I wanted to post this chapter earlier but I have had complications with computer so sorry for the wait. I hope you like this chapter and please tell me your opinions and THANK YOU! Who reviewed my last chapter. I'm glad you've liked this so far.
Warnings: I don't think I have warnings about this chapter?
Notifications: I still don't own supernatural or anything related to that. I forgot to mention in earlier that I have pretty much no knowledge how mental hospitals work etc. so everything there is probably pretty much inaccurate.
I hope you enjoy this read. (I'm dying inside because I have to haul my ass in to the school in 11 day's)
"Dean!, help me Dean, please help", Sam screams from top of his lungs, "Dean you gotta wake up!".
I snap awake and try to get up but surprise, surprise I'm restrained. My mouth is dry and my ears hurt from Sam's screaming. Sam's screaming, oh god Sam. "Hello!", I shout, "Could someone get me out of here!" I try to shout a couple of more times but no one seems to hear me. I try to get my hands free but to my fortunate the restrains are too tight. "Son of a bitch" I shout frustrated. I look around the room and all my mind can procress is white. White ceiling, white walls, white floor, white door, white, white, white, did I mention that my clothes are white too. I fucking hate white, why do hospital have to be white. All the white makes me nauseous or it might be the drugs I obviously have bumped in my system, either way I feel like I might trough up.
After hours of waiting (In reality like half an hour) finally Michael comes through the white door. "Oh you are a wake now, how do you feel Dean?", he asks. "White", I say bluntly. "White?", he says questioning. "So when do I get out of this hell hole you are keeping me in?", I say looking Michael straight to the eyes.
Michael looks at his clip board and then says: "You get out of this 'hell hole' after we've chat a bit.". Of course he wants to 'chat' why wouldn't he? I look at him with fire in my eyes and if looks could kill he would've died an horrible death, several times. " Well can I at least get out of these", I spat as I move my hands in the restrains, " Because I gotta tell you laying here ain't comfy.".Why my head has to feel like I am wrapped up in cotton.
"I think those should stay on for a bit longer", Michael says calmly. "Son of a bitch lemme out", I spat. The doctor just takes a chair from outside the room, put's it next to my bed and sits down. "Dean, I have to say that I am concerned of your well being.", Michael says with a soft tone. "First I thought that you have just a depression which caused you to try suicide but now I think the depression might be a part of something bigger."
"No need to worry Doc I'm golden", I say with sarcasm. "Dean I know guys like you, pretending to be okay even in reality you're burnt out", Michael continues, " But now you don't have to pretend okay? We can help you Dean." Oh freaking god. We can help you Dean blah, blah, blah. Who does he think he is. Anger is building up in my chest. "You know nothing about me and I don't need your help! Understood?", I say furiously.
Michaels face visibly saddens and he clears his throat. Gosh now I see in two. There are two Michaels sitting next to me. Fudgin drugs. " I just don't need your help because there is nothing wrong with me.", I say thiredly. Michael just nods and writes something on the clip board. " Dean, I am going to meet up with you father now and after that if you want to, you can talk with him,", he says softly, pity glowing in his eyes.
"Yeah I'd like that", I say as my heart beat speeds up. What am I going to say to him. Would dad believe me. "No let's get you out of those", Michael says as he unwraps the restrains. I get up but too quickly. My vision get's spotty and I feel nauseous. I blinks my eyes rapidly hoping to get more clear headed.
I follow Michael out of the room and see him getting into his office where my dad already is. There is lump in my troath. Oh fuck my bladder is going to explode if I don't go to bathroom. Even though I'd love to eavesdrop the conversation between the pshyco mumbojambo analyser and my dad but I gotta take a leak.
Michael's POV
First I see when I go into my office is a large man standing in front of a chair. Behind him is a young boy, my best quess that it's Sam" Oh hey, you must be Mr. Winchester? And you Sam?", I say as I stumble with words. Somehow I feel small under his gaze. Mr. Winchester nods and I continue, "My name is Michael and as you know I am Deans psychiatric, it is pleasure to meet you both." He doesn't say anything so I just nod towards the chairs.
They sit down as I go around the table to sit on my chair. I don't know why but I feel nervous. "So you called me that you have something that we should talk about?", Winchester say's clearly irritated.
"Yes, yes I need you to be completely honest with me because what I am about to ask is really important which might help me to help Dean.", I say looking right at Mr, Winchester. I see with corner of my eye that Sam nods and Mr. Whinchester just says, "Sure."
