AN: Sorry about the delay, I was caught up with various circumstances (including such fun things as ice storms and power outages). But here's the fifteenth chapter at last! As always, thanks for reading, and it would be lovely if you could leave a review on your way out!

Until next time!

Phantasmal Black

Chapter Fifteen

Promises

"Still, when you told us this part of your plan, I was surprised, Shinichi-kun. Considering that you said as much at the onset, I was under the impression that you didn't want to involve them in this matter."

"I said I didn't want them involved with Paikaru just yet." Shinichi clarified, glancing over towards Sera, giving her something of a half-smile. This was one part of the plan that he hadn't mentioned to Paikaru- or Kazuha, for that matter. "I never said that I wanted to keep them out of the matter entirely. As it stands, the FBI have more authority to punish the Organization than the Osakan police, and they'll probably be more secure in their care once the matter is finished. That's why I called them here."

Well, that, and there was the fact that they had one of the best snipers he had ever known among their ranks. If push came to shove, having someone like Akai Shuichi on their side might actually tip the scale in their favor. She might be a highly trained assassin, but Merlot's specialities lay in more direct assaults- even someone like her surely couldn't dodge a sniper's bullet.

From the way that Paikaru spoke of her, he kind of got the impression that dodging a regular bullet would be something that Merlot wouldn't have a problem with. Or rather, judging from the information that he had managed to pry from Paikaru, he already knew that she was capable of such a feat. Considering that she was starting to approach an advanced age now, he couldn't help but briefly wonder what she would have been like in her prime.

He was kind of grateful that he would never have to find out.

"You called them? I was the one who called my brother, you know." Sera told him, shooting him something of a sharp look, one that was nevertheless quickly replaced by a bright smile. "But you're certainly right. You should just be grateful that they managed to get here on such short notice. I'm sure my brother will be fine, but I have to hope that Jodie-san isn't prone to bad jet lag."

"I knew that if you mentioned anything about them, they would be sure to come quickly." Shinichi said simply. "They can't exactly call it case closed until they're finally put the Organization to rest for good."

"Well, that's true." Sera admitted after a moment, letting out a small laugh, even as she kept her eyes peeled on her surroundings. She wasn't exactly nervous, but carelessness was the sort of thing that got people killed. Best to keep her eyes and ears open, just in case they had already been tracked this far. "But is it fine for us to be waiting for them out in the open like this? I know to some degree you actually want to attract their attention, but..."

"It's fine. There's still time before they manage to track us to Osaka." Shinichi said simply. After the meeting had finished, Sera had gotten a message from her brother informing her that they were almost here- and since they couldn't exactly give two FBI agents directions to the place where they were hiding an internationally wanted assassin, they had instead come here to pick them up. "And if it were a problem on their end, I'm sure they both would have deigned to fly in on a normal passenger plane. They're using one because it obviously isn't. Besides, there's no way we can bring either of them back there."

In truth, this was a gamble. Even if he had brought them in mostly to assist with any possible diversions that the Organization might create to distract the police, and to assist with the with the aftermath, there was still a risk. That in the middle of the chaos, it was possible that they might become aware of Paikaru's existence before he had the chance to tell them about him himself. He currently had no plans to inform them about his existence until the matter was over- although if pressed, he would at the very least admit to that much.

Giving away anything about his actual identity would come later, no matter what. He had every intention of seeing what kind of deal he could strike with Jodie, one that if nothing else, would at the very least spare his life. Something that complicated would only muck up what was about to come, and could be dealt with later- provided that Paikaru didn't decide to vanish back into ether once they took their eyes off of him. In that case, it might be better if the FBI left here without any further details about Paikaru.

Even though he was certain that Paikaru wouldn't betray them, even he couldn't say for sure if he would really stick around or not afterwards. There was no way for him to ultimately determine something he knew that even the person himself didn't know yet. He wanted to believe that he would- but that all depended on how much Paikaru's desire for answers, for his past, outweighed his desire for freedom. The feelings he doubtlessly still had for Kazuha tipped the scale somewhat in favor of him staying, but with an uncertain future ahead of him, and no guarantee that he would even regain his memories if he did stay, it was impossible to truly determine what would happen.

