Continues from the last chapter.
Plus;
Lexa has her big day at the hospital.
Niylah comforts a distant Clarke.
People who reviewed on the last chapter, I've replied; you can find the comments after the chapter.
xx
Clarke's body started to fail her greatly. It starts with the panic that invaded her blue eyes, an unwanted emotion to be presented in front of someone that doesn't deserve anything from her. Then it was her tongue; helplessly flapping up and down with no avail in producing any words that could help explain what she meant. She soon grew tired of her body's deception; she shoved every emotion she was experiencing into the dark hole that loomed inside of her.
A gasp of air was forced out, as Clarke took charge of her tongue; forcing it to produce words. "I meant in general, I wasn't saying that I—" The blonde stopped, her eyes met green. It would be so easy to fall back into them, but Clarke wasn't fourteen anymore; those feelings had gone. At least that's what she was telling herself under the gaze of the brunette. Clarke could still see the darkness that harboured in those green orbs; she hasn't seen that haunting since Lexa confined in her about the death of her parents. So why has it come back? The blonde quickly got lost in her thoughts wondering if she still has that same look buried in her own eyes, after the four years that had passed since losing her dad. Does it ever go away?
"Clarke." Lexa pronounced the syllable effortlessly, yet the click of the 'K' stood with attention. "You don't have to explain anything to me."
The intern tightens her jaw, soaking in the truth of those words; she really didn't have to, so why was she trying so hard to explain. She nodded in understanding.
"I really should be getting back to work." she concluded; she was done talking with the brunette.
"Of course, it was good to see you again." Lexa said sincerely
Clarke only offered half a smile, before she turned to walk towards the stage; when a hand grabs hold of her wrist.
"Clarke." Lexa voice was suddenly rushed, she realised her spontaneous actions and released the young girl's wrist. "Costia—" she breathed, but nothing followed.
"What about Costia?" The blonde furrowed in confusion; seeing the alarm look in those green orbs
"She doesn't know."
The blonde was getting tired of the cryptic short sentences. "Doesn't know what Lexa?"
"About my parents." She blurted out.
"You haven't told her?" That explains why that darkness lingers in her eyes; she still hides from its contents.
"No. So I really need you to not tell her, or to bring it up." The plead in her voice, nearly made the blonde want to offer her comforting words, until an anger rose and fought for dominance.
"Who do you think you are?" Clarke spat.
"Excuse me?"
"Do you even have any remorse about the way you just left me? Because I don't think you do." The harshness continued in the intern's voice.
"What's that got to do—" Lexa began
"I'm not finished! Somewhere someone has some twisted sense of humour, by bringing you back into my life, and here you are demanding I keep a secret from Costia. Why are you so afraid to tell anyone the truth? Are you still pretending to be someone you're not Lexa?" Clarke questioned
"You don't know anything about me Clarke." Lexa spoke through gritted teeth.
Clarke searched into those green orbs, trying to find remnants of the Lexa she once knew.
"You're right, I don't know you." She sharply pronounced each word with a distaste tone
Lexa stoic look cracked slightly, her features softening into a hurtful manner, as the intonation of Clarke's voice felt like a reverberating weapon attacking the walls around her heart. Lexa struggles to understand why Clarke's words affected her so much, she forgets to respond.
"Don't worry Lexa, because unlike you I don't break my promises." The intern stormed off, disappearing behind stage.
"Shit." Lexa breathed out; running her hands over her face and into her hair. How did that go so badly?
Xx
Costia's plans to have drinks with Lexa and Clarke; never happened with both girls coming up with an excuse to not go.
Xx
Lexa's alarm went off at 5:00am; it had been three days since she last saw Clarke, or strategically avoiding her by not going to Costia's workplace. She quickly stopped the intruding noise echoing in the air; Lexa glanced at her girlfriend, who let out a disapproving groan.
"Go back to sleep" Lexa soothed; leaning over and kissing her forehead.
"Lex, promise me again you'll be there." Costia mumbled with her eyes closed; her voice was thick with sleep, as she buried her head deeper into the pillow.
Lexa wasn't expecting these words to leave her girlfriend's lips. She told her last night, she would be there; despite every fibre in her body wanting to spend the night anywhere else than with Nia Queen. The hurt that was building in her chest, quickly deflated when she realised Costia was sound asleep. She let out a huff, to get rid of the residue tension the words caused.
