th December 2016" They took turns in reading because at one point it was too much for Viktor to handle.

The file spilled every drop of information – the girl's father was unknown, she has been living with her mother and her many abusive lovers that sometimes let go of their anger on her. The CPS tried various times to take the child but it only became possible when they found illegal substances in the apartment after some neighbours complained about the girl crying a couple of days in a row without stopping. When they took her in she was malnourished and terribly scared by all men who came near her. She expressly feared tall men with blue eyes because that fit the image of her mother's last man.

"That's why she was so afraid of me" Viktor said and Yuuri placed a hand on his when he saw how the man started to tremble. "This is horrible" The pictures were indeed terrible, the bruises on her body were not small but beyond that they were sure a greater trauma stood. "Who could do this to a child, Yuuri? She's not even four!" The anger was clear in his voice so the Japanese wrapped his arms around his shoulders and pulled him in a hug, kissing his forehead.

"They're not human" He assured and sighed. "I- Oh my God she must be so scared"

"She's only a baby!" Viktor's voice was bitter but even like that, he kept looking at the pictures of the small apartment she was found in, shocked that anyone could live like that. It was dirty and it seemed anything but child friendly.

"And they want to send her away"

Quietness followed – and it seemed like forever until one of them spoke.

"Not if we step in" Brown eyes widened at the words and the owner gasped because he wasn't expecting this. Of course they were interested because otherwise they wouldn't have taken the file but it was not that simple and raising a girl who was afraid of men and who seemed absolutely reluctant when it came to Viktor was almost unrealistic. "I- I felt something when I saw her with you, even when she started crying, all I could think about was how much I wanted to soothe her."

"We'll see her again tomorrow"

"Maybe we should take her somewhere, I am sure they will let us take her for the evening" Yuuri frowned.

"I think we should stay there tomorrow and see how she reacts and then think of more" Viktor nodded and finally put aside the papers, his arms immediately searching for his husband, whom they enveloped lovingly. He kissed his forehead and inhaled as if he just ran a marathon. "Maybe we can buy something for her tomorrow"

"Uh-uh" Another kiss followed, this one on the cheek. "You're so good with children, Yuu~ri. I love you so much"

A smile spread on the younger man's lips.

"I love you too, Vitya" He yawned and nuzzled the neck close to him. Cuddling always calmed him down so he felt his body relaxing, even if his mind was still running wild.

"Sleepy, zoloste?" The brunet nodded and yelped surprised when he was lifted in strong arms and was forced to wrap his arms around Viktor's neck, making sure he wouldn't lose his balance.

"Viktor! Put me down!" It was futile and only when they reached the bed was he released. The bed was soft and comfy so he gave up on complaining and felt gratitude towards his previous idea of dressing in pjs as soon as they got home. He was tired, he could still feel the tiredness caused by the flight and the emotional rollercoaster was too much for his poor body. He tried to keep his anxiety at a normal pace but it was near to impossible because they were gonna take one of the most important decisions of their lives.

He shut his eyes shut and didn't move when the mattress moved under him and a blanket covered him and he snuggled closer to the warm body beside him, burying his face in the strong chest covered by cotton.

"Sleep tight, love" The Russian whispered and was rewarded with a kiss on his neck that he knew it was meant to be a reply to his words. He was beyond tired but he fell asleep a lot later, when his husband's breathing became regular; he tried to concentrate on the soothing heartbeat close to his ear but all he could think about was how scared he was of what was going to follow – what if they weren't ready for this? What if he was going to be an awful father and an even worse role model for his child? What if...? What if...?

He couldn't stand it anymore so he sneaked out of the bed, trying his best to move smoothly because Viktor was a light sleeper, unlike himself who could barely be woken up in the morning. He searched through one of their bags for some pills he usually took for his anxiety and when he finally found them he went to fill a glass of water. His feet felt cold on the rug and he closed his eyes, trying to stay focused on something and not lose himself but it became harder and harder with each second, until it finally hit him like a train and he started shaking. Of course he would be anything but good as a father – he couldn't even take care of himself, let alone another human being, not to say a troubled child. He felt the walls closing on him and he grasped the sink with both hands, so tightly that his knuckles turned white and he realised he couldn't feel his lower lip.