"Have either of you ever noticed that Dean talks to someone who is not there?", I ask curiosity burning in me. Sam shakes he's head. So no for Sam. "No, why do you ask?", Mr. Winchester gruff's. When I look at Mr. Winchester I see clearly that he's been a marine. The way he holds himself screams it.
"Well Dean told me some interesting things that makes me think that he might have schizophrenia.", I say softly. I see that settle in. Sam look's at his father scared look in his face. Mr. Winchester is calm but I see him flinch but he contains himself quickly. "Things like what?", Winchester demands.
"He told me that he's been in Hell and that he has angel buddies.", I say carefully," And he says that you are dead and that Sam is dying." I waited the news to sink in. "Angels?", it's all Mr. Winchester managed out, "Are you sure because Dean might be joking?"
"Yes I'm pretty sure that he is not joking because what I got from his appearance is that he seems to believe that what he is telling.", I say."So Mr. Winchester do you go to church?".
"Me, Church?, No we've never gone to church", Mr. Winchester said. So they really are not religious. I clear my troath," So do you understand why I suspect that Dean might have schizophrenia?", I ask.
Mr. Winchester nod's, "Do you have more questions or can I see my son now?", Mr. Winchester asks coldly. "I have only one question and then you can see Dean", I say waiting for some kind of response but not getting one, "Is there a lot of mental illness on your family, aunt, uncles, grandparents?"
"No", Mr. Winchester states and gets up, " Let's go see Dean Sammy", he says softly but it was clearly an order. Sam gets up too and they wait me to lead them to Dean. I get up and go trough the door.
Dean's POV
I'm in the dayroom waiting to see my family. Why is it taking so long? What do I say to them. Calm down Dean, calm down. There is something wrong with me, I've never got this nervous before. It might be the teenage hormones though. I hear Michaels offices' door open. My heart jumps to my throat. I see Michael walk out with dad and Sam tailing him. I get up. Dad looks at me worry covering his features. Why is he worried? Dad's never been worried. Lump in my throat get's bigger. They take chairs and comes to sit in front of me so I sit back on the chair I was sitting when I was waiting them. Michael leaves and there we are the Winchester family. "Hey dad, Sammy", I greet them.
"Dean!", Sammy bursts out and hugs me. "Hey buddy!", I whisper. Sam sits back to the chair. "Why didn't you tell us Dean?", dad says voice cracking. What?, "Tell you what dad?", I say quietly.
"Why didn't you tell us that you see and hear things that aren't there? Angels?", Dad bursts out anger radiating off of him. Does he really think that I am crazy, delusional? "I know that what we hunt is pretty messed up and these folks would think we were all crazy Dean but angles? You thinking that I am dead?", dad says quietly so no one could hear us. "When did you start having these delusions?".
"Whoa dad no, you got it all wrong", I start," Dad, Sam you need to listen to me without interrupting me okay?", Sam nods immediately but dad hesitates." Please Dad listen me out", I plead. Dad nod's.
"So I know this sounds crazy but I'm from future, to be exact from year 2014.", I say. Dad looks like he wants to hit me." And in 2014 something happened that caused me to go back in this year.", I breath out.
Dad looks at me suspiciously and then says, " So in the year 2014 I'm dead?". "Yes", I whisper. "Dad I really need your help to get me back there. Sam is hurt and he is god knows where.". Dad shows mixed feeling and then says softly (which is weird cause mighty John Winchester has never spoken softly), "Dean do you realize how messed up that sounds?" The heart from my throat drops to my stomach, he doesn't believe me. He doesn't believe me.
"You don't believe me?", I say afraid. Dad was my only choice, now I have to figure this all out myself. Dad shrugs. "Dean those things are impossible"." Impossible? Dad we hunt monsters for living! It doesn't mean that something is impossible if it hasn't happened before", I shout maybe little too loud but like I care. My own father does not believe me.
"Sammy please believe me!" I plead looking Sammy straight into eyes. Sammy is so small. " Dean that is seriously impossible and in top of that you tried to kill yourself", Sam says with a small voice. So my own brother doesn't believe me. " I did not try to kill myself alright?, I got my wrists sliced up by a shapeshifter.", I say frustrated.
