Two months following the events of "Special: Part II"
Ellie awoke feeling utterly nauseous. She slid out of bed, pulled on a pair of blue jeans and a red t-shirt before going into the bathroom down the hall.
Ellie turned on the faucet and shook her head in frustration. She took a couple of deep breaths and rubbed her temples, trying to get rid of a headache.
Ellie looked up when she felt a hand slide around her midriff and as her husband's chin rested on her shoulder.
Matthew reached past Ellie and turned off the unused water. "No drink?"
Ellie shrugged against his chest. "I'm so sick of water. It doesn't help," she moaned. She closed her eyes and leaned her head against Matthew's. "Sorry that I woke you."
"I had to get up in a few minutes anyway," Matthew said softly. He stepped back and placed a hand on her shoulder. "I'm sorry you don't feel great."
"Me too," Ellie said, standing upright. "The nicest weather we've had this summer and I feel like shit."
"You're talking as if you weren't planning on spending the entire day at the shop or the Foundation rather being than outside," Matthew said.
Ellie turned and leaned against the sink. "I won't feel sick if I'm occupied."
"If you start feeling worse, maybe you should take some time," Matthew advised, putting his hands in his black pajama pants' pockets. "You run your ass off, you're bound to get worse."
"You should talk," Ellie teased. "You don't exactly sit still either."
"I'm not made that way," Matthew agreed.
Ellie nodded and they returned to the bedroom to get dressed.
"I probably won't be back until late," Matthew said as he pulled on a ripped blue shirt and black pants. "Tommy asked if I could help train a few of the new people we brought in last week."
"Sounds like fun," Ellie commented unenthusiastically.
"He says I get a good read on people," Matthew said, grabbing his crossbow. "Whatever that means."
"Here," Ellie said, handing Matthew a carabiner clip.
"Thanks," Matthew said as he clipped the crossbow to his belt. He looked at Ellie. "You're still cool with me going over the Wall today, right."
"As long as you're back before you're supposed to be," Ellie said, turning away.
"If you don't want me to go, I can stick around," Matthew said gently. "You know, just in case you start feeling worse."
"I don't want you to go out there," Ellie admitted as she pulled on her sneakers. She turned to him and smiled sadly. "But not because I'm not feeling a hundred percent."
"I'll be safe," Matthew promised. "Trust me."
"I do," Ellie said honestly.
"Alright," Matthew said. He kissed her on the cheek. "I'll see you tonight."
Ellie grabbed the rest of her stuff, moved to the kitchen, and started brewing some coffee. After a small meal that didn't make her feel any better. Ellie sat down at the table, placing the cup of coffee across from her.
Joel walked down the stairs a minute later and sat down, wearing a loose black t- shirt and pants. He looked at Ellie. "You feelin' okay?"
"Aside from the headache and feeling like I want to puke my guts out," Ellie said sarcastically. "Yeah. I feel fine."
"Maybe you should go see Heather," Joel suggested.
"I'll be fine," Ellie groaned. "Jesus Christ. It's like you guys have never seen me fucking sick before."
Joel grunted. "You swear more when you're sick."
"I swear anyway," Ellie said, rubbing her temples.
"Like a sailor," Joel said. He scratched his head. "I talked to Maria. She says Joey and Heather are planning on moving in together tonight."
"Yeah, Heather told me last night," Ellie said. She leaned back in her chair. "It's about time. They've only known each other for eight years."
"Remember that you and the kid have lived together since the day you met," Joel said, sipping his coffee.
"That's not the same," Ellie insisted, sitting down. "And will you stop calling him 'kid'? I married the guy. I think that permits a name upgrade."
"I'll stop calling him 'kid' when he stops calling me 'sir'," Joel said as he took another sip.
"Like that's ever going to happen," Ellie said, rolling her eyes. She looked out the window. "I'd better get going. I'll see you tonight."
"Come home if you're not feeling good," Joel said.
Ellie held up a thumb and walked out the door.
…
Matthew walked up to the south end of Jackson and waited as Tim finished talking to one of the men on the Wall.
Tim was dressed in light blue shirt and black jeans. Attached to one hip was a walkie-talkie and the other a handgun.
"I figured you'd volunteer," Tim said turning to Matthew.
"You trust someone else to do it?" Matthew asked, exchanging nods with one of the men on the Wall.
"Walk the entire length of the fence after a lightning storm that could potentially have knocked out the power?" Tim asked calmly. "Not really. Your ears are still better than everyone else's. You'll spot the holes quickly. Just be careful. We haven't done a scouting run in a while and we don't know where the Infected ended up after that storm last week."
"I will," Matthew promised. "I was going to scout a little beyond the fence too. Just in case."
"I'm assuming Ellie's cool with that?" Tim said.
Matthew raised an eyebrow.
Tim raised his hands. "Just making sure."
"She's cool," Matthew answered.
Tim motioned to the handgun that rested on his hip. "No best men allowed?"
