Chapter 26

Ste's point of view

I'm in price slice picking up random bits and bobs, I'm still a bit thrown about Warren coming back from the dead and all that as I feel someone tap be on the shoulder, I turn to see Tony grinning proudly with his arm around a teenager,

"Ste just the man I was looking for!" He exclaims, "I'd like you to meet my son, Harry. He's here for the opening of my new restaurant, I hope you'll be making an appearance?" He asks weakly,

I recover shortly with everything that's been going on I completely forgot about it, "Alright?" I offer to Tony's son quickly taking in his appearance before I turn my attention back to Tony, "Course I'll be there what kind of person would I be if I skipped on my mentors big night?"

We both share a laugh as I refer back to the days when I was a scally and Tony had taken me under his wing, still to this day we are close and I'm always going to be grateful towards him for everything he had done to help me in the past.

"Well I'm glad, complementary champagne of course." He grins, "Well we better go lots of things to get done haven't we?" He waves while steering Harry away,

I was considering telling him about Warrens resurrection but decided against it knowing I'm best not getting involved and spreading it through the village, the last thing I need is to be on Warrens bad side.

As I make my way over to the deli I see Doug pacing back and forward nearly burning a hole into the floor with the speed of it, he looks relieved when I walk through the door,

"Thank god Ste! I'm glad I caught you before.. Well before my parents come here." He stares at me waiting for a reply,

Great this is all anyone needs, Doug's parents and myself had the most strained of relationships at best so I can't imagine how it's going to be now with the break up but hopefully with Doug's wedding coming up they'll be looking forward to that too much to even pay any attention to me.

"They'll be steering clear of the deli though won't they?" I ask hopefully,

"Well yeah but they're landing soon and they'll be here to see me after they've checked into the hotel."

"Maybe I should go.." I offer but he shakes his head,

"No Ste it'll be fine, your going to have to see them at some point they're going to be around for a while."

I try to resist the eye roll that comes but it's involuntary, "Okay but please do me a favour and try keep the conversation between us minimal, they already hated me before I hate to think what they think now." I grunt, they always blamed me that Doug would never meet a nice girl and get married before making them grandparents, not that they were homophobic, they would've just preferred that I hadn't came into Doug's life and made him question who he was.

"I'll try my best I promise." He laughs, "Anyway they aren't your evil in laws anymore, John Paul will be getting it full force."

I can't help the small part of me that is triumphant over that, John Paul needing to be connected to them for the rest of their lives. The rest of the morning passes without any hitches thankfully and Doug's parents don't turn up,

"Maybe they were delayed?" I offer him, "Why don't ya phone them?"

He nods before pulling his phone out and leaning against the counter, he's blabbing away on the phone and I zone out and keep myself busy with serving customers,

"They're tired after the jet lag." He tells me coming back out the front, "Ended up checking in and having a nap, the four of us will go out for dinner instead."

"Yeah that flight must knacker them." I tell him tightly, feeling uncomfortable talking about his mum and dad even just small talk about them.

"It's Tony's opening night tonight, will you be going?" He asks me and I can tell where this is leading,

"Course I'll be goin." I say plainly while facing away from him,

"Oh well we might pop in there for dinner."

I can't help but wonder if Doug is deliberately trying to make things difficult but then I quickly shake that idea out my mind Doug is too soft to think of putting someone in a uncomfortable position deliberately.

We carry on with idle chit chat for the rest of the day inbetween serving customers, before I know it it's time to close up,

"Another day closer to the wedding." I grin reminding him as though he could forget.

I can see there's uncertainty in his expression, "Your not having second thoughts again are ya?"

He shakes his head, "I'm allowed to be a bit sceptical aren't I? This is for life?" He still looks unsure though,

"Yeah but c'mon Doug. Ya don't do anything in half measures, I know ya."

"I suppose." He offers before shrugging, "Just hasn't hut home just yet."

I take him in for a minute before deciding against interfering, if he wanted my help or advice he would ask me for it, we say goodbye to each other before I send Brendan a text to see if he wants to meet up in Tony's restaurant for a while with Declan.

He agrees and we set a time to meet up at the Hutch, I go home and quickly get myself ready before giving Amy a phone to make sure her and the kids are still coming tomorrow after chatting to both the kids for a bit I let them go when Amy shouts that dinners ready.

