Alumni Advice Bulletin
Kirishima Shouko, the representative of the alumni of the batch 20XX-XX will address the student bodies who are having difficulties of obtaining or maintaining standards of the school especially within the Fumizuki Academy. The first question was submitted by the initials N.H. which written as:
"Dear Kirishima-senpai,
I am a distressed class representative who wants the men of my class to be well disciplined one. I have tried every action written in the school regulations book in order to restrain them but it failed countless times. Please help my distressed mind and provide me options. Thank you for taking time to read this urgent request. –N.H."
Kirishima Shouko's reply:
To N.H., who is a representative of a class well known, I have checked your class and find to only have 1 male in your records. For that, I suggest the book of XXX and XXX for your X & X needs of restraint. If not, I shall pass this to the late president of a famous group of your class seniors to provide proper attitude and discipline to that certain male student.
Sugawa Ryo's reply:
I will provide you a review class on what we always do since you have seem to forgotten the scope of our capabilities. One heretic shall never hinder the disciplinary actions of our group and so you shall provide a strong power to defeat this threat against you. I wish you good luck for this year and may discipline your members well.
The Idiot, Punishment, and the inquisitors
"Aki-kun…"
Came a whisper to my ear, my head feels so heavy and so are my eyes, I just mumble trying to response to the owner of the voice.
"mmm…"
"Aki-kun, it's time for you to wake up!"
Is it morning already? Heck, my body won't even budge if you tell me: my chest is so heavy as if someone's pinning on me with their body, my arms and legs are the same as well. My face felt a cold breeze of the owner's breath as if she's approaching me like I'm sort of a prey ready to be feast on.
"Aki, if you don't wake up, Nee-san would do some naughty things to you."
At that moment, as if something jolted into my body into realization. My nee-san, Yoshii Akira, would act this way every time I don't respond to her call just to get me. This is really bad, if I react a second later, I would end up as the worst pervert in history that would match up with the most perverted person in world history. I shot my eyes open and looked down at my situation and just screamed out at the top of my lungs as I saw that's something inevitable. She managed to pin me down with no chance to escape.
"OKAY! OKAY! I'M UP! STOP IT, NEE-SAN! STOP! STOP! NOOOOOOOOOoooooo….!"
I already dressed up after that unfortunate incident; I took a glance at my nee-san who was wiping her lips in satisfaction of the meal I had prepared for us.
"Nee-san…would you please stop all these nonsense? I'm already third year student and about to graduate."
"That would be an invalid request, Aki."
"And why is that?"
"You forgot to say 'If you do, I'd be happy to do anything you want after graduation.'…"
"I-I thought so…" I just can't argue with her…It's been like this for a year already. She first came here just to come and check up on me but now she's almost like a freeloader to my life. I CAN'T STAND IT!
"Anyways, once this school is over, I agreed to go to America so you can go ahead and wait for me there." Because I applied myself in a University in Boston, Nee-san told me she would take me there to look at those schools.
"Then, nee-san won't be able to become a good bride to Aki-kun…Nee-san is so sad that she might show the internet Aki-kun's maid uniform pictures."
"Wait! What the hell?! Where, or rather, when did you managed to get these?" In these pictures, it seems she managed to capture of me sleeping in maid's clothing.
"Nee-san slipped off Aki-kun's pajama and helps him put it on."
"DON'T PUT ANY MORE DAMAGE TO MY ALREADY DAMAGED REPUTATION!"
"But Nee-san worked so hard…*sniff sniff*" Nee-san sobbed wiping her tears with a napkin on her hand.
It would be a good scenario to comfort her if it weren't for the fact that my manliness is on the line for this situation. It's been a year yet she still made my home some sort of a cosplay studio.
I can only heave a sigh in defeat for this insane argument as I looked at the time. It's still 6:30 A. M., I probably have time to get to school. But why did I get the feeling there's something amiss?
"Aki-kun, nee-san forgot something to tell you."
"Mhmm…What is it now nee-san?" as I sipped some water to clear my throat from the meal we just ate. That must be something unimportant for her to forget it so easily.
"The clock you just looked at stopped working yesterday. It's already 7:40 AM."
BUWOOOOSH! Cough! Cough!
I spat out the water that I just drank like a fountain at that sudden announcement. I can't believe she would just tell me that the clock is broken a long time ago without even a hint of warning.
"TELL ME THAT SOONER, IDIOT NEE-SAN!"
I immediately hurried my things as I dashed to the front door, wearing my shoes along the way.
"Nee-san, I'm off! I left some food for your lunch in the fridge. AND DON'T GO INTO MY ROOM!"
"Be safe on your trip. And I will go to Aki's room"
"LISTEN TO WHAT PEOPLE ARE SAYING!"
"Yoshii, You're late again!"
"URGH! I-Iron- I mean…Nishimura-sensei."
"This is your final year, so remember my name properly. Otherwise, I shall give you, my favorite student, a special remedial class with your name on it."
*Crack! Crack!*
"I don't think being labeled as your 'favorite student' gives me an advantage perk, sensei."
This guy doesn't even give a hint of hope for me, with his knuckles cracking in front of his student. HEY! A student shouldn't be presented with this kind of treatment!
"If you think you shouldn't be given this kind of treatment, you thought wrong."
Tch! Why is it I'm easy to read? I can't understand it.
"As a Punishment Inspector (Probationary Student) you are, not only supervised by us, the teachers but also we can give punishment accordingly in case there is an action which degrade your idiot status. Like right now that you're late."
"Yes yes, I'm sorry that I am late, I had something to do at home before we graduate." I can't tell him that a family member had been sexually harassing me because he might treat it as a way to torture me.
"Good! Before you go to the classroom, You and your summon being will carry some things for me." He announced as he gave me his usual demonic grin. I don't like the looks of this at all.
"Also…it seems your suffering would soon be over." As he looked to the top of the cherry blossom trees slowly turning the fields into pink yet not a single petal or leaf has dropped to the freshly mowed green grass. Yes…Time has indeed passed by. From my entrance to this school, my first encounter with new people who are now my closest people, some reunion with some people, the placement exams, the summoned being wars. It has been…what can I say, a fun year.