"I move quicker on my own," Matthew said. He lowered his voice. "Keep an eye on Ellie for me. She's not feeling great."
"I'll drop by the Foundation later," Tim said. He handed Matthew a walkie-talkie. "See you in a bit."
"Thanks," Matthew said, strapping the device to his belt.
…
Around mid-day, Ellie walked into the Foundation and started setting up for the three separate meetings she was going to host.
As Ellie placed the third stool on the ground, she suddenly felt exhausted and her breath left her. Ellie sat down on the stool, breathing heavily. She tried to stand quickly when Marcus and Vanessa walked in the door.
Marcus wore a brown shirt and jeans. He had a walkie-talkie strapped to his hip. Vanessa was wearing a blue t-shirt and pair of green shorts. She had a notebook and pencil in her hand.
Vanessa looked at Ellie in concern and walked over, placing a free hand on her shoulder. "You okay, girlfriend?" she asked Ellie "You look like—"
"Like I'm just tired," Ellie said firmly. She sniffled and stood to grab another stool. "How was your date with Tim last night?"
"Awesome, like always," Vanessa answered, grabbing a stool herself.
"I'm glad you guys got through that rough patch last month," Ellie said casually.
"We had the stupidest fights," Vanessa said with a small laugh.
"Those happen," Marcus informed the two women. "Just push through 'em."
"That's our motto," Ellie said as another headache threatened to turn into a migraine.
"It doesn't have to be that way today," Marcus said, glancing at Ellie. "You really do look like shit."
"Thanks," Ellie said. She grabbed another stool. "I'll survive."
Vanessa offered Ellie a water bottle.
Ellie shook her head.
"If you're sure," Marcus said uncertainly. He looked at Vanessa. "By the way, thanks for taking Janet's shift later. She wants to be home for when the girl's visit."
"It's not a problem," Vanessa replied.
"What's going on?" Ellie asked as she grabbed another stool.
"My daughter's been acting… interesting the last few weeks," Marcus explained. "Janet and I are starting to think that there may be something more going on."
"How old is she now?" Ellie asked.
"Seven," Marcus answered. "Anyway, I asked if Lin and Clarisse could drop by. I've heard they're pretty good at reading kids."
"Very trusting," Ellie said, remembering her first meeting with Marcus at the Foundation.
"I learned a long time ago not to judge wisdom by age," Marcus said.
…
Tim walked into the Foundation as a meeting ended mid-afternoon. He glanced at Ellie and knew instantly knew why Matthew had been concerned.
Tim walked forward and placed a hand on Vanessa's shoulder. She glanced up and smiled as Ellie moved to the back office.
Tim looked at Vanessa. "How much longer of a day does Ellie have?"
"Two more meetings," Vanessa said. She sighed. "I've already tried to talk to her."
"I'll take a gander," Tim said.
"Good luck," Vanessa said. "I got to get going."
"Tell Janet I said 'hi'," Tim said.
Tim stood outside of the office until Ellie emerged a few minutes later.
Ellie held up a hand as Tim opened his mouth. "Don't even try," she said, taking a deep breath. "I'm not puking which means I'm not sick."
Tim closed his mouth.
"My husband send you to spy?" Ellie asked.
Tim shrugged.
"That answers that question," Ellie said. She felt another headache beginning to form. "I can't really blame him. I suppose he didn't want you to go with him today."
"I tried," Tim said with a shrug. "But you're both stubborn."
Ellie rubbed her temples.
Tim looked around as people started walking in. "How about you take the night off," he said, looking around. "Marcus and I can hold down the fort here."
"I'll be fine," Ellie insisted.
"Look," Tim said, stepping forward. "I know that this place means a lot to you, but in my opinion, you'll be much better at your job healthy rather than sick."
Ellie looked around for a moment. "I guess…"
"Go home," Tim ordered. "Jackson will survive without you for a night."
…
Ellie exited the Foundation and started walking. She didn't pay particular attention to the direction she was moving.
Ellie started walking faster as she realized that this would be the first meeting for the Foundation that she had ever missed. She felt herself grow frustrated. Great. Just fucking great. I'm not even sick and now I'm abandoning everyone. Ellie saw her house ahead and sighed. At least I wasn't bleeding the entire week. I usually bleed around… oh no.
Ellie turned and started jogging in the direction of Heather's house.
…
Heather handed a stack of papers to Steven. "That should be all the files on your side of Jackson," she said, also handing him a notepad from her blue jeans and a pencil that was resting in the pocket of her white t-shirt.
"Thanks," Steven said, placing the materials in his bag. He placed the bag over his shoulder, allowing it to lay across his brown t-shirt and light blue jeans, and looked at his watch. "I'd better get going."
"If you have any questions, you know where to find me," Heather said. Over Steven's shoulder she spotted Ellie moving quickly toward the house. Heather turned to Steven. "You'll do great. Jackson could use a good doctor like you."
Steven nodded and turned away as Ellie walked forward.
"Hi," Heather said.