I recheck my appearance in the mirror before heading out the door and making my way to the restaurant, we haven't had somewhere like this in the village since Tony's old place went bankrupt and he had to start working somewhere in town. When I had lost my job in his place and had a few jobs here and there before me and Doug got together.

He sure did go full out with the opening there's balloons and banners outside, I can imagine it was Diane that pushed for it.

"As promised." Tony grins, offering me a flute of champagne, "Just like old times isn't it?"

"Yeah it is." I nod while taking a sip, "only now we're neighbours instead of ya bossing me about."

He grins, "I always took it easy on you Ste."

"Yeah right." I laugh before someone else calls for Tony's attention and he excuses himself promising to catch up later.

I look around at all the faces, Sinead, Diane and Harry off in one corner chatting away I give them a wave knowing I probably won't get the chance to speak with them the full night since they'll be busy, the Osborne's are out in full force aswell as the McQueen's, Myra looks as though she's just died and gone to heaven with the amount of free food that's on sample, Cheryl, Lyndsey and Nate are stood beside the Savages as they all chat away about something or the other.

I make my way over deciding I'm best talking to them till Brendan makes an appearance,

"Oh Ste love!" Cheryl exclaims when she sees me heading over quickly wrapping her arms around me and grinning, "I hear ye made quite the impression on our Deccy."

"Is that right?" I ask, although I had gotten along great with Declan I'm a bit taken back by Cheryl speaking so highly of it,

"Yeah babe, it's great really how it's worked out." She grins clinking our glasses together, "My brother has definitely changed since he met ye, he seems happier and.. lighter." She scrunches her face up at the last part,

She goes back over to Nate and he wraps his arm around her while we all talk amongst each other until Cheryl's face looks like it's about to split in two, I already know who's going to be heading over to us before I even look and I'm pretty sure my face could give Cheryl's a run for its money,

Brendan and Declan walk towards us and Sinead offers them both a flute, Declan looks at Brendan asking for permission before he gives a grin and nod of his head in approval,

By the look on Declan's face you would think he was on top of the world as he makes his way towards us a few steps infront of Brendan and gives Cheryl and Lyndsey a small peck on the cheek and gives Nate a nod of acknowledgement before he grins at me, "Alright Ste? This is pretty cool isn't it?" He says looking around and holding his glass up,

"Yeah, mint." I grin in agreement but I'm pulled from the conversation as Brendan's arm wraps around my waist pulling me into his side and I easily mold against him before he paces a soft kiss on my head,

"Good day?" He asks in his Irish drawl that I'm pretty sure I'll never get sick of hearing,

"Yeah not bad, you?" I ask, we're in our own wee bubble, the rest of our crowd is chatting away to each other while we catch up,

"Yeah good, though I think Deccy wants to play a game of footy with ye at some point, seems like his old man isn't cutting it anymore." His eyes are alive with something I can't quite place,

I grin while rolling my eyes, "Can't help it that I have more stamina that ya, taking in your old age anyway."

"Ye weren't saying that last night were ye Steven." He husks in the shell of my ear and I feel my full body go bright red as I get flashes of the night before, "Plus I'm only thirty five." He says shiftily while looking anywhere but at me, it seems that even though I was joking he can still be insecure about these things no matter what way he carries himself.

"Just aswell I like the more experienced in life then." I murmur back keeping my voice low,

"Don't tell me this is yer way of saying ye leaving me for an older man." He keeps his face serious but I can see the playfulness in his eyes before he looks around, "It's Jack isn't it?"

I burst out laughing at that knowing he's getting ahead of himself with this joke, but he shares a smile with me and before we can continue the conversation were interrupted.

"Well look what we have here." I tense at that voice, couldn't forget it no matter how much I tried, "Look who it is Herb." I hear Connie as she refers to her husband.

Although I had never gotten along with either of them Herb was always a bit more civil with me or at least he tried to be. In a way I felt bad for him, it was very clear to anyone that Connie made the rules in that relationship.

"Connie, Herb." I comment, seeing them both stood with Doug and John Paul,

"I didn't realise you were still here, thought you would've drifted onto some other sap by now." She says before looking at Brendan stood beside me, his arm tightens almost protectively around me, "But I guess you have?"