"Yoshii, if you're trying to sneak in while I'm enjoying this view, then do it more quietly…oh and don't skip the task I have given you, Alright? Have a good year."
TCH! Damn you, Ironman!
I approached the 3-F classroom like usual. This is the last few weeks before our graduation so I think I should do something with my high-school life but… I never had a girlfriend though... nor had a decent conversation with one.
ARGH! Damn it! All of my years of youth, wasted with these bunch of idiots who know nothing but killing each other when someone has a girl. If Hideyoshi would just come into my arms, I would take care of her like a bird and never let anyone have her like a very precious gemstone. So pure…So innocent…Though she always claims she's a he.
I gave a deep sigh as muttering something this nonsense cruelty of the world to my thoughts would just lead me nowhere that I wish that the earth would stand still for me to still plan things into action.
Suddenly, the door shut wide open and there before me is the ugliest face known to the demon kind w
ho is seemed to be in a desperate attempt to flee from something vicious.
"Y-yuuji?"
"OUTTA MY WAY AKIHISA!" Replied as he pushed me to the side and began running down the hall. I wonder what why he's so panicky?
"There he is! Sakamoto Yuuji's on the move! Capture him immediately!" cried the person commanding the black hood battalion to spread out to capture the notorious villain known within the class, the class representative. Funny, I felt sympathy towards that guy. I walked inside and it seems they are preparing for his punishment.
"So, what's Yuuji's in charge of, Sugawa?" I asked the leader of the group to fill me in on the details of this particular hunt.
"We had received report from a very reliable source that a woman had been staying inside Sakamoto's house last weekend…" By woman, I bet they are all referring to Kirishima-san visiting his house to make sure he won't back down to his words last year. But for the source of their report, I wonder who is it from?
"…the source of the information only gave us his initials of Y. A." hmm…that's a good informant. Well, I better get my hood on to chase that vile heretic.
I took out the hood out of my bag followed by my portable Scythe, disguised as a metric ruler when all of a sudden.
"Leader! Leader!"
"What is it, Murisaki?"
"We had received new information!" I got myself busy in preparing the tools for punishment. Now…what should I use on that bastard?
"Fire it away!"
"We had another heretic in among us!" Huh? Another one? Poor fellow, I feel sympathy for him. Now, should I use the flaming steak? Or these spiked bucket gloves? Or perhaps…
"What another one?"
"Yes sir! We had reports of a person living with a woman and they are doing 'strange' stuff together."
"""WHAAAAAAT!""" We all cried in synchrony. Inconceivable! There's no way a guy who sleeps with a girl can be within this group! NEVER!
"This report came from a person who gave only his initials S. Y. and the target…Is YOSHII AKIHISA!"
As I heard the perpetrator's name being announced, I dropped everything I had in my hand as everything in the room went silent.
""…""
…
""…""
…
And in that single moment, all eyes slowly turned towards me.
S.Y….that can only mean one thing…
"Sakamoto Yuuji…"
Is the only thing I can only mutter…
""Yoshii Akihisa…""
"…you…"
…Because in all of this…
"""Kill Akihisa! Kill the HERETICS!"""
…the only thing I can do at this moment…
"…BASTARD!"
…Was run…because…
BOOM! Takatakatakataka!
""…Kill him! Kill HIM! KILL HIM!""
…no one would ever believe you now…
"Start searching, Don't stop until you have found those two deserters!"
""YES!""
Takatakatakataka…
Phew! I managed to escape from death from now. They won't expect a guy going into the ladies restroom.
"Tch! It's a shame that you managed to escape."
"Yuuji!" I reacted. This guy managed to find me out that easily.
"What are you doing here?" I inquired
"I should be asking the same thing to you. Why did you gave them that non-sense information?"
"What did you mean non-sense information? Those information are the proof of my hard work of having you get killed for all the years you have betrayed us. But…the one should be having that question IS YOU!"
"What?!"
We argued for a few minutes in the restroom like a pair of cats and dogs until finally Yuuji called the quits.
"URGH! Enough! If we continue arguing like this, those guys will definitely find us out sooner or later."
Hate to admit this situation but he's right though. With the FFF after us, we need to get out of this situation before they realize that something's up.
"But how do we get out of here?" I inquire, there's nothing like an air vent to get us out and crawl our way back to the class room without those idiots noticing us.
"hmm…lets see." Yuuji muttered as he began fiddling his phone.
"Who are you calling to, Yuuji?"
"Someone who can help us."
At times like these, this guy is like a very hard boss of a video game, sending strategic waves of monsters to do his demonic bidding. For two years I have known this guy for having a knack of going against the laws of strategic common sense in order for him to conquer his goal. But to whom is he asking for help from? And who would support this crazy bastard?
"Heya guys! I'm the idiot who always support the crazy bastard, Yuuji!"
Eh?! Just now, I just heard a familiar voice but I can't recognize who was it…It was a voice so stupid to be heard that with just that, you can easily tell that that person's an idiot. And was that a confession of the allegiance?! Who's dumb enough to say to the whole bunch of crown you're helping a moron like him!?
"There he is! The idiot, Yoshii Akihisa."
That can't be right…My voice isn't that stupid and I'm not supporting this bastard next to me!
"Wait! It might be someone else who can have the same voice as him"
"But there's no mistake on it, his stupid voice is so stupid that with just that, you can easily tell that that person's an idiot."
Hey! That's an insult resulting to injury.
"There's no use thinking about it, idiot. That was Hideyoshi imitating your voice."
Wait! So my cute Hideyoshi has come to save me? But what would he get for coordinating with a demon?
"In any case, he managed to buy us some time to get outta here. Before they realized it was a trap" Yuuji muttered as he went out of the bathroom.
I can't believe this guy would just do such a thing but something does bother me.
"Yuuji, do I really have a kind of idiotic voice like that?"