"Hey," Ellie said quickly. She moved past Heather and into the house. "I need to take something from your file thingy and you can't ask what."
Heather opened her mouth to reply, but Ellie was already moving down the hallway. Heather shrugged as Arata slowly walked into the house. The cat hesitated, bobbing on her old legs before hopping up onto the couch.
Joey walked in behind the cat, hauling two boxes. "These are the last two," he said, setting them down. He grabbed a piece of paper from the back pocket of his blue jeans and checked something off before shoving the pencil into the pocket of his green t-shirt. "That's my entire old bedroom."
"Cool," Heather said. She looked in the boxes. "The clothes can go in the new bedroom, and the other box can go in the kitchen until we have time to sort through everything."
"Alright," Joey said. He walked toward the bedroom and turned back to Heather. "I'm glad we're finally doing this."
Heather smiled. "I'd say it was a long time coming, but…"
"We weren't ready," Joey agreed with a nod. "But I'm glad we're finally ready."
"Me too," Heather said.
Joey continued to the bedroom, meeting Ellie in the hallway. "Hi, Ellie."
"Hi, Joey…" Ellie said distantly, walking past him and out the door.
Joey looked at Heather.
Heather shrugged.
Joey returned the gesture before walking into the bedroom, Arata following close behind.
Heather walked into the kitchen and cleared some space. She noticed several pieces of paper from her file cabinet sitting on the counter. Heather read a few and her eyes widened.
Heather immediately turned and ran out the door. She caught up with Ellie half a block away from the house. "Ellie," she called
"I don't want to talk about it," Ellie said firmly, turning to Heather.
Heather stopped. She put her hands up in surrender. "We don't have to," she promised.
"Thank you," Ellie said, turning away.
"Have you gone to the bathroom recently," Heather called.
"What?" Ellie asked, turning around again. She shook her head. "No. What the fuck are you talking about?"
"Have you been drinking a lot of water?"
"I quit water this morning," Ellie grumbled. "It's not helping."
"Good," Heather said. She took a step back. "Good. Just… if you need anything…"
"I know," Ellie said. She walked away.
Heather looked at the ground with a small smile. A second later, her eyes went wide. "Oh shit! Joey!"
Heather ran back into the house, down the hallway, and into the kitchen.
Joey turned to her. He was clutching one of the pieces of paper in his hand. He had a look of fear and confusion on his face. "Is um… is there something I need to know."
"It's not us!" Heather said quickly. "It's not us, Joey."
Joey let out a breath as a look of relief crossed his face. He laughed and sat down in a chair. "Thank God. So… Ellie."
"Yeah," Heather said awkwardly. She moved past Joey and placed all the papers back in the cabinet. "But we're gonna keep that to ourselves. She seems a bit shook up."
"I'm still trying to stop myself from shaking," Joey said with a nervous chuckle.
Heather sat on the counter. There was a moment of silence before she looked at Joey. "Would it have been that bad?"
"What?" Joey asked.
"Us," Heather said, glancing at the cabinet. "Would it have been…"
"No," Joey said quickly. He started stammering. "No, I didn't mean it that way. I just, well, I'd rather it not come as a surprise."
"I don't see how it wouldn't," Heather said. She looked down at the floor and sighed. "I'm glad it wasn't us this time either."
Joey was silent for a few seconds. He looked at Heather. "We never talked about it. Well, I didn't think you wanted to talk about it. I mean we only been… and plus, it's our first night in."
Heather hopped off the counter. "Well, I don't exactly think about it all the time, but…" her sentence trailed off. She shook her head. "You're right. It's our first night in. Let's not get too complicated."
"But you want to talk about it?" Joey pressed.
"I think it's something we should talk about eventually," Heather answered.
"I think we should too," Joey agreed. He reached forward and grabbed Heather's hand, speaking quietly. "I don't want to be the cause of… I don't want to make you uncomfortable. And I can't say I'll understand what… how you feel about…"
Heather squeezed his hand. "You are not the man who… you are not him," she said firmly.
Joey nodded. "You still trust me, right?"
"More than anyone," Heather said. She leaned forward and kissed Joey, who returned the kiss. Heather hopped into his lap, speaking lightly. "We should get drunk tonight."
"Yeah?" Joey asked.
"Yeah," Heather said. She wrapped her hands around his shoulders. "We should get drunk, and then we'll talk about it."
"Yeah…" Joey skeptically. "I have a hard enough time keeping my stupid mouth shut without alcohol."
"But it's honest," Heather pointed out.
"That's true," Joey said.
"It's a date," Heather said. She stood and grabbed the box that Joey had brought into the kitchen. "Let's see what we got here."
…
Ellie looked at the paper in her hand grabbed the long unopened container of white vinegar. She poured half a cup of the liquid into a bowl she'd retrieved from the cupboard. We're never going to use this bowl again.
Ellie picked up the bowl and walked into the bathroom, closing and locking the door behind her.
…
The sun was starting to set as Clarisse and Lin were walking across Jackson to meet Marcus at the Foundation.
