A/N My apologies to all of my loyal readers and guests, for taking so long to update this story. Thanks for hanging in there! Thank you, also, all of you who take the time to review. It really means a lot.
Nate River: I hope Chapter 35 answered your question. Rest assured, there is more to come in that thread.
Laternenfisch: Yep! You got that right! Like Cap said in AoU to Thor: "You had to ask!"
On with the show. Please feed the bunnies!
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An alley just outside of Stark Tower…
Loki and Miss Sauer stepped out of nothing, the young woman still a little unsteady. Loki re-cast his illusions of invisibility and commonness.
"Doesh that get eashier with time?"
"With a half-century's practice, aye."
"I'll pass, thanks." She looked up at the service entrance and scowled, steeling herself. "Can we get some coffee?"
"Have you a modicum of exchange?"
"No, everything is in my apartment," she sighed, "confiscated by SHIELD, so it's gone for good. I'm the bag lady Clea pretended to be, drunk an' all, jusht with better clothes."
"Art neither a street urchin, nor a drunken wretch. You have friends here," Loki said sternly. "They will see to your needs."
Sauer looked at him curiously. "You're jealous," she said softly.
Loki twitched, startled, and opened his mouth to deny it. No words came out; the stitches held. Damn...
"Don't be," she murmured up at him. "Co-workers are not the same as friends."
"Your Avengers..."
"Geniuses, super-soldiers, spies, assassins? Really? You think we pal around? Watch shows together? Stay up late eating cold take-out? For a super-genius sorcerer, you can be a real idjit," she shook her head as he flushed in anger. "Does your palace have servants?"
"Verily."
"Are they your friends?"
Loki gave her a scathing look. The question was ludicrous.
"Exactly. I'm office machinery in this building, your lordship," she said bitterly. "My replashement was at my desk before I left. I bumped into 5 people on my way out; they wouldn't talk to me. Pish off Tony Stark and you're poison. The closest I have to friends are Phil and Clint, and we don't hang out: they're married men."
Loki held his peace as they approached the glass doors. How could anyone be lonely in a realm with 6 billion people?
His thoughts were quickly interrupted. The lower level of Stark Tower was filled with shops: coffee, food, office supplies, clothing, and a clinic. Sif walked out of one of them and grabbed 'Loki' by the arm. His walk-about illusion disappeared.
"You missed," Loki snapped, still invisible. "What do you want, Sif?"
"What deviltry is this, sorcerer? Where are you? Cease your tricks!"
"Shalt abide my glamour for a while, Sif, lest you wish a general panic."
"Where have you been?" she hissed. "Thor has been beside himself, fearing you in some dark working."
Sauer snorted.
"Typical," she groused. "Even the Ass-guardian doesn't see me, and I'm standing right here. She prefers the company of an invisible man to Earth office equipment."
"Self-pity flatters you not, Lady Sauer, but your point is valid," Loki murmured.
Sif turned a curious face to the young Earth girl sagging against the wall, and snorted.
"You went after the maid? Art reduced to shagging Fandral's besotted leftovers, now? Did you forget we have a battle to prepare..."
Sauer saw red. She snarled and punched Sif stiffly in the teeth, growling as her hand shattered on the Aesir's jaw.
"You bitch! Don't you dare call me a whore! If I ever get the chance to share a bed, you can be damn sure it isn't going to be with my uncle, you fucking hypocrite!"
Sif wiped her mouth and sneered. "Pain teaches better than words, so we say in Asgard," she huffed. "May your knuckles warn you 'gainst attacking your superiors, if you've no respect for your elders."
Sauer cradled her shattered right hand in her left, and leaned into Sif's face. "I would never hit Pepper, but a foul-mouthed, bitter old hag is fair game."
The raven-haired warrior smiled without humor. "You miss my point, mortal."
"Oh, no," Sauer hissed, "I took your point well enough."
Sif felt something sharp poke into her right side. She spared a glance down…
Sauer pressed the tip of Sif's own dagger to her side. The wretch had snatched it from her belt as she challenged the warrior to her face.
"Missing something?"
Sif tensed, but a loud, slow clapping interrupted her.
"Amusing as this is," Loki deadpanned, "cease. The maid," Loki emphasized the word, "must return to her people. You should as well, Sif, lest you were on an errand when you exited the building."
"Aye, I was," she said stiffly. "Some of us can be trusted off-leash."
"Pity Thor couldn't muzzle you as well," Sauer snapped.
"Peace, Lady Anne," Loki soothed, sounding pleased. "To the healer with you, and let Thor's mutt tend to her own business."
Sif glared daggers at them both. Her look changed to bewilderment as Sauer offered her dagger back, hilt first.
"I am neither a whore, nor a thief, Sif. Take it," the young woman said stiffly.
"Nay. 'Tis yours now by Aesir law. May it serve you better than it served me," Sif insisted, then turned on her heel and marched away.