Depending on his answer will reveal the course of action I should take.
"No…You have an idiotic face to go with that idiotic voice and to put it off, you have a brain to match both of them."
This guy doesn't hold back, does he? Guess I have to do the same and finish him off here and now.
"…But…" He managed to stop me with his words as if there's a positive side of it.
"…There was a reason that I have an 'Ace' on my sleeve." This guy…knows how to make another guy cry.
"Alright Yuuji, you got me. Let's get back to the classroom." Because during class, that's the place where it's safest since that Ironman would be strictly guarding us.
"Uhm…Yuuji…What's with all of this?"
I asked Yuuji who managed to bind me and tossed me into a fiery pit of hell of the inquisition.
"It's obvious you fool, this was an entrapment to get you out of hiding."
"WHAT?!"
I just got betrayed within a minute after forming an alliance with this bona fide jerk?!
"It was easy. After you sent your information regarding my capture, I immediately used my information which also has some proof."
He pulled out a recorder that seems to indeed have captured a very valuable information. But valuable as it may be, can it be true?
"'Can it be true?' you may have wondered but let's just see how you fare this?"
He pressed the play button and silence came to the crowded area, the only voice we heard was that of the static sound of the recorder until…
"Aki-kun…" "Aki-kun, it's time for you to wake up!" "Aki, if you don't wake up, *Beep* would do some naughty things to you."
"OKAY! OKAY! I'M UP! STOP IT, *Beep*! STOP! STOP! NOOOOOOOOOoooooo….!"
This scene…Isn't this came from this morning? DAMN IT! I let my guard down too much for this.
"From the looks of things, it seems this idiot can't deny it. Also your information doesn't float too well so I managed to discuss with them a plot that would just capture you in the most miserable way as possible. Having them to fake chase me, then had someone to go repeat that information was a signal for you to run and meet me in one of our hiding spots. Then all I have to do is take you back with me."
Grr…This bastard is lower than an earthworm crawling underneath the earth's surface.
"Didn't you say you had a reason to keep an Ace like me under your sleeves?"
I stared into his eyes with all of my determination to know the truth of the words he gave to me.
"Huh? What did you mean you are my ace?"
"EH? Didn't you say that I am a secret weapon for the summoner test war?"
"True, but I am not applying it now. You are a guy who can't be underestimated when it comes to stupidity."
Praise and insult, why does this scenario always give me surprises?
"Also, I never did say you're my ace under my sleeve although you are an ace I can discard to these guys."
W-what?! I'm expendable!
"We'll begin the trial now…"
Is this the end?
"…gather all the others. Yoshii Akihisa."
Does this mean this bastard's going to win; he who has won my trust then threw it out so easily?
"Do you have your wish before the punishment would be executed?"
LIKE HELL I WOULD!
"I do…MITSURINI!"
"…Roger!"
"W-what?! GUAH!"
Tak! Tak! Tak!
Thud! Thud! Thud!
Pieces of paper fell and stabbed the people's head as if they're shuriken. Mitsurini's skill has improved once more…but a little too much…What's with the killing intent on those attacks?!
"Ow! What the hell are these?"
"My head hurts like hell, what is this thing stuck to our heads."
As soon as they started to recover from the strike, Yuuji wondered what I had Mitsurini do.
"Oi, Akihisa! What the hell are you up to?"
"Fufu…It seems you didn't know why my story can sink, Yuuji."
I chuckled as it seems Yuuji's became scared of his situation now.
"…It's because, that story is a submarine that can surface at anytime…"
The moment I said it, they have pulled off the card off their heads and revealed the contents to themselves a huge uproar echoed throughout the room.
"WHAT THE HELL?!"
"T-This is?!"
Confusion and shock has reached into their minds as they all look to the images at their sides to confirm that they all had the same message. That bad friend of mine has now become nervous of the situation as he looks down to see my grinning face.
"Hm?...What's the matter Yuuji? You seem to be surprised." I gave him a smirk as I try to make myself acting innocent towards this jerk who seems to be so high and mighty a while ago.
"Akihisa…You…" As he gave me a deadly glare as the band of hooded people one by one pin him down before he makes a move at me. The next thing I knew, I was covered with a bag and blacked out.
"Yoshii Akihisa…and Sakamoto Yuuji…2 of the most famous people who has outstanding accomplishment for us in Class F but has betrayed our blood-bound oath of ours for so long that it has become an intolerable pain for the inquisition to make you remain in the land of the living. Thus, we will ensure to send you to the afterlife by the punishment…Of the simultaneous punishments you have received so far plus new punishments from the new recruits of the inquisition. Don't worry, if you guys die mid-way through the execution, we can bring you guys back to life and resume the 'party'."
Ah…this explains why I see myself bound with this idiot on the minute hand of the school clock while a bunch of items used for punishment and control of the inquisition await for us down below along with the broken bungee cord attached to the rope on us which is covered with the scent of gasoline. These guys have decided to get rid of us, for real, this time.
"Wait! For what reason, am I charged with the same punishment as this guy?" I cried, there's no reason for them to suspect me with just an audio event of something as vague as that…It can be Kudou-san trying to mess the heads of the class F using a voice changer; She also knew about nee-san so there's a possibility to rule out off. But Sugawa, not only that he denied this plea of mine but also he simply just stared down at me like I'm sort of a bug slowly digging his own grave at an early life cycle.
"Hoo…Seems you still won't remember huh? Well…it doesn't matter, 'It' will wear off once we sent you to the afterlife, heretic."
"Huh?!"
It sounded that they have managed to erase a major event in my life that might anger these idiots.
But, confused as I am now, I need to get out of, what seemingly to be, the inescapable condition we are in. And to do that, 'WE' have to do 'IT' again.
I glanced at Yuuji as he seemed to have a ridiculous plan in mind. I have no other choice but to close my eyes and accept this crazy request.
"Ready!" the leader announced to the school speakers to prepare the executions down below as this seems to be our way to prepare ourselves, the minute hand slowly turn with our bodies attached to it close to the direction of our doom.