The brunette had to push that aside; she had an important day ahead of her. Today is the day she goes to Arkadia Memorial Hospital; it was a very big deal for her. Lexa thoughts switch back to Costia, as she stared sadly at her sleeping body. Resentment grew like wildfire across the brunette's body; Costia knew how important this day was to Lexa; how much she was looking forward to learning from the best. So why was it so hard for her girlfriend to wish her good luck? Instead she wastes her awaken breathe on making sure Lexa will be at the fashion show, when she already promised her last night. The green eyed beauty felt aloneness seep through into her skin; threatening to take over her mind. It was winning the assault, as tears threatened to spill from her eyes. The suction of her lips curled in, as her nostrils flared to help draw in oxygen helped as a defensive mechanism against the overwhelming feeling that was corrupting her mind. It was slowly working, as she repeated it over and over again; finally realising her lips from their capture.
She walked into the bathroom; splashing water over her face. There was no time to drown in self-pity now, Lexa needed to go to the hospital with a clear and strong mind. There was no room for weakness, so she pushed it all down to a place, she wishes to never visit.
Xx
When Lexa arrived at the hospital, she couldn't help the goose-bumps that erupted on her skin; it was like a calling, she knew in that moment this where her path would lead to. It was in her bones to become a doctor, she felt the warming feeling causing through her veins; making her eager to get this day started.
After signing in and going through the formalities of keeping her I.D card on her at all times, she joined the other candidates patiently waiting for the Chief Resident who was responsible for them being here today. The wait was cut to an end, as he shortly joined the group once all ten participants signed in.
"Hello, my name is Dr. Wells Jaha; I'm the Chief of Resident at Arkadia Memorial Hospital. Six months ago I had a meeting with the board members. They wanted my input on how we can improve young doctors to thrive in their chosen field. I proposed a plan to select ten candidates who are currently in the midst of doing their masters in medicine. My aim is that you will gain vast amount of knowledge in the three months you spend here; learning from your selected mentors, engaging in all the lecturers you attend. Ultimately I hope you will gain enough experience that will give you a head start in choosing the field you want to prosper in. This is a rare opportunity for you; you get to work with some of the most leading surgeons in America. And if you're smart you can even use some of our resources to help with your thesis project at the end of your masters."
There was excited chatter among the candidates, wondering who will be there mentors. Whilst the candidates continued speaking together, Lexa noticed nine doctors arrive; taking place behind . Lexa felt the butterflies in her stomach warp into a tornado; why were there only nine doctors, but ten candidates?
"I want you to know that you are my guinea pigs, you are a part of my experiment. You were specifically chosen by me and the surgeons you will be working with. Please do not let us down. When I call your name please introduce yourself to your assigned mentor. As I'm sure you would have heard of them, as they have made their mark in medicine, this is your chance to maybe do the same in the future." He nodded towards the nervy-looking candidates; maybe he went a bit extreme with his statement.
Dr. Jaha claps his hands together. "Right, let's get you partnered up, there's lots of work to do. When I call your name, please go stand next to your assigned Doctor."
Wells started to read the names; an each candidate bursts with glee, clearly happy with their assigned mentor. There was only two left; Lexa and a woman whose name tag read Becca, but there was only one doctor waiting to be partnered up. The green eyed brunette recognised him, as a brain surgeon.
"Becca Summers you are with Dr. Lu." Wells concludes.
She beamed with joy, before giving Lexa a sympathetic look. Lexa noticed the smug look of her peers, as they stood next to their partners for this experiment. The brunette features remained stoic, her jaw tightening. She was struggling to keep composure; she knew this opportunity was too good to be true. Lexa felt deflated.
"Don't worry Lexa Woods, I haven't forgotten about you. In fact we were all very eager to meet you." said with a fondness in his voice. A confused looking Lexa observed her surroundings, the participating doctors where staring at her, with a bright smile; nodding at what Wells said. She got some satisfactory feeling after seeing the candidates furrow in her direction, the seethe of jealous that was slipping through their pours. The smug smiles completely wiped from their faces.
"I don't understand." The brunette croaked.
"Well you've shown great potential, currently top of your class at Harvard. Your recent invitation to Alaska by Dr. Indra Marshall to aid in her recent research project; she only had good things to say about you, and she's not an easy one to please. You appear to be very special."
Lexa stared at him blankly, still not understanding what's going on. Wells pushed on.
"Arkadia Memorial has been trying for years to get a very special guest to work here, but every time an offer was made, the doctor in mind graciously declined. That was until recently, when she saw your name listed on this experiment. After some negotiating, she has agreed to stay at the hospital for the duration of this experiment, and we are all very excited to have her here. But you Lexa, you get the honour to be partnered up with her."
