A/N: A dagsslatta is a measurement of area, equal to about ¾ of an acre
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Stark Tower…the ruined conference room…
Pepper Potts, cultured CEO of Stark Industries, marched across the ruined floor and slapped Fandral the Dashing across the face. Twice.
Fandral blinked, surprised rather than hurt. Thor's mouth dropped open in consternation; Loki narrowed his eyes.
"Pepper!" Stark exclaimed. "What are you…"
"Miss Potts!" Charity Able protested, "why…"
Pepper grabbed Charity Able by one hand and dragged her away from Fandral. "Young lady, come away from that rogue at once", she ordered. She pushed the younger woman behind her and stepped into Fandral's face. "How dare you! Taking advantage of her like that! And now you would carry her off to…to…another world! With no thought for her family! Without any protection at all!"
"Miss Potts, I'm perfectly capable…" Able began, but shut up, eyes wide, when Pepper's flaming eyes turned on her.
"Be silent, girl. You will speak when spoken to!"
Stark twitched. "Pepper, can I have a word?"
"Not yet, Tony. Not until I'm done with him." She poked Fandral in the chest.
Fandral stared helplessly at Thor, who shrugged.
"What is your complaint, Lady Pepper?" Thor looked down at his hostess, puzzled. "I thought matters between you and Sir Fandral were settled."
"He used magic to seduce my secretary, took unseemly liberties, and now plans to take her to another world. I take issue with that!" Pepper did her best to look fierce, helped by her blazing eyes. "Her parents are dead, so she is under my protection! I'll not stand by and see her carried off like a cow!"
"Such conduct is not honorable," Diana snapped. She moved to stand next to Pepper, shielding Charity from Fandral's gaze. "Tis how slaves are made!"
"He has confessed his use of seidr to me already," Thor nodded, crossing his arms. "He sensed a mind-spell within her, and sought to break it."
"Has anyone informed the maid of her enchantment?" Diana asked sharply. "Tis unethical to treat someone so affected, without their knowledge and consent."
"What?" Charity said weakly. She peered around the women in front of her, at Fandral, but he did not make eye contact. He glared balefully at Sauer, instead.
"You knew about this?" Pepper poked Thor in the chest, outraged. "You knew about this and were complicit?!"
"I ne'er threatened to make her a slave!" Fandral protested.
"You ne'er offered to make her a wife, either!" Pepper roared.
"Pepper, calm down. Why is this a problem?" Tony put a hand on the small of her back, but whipped it away when her glowing eyes turned on him. "You and I have been together like that for years," he murmured. "What's the problem?"
Her eyes dimmed a bit. "You can't make me a slave, Tony," she explained. "It's illegal in our country. We're equals here."
"Well, yeah, but it's not like they have slavery in Asgard. I mean, really! C'mon, Goldilocks, tell her! You don't have slaves in Asgard, do you?" Tony sputtered to a halt at the look on Thor's face. "Wait. What? Seriously? You have slaves?"
"Aye, we do," Thor said gravely. "But why that ails Lady Pepper is beyond me. Fandral has not threatened your maid with slavery. What concerns you so?"
Pepper folded her arms and looked stubborn. "Fine: he hasn't threatened slavery. What has he offered her, besides an incredibly interesting sex life?"
"Nothing," Able finally squeaked. She looked at Fandral, wide-eyed. "I didn't think beyond that…"
"Obviously," Pepper huffed. "Rookie," she muttered. "So. You planned to take her to Asgard, and then what? You break a few beds, and go back to war, and what happens to the girl? Where will she live? Do you even own a house? Or do you live in a barracks? What is she supposed to do all day? Does she hang out in the palace with the rest of the royal…girlfriends?"
"Courtesans," Loki corrected. Pepper narrowed her eyes at him.
"What is a cour-te-san?" Able asked cautiously.
"A palace entertainer, companion, and occasional prostitute," Loki deadpanned. He crossed his own arms, lazed back against a wall, and watched Thor squirm.
"So, she goes to Asgard as Fandral's courtesan," Pepper began.
"He called me his 'consort'," Charity volunteered.
"Not a courtesan, then," Loki defined. "Courtesans are public property. She goes as his concubine."
"What is the difference between a concubine and a slave?" Pepper demanded.
"Legally: none," Loki nodded.
