AN: Oh hey, here's the next chapter! I've said this elsewhere already, but I'll leave another reminder here that I'm heading up to the mountains next Monday through Wednesday, and I won't have steady internet access during that time period, so no updates to anything at all during that time. I'm sure you'll survive without me, though. As always, thanks for reading, and I'd love it if you could take a little bit of time to leave a review!

EDIT 11/13: Also, uh, thanks a bunch, anon whose review I already deleted because w o w, for dismissing what is literally the main point of the story as 'filler'. Right from the start, the main plot and the main point of this story has always been Paikaru/Heiji and his memories, and his relationships with the people around him (the Black Org plot, which although flashier and louder, has always been the subplot of this fic)- so uh, if you couldn't even tell that much, I guess I'm probably not half as good of a writer as I actually thought I was, and I had such confidence in this chapter too ahahaha. Like if you're looking for a fic that's snappy and quick, you're kind of in the wrong place, because this fic has always been meant to be an exploration of the topic of amnesia and deception, and while I've always planned for snappy action around the climax of the fic, it's less of a loud, action fic with a few quiet moments, and more of a quiet, psychological fic with a few loud, action moments. Like... that's literally been the point like. this whole time.

Kind of wish you hadn't used the anon option so I could have actually told you this over a less public avenue, but Ive been feeling pretty awful and unfocused since you left it, so unless I get this out here I might never be able to pick up the fic again so hahaha, here we go. Anyways, sorry for the ramble/rant to anyone checking this chapter for the first time, and please carry on with reading!

Until next time!

Phantasmal Black

Chapter Thirteen

Bridge

"Geez, that guy hasn't come back yet?"

A rather deep frown set on her features, Kazuha glanced down at her watch, finding herself once more pacing the floor. He was already gone by the time anyone woke up and had thought to check on him, and it was already almost noon now! Shinichi had reassured her that everything was probably alright, and to a degree, she believed him- but she also had a rather deep understanding of just how much trouble Heiji could get himself into without even so much as trying.

And that was when he wasn't being chased by a pro assassin.

"Calm down, Kazuha. I'm sure Hattori-kun is just fine." Ran reassured her, giving her friend a small smile. "Why don't you sit down? When you pace like that, it sort of makes me a bit nervous too."

"Oh, sorry, Ran." Ceasing in her pacing, Kazuha turned towards her friend, giving her an apologetic smile. Ever since they were still teenagers, the two of them had always kind of absorbed emotions from the other like a sponge- that was just how close the two of them had gotten, so quickly. "I'm just worried about that idiot, ya know. Now more than ever, really."

"Well, I can't exactly blame you." Ran told her, watching as Kazuha collapsed on the sofa next to her. "I keep feeling like I want the whole thing to hurry up and start already so that we can get this over with."

"Yeah, yeah, I know that feelin'." Kazuha said, nodding her head. "But more than anythin', I want a chance ta give that damn Merlot woman a piece of my mind! Who does she think she is, kidnappin' Heiji like that an' doin' what she did ta him? It's unforgivable, Ran! I won't let her get away with it."

"I can understand that feeling too." Unable to help but smile, Ran gave a rather knowing nod of her head. "I've felt that way for a long time about that Gin person. For doing something like that to Shinichi, for nearly killing him... just once, before all of this is over, I'd like to give him one good punch!"

"That's it, that's it!" Vigorously nodding her head, Kazuha beamed brightly at Ran, her eyes almost sparkling. "That's exactly how I feel, Ran!" Relaxing a little, Kazuha's smile turned a bit sheepish, a somewhat nervous laugh working it's way past her lips. "Well, that said, I'm not an idiot, either. I'm not about ta go toe ta toe with someone who has spent their entire life probably trainin' ta kill people. Just ya know... if I get a chance, right? At the very least, I'd definitely like the chance ta get ta have a good talk with that woman."

"She has the nerve ta think she understands even the first thing about Heiji, but I'll make sure ta let her know she doesn't know any damn thing about him!" Firmly nodding her head, Kazuha folded her arms in front of her chest, springing to her feet. "That said, I am gettin' a little nervous about that idiot, so I'll probably head out an' go look fer him. Ai-chan said she thinks he still remembers Osaka's streets pretty well, but well, I wouldn't put it past him ta get his butt lost anyways. It's been five years since he's been here last, after all. Some things have changed."