He knew that he shouldn't, but there was a part of him that wanted to forever keep his silence if Paikaru wanted to go. Perhaps it would be for the best to keep the knowledge that Hattori Heiji was still alive among those who already knew it, and let the world slowly forget the assassin known as Paikaru. After this, after coming to know the truth, he doubted that he would kill anyone anymore, at the very least. He would probably disappear from the world, never to resurface.

Unless he one day regained his memories, that was. If something like that happened, Shinichi had no doubt that the former detective of the west would return from the dead to turn himself in. With his memories, Hattori Heiji would surely submit himself to whatever justice was waiting for him- but without them, even the Heisei Holmes himself couldn't deduce that much.

"That's definitely true." Sera said after a moment, nodding her head. "I won't say anything about Paikaru, just as I promised before, Shinichi-kun. Even though I imagine Shu-nii will get mad at me if he finds out later." She seemed to brush off the prospect of his anger with a quick grin, knowing that it wouldn't go anything beyond an older brother frustrated with a mischievous younger sister- even though she was an adult now, that hadn't changed. "It isn't just us that has been chasing the two of them, you know, the FBI has as well."

Heaving a long sigh, she placed her hands on her hips, shaking her head. "Still, to think that it would turn out to be Heiji-kun in the end. Fate really does work in mysterious ways."

"I'd rather not think this is Hattori's fate." Shinichi couldn't help but note, a rather grim expression crossing his face. "He was a good person. He didn't deserve any of this."

"Was?" Sera couldn't help but ask, taking note of the past tense. Her gaze sliding over towards Shinichi, a slight frown graced her features. "Do you not think that any longer?"

At the long moment of silence her words earned her, she half thought that her question wouldn't be answered at all. In the end, Shinichi drew in a long breath, closing his eyes, as if trying to shut them tight against the reality he had been thrown into. "I can't exactly call a murderer a good person, even if he was- is my best friend. What he is now is someone doing his best to redeem himself as much as he possibly can. I think he would probably agree."

"Heiji-kun or Paikaru?" Sera asked, her gaze lingering on him for a moment longer, before she turned away. That was the sort of expression she hadn't seen on his face in a long time- with guilt etched into every feature. It had been harder to bear on the face of Edogawa Conan, and still hard to bear on the face of seventeen year old Kudo Shinichi. Even now, with five years time put between the two, it still wasn't an easy thing to look at.

"Both of them." Shinichi said finally, taking in and letting out a long breath, forcing himself to open his eyes again. He wasn't a child anymore, not even one merely in appearance only- he was a proper adult. And adults faced reality head on, for everything it was worth.

Thinking back on it now, whether he had been seventeen or seven, it didn't actually make much of a difference. He had still been just a child back then, as had they all. He understood his father's objections to him investigating the Organization himself better now that he was older- and he wished he could go back in time and tell his younger self that much, to not be stubborn. But he had been young- too old to realize how young he was, and too young to fully understand the possible consequences of the path he was about to set himself on, as much as he thought he knew the risks.

Reflecting back on it, he knew that he never should have dragged Heiji into what was ultimately his own mess. Because of that, everything had been stolen from him. Even as he, the one who had lead him to this fate, was able to have everything that he had taken from him.

"Now then," with a slight smile, he dashed away any such feelings of guilt from his expression, leaving behind only the lingering traces that never quite faded. "...it looks like their flight has arrived. Let's not keep them waiting, shall we? We're on a bit of a tight schedule, after all."

"Hey, where's Kudo-han?"

"There's such a thing as knocking, Paikaru." Ai dryly observed, barely sparing him a glance. "I'd ask if you were raised in a barn, but I suppose effectively being raised by the Organization would have pretty much the same effect."

"The Organization didn't raise me." With a rather surly expression on his face, Paikaru folded his arms in front of him, shooting the girl a rather sour look. A part of him begrudgingly understood what she meant, and that technically speaking, she was more or less right- but that same part of him couldn't help but grumble about the way people around here would sometimes treat him strangely like a child. "Anyways, where's Kudo-han? I wanted ta go over some last minute details with him while I still had the chance. I looked everywhere, an' he ain't around."