TIK! Snap!
"Begin Execution!"
"Let's go, Akihisa!"
"Likewise!"
Even though we are falling down towards a small pool full of electric eels, these guys won't be satisfied unless we are hit by 100 Stationary tools of death at the 4th floor; the 10 Spiked metal bats at the 3rd; and the classic 50 whips from the spiked whips…WHAT THE HELL IS WITH THIS SCHOOL'S SECURITY?! THERE'S MORE DEADLY WEAPONS THAN IT WAS BEFORE WHEN WE WERE SECOND YEARS!
"There's no other option we have in here, Akihisa! AWAKEN!"
I nod as we entered ourselves in Yuuji's Summoning field as we were falling. The FFF weren't informed of this and began to execute their punishments immediately as soon as we got close.
"Got it! SUMMON!" I called out at the top of my lungs. The familiar symbol appeared before me and soon appeared my summon beside me in the same position as I am.
"FIRE!" announced their commander and suddenly a 100 sharpened items came into our view. The fall might be fast for us but with the bungee cord, it'll slow us down immediately at the window itself, I can't risk us getting injured here.
"No you won't! DOUBLE!"
I cried out as a second Summoned being appeared beside the first and I tried my best to use both of them to block the items.
"The Heretics have managed to obtain a summoning field and now are blocking their punishments!" were the message being passed onto the others. It's too late now that we're falling at a fast rate!
we already passed the spiked bats with ease with my 'summon shield' and barely got hit by the sharp whips and we're only a few meters before the rope snap or even the pool of electric eels.
"Akihisa!"
"Gotcha!" I replied to Yuuji, my summons grabbed both sides of the foul scented rope that binds us and use all of my might to throw ourselves into the opened window of the first floor. Leaving only the summon beings fall into the pit of electrocution.
"Y-YEOUCH!"
I felt an immense voltage inside my body as both of my summons in the same dangerous situation caused my body to receive both of the harsh punishment as being the punishment inspector.
"Quit whining, Akihisa!"
"YOU TRY TO BE IN MY SHOES!"
"Ha? Why whould I try to be in the shoes of an idiot?!" Damn this guy! Why do I have to keep saving his sorry ass at this critical moment?
"There they are! After them!" cried one of the commanders. Tch! The managed to get down here so easily. But we're still bound together in the ropes.
"Shit! Akihisa, I'll run forward, let your legs go the opposite direction?"
"Why should I let you? I'll move forward" You might do something stupid as leaving me behind while running backwards as soon as you broke free.
"Look, Idiot! We don't have time to argue about this, just follow my lead and run backwards!"
"How can you expect me to do that easily?" Am I a reversing robot?!
With no time to argue further, that bastard began to move his legs and I'm already seeing my pursuers distancing as we left the room and down the halls.
"W-what the? It worked?!"
We are seriously moving faster than those idiots with just one of us running backwards?!
"huff! Huff! Geez Akihisa, you should eat some brain food, you only have that stomach of yours being my liability"
"HEY!" That's an awful way to say I'm getting fat.
"B-but what do we do Yuuji?"
"We have to take out this bind from us." He huffed in an exhausting manner which shows his hardships in saving us both.
"It's tough to cut this bond, Yuuji. For this represents the bond between us, our manly bond! The bond that we had experienced through the hardships of one man's sweat and hard work to support his comrade who is facing a delicate crisis like a fair maiden in distress; A bond in which trials are presented for it to be tested to its fullest capacity and to be th-" "I'm dropping you off now!" "-ngth of our – HEY! DON'T LEAVE ME!"
My beloved speech was cut off as my bad friend managed to release the bind and actually left me behind but thanks to my quick feet and reflex, I managed to get my heels and my toes back to their right direction.
"Damn you Yuuji!"
"Enough arguing, Akihisa! They're starting to catch up! We gotta split up in order to divide them and shake them loose much faster."
That is a very rational idea no matter how you think about it. Except…
""GET AKIHISA!""
"WE'LL GET AKIHISA NO MATTER WHAT IT TAKES!"
"GET THAT BASTARD, AND DON'T RETURN UNTIL YOU MANAGE TO BAG THAT IDIOT!"
If, for some reason we are to separate, there's no telling what'll happen if I get captured by these goons.
"We can't Yuuji. The risk (for me) is too much to handle."
"What are you talking about Akihisa? We're reaching the stairway, get ready to split up!"
He was determined to set the plan into action. If he has managed to make his resolve, then I have to be sure of my resolve.
"Alright Yuuji…NOT!" I cried as I followed him up stairs.
"Wh-What UWOOH!"
Tch! He managed to dodge my leg trip skills again. That bastard's getting sharper with each attack.
"Akihisa! *Tak!* Stop it! *Tak! Tak!* I'm not here to fight you with these idiots behind us! *Tak! Tak!*"
"Then just shut up *Tak! Tak!* and face your punishment! *Tak! Tak!*"
Blow after blow he managed to block and counter my trip attacks with his own. Damn him! He's completely willing to sacrifice me to these guys.
"""GET THEM! GET THE HERETICS!"""
"Tch! Akihisa, enough! I get your feelings now so let's solve this problem together okay?"
Usually this is where the part where I ignore this bastard's words and kept going attacking him without holding myself back. But this guy, in all of my years experiencing his capabilities, manage to handle all of the hardest situations with this look he have in his eyes. The eyes of his long thinking and strategizing options towards the given situation.
"There's only one option we have now, Akihisa."
"Wh-what is it Yuuji?"
"… We have to face, Ironman."
Ironman, also known as Nishimura Socchi, was the famous teacher for us in our stay in Fumizuki Academy…He's the guy who is even tougher than any athlete and taking down anyone we know. He's also handling Remedial classes for those who are…terminated…in the school to get back on their feet…I don't even know why I am capable of sugarcoating this lines.
"Why the hell we should call, Ironman?"
"Just trust me!"
I was hesitant to this option of his. But if this is the only way out of this, then there won't be a problem to it.