"Do you know where to start looking for him, though?" Ran asked, a slight frown on her face. "It might really be better to wait for him here. I'm sure he'll come back, Kazuha. Shinichi said that much himself."

"I know that he'll come back." Kazuha said, her voice coming out a bit sharper than she had intended. Quickly flashing her friend another apologetic smile- she'd gotten into a bit of a fight with Hakuba over the subject already, so she couldn't help but be a little bit testy. "Still, I've never been much of one ta just sit around an' wait fer him. Who knows if that guy even remembers how ta handle crowds anymore? He's definitely got some bad habits he didn't have before, so I can't help but worry about him. Besides, it'll be fine. He's still Heiji, after all, so I know a few places ta start lookin' fer him."

"I suppose that's true." Ran said, giving her a slight nod of her head- before a slightly mischievous look surfaced on her face. "Well then, good luck, Kazuha! You never know, maybe he's over at Ebisu Bridge?"

Her cheeks turning a bright shade of red at the implication of her words, Kazuha quickly covered it with a cough. "No, no, there's no way he's there. If it's Heiji, that idiot's probably followin' his stomach."

"I have a theory regarding Hattori-kun's memory loss."

"A theory?" Well, that was more or less what he expected to hear from her after she had requested to speak with him today. From the neutral expression on her face, he couldn't tell if it was good news or bad news. Given that he was almost entirely certain that the reason Paikaru hadn't been found anywhere that morning was because he was either trying to jog his own memory, or he had already remembered something, he could only hope it was good news.

"Well, let's hear it, Haibara."

"I'm certain that you've already noticed that Hattori-kun's amnesia is almost unusually severe." Ai noted, resting her elbow on the table next to her, resting her chin in her hand. "Even if he had been purposefully kept away from stimuli that might jog his memory, and has been lied to for years, it's still unusual that he remembers not even the slightest thing after all this time. Especially given your theory as to why he spared that one girl."

"I've been wondering about that myself, actually." Shinichi admitted, nodding his head. "I would have thought that meeting Kazuha-chan might have jolted something big inside him, but it doesn't appear as if that's happened." Whatever the case, Kazuha did seem to be something of a link to his missing memories- perhaps it was because of the charm that he had carried with him all this time, the charm which served as his only link to the past.

Even if he had managed to remember something, he got the impression that it was probably nothing more than a small fragment. If he did properly remember something, Shinichi didn't doubt that he would share such a thing with them- that it would produce some form of relief for him, filling in an empty void where nothing was. Whether it was because he was changing little by little, or just because he was slowly coming out of the hard shell that he had hidden himself in, Paikaru's personality did seem to be getting a little warmer recently- although there were still plenty of cold moments.

Ai still avoided him, for the most part, when she didn't need him for something. That aura was still there.

"While it's true that the initial cause for Hattori-kun's amnesia is most likely due to head trauma," Ai told him, getting up from her chair and moving to where she had placed the images that she had taken of his brain, "...here and here, to be precise, you can still see traces of an old wound that's already healed. When I felt around that area externally myself, there were traces of an old scar around here. Most likely he probably hit his head somewhere, perhaps when he was washed ashore. That's my running theory there."

"The head trauma, most likely combined with his near death experience, was more than enough to create the circumstances under which he would lose his memories." Ai told him, glancing up towards Shinichi. "However, even in such a case, under normal circumstances, his memories should have still gradually returned to him over time. As I mentioned before, even if there was an attempt to prevent him from interacting with stimuli that might have triggered the return of his memories, it's impossible to prevent all of them. Sometimes the stimuli can be as something as common as a smell, or a turn of phrase... which leaves the question as to why this didn't happen."

"Obviously, there's no obvious signs that his brain has been tampered with in any way." Ai said, folding her arms in front of her chest, narrowing her eyes. It had been her first theory, though. "To begin with, if the Organization had that kind of ability, they would have been ten times more complicated to deal with- and I doubt that they would have developed anything like it in the ensuing five years after their downfall at large. Neither you nor Hakuba-kun have managed to uncover any kind of indication that they've managed to retain any of their researchers. Aside from myself, most of their former researchers are behind bars."

"Well, there's no denying that he's obviously gone through a form of brainwashing, but it's the far more traditional type you'd find anywhere." Ai noted. She hadn't been doing nothing all of this time, after all- she had been busy at work, preparing any number of tests for the amnesiac former detective. "However, even that wouldn't create the current problem, though it's doubtlessly related to it."