"He went out with Sera-san awhile ago." Ai told him simply, glancing over towards him. Of course, she knew the real reason why he had left, but she had been instructed not to tell him. If Shinichi's secrecy only came back to bite him in the ass later, she had already given him fair warning before this. "Probably to speak with your father again regarding tomorrow."

"Ah, that's right," Rubbing the back of his neck, Paikaru let out a long sigh. It was strange to hear people speaking of his father, and addressing him as such- he had spent such a long time under the impression that he didn't have anything like that, after all. And to think, out of all the things that he could be, he was Osaka's chief of police- he really had no luck. "...since there's a chance that those two might try somethin' tomorrow. I'm guessin' that Kudo-han wants ta make sure that nobody gets hurt, right?"

"He's always been that type, ever since I first met him." Ai said, heaving a long sigh, sensing that she wasn't going to get rid of him for awhile yet. Setting down her notes, she finally turned her attention towards him, spinning her chair in his direction. "You didn't only come here to ask about Kudo-kun, did you?"

"Ya really are a sharp one, little Neechan." Paikaru observed, giving her something of a smile. It did nothing to offset the crawling aura that she could sense around him, but she had time already to more or less get used to it. It didn't bother her half as much as it did at the beginning. "Actually, I have somethin' ta ask ya."

"Is it about your memories?" Ai asked.

"Oh, ya really are a sharp one, aren't ya?" Paikaru repeated. "No wonder why ya were able ta create that Ahoutoxin poison, or whatever it was that old man keeps ramblin' out."

"Apotoxin." Ai corrected him, her eyes narrowing sharply. Honestly, he had made that same mistake once before- some things really didn't change. "And there's not much else that you would come to speak to me about, Hattori-kun, aside from the Organization itself. We do have a fair bit in common in regards to that, after all."

"Well, ya've got a point there." Paikaru admitted, taking a step inside the room, closing the door behind him. Although he didn't miss the slight way that Ai tensed as he did so, it only took her a second to get that out of her system- she really had gotten a bit more used to him. "It's not a bad time or anythin', is it? I'd say I'd come back later, but who knows if there'll even be somethin' like that?"

"I suppose that's true." Ai said simply. "So? What's on your mind? Have you started remembering anything?" She had told him to come see her if that was the case, but she wasn't sure if he would or not. She was the closest thing that he had to a doctor right now, although, he really should be checked out by a proper one at some point. Not to mention a proper psychologist, something he probably needed far more than a doctor.

But the odds that they would be able to find one willing to treat a former assassin were fairly low. Considering that was the root of his current problems, rather than his memory loss, such a thing would be necessary.

"Well, it's somethin' like that. Can I have a seat?" Glancing towards one of the other chairs in the room, he watched as she gave him a rather curt nod of her head. Taking a seat in the chair, Paikaru considered his words for a few moments. He didn't think it was a good idea to tell her about his dreams- when he tried to find a way to put them into words, he realized that it only made him sound possibly a tad bit unstable.

That probably wasn't an entirely unfair assessment of his mental state, but his amnesia was causing people enough problem as it was already, he didn't need to bring any of the other issues that he probably had into the mix.

"Earlier today, I thought I was on the verge of remembering somethin', ya know. Back when I went out fer the mornin'." Finally settling on that, he leaned back in his chair, folding his arms in front of her chest, consciously making sure to keep his hands where she could see them. It seemed to make people breathe easier around him when they could see him- although there were exceptions. Neither Kazuha nor Ran ever seemed all that bothered by it. As for Shinichi...

Well, he tried.

"Oh?" Blinking slightly, Ai leaned forward in interest. "Do tell me about it, Paikaru. Given that you said you were only on the verge of doing so, I'm going to assume that you didn't actually remember anything."

"Just small flashes of things. Nothin' that made much sense." Paikaru told her, shaking his head. "Somethin' about an arrow, I remember that much. I think it might have somethin' ta do with this scar." Holding up his hand and pointing to the one he meant- he had so many these days, after all. "An' a vague line that I felt like I might have said once. Other than that, not much. I get the feelin' that wasn't what I was even tryin' ta remember in the first place anyways."