"Why should I send you to remedial class?"
Even though we managed to escape those idiots and reach to him safely towards the faculty office. There is still biggest idiot of them all to be the toughest one to face.
"W-we violated a school regulation!"
"Y-yeah! We violated the "No Intimate Relationships" in the school regulations!"
'No Intimate Relationships' school regulations? I feel that's familiar but that law only comes from the FFF and not from the school. How did Yuuji know of this particular regulation inside this school? Or was this a cover up lie since from other schools, which is a big offense.
"Hoo….I see….well unfortunately you idiots, you won't be able to come into my class for boldly claiming your guilty actions without even a hint from the outside surroundings."
Tch! Seems he sees through our lies.
""WE BEG OF YOU TO LET US IN!"" we prostate ourselves to the brink that we heard our spines crack from the immediate movement after the long running
"No! A remedial class' purpose is for the recovery of those students who didn't do well in their studies or lost their paths into following the school's regulation. It is not an 'escape route' for my 'students' to just waltz in and pretend you have committed something against the norms of this institution. Now if there are any more questions, you idiots know where to find me."
He gave us a cold shoulder as he left the faculty room with the two of us dumbfounded at his claim.
"He…He didn't 'get' us…"
"You don't have to repeat it, Akihisa…that bastard's toying with us…"
"Huh?!" I looked at Yuuji with my confused eyes, trying to figure out what he meant, but he himself opened his mouth and spoke his wishes.
"That guy knew about this and came up with a situation where we can't do anything in order for us to escape to him."
"Huh? 'Can't do anything'? " I looked up to him in confusion by what he meant by this.
"Usually, when we get into trouble, we always need time and manpower as we formulate this plan. As of now, we have neither time nor the manpower since all of them have turned against us. There's only the two of us with the 0% chance to take down those other idiots."
"Z-zero percent?" I stuttered, this is the first time I heard those words coming out of his mouth. And when he said it in that manner, it is completely true for him, that we may have impossibility in this situation.
"Akihisa, you know that I don't take chances where there's not even a 0.001% chance, right? So tell me…what can we do?... there's only one option for us, I tell you… We have to keep running away from those idiots until we find our ticket inside a safe zone."
So…that means that all we need is somewhere we can hide. But…If the Remedial class is unavailable for us, what room would be available? ...!...
"Yuuji…you said that we just need a 'safe room' right?" I muttered, he suddenly turned his head towards my direction in shock as if I had some sort of an insane and ridiculous idea.
"Y-Yes…t-that's right…have you got somewhere in mind?"
I nodded with confidence in my reply… 'Cause I did.
"Oi…Akihisa…Did you just threw me into the lion's den?"
"Yuuji…" I placed my hands onto his shoulders trying to send my supportive aura unto him.
"…a man must face all of the challenges to be able to reach his ultimate goal."
"You moron! What the hell is that sort of speech support the conditions we are not supposed to be blindly be crawling into. you're making us jump into a pit of very hungry and aggressive shark-filled tank!"
I don't care how he harasses me from here on, we're already in front of the class A class room so there's no turning back for us. But for some reason, I kept feeling a chill down my spine when I cross this room, this might be the right time to investigate this.
I raised my hand and gently knock on their elegant wooden door. The sound echoed through the hall…Good thing no one noticed us yet. The door slowly opened itself that if there was a creaking sound in it, it would make the best cliché in a horror film. Behind that slightly opened door was a face of a student muttering lowly to me.
"Have you brought 'the goods'."
I grabbed Yuuji by his neck collar who was about to escape with my left hand and raised a plastic bag with my other.
"Yup!" I replied with confidence. The student slowly hid himself as he pulled more of the door open for us to enter in. The blinding light of the room illuminated us as we entered in, preparing ourselves to the doors to heaven.
"W-What the hell happened?" Yuuji's in a state of disbelief for the class A we have been trying to compete against in their room; The class A that have been known as the strongest class in our batch; The class in a room where our sight of heaven is currently in is…
"Don't attack yet, I have still yet to learn about the special attacks of this character!"
"This anime is defined to them as 'bad ass' is really bad ass."
"The quality of this manga is so detailed, the characters seemed to appear as if they're coming out of each page." " UWOOOOH!"
…Have become idiots….well…temporarily…
"Akihisa…what's going on?"
"Allow me to answer in his stead, Sakamoto Yuuji." Standing proud as ever and still holding his title of being the school's valedictorian, is Toshimitsu Kubo, as he approached us in his still refined manner but something in his aura just giving me the goose bumps still…or was it the people surrounding him?
"Since we have a week-long ceasefire in our agreement, we planned on studying how did F-class managed to get close to us each time, so we are conducting a study on F-class' culture in order for us to know how to 'outsmart' you guys. And Yoshii Akihisa here is willing to help us with his video games."
For some reason, Yuuji and Kirishima-san raised a week long cease fire in our attempt to capture the class 3-A room. And according to my resources (FFF and Mitsurini), there seems to be a wedding being planned by both of them at the end of the school and this might be a way for me to figure out the situation.
"Oi! Akihisa! What's the meaning of this?! Surrendering the life and blood of the class to the enemy?!" Yuuji growled as he grabbed my collar to let me see his serious face however…
"…Yuuji, isn't this a chance for us as well?" I muttered that only he and I could only hear.
"Eh?!" I leaned close to his ear and gave to him my dark intention.
"We get to immobilize some of the A class by means of our own weakness used against them. If we happen to find their weaknesses here, we can apply it on them and besides…" In a surprised face, Yuuji pulled his head to look at me in a confused manner. Seems this guy don't get my intention. I will lay all my cards to him now.
"We might have the room with Class A since I'm offering a sacrifice to the goddess…"
Yuuji's face suddenly turned pale in horror and surprise as the door immediately closed in behind us like what you would expect in a horror film.
"Damn! I need to get out of here!" the Ruby haired idiot panicked as he tries to run for the entrance of the room but what came to surprise him, was a maiden of fair beauty and intellect to boot, staring at him with utmost seriousness in her face. Stabbing more fear into the eyes of my partner.