"So in another words?" Shinichi asked, more or less following what she was saying.

"It's possible that his persistent amnesia is something of a defense mechanism." Ai said finally, a deep frown crossing her features. "Well, it's just a theory at that moment. Most likely around the time Hattori-kun began doubting the things that he had been told, and began doubting the gap in his memories, something like a defensive wall, you could say, developed around his lost memories. The fact that he was able to subconsciously remember Kazuha-chan enough to the point where he couldn't kill someone who strongly resembled her is proof enough that they're still there- just not in a place where he can consciously draw them out or interact with them in any way."

"Furthermore, when I asked him about it, he mentioned that he sometimes experiences a sharp, stinging pain when he tries to recall things from his past. It's possible that some part of him is trying to actively prevent him from doing so." Ai explained. "Most likely, the more he pushes to remember something, the worse it gets. That would prevent anyone from digging too deep."

"But why?" Shinichi asked, his brows furrowing together. "Wouldn't remembering his past be a good thing?"

"Under the current circumstances, of course." Ai said simply, a grave expression crossing her face. "However, under his previous circumstances, what do you think would happen if Paikaru suddenly recalled Hattori-kun's memories? If he was an average person before all of this, it might not be as bad, but the fact remains that Hattori-kun was a detective, and was involved with the fall of the Organization in the first place- the same Organization he had probably already been deeply entrenched with at this point. Merlot's brainwashing also comes into play here- to be frank, Kudo-kun, I don't believe Paikaru possesses that same strong sense of justice that Hattori-kun once did. Something like that is unnecessary for an assassin, so it was more than likely stomped out of him."

"In such a state, it's possible that if he suddenly recalled his memories of his previous life, so to speak, the shock might potentially cause a mental break. In order to prevent that, and to protect himself from doing that, his brain created it's own means to safeguard itself." Ai explained, heaving a long sigh. "At the very least, that's my theory. The human brain can be a pretty impressive thing."

"Then, if Hattori regains his memories, what happens?" Shinichi asked, a look of worry on his face as he rose to his feet.

"It's true that the mental defenses that he's built up over time might make it a bit difficult, and I wouldn't recommend trying to force it." Ai answered. "That's probably what the sharp pain he experiences when he tries is warning him about. Even now, I'm concerned that trying to remember everything at once might cause him considerable mental strain. When you factor in the fact that he most likely has identity issues as it is already, it's possible that such a thing might result in his two sets of memories diverging, potentially creating something akin to a split personality. Naturally, that's something we would want to avoid."

"But as I mentioned before, his circumstances have changed. I believe that with time and steady, gradual effort, his memories will probably naturally come back to him in bits and pieces." Ai told him, a slight smile working it's way onto her face. "There's no need to rush it, in other words. As the same subconscious forces that created it in the first place begin to understand that there's less and less need for a defensive wall in the first place, it should slowly come down on it's own."

Letting out a slight sigh of relief, Shinichi closed his eyes, before nodding his head, opening them once more. "More or less, I understand, Haibara. So? What do you recommend that we should do in the meantime?"

"The best thing you can do for him is to continue as you have been." Ai said, placing her hands on her hips. "It wanes, every now and again, that aura of his. It probably won't ever completely go away, but I think being around you and the others has been ultimately a good thing for his mental health, Kudo-kun. Frankly, it's a miracle that he's held up this far, he's more fragile than he looks in regards to that right now. He's been under some pretty dire circumstances for the past several years, after all, it's going to take him some time to learn that it's safe for him to open up again."

"To begin with, Hattori-kun was originally a very open person." Ai told him, recalling the few times that she had met him in the past. The Osakan high school detective had taken her by surprise when she had first met him- she wasn't quite expecting someone with Heiji's personality, having grown so used to dealing with that of Shinichi's. It was refreshing, in a way, the way he was quick to grin, the way that he was almost like an open book. "I believe it's still possible for him to return to being that way, at least around those he thinks of as his friends."

"Well something like that too, will probably take time." Ai finished, locking eyes with Shinichi. And around strangers, it might very well never happen, but she decided not to add that for the moment. Psychology, after all, was not quite her forte, even if she had spent the past few days studying it very intently- especially as it related to memory and memory loss. "And it's your job to ensure that he's able to get that time- not to mention that we all get out of this with our lives. Do you think you can manage that, mister great detective?"