"Yuuri?" A sleepy voice was all he needed to tense even further – now he troubled Viktor too. Even after all these years he couldn't accept the fact that someone would put with his "episodes" willingly, that he wasn't a nuisance. The older man realised immediately what was going on and hurried to wrap his arms around the trembling frame, pulling Yuuri's back to his front and leaning so he could whisper in his ear. "Focus on my voice, love" His hands slid down the other's arms until they reached the painful hold and did his best until he forced the fingers to unclasp from the cold surface and grab his instead. "You're fine, perfect even" His voice was calm and calculated – he did his best to learn how to act so he could help his lover and it was clear how seriously he took his job for he researched a lot. "I love you, solnyshko and we're both gonna be fine, I promise" He continued to whisper sweet words into his ear until he completely gave in, his breathing evening and his body falling on his like a rag doll. "That's it" He cooed and Yuuri used his last ounces of strength to turn around and try not to cry.

"V-Vitya"

"I know, I know" He assured and kissed his head. "It's okay, let's go to sleep or do you need some water?" The nod made him fill another glass and place it to his husband's lips, patiently waiting until he drained it. "Do you think you can sleep now or would you rather we do something else" By the way he hesitated the Russian already understood that he couldn't sleep so he slowly moved him towards their bed where they snuggled against the new-built pile of pillows. "TV?"

"Yes"

So he turned it on but he knew neither of them was paying any attention to the commercials playing, instead they were focusing one on another, on the way they smelled, on the warmth of their touch. They were a messy pair of tangled limbs when they fell asleep and they didn't bother to close the muted TV, the night too heavy on them. In the morning, Yuuri got up first and ordered some room service so when Viktor woke up he was lured by the amazing smell towards the little feast.

"Good morning, Vitya!"

"Morning, lyubov moya!" His voice was hoarse but he didn't hesitate to go closer and kiss his husband sweetly before he was offered a plate filled with waffles. "Thank you" He knew that after an anxiety attack he was supposed to be careful but it was obvious Yuuri was doing his best to surpass the moment so he didn't insist on it, promising to himself he was going to be a breath away if he was going to be needed. After all, he vowed he will be – for the rest of his life.

They decided to go shopping before heading towards the orphanage and ended up buying a lot more sweets than intended, not that it was a problem because there were a lot of children there. For Lola they ended up buying a stuffed and pale pink teddybear that was just the perfect size for her. She truly needed a lot more toys because the image of that empty bed broke their hearts whenever they thought about it. When they arrived they asked some people to come and help with the industrial quantities of sweets and were greeted right away by Miss Graham who seemed pleasantly surprised.

"Good evening!" They replied politely and were invited in the small office that now was familiar. "I see you're really settled on adopting"

"Of course – we would never joke around with something this important." Yuuri assured and Viktor nodded, their hands linked on his thigh.

"Have you read the file?"

"We did" The pale-haired man said and the woman's brows furrowed above her thick glasses.

"And changed your mind, I presume"

"You presume wrongly, then" Viktor answered curtly, feeling a little irritated that they were thought to be so superficial. He, from all the people out there, knew how it was to be an outcast as a child so there was no way he could give up so easily on his instinct and leave the girl behind. "Can her mother contact her?"

"Unfortunately, her mother was sent to a rehabilitation institute and we have no idea what happened to her but she gave no sign of wanting to reach the girl" So cruel – oh, did Viktor know the coldness of such a mother. These were the women who abandoned children without a second thought, children they didn't wish for in the first place.

"So there is no danger –" Yuuri started.

"Of course not, Mr. Katsuki-Nikiforov, she was absolved of any motherly rights, legal ones too"

"When can we see her?"