"…Yuuji."
Her gentle voice echoed from the entrance, Yuuji's whole body shivered with either fright or fear but one thing I know for sure, he's in big trouble.
"S-Shouko…H-hi! Uhm…I should get going." He tried to escape but I happen to block it and with my gentle manner, I bowed before the goddess.
"Kirishima-san, I, Yoshii Akihisa, offer you the blood and heart of my ultimate sacrifice, Sakamoto Yuuji. And to prove my worth as your humble aide, I give you this!" I reached for a piece of paper behind my back and presented it to Kirishima-san, from the sight of her face, she was quite pleased causing Yuuji to be more cautious than ever.
"O-oi! Akihisa! What did you gave Shouko?" he stuttered. I gave him an honest reply. "Your doomsday device." Kirishima-san flushed red as he approached Yuuji revealing the paper in her hand to him then cuddles to her side with a attempted cutesy tone which doesn't fit for her character "…We are married now…"
It was a marriage contract with Yuuji's signature on it.
"You bastard! How dare you use me as your scapegoat?!" He cursed from the depths of his soul but I simply shook my head in feign ignorance and answered him.
"You are not my scapegoat, you are my dealer chip."
"Huh?!"
"There are two conditions that I asked Kirishima-san in my trade. A set of photos I personally like and…" I grinned and muttered my second demand to him, his face grew from an angry beast, to a fearful domestic pet. "My name will be cleared from today until the school year finally ends…which means, I am an innocent guy on my graduation and you, Sakamoto Yuuji, will not only have a 'happily ever after' not your own way but the FFF will recognize you in our reunion." Though my head are a bit confused but I think I muttered something about saying a happy ending in accordance with Yuuji's way but it might be because Yuuji is also in love with Kirishima-san but he doesn't have the guts to do it…Speaking of which…how did I know Yuuji even likes her? I always remember Yuuji being afraid of her and even said a couple of harsh things, but what is this uneasiness that I forgot some parts of my life that tells another story of the people around me?!
I shook my head and just resume my duties, I kept an eye of those idiots outside not to try take sight of both of us in this classroom as we enjoy the luxury of class A's equipment to it's fullest…that has ended though when a certain person's twin and the reason we go for that certain person after being rejected by this person's twin. She stood proud with pride being the person to be Kirishima-san's right hand in commanding the war these passed summoner test wars. I too had a fair share of encountering her.
"President! I will not allow this sight of class A. As of this moment, this might be a way for the class F to wreck the foundation of our institution and also the morale of the students. As class A, we must maintain a good example to the students and-" "…Yuuji…Ahh!" "provide an outstanding results for the school and our ben-" "O-oi Shouko! W-we can't yet do-WUAHRGH!" "… Urgh!" at that moment, Kinoshita-san gave up to confront her class president as she wasn't listening to every statement she muttered out but rather…I can sympathize her since the sight before us isn't to be done within any schools.
"S-Shouko! Stop it! There are a lot of people here!"
"…I don't mind."
…That…isn't that a famous line but with the roles reversed?
"P-President!" with her face flushed with anger and embarrassment, she gave up in retaliating and turned to face me with full force of a lion pouncing on a helpless prey. "Y-you!..."
"N-Now, Ki-Kinoshita-san…th-there is a pretty good explanation to all these events, but I can assure you, I am not (directly/indirectly) involved in this matter" I prayed hoping that this might quench the burning flame of death within her eyes. But I was wrong; It actually added gasoline to the flame as she's more than eager to get rid of me as much as possible. I was shivering from my head, down to the micro fibers of my body at the intense pressure but I made a resolution to hide in this place I approached her slowly and gritted my teeth trying to punch every fear and imagination I have in my head and tilt the upper half of my body into a 90 degree angle.
"I AM SORRY!"
"Wh-wha?!" I couldn't tell how she reacted but her shock was enough to make me resume my apology.
"In truth, this was actually Yuuji's idea as a way to get information but I only wanted it as a peace treaty between the classes"
"O-oi!" retorted the blasphemous person of the academic society. I cannot help but gave a sigh of embarrassment of his situation of taking advantage of Kirishima's love for him. It is completely a total waste.
"Hmph! I will forgive you for now…" I am saved by an angel now who resembles a lot like Hideyoshi.
"…But!..." I am conflicted though by temptation and loyalty.
"…If I see you trying to earn my trust through various means for the sake of war and such. Prepare the same fate as my dear little brother's, Hideyoshi, class 3-F Akihisa Yoshii." And now I am taken to hell by a demon who resembles a lot like Hideyoshi. Oh why have you forsaken me, god?!
She turned around with disgust, probably on her decision as Kirishima's right hand commander to allow her opponent to be in the premises of their command center. I can understand too but right now we need a place to hide against those idiots outside who are waiting for us with scythes, stationary weaponry.
""IS YOSHII AKAHISA AND SAKAMOTO YUUJI HERE?!""
A demonic like voice went booming from the door of the class A entrance, I leapt forward in order to conceal my presence of this infernal demons it's as if the class room door were the main definition of the gates of hell.
""PRESENT THEIR HEADS AND WE SHALL FORGIVE YOU! REFUSE TO PRESENT THEM AND YOU ALL SHALL PERISH WITH THEM! PERISH WITH THEM!""
The roars of the angry mob of black hood and scythe wielding are making the room shake with a force never accomplished by normal means alone…If they're this motivated, where did this motivation gone to in times of need in the summoner test war?
"Y-Yoshii Akihisa!"
"Hm?"
I heard a voice coming from below me, followed by a soft sensational feeling of soft yet firm object are underneath my hands, like a soft pillow.
"W-What is this?"
I gave it a gentle squeeze with both hands and I felt some sort of elasticity on them yet they are really firm.
"KYAAAAAAHHH!"