"Hey now, who do you think you're speaking about here?" Shinichi asked, placing a hand over his chest almost in mock offense, before cracking a smile. "Don't worry, Haibara. I'll bring an end to our nightmare once and for all. Yours and mine."

And Heiji's as well. He was the one who had dragged him into this nightmare in the first place- more than anyone else, he deserved to be free of it.

"Since when did I become yours?"

Those half remembered words had been plaguing him ever since they had first emerged from the darkness of his memories, like trickle of water from a faucet that didn't quite work anymore. He felt a little bit silly chasing the words of someone that was nothing more than a manifestation of his subconscious, but there was something within them that gave Paikaru the feeling that if he chased that rabbit long enough, there might be something there at the end of it.

"Go back ta Ebisu Bridge."

Sneaking out of the temporary residence that Kaito had arranged for them was easy enough. He had considered leaving a note, but he didn't want to bring up the fragment of his memory until he actually had something more than just a fragment. He didn't want to get anyone's hopes up, just in case it might very well be the only thing that he would ever recall. Well, he kind of figured that Shinichi would understand anyways, though he didn't doubt that Hakuba would grill him later.

He must have really lived in this city before, and for some time at that, given how his feet had naturally lead him to this place. There was no doubt that if he gave them the freedom to do so, they would lead him back to what was likely to be his home- but that was a place that he had no place returning to as he was now. Maybe once his memories returned to him, if such a thing were possible, but Paikaru had no place going back to the home that Hattori Heiji had grown up in, until he had vanished from it.

Because of him.

Well, not that he didn't already feel out of place on crowded and lively Ebisu Bridge. At the very least, he wasn't standing out. Even with his black clothes, the hood of his thin black jacket raised up over his head, it didn't appear that anyone paid him all that much mind as he leaned back against the railing, watching the crowd. Even if he did use to be famous here, that was five years ago, and everyone long since thought that he was dead.

The world had moved on without him.

He'd finally looked them up- the articles about his own death. Hattori Heiji's death, really, which was, in a sense, true. It had been rather surreal, scanning headline after headline mourning the loss of the brilliant young high school detective, seeing someone from a world in which everyone held him up, praising him for what he did. A world where he lived in the light, existing in places like this crowded and lively meeting spot, and not in the shadow, where the things he did were nothing that anyone would ever thank him for, and nothing that deserved thanks.

If the world knew what had become of the once famous and much praised high school detective... well, if there was one thing that he knew, it was how much the media enjoyed a good circus. They would descend on the subject like a pack of single minded rats, not caring about anyone they hurt in the process. Not that he had any intention of becoming anyone's show for entertainment- if they tried something like that on him, they would have another thing coming.

Still, as out of place as he felt here, watching families, couples, and friends alike meeting up with each other, chatting for awhile before heading on to whatever it was that they needed to do- it was somehow calming, hearing all of these voices speaking mostly in the Osaka dialect. Given the fact that Merlot had spent the past five years trying to bury his own, and had done rather well in that, somehow, hearing it being spoken freely around him was almost a bit liberating. It'd still probably be awhile before it returned to being the default way that he spoke Japanese, though.

What was it about this bridge, exactly? What had happened here? He got the feeling that those words that he had managed to remember hadn't actually been said here, but somewhere else, later on- but they were words that were directly tied to this bridge. There was that gaudily dressed man as well... who was he? For some reason, bringing up the vague memory of him made him feel annoyed. He didn't feel like he actually knew him either, not in the same way that he knew Shinichi or Kazuha- or even Hakuba, for that matter.

Closing his eyes, Paikaru tried to concentrate, even amongst the chattering voices that floated from every corner of the bridge. Surely there must be something more that he could remember, now that he was back here, to this place- he just had to try a little bit harder. Not only did he feel like he owed to everyone back at what some small part of his brain wanted to inform him was 'home', but he also wanted to remember for his own sake.

He might have spent the past five years with a void for where his memory should be, but it was never a situation that he had ever once become comfortable with. All the more so when he realized that the one who had been with him when he woke up had lied to him, convincing him that he was someone he wasn't. As much as he hated to admit it, he had believed her almost completely, up to a certain point, up until he started to question things. To realize that he was someone entirely different than who he thought he was... frankly, it was terrifying.