"But when I tried ta do that, my head hurt so badly it felt like it was goin' ta burst." Paikaru recalled, grimacing a little at the memory of the pain, for a brief moment, feeling it almost as vividly as he had when it actually happened. Being nothing more than a memory, it passed as soon as it came. "That's probably not a good sign, right?"

"Not necessarily." Ai said simply, schooling her expression into obedience. For the moment, she had decided against speaking to Paikaru in regards to his own condition, for fear that her words might complicate matters too much right now. Later, once everything was over, she would have a proper discussion with him about it. "If anything, it only means that you shouldn't force it."

"Yeah, I kinda gathered that much." Paikaru admitted after a moment, scratching his cheek. He couldn't help but wonder what had happened to that person after that- hopefully he hadn't hurt him too badly. Given the fact that he had more or less laughed it off, that probably wasn't the case, but still...

Reflecting on it a little, he supposed it was a positive sign that he was actually worrying about this. Normally, he wouldn't care about something like this, wouldn't let it concern him in the least. He had already killed any number of people, some only because they had seen his face, so who cared if one stranger ended up with a broken arm or a wrenched shoulder because of him?

Maybe he really did have it in him to give Merlot something of a surprise after all. To tell- no, to show her that there was still more to him than what she had attempted to sculpt him into. That there was something more to him than just the perfect pupil that she had attempted to create out of an empty shell. That underneath the person she had created, underneath Paikaru, there was still something left of that hotblooded, idiotic high school detective that everyone kept telling him so much about.

Such a thing would likely only result in her deciding to kill him, but frankly, it wasn't the first time someone had tried to do the same. He was already used to people aiming for his life, even if he was always the one who ended up taking theirs instead.

"You would do well to keep it in mind, Paikaru." Ai said simply, managing to give him something akin to a smile. "Pain is a warning sign. Powering through it isn't always the correct solution."

"Easy fer you ta say, yer not the one with amnesia." He couldn't help but retort, before heaving a long sigh. "Well, I guess ya've got a point. I don't suppose that Professor of yers has any kind of device lyin' around ta restore memories, does he? That Neechan said before that he invents all sorts of weird things."

"If he had something like that, don't you think we would have tried it already?" Ai asked simply, lifting her brows. "Memories can't be restored that way anyways."

"Yeah, I guess not." Paikaru admitted after a moment. "Well, sorry fer takin' up yer time like this, little Neechan." Rising to his feet, he flashed her another quick smile. "I'll let myself out. If ya see Kudo-han before I do, tell him that I've been lookin' fer him."

"Is there some sort of hurry?" Ai asked, tilting her head slightly. "There's some reason you came to speak with me about your memories, isn't there?"

"Ah, no..." Glancing back at her, Paikaru shook his head, trailing off a little. "It's nothin'. We can't know what the future brings us, after all. I just thought I would ask while I had the chance."

"You make it sound as if you're planning on going somewhere." Ai noted. In some respects, more than anyone else, she really could understand what he was thinking. Their circumstances weren't the same, but at their core, the two of them weren't really that different. The Organization had directly impacted their lives, their very personalities, in a way that neither of them would never be able to shake. Therefore, she understood it- that feeling of wanting to run away from everything that he doubtlessly felt.

She too, had once carried the same feelings in her heart.

"That's not it." Shaking his head, Paikaru simply gave her an awkward smile. Frankly, it wasn't a topic that he really knew how to discuss- he was kind of new to this whole talking about your feelings thing. But at the end of his debate with himself, he had come to a conclusion- that it wouldn't do him any good to doubt himself. He wasn't a good person, would never be a good person like he had been in the past- but that didn't mean he couldn't strive to be a better person than he was.

And for that reason, he couldn't run away. No matter how much he wanted to.

"I have ta pay fer my sins, after all. I couldn't run away from them, even I wanted ta." Paikaru told her, once again finding himself wondering what kind of expression he wore. He still didn't know if he could actually follow through on his words just yet- but for the time being, he was going to put his own faith into himself- since there were already so many other people doing the same.

Really, he didn't understand them at all.

"Even if that means you'll lose the one thing that you've desired more than anything?" Ai asked, carefully leveling her gaze with his.