"So, just to be clear, your knight used magic to seduce my secretary, and has convinced both her and you," Pepper poked Thor in the chest," that he 'has' to take her to Asgard, as his property…"
"For magical treatment," Thor reminded her, "of a mind-spell prompting her towards evil."
"Is there a sorcerer in the house?" Sauer spat out.
Loki winked at her.
"We have an Aesir sorcerer here," Pepper snapped.
"Technically, I am Jotun," Loki corrected.
Pepper frowned. "Does your race make you impotent against mortal brainwashing?"
"I BEG YOUR PARDON!" Loki roared.
"So," Pepper turned back to Thor, "we have a potent sorcerer right here…"
"And one in Greenwich Village," Sauer added.
"We do?" Pepper asked, surprised.
"Strange," Sauer nodded. "He's a doctor."
"Doctor who?" Pepper asked.
"No, Doctor Strange," Sauer corrected.
"Most likely," Pepper nodded. She turned back to Thor. "So, we have at least two competent sorcerers right here. Miss Able does NOT need to be evacuated to Asgard for 'treatment', so Sir Fandral's benign offer is bogus. He wants her for himself." She glared at Fandral, who twitched and looked away. "Humans are little more than cattle to your people. She does not know the customs or the language. What would prevent him from selling off his love-slave if she, say, embarrasses him at court? How do I protect my girl?" Pepper barked.
"Were this Themyscira, we would start with his flogging," Diana volunteered, "to atone for her lost innocence."
Fandral snorted.
/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\
Able shook and turned away from Fandral. "I need to sit down."
Sauer grabbed her arm and dragged her from the conference room. She sat the girl down near Helen's desk and updated the other woman with a few words. Able started babbling, even as Helen patted her arm.
"Charity, it's ok. You can trust Miss Potts, right?" Helen soothed. "Take a deep breath."
"I don't know what to do…I didn't even think…"
"Start thinking, already! What do you want?"
The young woman's eyes glazed over for a moment. "I want Fandral…"
"You have to get out of bed soon or later, doncha? What are you going to do then? They don't have Starbucks or taxis or Macy's. Get your head out of your pussy and think!" Sauer thumped the girl on the forehead with her fingers.
"Breathe, girl! Remember your training! You're better than me at accounting," Helen pointed out, "and you're good with communications, too. What else can you do? What do you do when you're not at work?"
The confusion cleared from Able's face. "Oh!" She looked thoughtful. "I can cook pretty good, and I can dance…"
"What kind of dance?" Sauer was curious.
"Ballet. I had lessons when I was little…I can still shake it…and I do yoga now, so I'm flexible…"
"Do you speak any languages besides English?" Helen pressed.
"Of course! German and Italian."
"Good," Sauer nodded. "Can you defend yourself?"
"Sure. I took self-defense, and I can use a gun…"
"Kind of unusual for a New Yorker. What will the governor say?" Sauer teased.
"I'm originally from Wisconsin," she shrugged.
Sauer gave her a look. "You're a cheese-headed Packers fan?"
"Don't laugh, My Little Pony."
"Girls," Helen said, pinching the bridge of her nose. "Focus, please!" The bleary-faced blond looked up at Helen. "Remember: you trained for this world. Do you want to marry this guy? Go off to another planet and make fat babies for 50 years? Cook and clean and run a house without electricity or a vacuum or soap operas or take-out? Are you going to comply with everything he says, when you don't even know the rules?"
"I…"
"Wait," Sauer said. She looked around out of habit. "JARVIS, are you and Mjolnir still speaking to one another?"
"Mjolnir can talk?" Helen asked in a stage whisper.
"Electronically, yes," Sauer murmured, "but only to JARVIS."
"Yes, Miss Sauer," JARVIS answered. "Did you wish to direct an inquiry?"
"Yes, JARVIS. Can Mjolnir provide a list of an Asgardian married woman's legal rights and responsibilities, that Miss Able can read and understand?"
"Processing…"
/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\
"Fandral has been my sword-brother these past 4 centuries. He dwells within the Vallholl, in his own apartments," Thor explained, "and serves as one of my Father's advisers."
Pepper gave him a shrewd look. "So, you moved your landless friend into your Father's house, and in an incredible act of royal nepotism, got him a government job more suited to someone twice his age?" Immaculate hands came to rest on her hips, and Pepper Potts gave the god of thunder her best "Let's Make a Deal" face. "That's all well and good for traipsing around the galaxy chasing adventure, but it's no way to raise a family! Your friend has nothing to offer Miss Able other than a borrowed bed. I'll take care of her brainwashing, and Fandral can go back to chasing Aesir skirts."