Hand straying to his left wrist, carefully placing it over where it had been bandaged, Paikaru rubbed it lightly, opening his eyes and gazing back out over the bridge. It was probably for the best that he had worn something with long sleeves- his scars would attract far more attention than his face would. Even more than the aura he apparently gave off, that not everyone could sense, they were something that marked him as someone who probably didn't belong in this world anymore.

Even though he was starting to want to.

"Focus." Paikaru mumbled underneath his breath, realizing that his thoughts were straying from the issue at hand. Namely, that of his memories. Grip tightening around his wrist, he closed his eyes again, once more trying to recall what it was that had happened here, what it was that had called him to this place. Taking in and letting out a deep breath, he once again brought the faint memories that had bubbled up within his mind, trying to expand them, trying to draw more out from them.

For a moment, as he dug deeper, there was a hint of something, more a vague impression of a memory than a proper one- talking to someone on the phone? Something about train stations? For some reason, he found his brain pulling out all the general knowledge that he knew about marijuana, of all things, sorting through it at a rapid pace before it decided it was apparently irrelevant. An overall sense of irritation, and then-

"What are ya-"

That was when a bolt of pain shot through his head, sharper than it had ever been before, overpowering almost everything else. Eyes flying wide open, the sharp burst of pain causing him for a moment to forget where he was, Paikaru clutched at his head, letting out an audible noise of distress. Faintly, through blurred vision, he could make out images of bystanders taking notice, a low murmur going around the area he had positioned himself at. Only faintly realizing that someone was reaching a hand out towards him, not hearing nor understanding the words of concern that were spoken alongside it, he lashed out, grabbing the arm, wrenching it so that he twisted it around the back of the man thoughtful enough, but also unfortunate enough, to offer a hand to an obviously distressed stranger.

At the man's grunt of pain, Paikaru seemed to quickly snap back to reality, once again remembering where he was, and what his position was here. Suddenly realizing that the man who had reached out to him had probably been trying to help him, not hurt him, he quickly released his arm, taking half a step back, prevented from going any further by the bridge's railing.

Suddenly, the people who hadn't been paying him even the slightest bit of attention had their eyes on him, a few of them quickly hurrying to the side of the man that he had ended up attacking, trying to see if he was alright. Suddenly feeling very exposed, Paikaru quickly reached for his hood, pulling it down a bit further over his face, feeling his heart tense in his chest.

He didn't know how he dealt with attention like this in the past, but right now, his current reaction to it was the overpowering desire to lash out with the only thing he really knew. As if by instinct, he almost felt his hand straying to where he'd hidden his gun- before he moved it away, shoving both hands into his pockets instead, where they couldn't be used to harm anyone else. What had he been thinking? Even he recognized that the guy probably had only meant to help him, that he had only just been concerned.

Maybe he really wasn't suited for this world anymore. Maybe he really was, just as Merlot had said, fooling himself into believing that he could exist here anymore. He'd changed since then- he wasn't Hattori Heiji anymore. That name and identity had been stripped away from him alongside his memories, and he was only fooling himself into thinking that any of those things would come back to him.

Maybe it really would be easier to go back to where he came from- or at least, the place he'd spent the past five years believing that he had come from. Maybe it would be best if he forced himself to forget everything that he had learned here, to forget everyone that he had met here- to once more return to being just Paikaru, to once more seal away the things that slowly, piece by piece, bit by bit, he was letting come out of the hard shell that he had built up around himself. To once more become nothing more than a cold, empty shell.

But even so.

"Ya'd better look after them, Paikaru. There's nothin' I can do fer 'em now."

It was ridiculous. They were nothing more than words spoken to him in a dream, by a manifestation of his own subconscious, the product of what was clearly his own troubled brain. There was no reason for him to put any stock in them, and certainly no reason for him to keep his promise with the imaginary version of his past self that he had dreamed up.

But even so.

That was a part of him. A small part of him, that when he made himself listen to it, softly told him that no matter how difficult it might be, no matter how unsuited he felt to being here, this was where he belonged. Here, with the people he had slowly been getting to know all over again, bit by bit, piece by piece. He belonged here, not over there- not over in the shadows.

And so.