"Yeah. I made a promise after all." He told her.

"To who?"

"Ya'd better look after them, Paikaru. There's nothin' I can do fer 'em now."

"Surprisingly enough, you apparently don't have to tell me that much."

"Myself."

"I've got the basic gist of the situation." With a firm nod of her head, Jodie Starling glanced up at the young man sitting in the seat in front of her. It had been awhile since the two of them had seen each other last- not for the past three years, really, when she asked for his help on a difficult case that she had been assigned. "Of course, Shu and I are more than willing to lend the Osakan police a hand. Is it your desire to extradite both Gin and Merlot to America, then?"

"Yeah." Shinichi said, sparing the woman a brief glance, before turning his focus back on the road. "It's best that we keep Gin as far away as possible from Haibara. Even if he ends up in prison, I doubt she'll ever feel entirely comfortable knowing that he's still in the same country as her. Extraditing Merlot might be a bit more difficult given her skill set, but I think that would also be for the best."

"Is there some kind of reason for that?" It was the first time he had spoken up since they had gotten into the car. Aside from exchanging greetings- mostly with his younger sister, he had been mostly silent during the entire trip, as if there had been something on his mind. Since he had always been that way, Shinichi really wasn't sure if it was a good or bad thing. "I can understand your reasons for wanting Gin out of the country, but I don't believe that Merlot has particular interest in anyone here, not from what I've heard, at the very least."

"She does." Exchanging a brief glance with Sera, one that he caught both FBI agents catching notice of in his peripheral vision, Shinichi's grip on the wheel tightened. "She does have someone that she's interested in, in this country. Perhaps more than one, if my theory is correct."

It was the main reason why he had arranged for Kazuha to join his group, and go after Gin. Whatever kind of mental block he might have protecting his memories, one thing was clear to him- that Kazuha was probably the trigger for his memories. Whether it was because of their deep childhood bond, or because he had held onto her charm all this time as a memento, he couldn't say- but that much at least, he was fairly certain of. Given that the trouble had begun when Paikaru had decided to spare the life of a girl who had resembled Kazuha in her teenage years, it wouldn't surprise him if a target had been painted on her back.

Just from speaking with him, the one thing he was able to gather about Merlot was that she had a rather possessive nature of anything that she considered hers. Be it an object, or a pupil she had trained- as long as they carried merit and worth for her, she wasn't interested in seeing them taken away. She had gone to this much trouble to turn Heiji into something like that, he doubted that she was interested in letting go of him this easily- and if killing Kazuha could sever a connection to his old life, she probably wouldn't hesitate.

Kazuha was strong, but unlike the woman hunting them, he knew that she couldn't dodge bullets.

He didn't want to rob Heiji of anything else.

"Eh? Who?" Jodie blinked, a concerned look crossing her face. "Don't tell me that someone is being targeted by her? It's not those two who were trying to track them, is it?"

"That's a part of it." Shinichi told her. "But more importantly, she hasn't even been active in Japan for the past five years. There's plenty of other countries that have a more pressing need than Japan to try her for her crimes. Didn't she kill someone of rather high rank in America two years ago? A governor of some sort, if I recall correctly. The FBI has been getting some flak over that lately, since you haven't been able to produce the culprit, haven't you?"

"That's correct. It caused quite a panic at the time." Shuichi observed, gaze fixed on the head of the young man. He had caught a hint of it when he had spoken to his sister over the phone, but now that he was actually here, he could be sure of it- there was something that was being kept from them. More or less, he had a vague idea as to what it could be- there was one remaining Organization member who hadn't been mentioned yet. "While we were able to track down the person who hired them in the first place, we weren't able to track down Merlot themselves."

"Well, as long as the Japanese police have no issues with it, I suppose we don't either." Jodie said after a moment. "Of course, I'll have to contact James about the matter to make arrangements, but it should be more than possible."

"Good." Shinichi said, nodding his head. "There's actually another matter I need to speak with you about once all of this is over, Jodie-san."

"Eh? Another matter?" Jodie inquired, a slight frown on her face. "Come to think of it, Kudo-kun, you haven't once mentioned that pupil of Merlot's. Does it have something to do with that?"