"Hmmf," Sauer looked down at the dagger in her left hand. The Aesir's knife-small on Sif-was near a short sword in her hand. "What am I going to do with this?"
"Shalt fashion an appropriate scabbard, of course, and wear it on your belt," Loki shrugged, forgetting that Anne Sauer could not see him. "Shall we away?"
Sauer offered Loki the dagger's hilt. "Can you take this? I can't carry it and my arm, too."
Loki conjure-wrapped the dagger and secured it in Sauer's belt. "I have mine own to carry. Ne'er hand off a weapon newly bonded to you; 'tis bad seidr. How fare you?"
"I don't feel so good."
"In with you, then."
Sauer nodded, a little nauseous, and walked into Stark Tower. She headed for the walk-in clinic, but stopped in front of the main elevators, horror-struck.
She couldn't pay for treatment.
"Shit."
DING went the elevator. Charity Able, bleary-eyed and oblivious to Sauer's presence, blundered into her.
"Oh, god. I'm sorry. Excuse me, I…" Charity peered closer at Sauer's tear-streaked face and rapidly swelling arm. "Sauer? What the hell happened to you?"
/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\
Hawaii
"So, I got hit with this rogue wave, and the next thing I'm kicking for the surface and clawing sand at the same time." Skye regaled the group with her tale of ocean rescue. "I thought I was dead, you know? But then somebody grabbed me and pushed me to the surface. I saw a tail, at the time, but I thought it was just shock. My friend Kalo told me about Menehune."
"I wonder what kind of tail it had," Audrey murmured.
Skye shrugged. "I dunno. I was busy not-drowning at the time." She looked thoughtful. "Maybe I can look it up on Wikipedia later."
"Or you can jump in the ocean and ask around," Ward said dryly. "Ow!"
"No fighting, kids!"
"Yes, dad," Skye groused.
"Whatever happened to 'are we there yet' and 'how much longer'?" May murmured.
"Who was Kalo?" Ward asked, a little nicer.
"A friend," Sky shrugged. "We weren't dating or anything, not that he wasn't nice. I was a mixed child: not white enough for the whites, and not Polynesian enough for the natives. He was the first kid from school to be a friend, and he taught me to surf. I supplied him with Milk Duds for payment."
"You were an outcast because of your color?" Ward looked horrified. Fitz scowled and pinched his nose.
"Nae, she was an outcast because teenagers are dimwits, Ward," he explained. "Her skin was jest an excuse."
"That's sweet, Fitz. Thanks," Skye smiled at him, and the physicist blushed.
Ward scowled briefly. "I suppose you weren't a dimwit in high school, Fitz?"
"I ne'er went to secondary school, Ward. Skipped it an' went straight to university at 13, an' then on ta SHIELD training after."
"Of course you did."
"I didn't finish high school either, Ward," Skye volunteered.
"You didn't?"
"Nope. I dropped out and got my GED online."
"I can see you doing that," Ward nodded. "I finished high school in SHIELD Academy, after Garrett busted me out of reform school."
"Garrett busted you out of reform school?" Skye giggled. "No wonder you're so bad!"
"Our best security agents aren't usually Eagle Scouts," Coulson chuckled.
"Did anybody on this team graduate high school?" Skye asked curiously.
The Coulsons and May each raised a hand.
"Figures," Ward laughed. "Somebody has to guide this band of delinquents."
"Don' forget Simmons," Fitz cracked. "She was her school's valedictorian."
"At 15, no less," Phil Coulson nodded, twiddling the steering wheel.
"Phil, what is that up ahead?" Audrey pointed up the highway.
Phil Coulson frowned. "A roadblock."
/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\
Stark Tower
Charity took Sauer by her good elbow and hustled her into the Stark Tower All Access Clinic. "Call Miss Potts," she said crisply to the nurse at the receiving desk. "She'll want to talk to this patient."
"HIPPA Regulations prevent…"
"Iss ok," Sauer slurred. She was starting to look a little green. "Verbal conshent."
"Right," said the nurse. She frowned at Sauer's rapidly swelling hand. "Looks like a brawler's fracture, but we'll need an X-ray. Sit here while I get the doctor." She reached for a Starkpad. "I don't suppose you broke your off hand, did you?"
"Nope."
"JARVIS can auto-fill her information," Charity spoke up. "She's an employee."
"Ex-employee, shank you." Sauer leaned back so her head touched the wall. "JARVIS has probably purged all my information by now."
"And intoxicated," the nurse murmured something else the women could not hear, and tapped into her Starkpad. "I'll need to…"
"Let me see," Charity reached for the Starkpad. The nurse hesitated until Sauer nodded her assent. Charity tapped a few keys, humming. "Nope, you're good. You aren't even in here as 'terminated'. Looks like Potts changed your status to 'medical leave'." She frowned at the discolored, rapidly swelling hand as she handed the Pad back to the nurse. "So, what happened? You hit a brick wall or somepin?"