Slowly drawing in a long breath, she swallowed back everything else, everything that had been forced into him, filling up the empty shell that his amnesia had left behind. He had to do better than this- he had to be better than this. It wouldn't wash away anything that he had done- but for the people that he had left behind, and for the person that he used to be- he needed to be better.

"S-sorry." The apology was almost forced out, the sound of it so unfamiliar on his lips, as Paikaru turned towards the man who was still nursing his arm. At the very least, he hadn't broken it- thank god, he must have held back some. Which was, quite honestly, unusual for him. Had he been getting a bit soft, maybe? "I didn't mean to do that at all. I'm just... really, really bad with bein' touched by strangers. I react, ah, real bad to it."

"No, no." The man finally spoke up, shaking his head, even as he rubbed his shoulder. There was a note of almost unfathomable sympathy in his voice, even. Concern too, if he didn't know any better. "That was a bit presumptuous of me, I should have been the one ta know better. Are ya alright though? Ya seemed like ya were in pain."

Blinking a little, having half not expected his apology to be accepted so easily, Paikaru finally realized that he was still waiting for an actual response. Crap, interacting with normal people outside of one of his mission was something that he had always been bad at- he wondered if it had always been this way, and quickly decided that probably wasn't the case. "Ah, yeah, I'm fine now. It was just a bad headache, nothing to worry about."

"That's good, then." The man said, giving him a nod of his head. "Were you waitin' fer someone here?"

"Ah, that's not quite..." Paikaru began, lifting him a hand, half wondering why he was making conversation with him now. Had he really gotten this bad at understanding people? Well, given the two people that he had most commonly interacted with up to this point were hardly normal, one could hardly blame him, but still...

"So ya really were here, Heiji!"

Blinking, slowly turning his head towards the person who had called out to him, having already easily recognized the voice. A slightly angry expression was set on her features, as she all but barreled through the crowd towards him, only sparing the man that he was speaking with a momentary look, before turning her full focus back on him. She probably hadn't even realized that she had said his real name, and he half didn't have it in him to deny her it.

"Geez, ya can't just go wanderin' off like that on yer own, ya know? What if ya get lost?" Kazuha asked, planting herself in front of him. The man that he had been speaking with seemed to take a hint, and made himself quickly scared, leaving Paikaru half wondering if he had misunderstood something. "It's been five years since ya been here, five years! Honestly, I can't believe that Ran was right though, an' you were hangin' out at Ebisu Bridge of all places. What were ya tryin' ta do, get yerself used to crowds?"

She tried to tell herself not to read too much into it, though. Ebisu Bridge, after all, was a place where they had met up countless times in the past, even before that incident.

"Ah, somethin' like that." Paikaru said quickly, sheepishly rubbing the back of his neck. He didn't think he should mention what he was actually doing here just yet- just in case he couldn't bring forward anything more than fragments, he didn't want to get anyone's hopes up just yet. "Sorry, sorry. Now that I think about it, I didn't mention where I was goin'. That Blondie's probably fumin'."

"Oh trust me, he is." Kazuha told him, rolling her eyes. "Honestly, if ya wanted ta tour around Osaka while ya had the chance, ya could have just asked me, ya know." Holding out her hand, her angry expression quickly faded away almost as if it had never been there, replaced by a broad smile. "Have ya had lunch yet, Heiji? There's a good place near here that opened up a little while ago that I've been dyin' ta try. If we're about ta face down with some nasty people, then at the very least, I wanna do it with the memory of some good food in me."

Glancing down at her hand, half uncertain of what to do with it for a moment, Paikaru merely tilted his head. She had used his real name again- something which she was slowly seeming to realize now, an apology for it on her lips, waiting to be said. What came out instead, however, was-

"It's my hand, idiot. Yer supposed ta take it, not just leave it hangin' there. Ya aren't good with strangers, right? This bridge is full of 'em, after all." Kazuha asked. "Geez, yer really like a child, Paikaru. Well, ya do only have five years of memories, so I suppose that can't be helped."

"What's that supposed ta mean?" Without thinking too hard about it, Paikaru's eyes narrowed, quickly snapping at her. "Don't treat me like a child, Kazuha. I'll have ya know, I still remember my general knowledge well enough. That's different from my personal memories, idiot!"

Perhaps he shouldn't be hurling insults at her, but it had slipped from him before he could even so much as stop it- and strangely enough, Kazuha didn't seem the least bit upset by it. Weird.