As they were moving down the street, Clarisse noticed Ellie sitting against the side of her house. Her fist was clenching and unclenching. She was staring at the ground.
"You should go talk to her," Lin advised, following Clarisse's gaze.
"You're good talking to Marcus?" Clarisse asked.
"No problem," Lin said. "I'll see you at home."
"Which home?" Clarisse asked. "Yours or mine?"
"The place where I said 'yes'," Lin replied, squeezing Clarisse's hand.
"Did I ever say that asking you out was the best thing I've ever done?" Clarisse asked happily.
Lin shrugged. "Only a few times a week."
Clarisse smiled, walked over to Ellie, and stood in front of her for a full ten seconds. "Ellie."
Ellie jumped in surprise. "Oh… hi, Clarisse."
"What's wrong?" Clarisse asked, sitting down next to Ellie.
"Nothing," Ellie said. She shook her head. "How was… how was Marcus' kid."
"We have an idea," Clarisse answered. She grabbed Ellie's hands to stop her from fidgeting. "What? Is? Going? On?"
Ellie opened her mouth to reply but stopped when Clarisse raised an eyebrow. Ellie chuckled. "You know, I miss the time when I could read your mind," she said to the young woman in front of her.
"I don't," Clarisse said.
Ellie looked down again.
Clarisse prodded Ellie with her fingers. "Now I get to be the pushy one."
"Pushy, huh?" Ellie said, a small smile forming on her face. "I was pushy?"
"Sometimes," Clarisse replied. "Start talking."
Ellie was silent for a few minutes and sighed. "I'm… I've got a problem that I don't know how to deal with."
"I thought you knew how to deal with everything," Clarisse said, growing somewhat concerned. "Can I help?"
Ellie gulped. "Not this time."
Clarisse noticed a paper in Ellie's hand and reached for it.
Ellie quickly pulled Clarisse's hand away and shoved the piece of paper in her pocket.
Clarisse backed off with another look of confusion.
"Like I said. Not this time, kiddo," Ellie apologetically.
Clarisse nodded and leaned back. "When I was having trouble in school and I wouldn't let Timmy help me fix it," she said carefully. "He would always tell me to sleep on it. Everything looks better the next day."
Ellie thought for a moment and smiled. "That's a smart brother you got there."
"He has his moments," Clarisse admitted. She lowered her voice to a whisper. "I told him to take his own advice the night he asked Vanessa out."
"Bet you're still holding that over him," Ellie commented, finally seeming to relax.
"I'm saving that story for a special occasion," Clarisse said.
"What occasion is that?" Ellie asked.
Clarisse didn't answer.
…
Matthew grabbed Tommy's hand and allowed the older man to haul him up onto the Wall.
"Any problems?" Tommy asked, eyeing the blood stain on Matthew's shirt.
"Not for me," Matthew said. He nodded to Maria, who stood on the Wall beside them. "There were no shorts on the fence, but I had to untangle a few animals."
"Any Infected?" Tommy asked.
"Seven," Matthew said.
"I don't suppose I need to test you," Tommy said, patting the scanning device on his arm.
"They didn't get that close," Matthew said, tapping his crossbow.
"And the blood stain on your shirt?" Maria asked.
Matthew reached into his backpack and extracted a handgun. "Two Bandits," he explained. "I followed them for half an hour. They were the last of their group."
"And?" Maria asked.
"A damn bird gave me away," Matthew explained. He ejected the clip from the handgun as well as the round in the chamber, handing both to Tommy. "Fully loaded. They didn't have a chance to use it."
Tommy raised an eyebrow.
"I gave them a chance," Matthew said calmly. He shook his head. "They didn't take it."
Tommy nodded and pocketed the mag and bullet before shoving the empty weapon into his belt. "Well, I'm glad you got home safe. You still willing to help out with the training tonight?"
"Lead the way," Matthew replied.
"Your wife is going to be pissed at you," Maria commented, motioning to the stain on Matthew's shirt.
"I know," Matthew said.
…
Ellie looked at her clock. It was well past midnight. She had been laying in the bed since she'd come inside, attempting to collect her thoughts. She hadn't bothered changing into her night clothes and only chose to take off the sleeve that covered her bite.
The door to the house opened and closed.
Ellie turned off her CD player and shoved the piece of paper she was holding into the drawer of her bedside table.
Matthew walked into the bedroom a few seconds later.
Ellie looked at him with a forced smile. The smile disappeared when she saw a blood stain on the left arm of Matthew's shirt.
"Don't worry," Matthew said. He took off the shirt and placed it in a laundry basket before taking the walkie-talkie off his belt and placing it on the bedside table. "It's not mine."
"Not yet," Ellie said irritably. Her exhaustion and stress started to take over again. "This is why I tried to get Tim to go with you."
"I had it handled," Matthew insisted. "The Infected didn't even get close."
"Somebody obviously fucking did!" Ellie snapped.
Matthew looked at her, confused.
Ellie sighed in frustration and turned away.