"A traitor, perhaps." Shuichi observed, carefully gauging the reactions of those sitting up front, the small way that they both flinched. "For assisting in the capture of both Gin and Merlot, and finally bringing a close to the Organization, he's asking for some kind of deal, isn't he?"

"Yeah, something like that." Shinichi said after a moment. That had hit a bit too close to the truth there- even though he was the one asking for the deal, not Paikaru himself. Still, since they had brought him up like he thought they would, he couldn't exactly lie to them. "Right now, I haven't told him I've contacted the FBI just yet, so if at all possible, I want to avoid the three of you meeting until the matter is dealt with."

"Can you really trust him though?" Shuichi asked, slightly arching his brows. It was a bit curious that someone who could be as paranoid as Kudo Shinichi had so freely welcomed an Organization member into their midst, during such a difficult operation- although if his guess wasn't wrong, the Organization member in question was probably the cause of the current operation.

"I can trust him." Shinichi said simply. "There's no one else who despises Merlot more than him, I can assure you of that much, at the very least. As for the rest... well, I'll explain that to you later. It's something of a complicated situation."

"Well, if that's your judgement, Kudo-kun, I see no reason to oppose it." Jodie said after a moment. There was definitely something more to this, that much she could sense. "But I don't know if we'll be able to arrange a deal or not either way. At the very least though, I would be willing to hear you out, and to meet him, if that's what you want. We do owe you quite a bit, after all."

"Thank you, Jodie-san." Shinichi said simply. "And you as well, Akai-san, for coming out all this way on such short notice. Hopefully there won't be a situation in which we'll end up needing your sniping skills, but it's better safe than sorry. We can't allow them to create any more victims than they already have."

"Don't worry, Kudo-kun." Jodie told him, giving him a small smile. He really had grown up quite a bit since the last time she had seen him- and she didn't mean just in height. "In the event that they try anything, we'll make sure to handle it properly. You can concentrate on what you need to in order to capture them. It's high time we bring an end to their nightmare once and for all."

"Ya will let me know if somethin' happens, right?"

"Ah, well, that's..." Trailing off a little, Kaito took a slight step back, wondering what he could do to escape this situation. While it might not be often that someone managed to corner Kaito Kid, Kuroba Kaito was a different story entirely.

Granted, he was used to the one doing the cornering being Aoko- and not a rather insistent young woman with an Osakan accent. He could sort of understand the reason why she had approached him, and not Hakuba, in spite of having worked with him for these past five years or so. He would probably be the easier of the two of them to convince.

"Ya will, won't ya, Kuroba-han?" Kazuha asked again, taking another step forward for his step back, folding her arms in front of her chest. In spite of being clearly shorter than him, for a moment, it almost felt as if she was towering over him- this woman could seriously be scary if she wanted to be! "If somethin' happens ta Heiji, or if somethin' looks like it's gonna happen ta Heiji, I wanna be the first person ta know about it."

"And what would you do if I told you that much, Toyama-san?" Kaito asked. The only thing stopping him from scooting back any further was the wall behind him. Still, he managed to somewhat keep his composure- or at the very least, a respectable amount of it. "You should understand the reasons why Kudo-kun decided not to put you with us in the first place."

"Of course I understand them." Kazuha said simply, heaving a long, drawn out sigh. "But that doesn't mean that I agree with them, or that I have ta completely accept them. The only reason I'm not outright objectin' ta them is because I know that Kudo-kun's plans usually are the best there are. I'll do my part as I'm required, but Heiji's my childhood friend, an' I don't wanna risk losin' him again this time."

"Well, that I can understand, but..." Trailing off a little, Kaito took in and let out a deep breath, realizing that she wasn't going to give in. "Well, I suppose I can contact you if it looks like there's any serious trouble. As long as you agree that you're not just going to charge in recklessly if something like that happens. Kudo-kun and Mouri-san might be in trouble if you're not there when they need you, after all."

"Good!" With a firm nod of her head, a pleased smile crossed Kazuha's face, taking two steps back to give him some breathing room. "That's what I wanted ta hear! Thank ya, Kuroba-han!"