"Mom, look there's appetisers!" I hear Doug attempting to try change the subject but it doesn't work, Connie's clearly on some sort of mission today,

Her eyes look around the faces of the people that are with me before looking back at Brendan, "He's one for the watching you know." She tells him referring to me her face scrunching in disgust,

Before I can defend myself Brendan's already half standing infront of me, "Ye want to repeat whatever ye were insinuating there?" He grunts,

"I think you heard me. A word to the wise let's say." She grins slightly, "Only a fool would associate with someone like him."

"I think ye've mistaken me for someone that gives a shit for what ye have got to say." I hear him mutter in his own tone of disgust,

But then Cheryl's barging by and standing at the other side of me clearly a bit tipsy, "Listen love I don't know what your trying to say but our Ste is one of the kindest most loving people I've ever met. How dare ye speak to him like that."

My heart swells at them both for sticking up for me as Connie tuts and rolls her eyes before linking arms with Herb and heading as far away from us as they can.

"Ste I'm sorry." Doug says guilt lacing his features,

"Don't be daft Doug, I know what she can be like."

"Yeah you got that right." I hear John Paul mutter getting him a scowl from Doug before his name gets screeched from Connie as they both make there way over I turn back to Brendan giving his arm a tight squeeze,

"Sorry about that." I say softly before looking at Declan who's grinning as always, Nate is looking away minding his own business and Lyndsey has drifted off with one of the Savages talking to another crowd in the middle of the room.

"Not to worry babe." Cheryl says squeezing my shoulder making her way back to Nate's side,

"Thanks for that ya know yous didn't have to do that." I say to Cheryl before looking at Brendan.

"As if we were going to let someone talk down to ye like that." Brendan answers,

"It's kind of nice seeing da' like this with someone.. Well other than me and Cheryl." He grins, "I suppose it's different with you two though."

Brendan shoves him playfully on the shoulder before pointing to his champagne, "That's yer last, clearly gone to your head already." He grunts but I can see the light blush on his cheeks and when I turn back to Declan he's grinning openly.

The rest of the night does by quickly, with loads of laughs and just an overall great time. I try to think of a time when my life was better than this but I can't, everything just feels right the now the only thing that's missing is Leah and Lucas not being here in this moment but I know I'll see them tomorrow.

Tony's smiling with pride while he gets his picture taken with his family and then his staff. I tell Brendan that I'll be back soon as I go to have a quick chat with Tony congratulating him and having a small conversation and a laugh before I make my way back to our table. By now Lyndsey has already left and Cheryl and Nate are discussing heading back to Nate's.

"Ye coming back to ours Ste?" Declan asks,

I look toward Brendan waiting for him to answer, "Actually I'm heading to the club after this to check on things.." He deliberates with himself before continuing, "How about the both of ye's head round the now and I'll be home soon?"

I'm taken back again with Brendan, only a couple of weeks ago we had gotten into an argument about him not telling Declan about us and now we're here, I know it's a big deal to him, trusting me with his son even if he is nearly an adult and it's only going to be for a little while I know it wouldn't be easy for him.

We're standing outside about to go our separate ways after making sure Nate and Cheryl got their taxi okay,

I hear the door open behind us and I already know who it is without even looking,

"We still have a conversation to finish." I hear her high pitched voice from behind me, "I had always wondered what my son saw in you but now he's with John Paul McQueen, I realise he just has very bad taste." She slurs, I have only met the woman more than a handful of times and even though she wasn't the nicest of people she had always kept herself controlled, tonight that wasn't the case though.

"It's so typical of you making a mess of someone's life then swanning off, well not this time do you realise how much you hurt my boy?" She rants on before I manage to find my voice to answer her back,

"I'm sorry Connie, I'm sorry that I messed up Doug's life by making him see who he is, and I'm sorry we weren't right for each other but we weren't in a long term relationship we've both moved on I don't get why you keep bringing this up." I say firmly as I stand full on facing her,

She scowls at me before marching closer, a bit unsteady on her feet, "Because I want everyone to see you for what you are! Doug might be happy to pretend you did nothing wrong and let you play happy families with your new man but I won't let you make a fool out of him!" She shouts hysterically,

"I've heard enough of this back off now." Brendan interrupts, standing infront of me and I can make out Declan's warning to his dad.

Connie seems shocked that he would get involved, "Don't you dare talk to me like that." She scolds.