"Okay…" Matthew said calmly. "You're obviously pissed about something."
"It's been a hard day," Ellie said. She sat on the bed. "A long day."
"You wanna talk about it?" Matthew asked, sitting beside her.
Ellie opened her mouth, tempted to tell him everything. She found that she didn't know how to tell him. Not yet.
Ellie shook her head. She laid down on the bed without a word. A few seconds later, she felt Matthew lay beside her and place a cautious hand on her shoulder.
Ellie shied away from his touch for the first time in years.
"It's me," Matthew said quietly. "It's me, isn't it?"
Ellie rolled over and turned to him. "It's not you… it's 'us'."
"In what way?" Matthew asked, looking nervous.
"It's not 'us' in the way that you're thinking," Ellie said. She reached out and touched his hair. "I'm not that mad."
"What is it then?" Matthew asked, grabbing her hand. "How is it 'us'?"
"It's 'us' in a way that's… complicated."
Matthew smiled slightly. "You really don't want to tell me right now."
"I'll tell you in the morning," Ellie said softly. "I promise."
Matthew squeezed her hand and let their arms fall to the bed together. Their rings touched with a soft clink. "Okay," he said.
Ellie rolled over and closed her eyes. She fell asleep almost immediately.
Ellie smiled at the group of people standing around her. Heather, Joey, Tim, and Clarisse stood around the small bed Ellie laid upon. Matthew and Joel stood next to her.
Ellie felt happy. Just as happy as she ever had with Riley. With Joel. With Matthew. She felt happy. Ellie smiled at Joel and Matthew before looking at the white bundle in her arms. It was beautiful.
Ellie hugged the bundle close. It cooed softly.
Ellie felt tears welling up into her eyes. She didn't bother to wipe them. She never bothered to wipe tears of happiness. She started to turn the bundle, wanting to once again to gaze at the face within.
As Ellie turned the bundle, she saw a small lock of red hair.
The moment grew cold. Ellie saw her breath and that of the white bundle's turn cold. A gust of wind blew through them. Ellie felt her long hair whip around and wrap itself into a ponytail.
Ellie looked up and watched as Heather and Joey disappeared, fading away as if they never existed. Clarisse and Tim shrunk from happy, smiling, confident young adults into kids. The wind was joined by the sound of Clickers. A look of fear crossed Timmy and Clarisse's faces before they disappeared as well.
Ellie's wedding ring and necklace flew from her body and whipped through Joel and Matthew, turning them to puffs of smoke.
Beyond the dissipating mist, Ellie spotted Riley as she too faded from existence.
Ellie squeezed her eyes shut.
"I lost them," Ellie whispered. "They're gone."
The chanting began again.
"You're alone."
Ellie tightened her grip on the white bundle, determined not to let it slip from her grasp.
The wind stopped. All went silent. There was nothing.
Nothing but Ellie and the bundle.
Ellie held the bundle close. "I lost them. I won't lose you."
The bundle squealed and started to move.
Ellie slowly started to turn the bundle.
The bundle stopped moving. A few seconds later, it started twitching.
The bundle slowly rotated, as if on its own accord.
Ellie watched.
The bundle grew cold as it continued to twitch.
There was another gust of wind as Ellie's sleeve flew off, exposing her bite. The rotating bundle began to turn brown and green as fungus started to grow upon it.
The turning stopped as Ellie gazed at the sleeping baby within the bundle.
The baby opened its eyes. They were tinted with a hint of red.
The baby's mouth opened unnaturally and sharp teeth flashed as it screeched loudly.
…
"Ellie!" Matthew shouted, trying to keep a hold of his screaming wife. "Ellie, wake up! Hey, wake up!"
Ellie stopped screaming. She was breathing heavily, drenched in sweat as her eyes began to focus.
"You're here," Matthew said, cupping her face in his hands. "You're here. With me."
Ellie put hand on her stomach and shook her head as tears began to flow. "Where's my knife?" she asked quickly. "Where's my knife?"
"What?" Matthew asked.
Ellie pulled herself from his grasp.
Matthew stood. "It's in the drawer, where it always is. Ellie, what's going on?"
Ellie didn't answer as she attempted to open the drawer with her shaking hand. On the third attempt, she yanked the drawer from the table. It landed on the floor with a loud thud, causing Winston to scatter.
"Ellie," Matthew said again. He reached for her. "Just talk to me."
Ellie grabbed her switchblade knife and a piece of paper from the drawer. She ran out the door and out of the house.
Matthew jogged out of behind her, almost running straight into Joel who was coming off the stairs.
"What's going on?" Joel asked, his eyes filled with concern,
"I don't know," Matthew said. He shook his head. "I don't know. She was having a nightmare and then she just started screaming."
"Any idea what it was about?" Joel asked.
"No," Matthew said. He quickly ran into the bedroom to grab his outfit from the previous night. As he dressed, Matthew raised his voice so Joel could hear. "I don't get it. She was acting weird last night, but… I don't know."