Thor's eyes sparked; he was not a patient man. Clouds formed outside the tower windows, and in the distance, thunder rolled. Brow set, he glared down at the pale red-head who dared impugn his friend's honor and wealth, and over what? A serving wench! Steam began to rise from the corded muscles on his neck and shoulders, but Pepper Potts glared right back at him, unimpressed.
Loki stepped in, smoothly. "Brother, why don't we all have a seat? Lady Pepper merely looks out for her lady-in-waiting's welfare. Which, while commendable, goes a bit far."
Thor gave him a steaming glare. "What are you playing at, Loki?" He growled.
Loki gave him a knowing smile. "Which one of us out-maneuvered the horse trader at Bonn, and finalized the treaty with the Alfar at the Battle of Fey Peaks?" he murmured.
Thor shifted uncomfortably. "Right, then," he nodded, and grabbed a chair.
Loki waved a hand and the room's furniture righted itself and reassembled. A table appeared between him and Pepper, and he sat with a flourish at the chair that appeared behind him. He motioned grandly to the space opposite, and Pepper sat, eyes fixed with suspicion.
"As I said, Lady Pepper: your defense of your servant is commendable. Fandral did indeed take unfair advantage of her in his use of seidr." Thor coughed, and Loki gave him a sharp look. "Did your friend reveal the mind-spell to you before he used her for a night, or only after?
Thor withdrew.
"I thought as such. However, your concerns about Fandral's landlessness smacks of hypocrisy. The girl in question is only a message-bearer, not a titled heiress in her own right. A king's councilman is not someone taken lightly, nor is the general that eats and drinks at his table, as Fandral does."
"Councilmen fall in and out of favor with their kings; a general merely needs loose a skirmish to be banished from his leige's side," Diana pointed out. "Were he dismissed from his lord's estates, what trade has this rogue other than war?"
A sword clattered onto the table between Loki and Pepper, and the woman jumped in fright. Diana reached for her own blade with a shout, echoed by Sif, but Loki held up a hand and bellowed:
"HOLD!"
The assembly froze, except for Pepper, who shook and followed the sword's trajectory back to….Hogun. He bowed.
"My apologies, Lady," he said, bringing his hands together at his forehead. "Please, examine the blade. T'was made by my friend 200 years ago, and has ne'er failed me."
"Mine as well," Sif volunteered, unsheathing her blade. "He is skilled with hammer and tongs, as well as a blade. His craftsmanship rivals dwarf work."
Loki levitated Hogan's blade, spinning it slowly to examine the handiwork. He nodded appreciatively to Thor, and then floated it to Diana, who appraised it as well.
"I learned the craft from my father," Fandral volunteered, "as he learned it from his father, who served King Bor."
"Does your father yet live?" Diana challenged.
"Aye, he does. He labors to this day in the village of my birth."
"And your mother?" Pepper gave him a sharp look.
"Still raises my youngest siblings. They have been wed now just o'er 800 years."
"How many siblings?" Happy chimed in.
"Three brothers, two sisters," Fandral nodded.
"A common laborer raising six children will have little to offer in way of bride-price," Diana pointed out, even as she handed Hogun back his sword.
"Since the maid in question is impoverished by our standards, as well as mortal, the point is moot," Loki declared. "She has naught to offer a Chancellor of Asgard besides a few decades of romp. E'en if a child took, an' she were strong enough to bear, she would not live long enough to raise it."
Fandral looked stricken.
"How long is Aesir childhood?" Pepper asked sharply.
Loki shrugged. "Roughly 100 years."
Volstagg sidled over to his young friend. "Fandral," he murmured. "We separated after you wed Marian, centuries ago. What happened to her?"
Fandral gave his older friend a haunted look, and for a moment the giant redhead thought he would not answer.
"Fandral?"
"She died," he said abruptly, "in childbirth. My son was too large…and the midwife took my knife…" He passed a hand over his face. "She failed…cut him open instead…"
"Eire?" Volstagg asked, horrified.
"Wouldn't come. The All-Father did not approve of our marriage." Fandral's face grew cold. "She was only human, and no more belonged in Asgard than a goat did at a banquet. He said I should find sturdier women to tumble."