Watching as she headed back down towards the living room, apparently satisfied with his promise, Kaito couldn't help but feel as if he had just had five years taken off his life. An intimidating aikido master cop, and a former detective turned assassin- what a pair of childhood friends they were.

"Oh, there ya are, Kudo-han!" Glancing up from the magazine that he had begun flipping through out of boredom, Paikaru found a smile crossing his face as a face that was now slowly starting to become familiar to him returned. Since he wanted to speak with him as soon as he got back, he had decided that waiting by the door would be best. "I was startin' ta get a bit bored, waitin' fer ya!"

"I can gather that much from your choice of magazines." Shinichi noted, glancing down towards the one in his hand, watching with a slight smile as Paikaru tossed it back down on the table. That was definitely one of Ai's. "Been investigating the latest trends?"

"Well, somethin' like that. Apparently red heels are really hot this year!" Paikaru informed him, getting to his feet. Well, he had only grabbed it because it was in arm's reach, and he didn't feel like going to get anything else. There wasn't much else to distract himself with here- if he had known it was going to be like this, he wouldn't have gone through all of those novels Shinichi had given him so quickly. "But it took ya long enough! Ya done discussing things about the comin' days with the police?"

"Yeah, pretty much. I left Sera-san there to deal with the rest." Shinichi told him. He wasn't really lying, so much as he was omitting a few details. It was probably for the best that things were going to be rather busy in the coming day or two, however long it would take for Gin and Merlot to track them here. There was a look in Heizo's eyes that told him that there was something that he wanted to discuss with him, and Shinichi had taken that as his cue to make his quickest exit out of there that he could. "If the Organization tries anything tomorrow to take up the attention of the police, they should be prepared."

"Ah, that old man really likes those kind of tactics." Paikaru observed, folding his arms in front of his chest. "Well, Merlot has always been more straightforward though."

"So you've told me." Shinichi said. "I'm counting on you tomorrow, Paikaru. You're the only one of us who really knows anything about that woman. You can do it, right?"

"Well, I'll give it my best shot." Paikaru told him, shrugging his shoulders. "That's about all I can say. It would be easier if ya'd let me kill her, but..." Realizing those words were a mistake as soon as they left his mouth, he frowned, reaching up to rub the back of his neck. "I suppose it can't be helped. She needs ta properly face trial, right? Can't really do that if she's dead."

"Yeah, that's right." With a rather curt nod of his head, Shinichi let out the breath that had caught for a moment in his throat. He could only hope that there would come a time when he would hear such words come so easily from him. Jodie was certainly right- even if the FBI did owe him quite a bit for what he had done in the past, arranging a good deal for Heiji wasn't going to be that easy.

Still, he had to try. It was his fault that he was in this situation in the first place.

"...Sorry." The words almost came out as a whisper, to the point where he wasn't quite sure he had even spoken them. Once it was out in the open, it felt as if it were something that he had been needing to say for a long time- even if it was inadequate for the scale of the apology needed. "I didn't mean ta say somethin' like that in front of ya. I'm probably not at all what ya'd hoped I'd been when ya heard I was still alive, huh?"

"Well, considering the other option was that Hattori betrayed me, in a way, this is almost better." Shinichi said after a moment, giving him something of a sad smile. "One way or another, I'm just glad that you're still alive. It would be nice if you tried to stay that way."

"Well, I'll do my best." Paikaru said after a moment, scratching his cheek, once again finding that he didn't quite know what to say in these situations. If he pulled through this, he was going to have to put some hard work into developing his social skills. "I could say the same about you, Kudo-han. We've only just started ta get ta know each other, an' it would be a shame if ya weren't around if my memories ever come back, seein' how important this Hattori Heiji was ta ya. That Neechan sounds like she's pretty much lookin' forward ta that weddin' of yers as well. Ya probably shouldn't disappoint her."

"I've already had cause to disappoint her for far too long as it is already. I have no intention of doing that anymore." Shinichi said simply, closing his eyes and shaking his head. Leaving Ran alone again wasn't an option, no matter what.