"Whenever you want to, there's no doubt" They decided they wanted right then so they took the route to the first floor and opened the door carefully after they've been warned by a 10-something year old girl that there were people sleeping in there. In fact, Lola was the only one sleeping and Yuuri squeezed his husband's hand tightly at the innocent sight as soon as they stepped closer. She was sleeping on her back, head to a side and her little fist close to her parted lips. Her tummy was rising and falling in time with her breathing and she looked absolutely adorable with her messy caramel hair falling all over. There were a few more girls playing quietly on the ground so they waved at them – of course she would nap at noon, she was a toddler after all.

"We should wait outside" Yuuri suggested, so they wouldn't wake her up but in less than 10 seconds she began to squirm and they ended up holding their breaths.

"She wakes up" Viktor chirped and Yuuri grinned at the panic but bent when he saw the little girl blinked her eyes opened and got up almost instantly, looking somewhat confused. He expected a worse reaction so he sat on the edge and ran his fingers through the sweaty curls.

"Wakey wakey, sleepy head" He whispered and she leaned into the touch without a sound.

"Did you have a nice nap, princess?" Viktor bent to look at her and her body tensed without reason, making both men sigh. "It's okay, I won't do anything to you" He promised and Yuuri grabbed his hand, knowing it was yearning for something to hold. Lola looked at the linked fingers a bit confused and then grabbed her used-up bunny. "We have a present for you"

They had the bear wrapped up just like a present so she looked at it with wide eyes.

"It's for you" Yuuri offered it to her and she took it, unsure of what she was supposed to do with it. "Do you want me to help?"She nodded so he tore the paper open before offering it to her. She picked it and smiled a bit as she hugged it to her chest and placed it on the pillow.

"Do you like it?"

"Yes" It was the first time she spoke and her voice sounded like ringing bells so they were taken aback a bit.

"We're happy, then. Do you want to take a walk with us?" She nodded and struggled to get off the bed after tugging at her pants. Her clothes, once again, were too large but she seemed to be used to them. They realised she had no idea when she was doing when she put on a sock inside out and grabbed the wrong shoe. "Wait, I will help you" Viktor whispered kindly and undressed the white foot so he could place the sock properly and then grabbed the shoe and made sure it was in place. The next one followed and as he did so, she clung to the brunet's arms tightly, as if she was expecting something bad at any time – but nothing happened and she found herself in the arms of her favourite of the two, because they weren't trusting her to climb down the stairs alone.

Once they reached the green yard they saw children were looking curiously at them so they waved and continued their walk.

"Do you like walks, Lo?" She nodded and the Japanese smiled, grabbing his husband's awaiting hand while the child walked in front of them. When she saw that she stopped, her brows furrowing as she pointed at their hold.

"Why?"

"Because we like to hold hands" By the look on her face, she wasn't satisfied with the explanation. "Because we love each other. I told you already Viktor is my husband, we're married" She nodded once and continued to walk but with less soaring. "Do you want to hold hands too?" Lola didn't say no, she just stopped and looked at her black shoes but when Yuuri got close to her she grabbed the large hand and held onto it tightly. She looked on the other side and saw Viktor's hand too but this one was even larger than the other so she hesitated before taking it.

"Isn't it nice?" He asked and she nodded, looking straight ahead. "Look, butterflies" He pointed towards a bush of flowers where a few small creatures were flying around and went closer when she began to tug in that direction. One of the butterflies approached them and sat on Viktor's green shirt, his wings moving lazily as Lola gasped and tugged on his hand to signal she wanted to see it better. Yuuri picked her up so she was offering a finger to the bug that flied away almost instantly and left her in tears.

"Oh, no, there's no need to cry, sweetheart" The younger man cooed as her bottom lip began to tremble.

"He was probably hurrying somewhere, let's find a new one" Viktor offered and ran his fingers through her tangled curls. She nodded, sniffling a bit and Yuuri kissed her head, making her freeze for a moment. Her hand reached the kissed place and she began to sob properly now.

"No, please don't cry, I'm sorry" He said hopelessly and she buried her face in his chest. "That's my way of telling you I like you a lot" He hesitated to use the world love, afraid she would get scared by it and she peeked up, looking at him. "Look, I kiss Viktor a lot because I love him" The taller man leaned so he could have his cheek kissed and the girl blinked, surprised. "See?"