Volstagg clapped a hand on his friend's shoulder. "Fandral, I…"
"I always envied you and Hilda," Fandral rambled on, "you and your troop of children. I swore on my sword that I would not be the end o' another woman, after Marian. I cannae give any woman that, now, and …Lady Pepper is right. This suit is obscene, and must needs end…"
"Fandral," Volstagg motioned to Thor behind Fandral's back. "What did you do?"
/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\
"That…isn't so bad," Charity said, looking up from the documents JARVIS had provided. "I could live with that. Being a wife in Asgard won't be bad at all."
"Assuming he even wants to marry you," Sauer pointed out. "What's to say he wasn't into you just for the sex? It isn't like you gazed into each other's eyes and fell in love."
Charity snorted. "Who's to say I wanted that either? That mushy romantic crap doesn't exist. Fandral is amazing in bed and he offered me free passage off this rock. Yeah, so technically I have stock in a Wisconsin farm. You think I want to be the Dairy Queen? My cousin can have it."
JARVIS, please look up the business she just mentioned, and update Miss Potts, Sauer texted the AI with her new cell phone. It beeped.
As requested…the AI responded.
Charity began rambling about the political climate in the US, and Sauer's phone beeped again.
Please see me at once, Pepper's message said.
"Be right back, girls. The boss wants to see me. Charity, glad to see you stopped gawking like that idiot girl in the Twilight series."
Charity snorted. "Like all I need is a man. Please! I've had plenty. Like I was saying…"
"I'll talk to Miss Potts, and we can get some lunch. Get your coat, ok?"
"Sounds great."
/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\
Sauer walked back into the (now spotless) conference room and looked around. Pepper and the tall woman with long black hair (what was her name? Dinah? Deena? Diana, that was it) were squared off against Loki at one of the tables. Pepper had her 'serious business' face on, and Sauer wondered if Loki knew what he was up against. Pepper had used that face to make Justin Hammer cry. Loki didn't even glance at her as she walked in, not breaking eye contact with Pepper, at whom he smiled, just a bit. Thor had pulled Fandral and Volstagg off to a corner, were they spoke in (relatively) hushed tones, while Tony discussed something important with both Mr. Hoguns and Sif.
"Yes, Miss Potts?"
"We were just discussing a potential marriage contract between Miss Able and Sir Fandral. I hoped for an update on Miss Able's emotional state. How is she?"
"Charity? She has her head on straight. You can quit the negotiations; she isn't really interested in marrying Fandral, anyway."
Loki gave her a look and sat back. "Do tell," he said smoothly. His eyes told Sauer I know you're lying, but he said nothing else.
Sauer shrugged. "Charity admitted that Fandral has some skills in the bedroom, but other than that, he hasn't offered anything she doesn't already have. Her family has property back in Wisconsin."
Pepper tapped on her StarkPad. "And her interest is a controlling one. She is no pauper, even by Stark/Potts standards." She gave Loki a knowing look. "Her bride-price just went up."
"Don't worry, though," Sauer continued. "She's been dumped before; she'll rebound. She'll be fine without him."
I KNOW YOU'RE LYING, said Loki's eyes again, but his mouth said "That ends the negotiations, then. As retribution for illicit use of your maid, Fandral merely pays a fine in either property or service to House Potts…"
Sauer shrugged. "It's not like he can make her happy, anyway."
Fandral stepped out from behind Thor's bulk, turning red in the face. "WHAT?" he demanded.
Sauer whipped towards the swords-master, fists clenched, and scowled. "YOU HEARD ME, YOU FLY-BY-NIGHT KNIGHT! SHE'S FINE WITHOUT YOU! GIVE IT UP!"
"You know not with whom you deal, errand girl," Fandral growled.
"Tell that to someone who hasn't seen every single moment of your life! Charity wants more out of life than missionary position! She knows better than to expect roses and romance and happily-ever-afters, especially from an interstellar Casanova like you!"
"You dare…"
"What? Tell the truth? Damn straight! Maybe your sweet talk will land you a brainless honeypot back home, but it won't work here! Not with me and not with Charity! It isn't like you meant any of it, anyway! She knows it!"
"What have you done?"
Sauer snorted at him. "Don't act so concerned. We all know how you operate. You couldn't keep a woman if you tried! Charity's on her way out to drown her sorrow in furniture shopping. It seems somebody," she glared at him meaningfully, "broke every single piece she had before dumping her with false promises of moving worlds."