"Yes, yes, I'm sure that's true." Kazuha said, nodding her head. "Now, are ya comin' or what? Geez, I don't know what yer thinkin', walkin' around so openly in a city when people are huntin' fer ya. Not ta mention while wearin' that damn recognizable face of yers." That was, incidentally, why they were going to a new place, rather than a place where she was a regular at- there wasn't a single one among that number where Heiji wouldn't be recognized, even if they thought he had been dead all this time.

It was best not to overcomplicate things, she thought, even if Shinichi had reassured her that everything would be fine even if rumors began to spread. That guy definitely had some part of his plan that he was still keeping to himself... he was always like that, now that she thought about it.

Maybe she'd beat it out of him later. Secrets were exhausting.

"Fine, I'll come with ya." Paikaru said after a moment. "But I'm not holdin' yer damn hand."

"Just hold it, ya idiot." Kazuha insisted, reaching out to take his hand anyways, entwining her fingers with his own before he had a chance to so much as protest. "Ya've kept me waitin' all this time, the least ya can do is hold my hand." Blinking, turning back to look at him, a slight frown graced her face, taking notice of the rather zoned out expression on his face. "Ya okay, Paikaru? Don't tell me that holdin' hands with a girl broke ya?"

"Of course not." Paikaru muttered, shaking his head, shooting her a dirty look. In that too, there was the strangest sense of nostalgia. This all felt familiar- as if it had all happened before.

And for a moment, as the tips of her fingers brushed over the scar on his hand that he couldn't remember getting, something else bubbled forth from the recesses of his mind. An arrow and a grave, accompanied by the sound of waves.

"Even if I die, I won't let go."

"He's been spotted."

Those words were more then enough to cause Shinichi to tear his attention away from the article that he was scanning, turning his full attention towards Sera. He didn't need her to elaborate to tell him who, exactly, she meant. They knew where Paikaru had wandered off to now, since Kazuha had touched bases with him when she had found him- on Ebisu Bridge, amusingly enough.

There was only one other person, then, who was left.

"Where?" Shinichi asked, rising to his feet, the legs of his chair scratching the floor as it pushed out from behind him. "When?"

"In the area around your house, an hour ago. He was probably scouting for information." Sera told him, a grave expression on her face. "Just as you thought he would, he's finally returned to Japan."

"So the time is finally coming." Taking in and letting out a deep breath, Shinichi quickly steeled himself. "Call everyone here. We have to let everyone know. It probably won't take them all that long to figure out what city we've relocated to."

That too, was part of the plan. He had already gotten in touch with none other than Hattori Heizo, informing him that there was a chance that two high ranking Organization members could be following them to this city, and that he should inform his officers to keep a close eye out for people matching their descriptions.

And under no circumstances, should those officers in any way attempt to follow or confront them. Knowing full well that those people were capable of, Heizo had agreed.

It hadn't been easy, speaking to the man when the knowledge that his son was alive was right there, waiting to be said. But there was a time and a place for that- and the one who needed to decide if he was going to face down his parents could only be Heiji himself- no one else could do it for him, and no one else could force him. For the moment, Shinichi had left out the fact that they were cooperating with a former Organization member who had betrayed them, deciding to save that too, for later.

But not blurting all of that out to Heizo had proved to be incredibly difficult. Even though he was a proper adult now, Heizo was no less intimidating than he had been when he was still a teenager- or when he was still Conan, for that matter. Still, he'd managed.

"Can do." With a quick grin in spite of the circumstances, Sera leaned against the doorframe for a moment longer, locking eyes with him. "Are you sure you don't want me to call my brother? There's still time, you know."

"It'll be fine, Sera." Shaking his head, Shinichi returned her smile, a certain fierceness to his own. "We're no longer children ourselves, after all."

"That's true." Sera said, nodding her head, standing straight up. "There's no longer any need to remain in his shadow, huh. Well, I'll contact everyone, Shinichi-kun. You'd better get ready to rally the troops, mister great detective."

Watching as Sera shot him another quick grin, Shinichi watched her go, taking in and letting out another deep breath after she had. Steeling himself for the dangerous task ahead, he swallowed back any lingering fears that he might have- no was not the time for such a thing either.

One way or another, this would come to an end.

"I thought you said that he wasn't going to be a problem. It's unlike you to misjudge something like this, Merlot."