I didn't know what happened after that but all I know is that I went out like a light as soon as I realized something that I touched…that's right…it was Kinoshita-san's…
I saw the idiot was given a 1-hit KO from second-in-command's commanding fist though I don't think the nosebleed is from the impact of her fist or something else. But, priority straightened, I have to handle my own situation first.
"S-Shouko?"
"…what is it, Yuuji?"
With her eyes dead locked on me like a heat seeking missile that follows me wherever I try to dodge it. I have to think of a way to squirm my way out of this nonsensical situation. With more trouble also is that those bastard idiots are howling at the door like a bunch of dogs waiting for their meals to be given to them. But how to solve both of them with just a short period?...
"S-Shouko, we have some disturbing neighbors at the door. Could you guide them away from this place for me?"
I bet she won't even comply in this stupid favor it's highly suspicious that-
"…anything for you."
"PFFFFFFFTTTT!" WHAT THE HELL?! SHE FELL FOR IT?! Does she ever learn how aggressive I am when it comes to evasion?! Wait?! What the hell am I saying?! This should be a perfect time for me to find a way out of this mess that damn idiot has put us through!
She gently lifted herself up and went straight immediately at the door. Now's my chance.
""LET THE TRAITORS OUT! THEY SHOULD BE ELIMINATED! BANISHED FROM EXISTENCE! THEY ARE A PAIR OF DEMONS THAT SHOULD BE SENT BACK TO THE HELL FROM WHENCE THEY CAME!""
Those idiots don't know when to give up! *Clink!* Huh?!
I tried to search for a decent hiding spot from Shouko but as I look down, I saw an incredible sight that she had managed to do this to me.
"T-that woman…she used a classic prison restraint?!
It was a chain lock to the floor tile of the classroom…WHAT THE HELL?! Is this even allowed in school? Not to mention the highest level of the class…and how does she managed to get a hold of this rare item?
I was about to think of the facts that's related to Shouko to be able to get a jail official leg cuff when a hand written receipt was left dangling infront of my face. It might be from Shouko that this might fell on top of me. I read the contents of the item in my hand
(XXXXXX) S&M merchandise
1 – Leg-to-Floor chain and cuff - Y4 000.00
Sold to: Yoshii Akihisa
"T-That moron…" I growled as I grit my teeth. For the sake of bargain and his own safety, he came up with a ridiculous way of obtaining such item without even a shame to hide his own identity. I crunched up the paper at hand. Stupid as it may be though, if Shouko who has a hand on these kinds of things, there's no telling that I can be assured that I'll be safe with it. For now it seems that these are just fake so they aren't as strong as what I would expect but…
"DAMN! THEY'RE STILL STRONG!"
I have to think fast about this though. Shouko is at the door trying to calm these crowds of idiots.
""PERSUE THE HERETICS! ANNIHILATE THEM FOR THE SAKE OF OUR PURITY! BURN THEM! RIP THEM TO SHREDS! AND FEED THEIR ASHES TO THE SUN WHERE THEY CAN NEVER RESPAWN AGAIN!""
Damn! They are more dangerous than the summoner test war itself.
"…My husband is not here."
…
""…""
"…"
I dunno what's worse now…This woman or…
""KILL SAKAMOTO YUUJI! BANISH THAT BASTARD! DO NOT LEFT ANY EVIDENCE OF HIS EXISTENCE! ANNNIHILATE THAT MORON!""
…These bunch of idiots that are after my life for some bold statement from a woman without even a confirmation to the other party…
Either way I have to break myself free to get myself out of this mess…I know I should be laughing at that idiot lying on the ground, but in this kind of situation. I WILL need him. I braced myself and prepared my wake up call. He is out cold but he can easily wake up by this.
"AKIHISA KICK!"
"OUCH! MY BALLS!"
I rolled in agony as a sudden shock of pain awake me from my unconscious state. I'm glad I was back in the living world but…
"WHY THE HELL YOU KI-!"
I growled at the ball kicker like I'm sort of a coach but he immediately covered my mouth with a hush voice. I stared in confusion of what it was until.
""ELIMINATE SAKAMOTO YUUJI! GET HIM! BURN HIM!""
Ahh!...so they are after him mostly now, and I see Kirishima-san trying her hardest to get rid of them…
"…Limited edition…school porn…"
""UWOOO! WHERE?! GO GET IT!""
NEGOTIATIONS ARE DONE IN AN INSTANT?!
"G-get me outta here you idiot!"
Yuuji panicked as he is still trapped in an oddly prison like shackles attached to his ankle. I wonder who is it from?
"Akihisa! If you don't save me, I can tell your sister what you have been doing in this school. And all the recent test scores."
Tch! That's blackmail! Don't they teach you in grade school not to black mail people?
Neither the less, he has quite a lot of weapons held against me. I can't be reckless in this kind of situation…damn…I'm in a tough bind…
I lowered myself to unshackle this jerk and hid ourselves close to the covered drink bar as possible. It would be best if we could manage to esc
ape from them. We kept our conversations to a minimal voice to avoid attract unnecessary attention from the pursuers.
"Akihisa…we need to get out of here. It's not safe!"
"What do you mean it's not safe? It's safe for me though."
"T-that… They will soon find out where we are. And for not we need to find that escape route, pronto."
As much as I would like to see Yuuji suffer more in this incident. He has a point, we can't let ourselves prolong in this place indefinitely 'cause they'll soon find us. I glanced around at anything we can use ourselves to hide into. Tch! There is no other option and seems.
"…Yuuji"
We are both startled by her sweet voice as we stood up immediately infront of Kirishima-san who has noticed our situation.
"O-oi Sh-Shouko! Did you get rid of them?" stammered Yuuji as he tries to get a grip of himself.
Kirishima-san nodded without hesitation and looks at me with seemingly helpful eyes and went past us towards a carpet.
"…over here." She called out as she pulled one corner of the carpet gently with her graceful hands revealing something that only us in the Class F are very familiar of.