"I've ne'er broken faith in all my days!" Fandral roared back.
"You haven't made any vows to break! You're as much a heartbreaker as your sire, with even less honor!"
Fandral paled. Loki and Thor exchanged questioning looks. Fandral walked up to the young woman that defied him, and glared down into her narrowed eyes.
"I could strike you down right here, right now, and nobody could deny me the right, not even Thor," he said quietly.
"Better a quick death standing up for a friend, than to watch you crush her heart with your dick and say nothing," she answered softly. "I won't have a happy ending, but maybe Charity can."
Fandral looked down at the mousey-haired ex-secretary, puzzled.
"You want her to be happy?"
"Is that too much to ask? You'll face Thanos and monsters and death, but you're afraid to be a husband and a father?" She tugged at her bottom lip with her teeth. "Actually, you're right. The last 2 are scarier. If you screw up the former, all you do is die."
Fandral looked up from Sauer's face, towards the conference room door. She lay a hand on his arm and shook her head.
"It's better this way. Let her go, alright?"
He yanked his arm away from her as if burned, and scowled down at her again.
"I take no orders from you, wench," he growled, and stomped out of the room, bellowing for Charity.
Pepper was at her side in an instant. "Nicely done," she murmured.
Loki looked across the table at her and chuckled. "Of course, there's still a matter of property arrangements," he said smoothly. "Thor, do you not still own Leikager Keep?"
"My hunting cabin? Aye," Thor nodded. "18000 dagsslatta of woodland and 18000 more arable, with surrounding villages. It could use a good Baron," he said thoughtfully, "and closer supervision."
"They need a ceremony seen as legally binding in Asgard," Volstagg pointed out. "Fandral's first marriage did not have the All-Father's blessing."
"Thor," Pepper said smoothly, "aren't you heir to the throne of Asgard?"
"I am Crown Prince, aye," the blond giant nodded.
"And as Crown Prince, can you enact legally binding contracts?" Pepper continued.
"I have done so for many centuries, Lady Pepper," Thor nodded gravely.
"What danger is there that the All-Father would renege on a marriage contract you sealed?" she pressed.
"The All-Father can do so only if he convinces the Council of Elders that such action would be in the best interest of the realm," Loki answered for him. "Otherwise, the Crown Prince's powers of negotiation would be null."
"As I thought." She tapped on her Stark Pad. "How fast can you marry someone?"
Thor smiled.
/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\
A wave of Loki's hand put the Aesir in their dress uniforms.
A wave of Pepper's credit card brought an A-line wedding gown for Charity and bridesmaids dresses for Malick and Sauer. The women withdrew to Conference Room A to dress.
Sauer struggled into her sleek pink formal, and scowled at her reflection.
"What's the matter, Sauer?" Helen pressed. "You look great!"
"Bad things happen when I put on a dress," the young woman fretted.
Malick snorted. "You're being ridiculous. Relax. Sit down and I'll do your hair."
Diana, already fantastic in blue sparkles, looked craftily at Sauer. "You fear bad magic; I see it in you."
Sauer grunted as Helen tugged on her hair. She frowned at Diana and raised a hand, waggling it non-committally. "More like a long-standing jinx."
"Ignore her," Pepper advised. "She just isn't used to dressing up. I've heard worse from Tony."
Diana shook her head. "'Tis more than discomfort in finery. You fear evil. Why?"
The young woman shrugged. "Like I said: bad things happen when I put on a dress. They always have. The…crap…is going to hit the fan, and how am I supposed to fight in this? I'll trip over the hem!"
Diana leaned back and looked thoughtful. "Finish this phrase: to be feminine is to be…"
"Weak, objectified, and dismissed," Sauer snapped.
"Hmmf," Pepper said thoughtfully. "That explains a lot."
Sif tightened the cords on Charity's girdle. "I assume you have a sword?"
Charity looked around at her, puzzled. "Why do I need a sword?"
"To give to your husband, of course! 'Tis our custom for the couple to exchange swords. It represents the military ties between clans."
The bride looked troubled.
"Maybe I can help," Sauer offered, and stepped out of the room.
/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\
Happy dragged Tony off to stuff him into a tuxedo.
"Yer givin' the bride away," Happy told him. "Ya needs ta look the part."
