Act XIV: Back to the Future

"Hey, Jeanne, do you think the Bayonetta timeline is fucked up?"

"Hell yes!"

"Let us fuck up another story with our dimension and time travel shit?"

"HELL FUCKING YES!"

Bayonetta and Jeanne were driving up Akina in the 1960s.

"We're gonna meet ourselves there to know what preparations we'll need to make." Bayonetta from the present time said. "Then we'll setup the race. I'm also gonna go distract the Marty we seen today so hopefully he won't make any preparations. Remember, if he meets himself, he's gonna pass out. If we meet ourselves we don't give a shit as all of the verions we'll meet know what's going on."

They saw two witches standing near the road.

"Here they are." Present-time Jeanne said.

"Here they are. Lol." Information-providing Jeanne said.

"Should we go have a meal at McDonalds together? I remember it was delicious." Information-providing Bayonetta said.

"Shit! They are fucking with us." Present-time Bayonetta said.

"Remember, don't fuck with witches."

"Remember, don't fuck with witches." Both Bayonettas said at the same time.

"Fuck you!" Present-time Bayonetta said.

"Do you want the information or not?" Information-providing Jeanne asked.

"You're gonna win the DeLorean race! Let's go celebrate at McDonalds." Information-providing Bayonetta said.

"Fuck, you spoiled the whole thing." Present-time Jeanne said.

"You'll have to do everything we have done, though. So funny. We've already through this stuff and you're at the beginning." Information-providing Jeanne said.

The four witches raced to McDonalds. The withes from the future knew they'll win as they knew all the trajectories and mistakes the present-time versions would make.

The witches were eating at McDonalds. They ate in Purgatorio.

"We don't wanna scare the people, right?" They all agreed.

"You know, it's almost like if I make a wrong step, you won't exist." Present-time Bayonetta mentioned.

"Nope, you have no choice. You can see us only because we did all the same stuff." Information-providing Bayonetta explained.

"I can spill this tea!" Present-time Jeanne said.

"Yeah, it won't change anything." Information-providing Bayonetta explained once again. "You won't spill it, by the way."

"Such an illusion of choice." Present-time Bayonetta mentioned.

"So, Marty will try to win by going back to the past at the finish line. This is the only strategy he's going to use. That only applies if Bayonetta will be able to keep him from preparing other strategies. You know what I mean." Information-providing Jeanne said.

"Okay, we're off then!" Present-time witches said and got into the car.

"Hey, Bayonetta, I feel like playng the information-providing Jeanne."

"What?"

"Leave me at the place where we first met ourselves 30 minutes before now! I'll meet you later... Sometime."

The witches arrived at Akina 30 minutes before and met the information-providing Bayonetta again.

"Hey, wanna leave Jeanne? Don't worry. I'll give her back later." Information-providing Bayonetta said.

"What if I don't want to?" Present-time Bayonetta asked.

"You've no choice." Information-providing Bayonetta said.

"Ahh, fuck it, you can have her." Present-time Bayonetta said.

Present-time Jeanne was left with the information-providing Bayonetta and the present-time Bayonetta went to distract Marty from coming up with a plan.

"Bayonetta? What the hell?"

"Your brother forgot how to brake."

"Keisuke, you're so much fun!" Before-the-race Jeanne's scream was so familiar.

"Shit, brother, you sure forgot how to drive. And why is your car not trashed yet?"

"I have not seen myself back then. I must stay out of sight." Present-time Bayonetta noted.

The DeLorean appeared, leaving a trail of fire on the asphalt. Marty came out of the car.

"The power of love! That is how they avoid the damage!"

"That's my target." Present-time Bayonetta noted.

"Who are you?" Ryosuke asked.

"What? You haven't seen BTTF? Ryosuke, you amaze me." Before-the-race Bayonetta laughed.

"Hey guys, I've heard you are the ULRT. I know that you're more into serious racing, but I've though the witches may enjoy one last unserious race. A race against a time machine!" Marty continued.

Keisuke's car stopped.

"What did we miss?" Before-the-race Jeanne asked.

"You're racing me tommorrow, in the midnight. If you lose, ULRT is over. If you win... Well, you win." Marty explained.

Bayonetta stealthy approached the DeLorean to see where Marty headed after the conversation.

"If you disagree, I'll make sure ULRT is never even created." Marty continued.

"The witch hunts!" Present-time Bayonetta said.

"A race through time would be great." Before-the-race Bayonetta noted.

"As far as I know, time travel works in a different way in the BTTF universe, so we might use that to our advantage." Before-the-race Jeanne noted.

Keisuke and Ryosuke started walking towards their house. "Fuck them, brother, we're not into that kind of shit." Ryosuke said.

"I'll meet you later, Keisuke." Before-the race Jeanne said.

The before-the-race witches sat in the car and went back in time.

"Time to go back in time as well." Present-time Bayonetta said.

The present-time Jeanne was standing with the information-providing Bayonetta.

"So what version of Bayonetta are you?" Present-time Jeanne asked.

"What version? Well, I'm done after our little meeting. Listen, I want to surprise myself from the past, can you pretend you already seen the race?"

They proceeded to repeat the meeting.

Akina during Witch Hunts. Were there any witches in Japan? Looks like like there actually were judging by the amounth of angels all around the place.

Bayonetta waited and soon enough the DeLorean arrived and Marty got out.

"Hello, Marty."

"Wait, you can time travel as well?"

"I just want to thank you for your little race offer. You know what I mean, we'll have a good time."

"Oh, I'm not so easily fooled!"

"Come on, we're gonna have fun."

"No."

Bayonetta hit Marty and stunned him, then put him in the car.

"I'm gonna take you somewhere where I'll give you so much pleasure you'll have no chance to resist signing our little agreement."

Present-time Jeanne and information-giving Bayonetta were over with the whole scene.

"Where do we go now?" Jeanne asked.

"There's one thing you'll have to do. Marty will still try to time travel during the race even after he agrees to Bayonetta's terms. Make sure you solve that problem."

"Understood."

Information giving Bayonetta sent the present-time Jeanne to the actual race.

"The DeLorean, jump on top of it and prevent Marty going back in time."

Present-time Jeanne jumped on the DeLorean and the information-giving Bayonetta escaped.

"Marty! What are you trying to do?"

"Ahh!"

"Remember, no time travel allowed during the race!"

After the race was over, present-time Jeanne went back in time to be in the car with the present-time Bayonetta.

Present-time Bayonetta was finally ready for the race. She travelled to the beginning of the race.

Present-time Jeanne was waiting for her.

"I'll race with you. The Jeanne that prevents cheating is here, too. You'll have to tell Jeanne from the very beginning she needs to go here and stop Marty from using time travel during the race!"

The witches easily won the race as the DeLorean wasn't nearly as fast to keep up with them. After the race was over, Bayonetta went to the beginning to be the information-giving Bayonetta and tell Jeanne to prevent Marty's cheating.

Jeanne, on the other hand, had to bury Marty in a lake to prevent him altering the race later on.

The mindfuck is over.