"Or something," Sauer groaned. She paused a moment. "Thanks, Char."
Charity shrugged and looked uncomfortable.
"I punched Sif."
Charity's eyes widened, scandalized. "You did what? Why?"
The brunette snorted. "She called me a drunk whore."
"No way!"
"Technically, Lady Sif accused me of 'shagging Fandral's besotted leftovers'," invisible Loki corrected, "but the accusation is correct."
"Who said that?" Charity jumped and looked around.
"Oh, intro," Sauer murmured. "His majesty, Pince Woki of Ashgard-currently inviserable sho he doesn't scare everyone here to death-Charity Able, the woman who replaced me...how long ago?"
"About three days."
"Huh. It only feels like two."
"Realm-walking shortens your time perspective, and hast done it twice," Loki informed the women. They could hear his displeasure. "How long do your healers take to respond?"
"Depends on how many patients they have," Charity shrugged. "She could be here for 2 or 3 hours before she saw a doctor." She glanced around, looking for evidence of an invisible God of Mischief. "Why would Prince Loki scare everybody to death? Everybody knows he changed color."
"He's 10 feet tall and getting bigger."
"Um. Right." Charity frowned. "Look, I should probably go upstairs and find Miss Potts…"
"No, Miss Able. I need you to secure Miss Sauer. We have not hours to wait for a healer, nor a week to wait for the bones to knit. I will set her bones," Loki said crisply.
"Broken bones take months to set," Charity protested. "Not a week!"
"All the more reason for me to act. Canst hold her still, and brace her so I may work?"
Charity gave Sauer a worried look.
"S'alright. Gimme something to bite, will you?"
A few moments later Sauer bit a towel, while Charity hugged her fiercely into the chair. The buxom secretary's eyes widened, even as Loki took Sauer's swollen hand into his large, cool one.
"He's going to become visible for this; he told me in my head," she murmured into Sauer's ear.
"Telepathic alien sorcerer," Sauer tried to say, but it came out: "Tlptc aleen srsrr."
"I'm sorry I was such a jerk."
"Mmfff?"
"I was jealous. You started at First Chair, and I'd been here a year already sucking up. I hated you for it. You had everything I wanted…"
"R oo ding o somtng?" Sauer gave Able a concerned look.
"Brace yourself," Loki commanded, and shimmered into view.
"Nope. Fandral fucked the hell out of me last night, and tonight he's taking me to Asgard for good," Charity confided, and squeezed.
Sauer's eyes bugged out. "Oo did whaAAAAIIIIEEEEEEE!" The last came out as a scream, as the bones in her hand snapped together CLIIIIIIIICK! Her head dropped onto Charity's shoulder as she sobbed.
"I thought I recognized his scent on you," Loki mused. He sent a warm pulse into the injured hand: a mild (for him) healing spell that enveloped both women. "My condolences: Fandral rarely keeps his courtesans for long."
Charity gaped up at the blue giant. "He promised…"
"Child," Loki tutted, giving her a piteous look, "dost really think I am the only liar in Asgard?" He paused long enough to magic a protective sheath around Sauer's injured hand. "Can you escort her upstairs? I should not use your lift."
The blond nodded mutely, and helped Sauer to her feet even as Loki disappeared again.
"Sauer?" Able asked hoarsely.
"Elevator," the woman rasped. "Privacy." She grabbed the towel she had been biting and washed her face with it, trying hard not to wretch. "At least, he could have left me drunk," she gasped.
Once inside, the trim brunette sagged into the far wall. Charity Able sat down beside her.
"Three days ago a psychotic alien ripped into my head, and Fandral's. We each saw everything there is to know about the other."
"Why are you telling me this?"
"I was always jealous of you, too, Char. You're pretty. People…men…they like you. They notice you. I can't have that. I know the Tower gossip…you're the Tower slut, and I'm the prude: the ugly duckling. Women here aren't treated like people with thoughts or feelings. It sucks. Fandral…he's a player…"
"So am I."
"But he doesn't break his word. If you get a chance to get off this rock…to have a life…take it, ok? Just do it."
The elevator had started. Charity stood up and hit the "STOP" button.
"Talk."
"He's 839 years old. His old man used a spell to seduce his mom-she was a dancer-and left her pregnant. She enspelled the local swordsmith into marrying her…"
"Can Fan-fan do magic?"
"Everybody on Asgard has some," Sauer nodded. "His wife…"
Charity blanched. "He's married?"
"No. He was. His wife died in childbirth about 700 years ago."
"The baby?"
"He died, too. Broke his heart. He swore that he would never end another woman with his child, nor abandon one the way his father had..."
"He never re-married."
"Nope."
"Sauer…Fan-Fan's first wife…was she…"
"Human? Yes."
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