"Well, whatever the case, be careful." Paikaru said after a moment, averting his gaze from him. Just like his exchange with Kazuha had been earlier, he couldn't get rid of this awkward feeling. He really had no experience with this type of thing. The idea that there were people out there who could actually care about him- even if they probably cared more about who he had been than who he was now, was still surreal to him.

He didn't know if that would ever change. Perhaps if his memories returned... but perhaps not. Something inside of him had gotten twisted along the way, and he didn't know if that was something that could ever be fixed.

"Are you worried about me?" Shinichi couldn't help but ask. "I'm honored. Especially considering our first interaction involved you threatening my life."

"Ah, now that ya mention it, somethin' like that did happen..." Paikaru trailed off a little, once more finding a hand straying up to his cheek. "Sorry about that too, I guess."

"Well, to be fair, I was kind of riling you up at the time." Shinichi noted. "And it wouldn't be the first time something like that has happened in my line of work. Speaking of which..." taking a few steps forward so that he could stand in front of Paikaru, he cast his eyes upwards, locking his own with his. Perhaps it was just because he had the chance to get to know him a little better, but no longer did he feel like there was some kind of unknown stranger behind those eyes.

They still belonged to Hattori Heiji, his best friend and rival. He just wasn't the same as he was before. He was already starting to come to terms with this fact. For as much as things had changed- there were still plenty of things that had remained the same.

"I contacted someone who might be able to help strike a deal in your favor, Paikaru. Granted, we don't have much bargaining power in our hands considering your crimes, but at the very least, I don't intend to allow you to face the same fate as Merlot's other pupils." It was the first time he had ever said this straight out- and judging from the look in his eyes, Paikaru knew exactly what he meant. "I'm not sure what more I can do for you beyond that, though."

"Well, that's ta be expected. I've done more than enough ta make 'em lock me away an' throw away the key. Just gettin' ta keep my life already sounds pretty good." With a slight shrug of his shoulders, Paikaru took a step back, tucking his hands into his pockets. It hadn't been that long ago that he actually thought it was a valid idea that he might be forgiven for his crimes if he assisted in bringing down the other two- but the longer he spent here, around these people, the more he came to understand what a foolish notion that was.

The more time he spent around them, the more that he had cause to cautiously unlock the things that Merlot had locked away inside of him. Some of them, only just a crack- things that weren't needed for an assassin, things that Paikaru had no need for. Things that prevented him, in a way, from become a proper human being- making him nothing more than an incomplete empty shell with a hashed together personality. They were necessary for a human, but for an assassin, such things were unimportant.

And the more he began to unlock those things, the more he fully came to understand the magnitude of what it was that he had been doing. While he had always carried it with him to some extent- never being able to forget their names, nor their faces, in some cases not even their dying moments- he had been rather numb to it all, in the end. But bit by bit, piece by piece, that numbness was slowly starting to come undone. More and more, he was coming to understand why he would never be allowed to escape with the things he had done, not even by those who had treasured him in the past, even those willing to accept him as he was now, for reasons he couldn't understand.

The empty shell with no memories and no real name was slowly becoming something like a proper human, he supposed.

It felt terrible. He hated it.

It was also important.

"I'm sorry, Hattori." The name slipped out from him before he could stop it, but the one before him didn't flinch, so he didn't take it back. Perhaps he was apologizing to the memory of him, really- as he had once been, that hotblooded, quick to grin idiot who had wormed his way into his life, only to disappear from it far too quickly. "Once this is all over, there's a limit to the things that I'll be able to do for you. In the end, regardless of circumstances, regardless of blame, you still have to pay for the things that you've done."

"Yeah." Closing his eyes, turning on his heel, Paikaru once again found himself wondering what kind of expression he was making. "I know that. But ya, Kudo-han, ya really shouldn't keep blamin' yerself fer all of this like ya do."

Opening his eyes and glancing back, this expression, at the very least, was one that Paikaru was coming to know- a broad smile that felt like it had once come naturally to him. "I might not know this Hattori Heiji of yers all that well, but at the very least, I get the feelin' that even knowin' what might happen, he'd probably still make the same decision ta go with ya. It ain't yer fault."

And come as early as tomorrow, they would finally deal with the one whom all the blame lay with.

Merlot.