"Do you have any idea where she went?" Joel asked.
"She didn't say," Matthew said, returning to Joel. "She just took her knife and ran off."
Joel ran upstairs and returned with a green flannel shirt and a pair of jeans before exiting the house with Matthew.
Joel immediately turned toward the south side of the Wall.
"Joel," Matthew said quickly. "She's not leaving."
Joel turned back to Matthew. "She didn't say anything to you," the older man said quietly. "And she sure as hell didn't say anything to me. And you don't know where she's going."
"Ellie's not the same person she was when you and I met her," Matthew said calmly. "She wouldn't run. Not from us."
Joel gulped and nodded. "Okay, kid. But we still have no idea where she went."
"I think I might know where she's going," Matthew said.
Matthew led Joel to the park.
Clarisse was already there with Lin. The two young women stood near the trees leading to Matthew and Ellie's spot. Clarisse was talking quietly to Lin who had a look of concern on her face.
"Shit," Matthew said under his breath.
Joel slowed to a stop and turned to him.
Matthew shook his head. "Ellie wasn't wearing her sleeve."
"Lin doesn't know?" Joel asked.
"Didn't," Matthew corrected as Clarisse walked forward.
"She just flew past us," Clarisse said quickly to Joel and Matthew.
Clarisse and Lin were each wearing a pair of red shorts and blue t-shirts.
Lin still a look of concern and confusion on her face. Her gaze was fixed on the trees leading to Matthew and Ellie's spot.
"She wouldn't even talk to me," Clarisse said.
Matthew placed a hand on Clarisse's shoulder. "Clarisse, do you know what's going on?"
"No," Clarisse answered. "I don't. She came by so fast… She was holding her knife. I haven't seen her with the knife in years."
"She was pretty upset when she left the house," Joel said.
"She um…" Clarisse pointed at the ground near the entrance to the park. "She had a piece of paper. She dropped part of it on the ground there."
"Clarisse," Joel said, lowering his voice. "Does Lin—"
"Don't worry about Lin," Clarisse said, holding up a hand. "I'll take care of that. I'll talk to her and then I'll talk to her dad. You two just take care of Ellie."
"Thank you, Clarisse," Joel said.
Matthew retrieved the half-ripped piece of paper Ellie had dropped, unfolding it. He closed the paper almost immediately.
Joel looked at Matthew expectantly.
"She'll want to talk to you," Matthew said after a few seconds.
Joel looked at the piece of paper in Matthew's hand. "What do you know, kid?"
Matthew crumpled the paper in his hand. "She'll want to talk to you," he repeated firmly.
Joel made eye contact with Matthew for a few seconds before turning and walking off into the trees.
As soon as Joel was out of sight and Clarisse had returned to Lin, Matthew looked at the paper in his hand again. He put a hand over his mouth as a slew of emotions came rushing through him.
…
Ellie looked up from her knife and the ripped piece of paper in her hand as Joel walked into the secluded area of the park that Ellie and Matthew had made their hangout so long ago.
Ellie didn't know what to say.
Joel remained silent, as if he was experiencing the same feeling. He ran his hand the length of the hammock that Ellie and Matthew made as he spoke. "This is uh… this is a nice place you guys made."
"Thanks," Ellie said, her voice barely above a whisper. She forced herself to stop fidgeting with her knife and slowly placed it in her pocket before clearing her throat. "Thanks. We put up the hammock the second night we got back here."
Joel traced his hand along the hammock again. "What are you doing here, Ellie?"
"Nightmare," Ellie half-lied.
"I've seen you have nightmares," Joel said calmly, turning to her. "This was a hell of a lot bigger than a normal nightmare."
"This one was different," Ellie said sharply.
Joel looked at her for a moment before taking a seat on the ground to her right. "You gonna tell me what's going on, kiddo?"
Ellie gulped and looked straight ahead, slowly holding the paper in her hand out to Joel.
Joel glanced at it, spotting what Ellie had been staring at for over half an hour. The handwritten words had long since, been engrained in her head.
Homemade Pregnancy Test
"Oh boy," Joel said quietly, looking down.
"I didn't mean for it to happen," Ellie said with a shudder.
"People rarely do," Joel said comfortingly, looking at her.
"I…" Ellie closed her mouth for a moment. "I don't know what to do."
"What do you mean?" Joel asked.
"I don't know… how," Elie said. She shook her head as she finally started to speak her mind. "I don't know what to do. I mean, how the hell do I raise a baby in… Even if it does come out normal."
"Is that what your nightmare was about?" Joel asked. "The baby…"
"Infected," Ellie confirmed. She allowed a single tear to fall from her eye. "It was Infected and I was… we were alone."
"You're not alone," Joel said firmly, placing a hand on Ellie's shoulder.
"That doesn't stop me from being afraid," Ellie said. "And Matthew—"
"Matthew doesn't matter right now," Joel said firmly. He took a breath. "Nothing matters right now but one question."
Ellie turned and looked into his eyes.
"Do you want this child?" Joel asked.