Stark compensated by stuffing Happy into a tuxedo. "It's a wedding, Happy. You have to look sharp for the women."
"What about Dr. Banner? He's still out cold!"
"All the easier, Happy. Besides, he'd be upset if he missed the party." He paused a moment. "JARVIS, what kind of liquor is served at Norse weddings?"
"Mjolnir suggests Honey Mead, sir. Shall I have a few casks sent up?"
"Damn. Conference Room B is set up for the wedding, and C is barely in one piece," Tony muttered. "Where are we going to have the reception?"
"Ain't the basement set up for my going away party, Tony?"
"Yeah, but…"
"But nothin'. A party is a party. Lots of food and great hooch. Let's see if dese Asgardians can dance, alright?"
"And people say I'm a genius."
"Cummerbund," Happy fastened the garment, and Tony grabbed his coat. "Now all we needs is cake."
"Uh, oh…JARVIS?"
"Scanning, sir."
/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\
"T'was before we met, Thor," Fandral sighed. "I was naught but a landless fortune-seeker on Midgard, and I fell into a civil conflict in England. I gained everything: a name, property and a wife, as Volstagg told you, but lost it all when Marian and our son died. My seed," he spread his hands in front of his hips, "was her end, and her end was his, torn carelessly from her body before his time, an' butchered like a rabbit." His voice grew hoarse with the memory. "I buried Marian and our boy. I killed the midwife in my rage, and those who sought to avenge her, like sheep. I burned down their village, reduced my keep to rubble, and my friends…John, and Will, and Tuck the friar..." He swallowed. "I became a landless wanderer again, alone, for I would suffer none to accompany me." His face took on a haunted look. "I went mad for a time, and ne'er thought to see Asgard again. I had no wish to see another woman suffer because o' my appetites, but would not take monks' vows. Instead I took my knife…"
"You gelded yourself?"
"Aye, I did. Now I may sport with Asgard's finest, and not ruin her with a bastard, as my sire did to my mother, nor kill a mortal with my child tangled in her guts."
"All this time…I can scarce believe it. How have you hidden this from me?" Thor was aghast, then darkened in anger. "In my hearing you have named Loki-my brother-'ergi' and 'hommi', though you owe him a life! Were he of a mind to press charges, he could have dueled you publicly, or put you in chains for the slight!"
"He was Slepneir's dam!"
"To protect Asgard, he became a mare. To spare your feelings, you flee fatherhood! These are the actions of a coward, not a warrior of Asgard!" Thor's eyes began to glow. "At Loki's word, and as your prince, I give you Leikager Keep as a Barony. You have proved yourself able to rule it, and I trust no-one else better with its populace. Volstagg! Hold this rogue!"
"Thor, what do you…" Fandral began, but sputtered when Volstagg grabbed him securely from behind. "THOR!"
"As your sword-brother," his eyes glowed as his voice dropped to a low growl, "I give you my blessing. A Keep with no children is not a home!" Thor placed his left hand on Fandral's forehead, and his right ungently grabbed his crotch. "Blessed be!"
/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\
"What was all that about?" Loki mused from across the room, as he straightened part of Hogun's dress-armor.
"Your majesty," Sauer beseeched him, "we have a problem."
"Naturally," Loki said dryly, "we've been apart for less than an hour." He took in her attire with a glance and nodded approvingly. "Quite becoming. Much better than the man's wear you had on earlier."
She had the grace to blush. "Sif said the bride needs a sword…"
"To present to her groom, aye," Hogun nodded.
"I have one she can use, but…"
"But?" Loki raised an eyebrow at the girl.
"Getting it is kind of tricky."
"Define 'tricky'." Loki folded his arms and gave her a do you know who you're talking to look.
"Knowing Director Fury? It's been removed from my apartment and transferred to a storage facility in the Triskelion. That's in Washington D.C, nearly 250 miles away. Artifact storage facilities have electronic locks that require a specific code-key; they're monitored by laser sensors and security cameras, and patrolled by armed guards. Furthermore, artifacts are stored en masse, in identical green plastic tubs. Without a quartermaster's guide and pass-key, it could take a year to find one item with a manual search," she finished.
"What does it look like?"
Sauer described the plain adamantium-carbide blade, and the Dark Prince nodded.
"I remember the object from your memory. What time is it?"
She glanced around at a clock. "Ummm, about 2: 45, why?"
She turned around again, but the Dark Prince was gone.