"I'll talk to ye whatever way I see fit. That boy over there isn't someone ye can just talk to like there a bit of shit on yer shoe." He says back and part of my heart swells again because he's standing up for me, the more stubborn part wants him to back off and let me deal with this myself,

"That's exactly what he is." Connie screeches,

"No ye are." Brendan corrects, "Pinning after Steven more than your own son even is."

"Brendan come on just leave it." I say while pulling at his sleeve can tell this is about to escalate but it doesn't do much good,

"No she needs to be put in her place." He grunts while shaking my arm off him and keeping his focus on her. "Ye need to get a grip and stop harassing Steven, or so help me.."

Declan tries to intervene now, "Da, move." He says while pulling at him,

"Did you just threaten me?!" Connie shouts gobsmaked

"No he didn't, sure ya didn't Bren?" I say plastering on a face smile trying to defuse the situation,

"I may be old in age but my ears aren't painted on." She says her face still in shock, "I came as a friendly warning but I actually think you both might deserve each other." She hisses before shaking her head and making her way back inside.

None of us know how to break the tension and my eyes shift between Brendan and Declan before Brendan shakes his head and runs his hand over his face,

"I better get to the club, I'll see ye's when I'm home." He says while patting Declan on the arm and giving me a soft smile before he's retreating back to the club,

"Is it always this dramatic here?" Declan asks before we both start heading home,

I laugh at that, "Yeah it is a bit mental." I sigh, "Connie's just.. She's always been a bit like that."

"Even when you and Doug were together?"

"Especially when we were together." I laugh,

"Yeah I can't picture the both of yous like that." He laughs, "guess I just see you with my da. Would be weird if you were with anyone else."

"Yeah I think your dad was right about that champagne ya know?" I grin, knowing full well he had more than just the one.

"No but what I'm trying to say is, well I'm glad." He gives me a truthful smile, "I can see how happy you both are together, I've never seen him like that before."

I'm starting to hear that more and more now and I can't help but beam at the compliment, "Yeah well the feelings mutual."

"So you aren't planning on leaving my dad are you? It's just I know he's full on and he's not the easiest to talk to?" He offers,

"Don't be mad Dec, there's nothing about your dad that I would change." I reassure him,

"Good because I don't even want to imagine what he would be like without you now that I've seen the way he is with you." He smiles, "He really loves you."

It's only then that I start to feel uncomfortable not knowing how the conversation took this turn, "Well as I said the feelings mutual."

He grins and the conversation flows to something light again as we climb the stairs to Brendan's, when we get in I realise how weird it feels to be here without Brendan or Cheryl. One or the other has always been here any other time.

We settle infront of the tv watching some crappy programme, I send Doug a quick text to make sure everything's okay, he apologises again before telling me he'd fill me in when he sees me tomorrow.

Declan and myself chit chat about nothing really till Brendan comes in, he sees us both and a relaxed smile filters across his face,

"Everything alright at the club?" I ask,

"Yeah all is good, what ye's watching?" He asks,

I shrug my shoulders before Declan stands up stretching, "Well I'm going to head up to bed, I'll see yous in the morning?" He questions looking at me while I guiltily look away, the past few mornings I've snuck out early before Declan's been up trying to avoid any awkwardness, more for Brendan's sake.

When we're left just the two of us I decide to approach the elephant in the room,

"Look about what Connie said.." I trail off not knowing how to finish that sentence, "She's just a bit like that Bren, ya shouldn't get all worked up like that."

He looks shocked at first, "Ye angry with me?" He asks looking away cocking his head,

"No." I say quickly while shaking my head, "How could I be, ya stuck up for me I've never had anyone do that for me before." I assure him by lightly squeezing my hand with his, "Both you and Cheryl stood up for me, thank you." I say truthfully,

Even though at the time yeah I was annoyed that he wouldn't let me fight my own battles as if I wasn't capable of doing it myself but then I realised I couldn't be mad at him when I would be the same if it was the other way around.

"I love ya." I say truthfully, we aren't one of they couples that say it all the time but it makes it even more meaningful when we do, even now I get all sweaty and nervous before I tell him.

Brendan's Point of view

I still never tire of hearing Steven tell me he loves me, as I pull him towards me giving him a soft, slow kiss before pulling away slightly and saying it back to him, he smiles and pulls me back to him, on any other night we would stay here and pleasure each other or I would even carry him through to the room but for a change tonight for some reason I feel like opening myself up to him.