Ellie looked down and remained silent.
Joel squeezed her shoulder. "Kiddo, you need to understand that what I'm asking has nothing to do with the pregnancy or the baby."
"I know," Ellie said softly.
Joel removed his hand to stroke the watch on his wrist. "Knowing the answer to that question will help you get through this."
"Through the rest of my life?" Ellie asked, not really believing him.
"Try the next five minutes," Joel said kindly.
"Even that's too long," Ellie mumbled. "Or not long enough."
"It's still a question to be answered," Joel said. He spoke calmly and firmly. "Do you, Ellie, want this child?"
Ellie looked down at the ground in front of her, allowing all emotion in for the first time since she'd found out she was pregnant. She thought of the being, the child inside of her.
Ellie was silent for five seconds as she absorbed all the emotion. Regret. Elation. Fear. Eagerness. Love. Possession.
Ellie nodded "It's mine," she said. Ellie looked at Joel and spoke firmly. "She's mine."
"She?" Joel asked, raising an eyebrow.
Ellie nodded again. "It's a 'she'," she said softly with certainty.
Joel smiled softly. "Then you'll do what you need to do to keep this child safe and happy."
They sat in silence for a time before Joel stood. "I'll give you and Matthew some time."
"Joel," Ellie said quickly, standing up.
Joel turned to her.
Ellie hugged him, her head resting on his chest.
Joel hugged her back.
Ellie looked up at him. "Thank you."
Joel brushed a strand of hair out of Ellie's eye, speaking as a tear fell down his cheek. "You'll be a great mom, baby girl."
…
Matthew took another deep breath as Joel emerged from the trees, walking straight toward him.
Joel walked straight up to Matthew, his face unreadable.
Matthew didn't know what to expect. He looked Joel in the eye, determined to look brave despite how he felt.
"You know what you have to do?" Joel asked.
"Anything and everything I can," Matthew answered. He looked at the trees before returning his gaze to Joel. "I'm not going anywhere, Joel."
Joel nodded and placed his hand on Matthew's shoulder as he spoke. "Go talk to your wife, Matthew."
Joel patted Matthew's shoulder and gave it a gentle squeeze as he walked away.
Matthew walked around the trees. Ellie moved over slightly as Matthew sat down in front his wife. They sat together in silence for a few minutes.
Matthew opened his mouth several times, but once again had no idea what to say.
"So, now what do we do?" Ellie asked lightly.
"I don't know," Matthew answered honestly.
"Well, you always know what do," Ellie said. She sighed dramatically. "I guess we're fucked."
"I'll do whatever you want," Matthew said quickly. He looked at Ellie as a small amount of emotion entered his voice. "I'll do whatever you want. I'll stop leaving Jackson. I'll take less shifts on the Wall. I'll go to the Foundation—"
"You don't need to change everything for me," Ellie interrupted, grabbing his hands. She spoke softly and with emotion. "Or for her. I just need to know that you're here. Because I don't want to do this by myself."
"You won't," Matthew promised. He spoke firmly. "I'm here."
"Good," Ellie said, visibly relieved. She looked at the hammock for a moment before looking at Matthew. She swallowed. "I need you to change one thing."
"The last change I made didn't turn out too bad," Matthew said, rubbing the ring on Ellie's finger.
Ellie slowly reached out and touched Matthew's shirt, using her thumb to rub the material against the long-healed knife wound on Matthew's shoulder. "I don't want you going out there on your own again. Not without me, Joey, or Tim."
"Yes, ma'am," Matthew said without hesitation.
Ellie nodded and touched her stomach. "You can't ask me to explain to our daughter why her dad isn't around."
"There'll be enough to explain as it is," Matthew said as a new set of fears rushed in.
Ellie stood and held out her hand. "Let's go for a walk," she said.
…
Ellie and Matthew wandered out from behind the trees.
Matthew stopped.
Ellie looked at him, confused.
"We may have a problem," Matthew said. He pointed at Ellie's exposed bite. "Could be a big one."
"Shit!" Ellie said loudly. "I'm forgot the stupid sleeve… Lin was here."
"Clarisse said she would handle it," Matthew said calmly. "If not, we'll figure something out. But I think we should trust Clarisse on this. If anyone can convince Lin, it's her."
"We're about to find out," Ellie said under her breath as Lin cautiously walked toward them from the entrance of the park.
Lin was alone. She walked up to Ellie and stood silently, as if unsure of what to say. After a few seconds of silence, she held out her hand.
Ellie looked at Matthew for a moment before holding up her hand as well.
Lin reached forward slowly and touched Ellie's arm, looking at the bite.
"I'm sure you have a few questions," Ellie said as Matthew placed an arm around his wife's shoulder. "We're ready."
"Does it hurt?" Lin asked.
"Not anymore," Ellie answered. "Not for a long, long time."
"Okay," Lin answered. She let go of Ellie's arm and placed her hands in her pockets. "I promise I won't tell anyone."