The cold voice that spoke to her would have sent chills up the spine of almost anyone else, but Merlot turned to face the man without so much as flinching. He might be as young as he used to be either, but there was no way that she was going to allow herself to be intimidated by someone who was basically still a child in her book.

Even if he was, in a sense, her boss.

"I hardly believe Paikaru is a problem, Gin, even now." Merlot said simply, shaking her head. "He's wavering now, sure enough, but his place is here, with me, in the end. He's already become a part of our Organization, it's not something that someone can leave behind them so easily."

"He's allied himself with some rather bothersome pests. No doubt your identity has been exposed to them because of him." Gin said shortly, narrowing his eyes. If he hadn't been so fixed on the likes of Akai Shuichi and Sherry, perhaps he would have taken notice of the one who had slipped through his fingers- taken notice of Kudo Shinichi, who had somehow survived the poison that he had been given. Because of that, he had been able to strike a critical blow the Organization, causing it to all but crumble into dust.

If he hadn't caught wind of his plans to close in on him when he did, even he wouldn't have been able to escape. He'd done so, taking what little Organization remained with him, and what few important members there were left- the small fry, those without codenames, were of no matter to him.

For a very long time now, he'd been wanting revenge. But with the Organization no longer holding the power that it once did, such a thing would have to wait until the right time. And for what he had done, no ordinary method of payback would work- it had to be something much grander, and much more painful, something that would cause him to suffer.

That was when Merlot had introduced him to the new pupil that she had taken on, just as the Organization was falling apart around them.

"It matters not." Merlot said simply, shaking her head. "For someone of my experience, something as little as my face being known is hardly enough to prevent me from carrying out my work. Well, although from the sound of your tone, I take it that you've already given up on that plan, Gin."

"If Paikaru has chosen to ally himself with them instead of us, there's no way that plan can be carried out at this point." Gin replied, a rather cutting tone to his voice. Not that it mattered to the woman before him- but he was never one for bottling up his anger. "You were the one who proposed it in the first place, need I remind you. If he's gone to Kudo Shinichi," and there was a clear venom in his tone as he spoke his name, as he remembered all too clearly what had been lost because of him, "...then it's highly unlikely that he would agree to kill him at this point."

What a revenge that would have been- to have the person who finally did away with him be none other than the ally that he thought he had lost. Frankly, Gin had paid little attention to Hattori Heiji before this, even though he had some idea that he was involved with Kudo Shinichi's efforts to dismantle the Organization. His eyes had been on Kudo Shinichi himself, and the bigger fish by his side.

When Merlot had introduced him to the amnesiac young man, he had his doubts. Certainly, she had a gift for training assassins, and had trained any number for the Organization that carried out their missions with efficiency and ruthlessness alike, but creating one out of someone who once claimed himself to be an ally of justice was another matter entirely. That sort of thing was incredibly difficult to stomp out of that type, even if their memories were lost. Still, he'd been willing to allow it at the time, given that he didn't have much choice.

Recruiting new members was always a priority, but that was something that needed to be done after a certain amount of framework was reestablished. These things couldn't be rushed, however angry he was.

In the end, to his surprise, he'd shown promise. Merlot's exact training methods were something that he was never privy to, but he always got the impression that it was in part, nothing short of torture. Even when Kudo Shinichi's name and deeds were spoken of in front of him, the young man who had been given the codename of Paikaru didn't so much as blink.

"I only need to speak with him once more, Gin. His memories still haven't returned." Merlot said simply, a placid smile crossing her face. "And if I can't convince him, then I'll simply have to kill him. Well, hopefully he'll see reason. That Kudo Shinichi might claim friendship, but there's no way he intends to give Paikaru what he desires the most. Once he realizes that, he'll come back to me."

"His memories?" Gin asked, raising his brows. "I believe he's almost overqualified for that."

"No, not his memories. That child's memories may very well never return." Merlot said simply, shaking her head. "Freedom. That is Paikaru's most core desire, above all else. I understand the child that I helped shape very well, Gin. And Kudo Shinichi is a detective. It's true that in the past, they might have been friends," and her lips twisted in a frown there, "...but as it stands now, the two of them exist within two different worlds. In the end, Kudo-san will betray Paikaru, and ensure that he's brought to justice, the same as all of my other pupils were. That's what a detective does, after all."

"I simply need to remind him of that. That if stays with them, the only thing that awaits him is death."