""A trap door?!"" we cried in synchrony as we look on it more closely. I just can't believe it with my own eyes. Class 3-A possesses a trap door? And this was a class supposed to be focused more than just university but scholarship and research and such in their needs of knowledge so…how come these guys or even prior to them possesses something that only a very familiar low class in this school is capable of doing so?
Kirishima-san opened it and revealed a dark blank space and a sound of the wind, howling and breathing from the depths as if there was a living being which is hungry for even a single soul to venture in. My body reflexively taken aback from this feeling but something is grabbing me and as if trying to pull me in.
"Wait, Akihisa!" I was startled as Yuuji managed to pull me back into reality. Woo~~! For a second there I thought it'll be the end of me.
"There might be a trap inside." Yuuji then looked at Kirishima-san who shook her head but her cheeks were a bit red as if embarrassed to say there's something else inside it. We tried to reconsider this ominous offer when.
""WE HAVE INFO THAT THE IDIOT DUO ARE STILL HERE! SURRENDER THEM TO US OR BE PUNISHED WITH THEM!""
TCH! They just don't quit! I only looked at Yuuji who can only nod in reply as we both turned our sights back into that abyss.
"Even though it's a trap, It's better than those idiots…"
I nodded to his claim. And gave my own statement.
"After all, we're men! Such a threat can't beat us, right?"
Yuuji chuckled at those words and gave a sigh of reply "yeah…" and with 3 synchronized breathes, we leapt off the class floor and head down into the dark dungeon underneath class 3-A.
It was Pitch black in this room and we found ourselves being sealed from up above. That might be Kirishima-san trying to eliminate the evidence that we are here. As we heard rumbling of feet but soon fade away.
"Oi, Akihisa…it seems this room is made for escape routes…like the kings who try to abandon their castles."
"huh…but isn't this under the class 3-A? where would this go?"
"Im not sure, but hopefully isn't going to end well…"
Our conversation went on as our eyes slowly adapt to this dark room. We saw a lot of figures but describe them of what they actually were.
Suddenly, we saw a faint light over the distance, then slowly probing towards us, blinding us with our eyes that is now used in darkness.
"Ara? Aki?"
"Eh?" I uttered as I heard a familiar feminine yet tomboyish voice from the direction of light.
"Akihisa-kun?"
"Ah?!" I tried to identify the people behind the light as their voice became familiar to me: The girl wielding the light with her slender arm and standing on her also slender yet sturdy legs, her body is a whole new world to the definition of flat-chest that it is as flat as a Flat screen TV; her short and tomboyish red hair was tied with a small but familiar yellow ribbon and her emerald eyes seem to be staring at me with surprised…I'm also surprised to see her here.
Beside the girl is another familiar woman, who seem to have been clinging to her out of sheer fear of the darkness, her plump legs and admirable chest can send the eyes of every man drooling at such a sight yet her timid nature and intellectual knowledge underneath her cherry-blossom long hair resembles that of a rose of giving a seductive invitation inside for a good treasure. I feel relieved to see them but I feel that there's something more between us than what meets the eye. But for now I can only utter their respective names in amidst of confusion.
"M-Minami?! H-Himeji-san?!"
"A-Akihisa-kun!" She suddenly rushed towards me and clung herself onto me so suddenly that I cant feel my arms. Why am I relieved in this? Isn't this my first time?!
"So it really is Aki!" Minami muttered with a smile but sooner, a demonic grin in her face appeared as if she has caught her target.
Click!
"EH!?" I was confused from what that sound was until I realized that I cant move my hands behind my back even if Himeji-san lets go of me.
"AH!" I gasped in surprise as the whole room was brightened up not by the flashlight Minami was wielding but by a lightbulb that was present inside the room.
"W-What the hell is this?!" I cried out as what appeared to me is a room filled with chains, whips and many more items that I seem to be familiar in a certain shop I attended.
I suddenly realized that my partner has been quiet this whole time when the light from Minami's flashlight came and I gasped to see him bounded to a chair with his mouth gagged by a handkerchief.
"Yuuji!" I cried out but I remembered that I am in a bad situation as well.
"Akihisa – kun…" I felt a cold chill down my spine as I slowly faced the person who called me.
"Y-yes H-himeji-san?" I gulped my saliva that it seems I'm now faced with a beast and I am a warrior without even a single weapon at hand.
"Would you please be so kind to share us this?" as soon as she said it, Minami raised her hand with a player that played back a familiar scenario.
"Aki-kun…" "Aki-kun, it's time for you to wake up!" "Aki, if you don't wake up, *Beep* would do some naughty things to you."
"OKAY! OKAY! I'M UP! STOP IT, *Beep*! STOP! STOP! NOOOOOOOOOoooooo….!"
I try to escape this scene with one last question. "That erm…W-where did you get it?"
Then soon came a beauty with jet-black hair who, then, went beside the two prior women and answered.
"…a concerned citizen."
. . . and with that. . . Death has come before me without even trying to rebate this piece of evidence. The ladies wore a black cape around their bodies and cover their heads with a familiar hood with the mark of "F" as they slowly approached me and Yuuji.
"Ah! H-himeji-san! M-Minami! K-Kirishima-san! W-we can explain…No! NO! NOOOOOOOOOoooooo!"
And with that…my mind fade into blank darkness as I drifted off to a familiar river with a man of blazing red hair waiting for me.
We are joined together on one side of the river and stared at the other side of the river in silence as we just realized…The FFF is not the real threat when it comes to the punishment…for there is a much stronger force that waits before us…all I can say…is that I can call them the FFFF…the female and harsher version of the FFF inquisition…
"Yo, Mitsurini. Thou has a lot of income compared to thy usual one."
"…Special service."
"I see…Even those blueprints, recorder and that picture beside you?"
"…yes."
"Ah…I see, has thou seen the girls? PE is about to start soon and the teacher wants me to summon them."
"…no."
" I see….I might as well change into my PE uniform before I go find them. Alas, it's so hot today, and with all the fuss that happened, it really made me sweat under my uniform. What hast be thinking, Mitsurini?"
"… "
*FUWOOOOSH!*
"AHH! Not again!"