"Just like that?" Ellie asked, exchanging a surprised look with Matthew. She looked at Lin. "You don't want to know anything else?"
"After everything you've done for my dad and me," Lin said with a small smile. She looked at Matthew. "After everything everyone in Jackson has done… it'd be pointless to make a problem of something that doesn't exist."
"That's… um…" Ellie was at a loss for words.
"That's very grown up of you," Matthew completed for her.
"Extremely," Ellie added, smiling at Matthew appreciatively.
Lin shrugged. She reached into her back pocket and handed Ellie a sleeve. "My dad wanted me to give this to you," she said as Ellie took the sleeve. "He wanted me to tell you that he always knew there was more than one 'Winter Flower' in Jackson."
Ellie stared at the sleeve in her hand.
Lin walked away.
"Son of a bitch," Ellie muttered. She looked at Matthew. "He knew. He always knew."
"I'm not complaining," Matthew said. He started walking with Ellie. "Although I think I've had my fill of surprises for the day."
Ellie and Matthew returned to the streets of Jackson before either of them spoke.
Ellie felt her husband's grip on her shoulder tighten and loosen. When she looked over, she found his face unreadable.
"What was the first thing you felt?" Ellie asked. She looked at Matthew. "When you figured it out?"
"Happy," Matthew answered.
Ellie knew he was telling the truth. "And the next one?" she asked.
Matthew stopped them. "You haven't asked me this many questions since we first met," he observed.
Ellie sighed. "When we first met, I couldn't get a good read on you. Ever since the night on the lake in Indiana…"
"When you kissed me," Matthew recalled.
"When you kissed me back," Ellie corrected. "Since then, I've always been able to know when somethings wrong. Right now, I… I can't get anything."
Matthew slowly started walking again. "Old reflexes," he said quietly.
"You're scared shitless," Ellie guessed. "Aren't you? You only close yourself off to me when you're scared."
"Scared shitless is putting it mildly," Matthew admitted.
"We should probably talk about that," Ellie suggested.
Matthew chuckled and looked at her. "Both of us?" he asked.
"Why not?" Ellie asked.
Matthew didn't answer right away.
Ellie reached out and grabbed his hand. "Look, I'm not saying we have to talk everything out and fix it right now. Let's just get the issues out there."
Matthew nodded. "Would you mind going first this time."
Ellie took a deep breath as they resumed a normal walking pace. "Okay. What if she is born and… she's Infected?"
"Can't change that," Matthew said simply. "And why is it a 'she'?"
"Were not talking through the crazy things right now, remember?" Ellie said, nudging his shoulder. She looked at the ground. "And it's a 'she'. Your turn."
Matthew was silent for a moment. "What if our child asks about Riley and I need to explain why they can't meet their aunt?"
Ellie squeezed his hand. "My turn. Um…" she hesitated before looking at the sleeve covering her bite. "I'm afraid of the fact that I'm going to have to burden her with my bite and all the lies and secrets that come with it."
"What if the kid hate's me?" Matthew asked.
Ellie looked at him and saw a tear running down his cheek.
Matthew looked away. "Sorry. That one was… too much."
"The fact is, she's stuck with you," Ellie said lightly. She leaned up and kissed Matthew on the cheek. "Because I love you. And personally, I think it would be pretty impossible to hate you."
"This is a lot more then I thought it would be," Matthew commented.
"No, it isn't," Ellie said, seeing through him once again.
Matthew nodded. "At this point, the list is surprisingly small," he muttered after a few seconds.
Ellie stopped them as they neared their house. "I promised myself that I wasn't going to go 'Foundation' when we started this conversation, but I'm going to do it anyway."
"What do you got?" Matthew asked.
"The difference between us having this conversation here," Ellie said, motioning to the community around them. Ellie then pointed toward the south side of the Wall. "And out there, is that it's not just us. It's not just you and me and Joel. We have people we can trust here. People our daughter can trust. Even when she doesn't want to talk to us. We have friends."
Matthew looked around them and looked at Ellie. "You're right," he said, seeming relieved. "We have family. Our child has family."
"A damn good one," Ellie said. They stood in front of their house. She looked at Matthew again. "You want to tell people tonight?"
"Sure," Matthew said.
They started walking again.
Ellie looked around. "So… what are we going to name her?"
"I haven't even gotten that far," Matthew said with a laugh.
"Rain check on baby names?" Ellie offered.
"Rain check," Matthew said.
They walked in silence until they reached Joey and Heather's house.
Matthew reached for the doorknob and hesitated. "About the baby names," he said, looking down. "I don't want her name to be… never mind."
Ellie placed a hand on his shoulder. "I don't think Riley's the right name either," she said quietly.
Matthew let out a breath. "Sorry. It's just…"
"Too soon," Ellie completed in agreement.
Matthew nodded and knocked on the door. He leaned close to Ellie's ear. "I'm really glad we're doing this," he said softly.
"Me too," Ellie said.
Ellie turned to Matthew and planted a kiss on his lips as the door to the house opened.