"That means you're important to Yuuri" The Russian said and caressed her back gently. "Let's go find another butterfly, shall we?"

It was frightening how alien she was to all that affection meant but the walk was pleasant even if she didn't talk almost at all. Near dinner time they were asked if they wanted to stay or if they were heading back. At first, they didn't want to intrude but then they realised they could use the opportunity and see how she was eating and what she didn't like. As soon as a plate was placed in front of her she grabbed food with both hands and shoved it in her mouth, so fast it scared them both.

"It might be because she starved while she was... there" They nodded and Yuuri went closer and grabbed the untouched spoon.

"Let's use this" He whispered and took a spoonful of green peas and brought it to her dirty mouth that opened right away for the new delivery. "Mmm, delicious, isn't it? And we don't get dirty if we use the spoon" He assured and she blinked, a bit unsure by the use of words.

"Diwty?" Her eyes became watery and she looked heartbroken, very different from what they've seen in the garden. "No" She shook her head and looked at her now-dirty clothes. "No diwty" She grabbed the plain t-shirt she was wearing and tried to wipe the food off it desperately. "No" She continued and she looked ready to hyperventilate so Yuuri left the spoon down and gulped, looking at her.

"Look at me, Lo." He whispered. "It's just food, we'll wash it and it will go away, nothing bad will happen, I promise" He grabbed her small hands. "I promise" He suspected bad things happened if she got herself dirty in the past but he didn't want to think about that at all, instead he wiped her tears away with his thumbs. "There's my pretty girl" He cooed and she calmed down a bit before he started feeding her again.

After that they watched cartoons in the playroom, Lola in between them, her eyes concentrated on the Bugs Bunny on the screen as her small arms were wrapped around her own bunny.

"Do you like Bugs a lot?" Viktor asked and she nodded.

"Do you?" He chuckled.

"I like Bugs but I like Duffy too." He answered and she giggled.

"He's funny" They were both surprised by the sound so they smiled widely at her.

"He is" The Russian agreed and smiled when he realised that during their watching she has been leaning towards him so now her head was pressed against his arm. He made a gentle gesture of moving so he could wrap it around her and she sighed, her lids obviously dropping. "I think it's time for bed, princess" She didn't argue at all, she got up and headed for the stairs where she was picked up by Yuuri. When they reached her room she hurried towards her old suitcase and fumbled to open it and pick something from it. She came back with a small children's book, which was "Snow White" – terribly looking, a few pages missing, and bent at every corner and she offered it to Viktor who took it without second thought.

"Pwease"

"Of course" He whispered and sat on the edge of the bed, Yuuri joining him. His voice was tender in the quiet room and he read all of it a few times before she fell asleep, guarded by her bunny and her new teddy bear. They couldn't help themselves so they each pressed a soft kiss to her head, making sure she was comfortable and warm.

"Will you be back tomorrow?" Mrs. Graham asked when they saw they were ready to leave and they both said "yes" without a second thought. All they spoke about that night was Lola, watching the few pictures they took in the garden with fondness, enthusiastic about seeing her again. Now, that she began to slowly open up they were sure to reach the conclusion in a day or two.

The next day they didn't wait to be noon to go see her, they were there before 10 AM and found her on the stairs in front of the building, where she placed a blue blanket and her toys. When she saw them she got up immediately and ran towards them, beaming at the sight of them but unsure of how to react so they both bent and Yuuri hugged her.

"We missed you too, Lo" He whispered and picked her up, letting Viktor kiss her forehead. She was still hesitant when he moved suddenly but it was clear she was trying not to be scared anymore because after all, he hasn't done anything bad to her.

"Hi, princess" He greeted and she smiled shyly as they moved inside.

"Thank God! She's been there ever since she opened her eyes this morning! She hurried everything just to wait for you" Mrs. Graham said and they smiled, feeling their hearts flutter.

"Is that true, sweetheart?" Viktor asked and she nodded. "We'll come sooner tomorrow, I promise"

A/N: Thank you for reading! I hope you enjoyed this brand new chapter ^_^ I am still nervous every time I post! I am eagerly waiting for your opinions so feel free to review! See you! xx