"Shapeshifter? Dean there were no shapeshifter there just you knife in your hand.", Dad tells me. Fuck, I had knife in my hand? I have no explanation to that. "No there were no shapeshifter in here I meant that there were shapeshifter in the year 2014!" I say voice pleading that they would understand. Dad just shakes his head, "I'm sorry son." He stands up and I hug him. Dad obviously doesn't know how to react cause Winchesters don't hug but couple seconds later he wraps his hands around me and kisses me on the forehead. "You can't leave me here Dad, you can't", I whimper. He doesn't say anything to me, he just motion Sam to get up and turns to leave.
I hug Sam too and as they leave I decide to shout something that I've rarely said, "I love you!". Dad stops on his tracks for a second and then continues walking, leaving Sam by his side.
All John Winchester could think that what was happening to his eldest son. He wanted to believe Dean but what he was telling was too much and too crazy to be true.
An hour has passed and it is time for a therapy session with my shrink yay. I sit in his office looking at my hands still sad that my own family didn't believe me. But I do what I usually do, I don't let it show.
Michael asked questions I answered, blah, blah, blah. At least now he thinks that I admit my 'delusions' as delusions. Now as Michael said, I am on a road of recovery. or not recovery but on a road of coping and living with my illness. Yeah gotta admit that I just wanted to bunch the guy couple of times.
So apparently I am not getting out in a week but in two weeks if everything goes well. Michael said that they just have to find me right pills to keep the delusions and hallucinations at bay. And after two weeks I can be released to the care of my father and I have to attend weekly therapy sessions. Fucking fantastic.
So my official diagnosis is indeed schizophrenia and depression. I wonder what dad thinks of me now. Even though in my time dad is already dead but still I feel agitated to earn his approval.
Two day has passed since I saw my family and I have been here, what four days? I have not seen visions about Sam. I have been high on meds which makes me scared that what if the meds really work and seeing Sammy in pain is just a delusion. But I decide not to go there. It is all real right? Of course it's real, 18 years worth of memories are not explained just with delusion and hallucinations. Get a grip Winchester.
I've tried to figure out how do I escape from here but all my plans have had a dead end. I haven't really tried them cause I know if I fail they are just going to lock me up for good. I can't risk that. So only change I got is to sit still and be a good boy for another week now. I can do it and I will.
7 days to go and I get 'home', actually dad told me yesterday when he and Sammy visited me that he rented an apartment and got a job. So we are staying still apparently for a while. Good thing is that Sam can finish his School year in one place but bad thing is that John Winchester hates staying still. But it kinda feels nice to know that dad really cares, even though he doesn't show it.
Day's pass with a same routine every day. I wake up then go to shower, eat breakfast alone, sit alone watching TV, go talking with Michael, sit alone watching TV, eat lunch, go to my room, group therapy, sit alone watching TV, therapy with Michael, dinner, chilling in my room, supper, I go to sleep. I have been trying to figure out how to get back in my time but with no out outside source I haven't had much success.
Michael thinks that I am nicely improving and it is good to know that he thinks that even, though I've been feeding bullshit to him these past two weeks. So yeah two weeks has gone by and dad will pick me up in two hours. I have regular clothes on and I am more than ready to go.
I walk nervously back and forth accidentally bumping into a boy. "Sorry", I mumble. I look up and see him looking at me. "So you'll going home", the boy asks. "Yup", I say with a pop. "Nice, have fun outside in the real world", the boy says as he starts to walk away. I will, I will.
"Mr. Winchester your father is here!", I get called at by a nurse. I hurriedly get up and follow the nurse. I see dad getting my medications and weekly program that I should follow. I say bye to Michael who is watching me leave. I follow dad to my baby. Oh my baby, long time no see. I hop in the shotgun and dad starts driving.
Sam is waiting us at the apartment making it Dean prove. When we arrive at to our destination. I see Sammy waiting us outside. He looks at as with excitement glowing in his eyes. Something flickers and there were Sammy was is now Sam. Freakishly tall Sam who looks dead on his feet. He has cast in his arm and looks pretty banged up. I feel relieved. Sam is not dead, he is not well but he is alive.
I stumble out of the car and walk towards Sam. I squeeze him in tight hug but he feels wrong. He feels small. "You are suffocating me", I hear Sam's voice peep. The flickering is back again and I realize that Sam is gone and Sammy's back. What in world is going on.
"Let's get you inside", I hear dad say. I follow them to the apartment feeling hollow.