Might be that this time of year always brings out these feelings, as the days get closer to that marked date, so I pull away.

"I haven't always been good ye know." I tell him kiss him again before I can stop myself, "I was terrible actually."

"What back when ya knew Mecca?" He quizzes, I know he's always wondered about it but he's never pushed for any details and I'm glad.

I nod before carrying on, "He wasn't the only one, there were others.." I trail off,

"Ya used to beat them too?" He frowns at me,

I can't bring myself to look into his eyes as I nod,

"Why did ya do it?" He asks, "Was it cause of your dad?"

I had never gone into much detail about him to Steven, he didn't need to know about the monster from my past. He knows the ins and outs, between late night conversations and he probably got a bit of a glimmer into how I felt about my da that day in Dublin at his old pub.

We sit in silence before it becomes too much, "It was the voice id get in my head." I tell him, if I think about it hard enough I know that voice is still there somewhere, "Everytime they touched me or even looked at me the wrong way I'd hear the names in my head. Queer, poof.. Fairy."

I look towards Steven and see he's already looking at me, he gives me a soft smile letting me know I can carry on, "It was like a reflex, sometimes I knew what I was doing other times it would just happen. In the blink of an eye, before I could even think about it." I let out a deep breath, "I was still in denial at that point, thought Cheryl would disown me if she had found out. I had Eileen and the kids, I wouldn't be good for them if I was queer."

"Brendan.." Steven says softly but when I'm talking like this it's like I'm in a trance and I can't stop,

"Even after I got caught with Macca, even after we divorced I was still the same. She pitied me ye know, didn't understand how someone could hate them self so much." I move to go pour myself and Steven a whiskey before sitting back beside him, "Cheryl found out but she never mentioned it, not to me and definitely not to our da. Until he died she brought it up after that, when we were at counselling."

I look to Steven and he's nervously tapping on his glass but I can tell he's still listening, "She didn't know the extent of my denial, Eileen had told her about me being gay but she kept everything else a secret. She only told Cheryl that I hated myself for it. I don't really know what got said but they must've came to an agreement." I drain my whiskey before continuing, "There was nothing wrong with they lads before, it was all in my mind, I had it drummed into me as a kid."

"How could he do that Bren?" He asks me sadly, "He couldn't have known ya were gay, but he made you hate yourself that much."

"I don't know Steven." I grunt, "but I want ye to know these things, I don't want my past coming between us so I have to be honest."

"Nothing will come between us." He promises and I can't help but believe him as he leans over to sit his glass on the coffee table, "Come on I think that's enough truths for one night, let's get to bed."

I nod as I take his offered hand and he pulls me into bed, we undress before I pull him against me and we get into a comfortable position for sleep, his legs tangle with mine while my chest is pressed against his back and my arms wrap around him while I take a smell of his hair and let the scent drift me off to sleep.

It's dark and I hear a ticking noise, the same nose that I always hear, a cross between a grandfather clock ticking and a leaky tap dripping. The smell of dampness and dread hits my nostrils as I follow towards the noise at the end of the hall. It's the same dream that I always get and no matter what I do I can never stop myself from walking to the same door, taking in the surroundings of the peeling wallpaper and rotting underneath. My breath hitches as I reach the doorway preparing for what I'm about to see, the creak of the floorboards as I get closer and the screeching of the rusted door handle as I pull it down..

I'm shaken awake before the rest of the dream plays out but I know how it goes.

"Your okay." I hear a whisper as I'm brought out of the nightmare, "Brendan?" I hear Steven croak as he shakes me again,

"Yeah?" I ask back quietly,

"Are ya alright?" He asks, "ya kept twitching, Bren your soaked with sweat."

"I'm fine." I huff as I pull myself out of the vest and get rid of the boxers before I settle back beside him pulling him to me again, "It was just a dream."

I can feel his piercing worried gaze on me and I try to reassure him with a smile and a quick kiss, it seems to do the job because he starts to loll back off to sleep again.

It's been months since I had that dream, always the same beginning but different scenarios, different people are always involved, there's only one face that never changes. I try to fight myself from falling back to sleep but at least this time when I do, it's a peaceful one

AN:

so yeah as you can tell it's about to take a slightly darker turn, I made loads of nice fluffy moments in this because there's going to be a few dilemmas coming up so they probably won't be getting as much of these moments