"Who is it?" She asked nervously.
xx
While Lexa had succeeded in avoiding Clarke, she was surprised that she didn't think about the other Griffin lady that was a part of her life once upon a time. The brunette remained frozen in the doorway, as she stared at Abby in her scrubs.
"Lexa Woods. It's nice to see you again." The older woman said sincerely; pulling of her personal surgical cap and placing it on the table. "I'm sorry I wasn't able to meet you, I got called into surgery."
The green eyed brunette was trying to communicate her brain to her mouth, but the younger woman was clearly experiencing a short circuit somewhere along the channel. When she tried to produce words, only air filtered out.
Abby and Wells laughed at Lexa's state.
"I think she's a little bit star-struck. I'll leave you ladies to it." smiled before leaving.
"I know it must come as a surprise to you, but I had a feeling about you the first time we met. I hope you don't mind but I've actually been in regular contact with your professors at Harvard. The feedback they gave me, I knew that when I heard about Dr. Jaha's plan to select candidates for this experiment; I wanted to be partnered up with you"
"Why?" Lexa vocalised, finally able to find at least one syllable to leave her mouth.
Dr. Griffin studied Lexa before she answered; guilt was the common denominator. "Lexa, is this about Clarke?" The visible tightness in the brunette's jaw and physical tension that appeared on her throat, Abby got her answer.
"I don't blame you, Lexa. I was actually mad at myself, because I could see that she was—" Abby finished with a forced breathe, not really feeling comfortable with this conversation. She shook her head, sucking in her lips; trying to change the direction of the sentence. "You were a good friend to her, and you brought the best out of her. There was nothing anyone could have done; she was in a vulnerable place, and you made her feel better. It's within reason that she developed a connection with you, it's natural."
Lexa didn't meet Abby's eye contact. There's no way Abby would say this, if she knew what happened the last night she was in Polis. The young woman's silence prompted the older Griffin to conclude her statement.
"Please don't let the past interfere with this opportunity. I know you'll have the potential to become an amazing doctor and this experiment Dr. Jaha has come up with, can help you greatly. "
"Let's get to work." Lexa smiled warmly at Abby, but it doesn't quite reach her cheeks. She was still struggling to let the light of Abby's words break through the darkness that haunted her inside. The brunette knew she might only find solace in talking to Clarke, but she wasn't going to be selfish and drag it all up, when Clarke only wanted to forget it ever happened.
Xx
Clarke was completing the never-ending check list Nia gave her this morning before the show, when she felt arms wrap at her waist. She jerked away, anger quickly boiling to the surface.
"What the h-?" The last word felt flat, and mingled into her breathe when she saw the wide alarmed eyes looking at her
"I'm sorry; I didn't mean to scare you." Niylah spoke regretfully
"Don't be. I should apologise I overreacted." Clarke half smiled; before making her way around the blonde to check the dresses were labelled correctly.
"Is everything okay?" The model followed her movement
"Yeah, why wouldn't it be?" The blonde didn't look back at her; instead she flicked through the rail of clothing.
"You haven't seemed yourself for the past few days, and Costia thinks you're avoiding her."
The last statement got Clarke's attention.
"Why would she think that? I've just been really busy, and I'm running on three hours sleep with a lot of caffeine. It's a big deal for me to be at fashion show week, working for Nia Queen. I just want to make a good impression." The intern defended; despite knowing some of what Niylah said was true.
Niylah grabbed Clarke's hands and guided her to sit down on the sofa.
"Listen to me, Nia loves you; you don't have anything to prove. Just being who you are is more than enough; you're so talented, hard-working, smart and kind-hearted. I would say you've made more than an impression; you don't need to work yourself into the ground to get noticed. You're already shining Clarke Griffin."
Clarke is taken back by Niylah's words, she just stares into hazel eyes seeing sincerity radiating of them. She instinctively leans forward, grabbing the older woman's face; their lips connect for a few seconds, getting lost in the gentle kisses.
"What was that for?" The model's eyes were still close; her lips still feeling the effect of the kisses.
"For being you." The intern smiled earnestly at the blonde.
"You're welcome." Niylah responds shyly, before perking up. "You're going to the after-party tonight, right?"
"It's the only thing getting me through this day." The exhaustion was clear in Clarke's voice.
"Do you need a ride? I can pick you up."
"No." Clarke shot down; Niylah's hopeful face collapsed. "You'll be in no state to drive after; we can get an uber together, you can leave your car at my house."
"Well looks like I'll just have to go home with you at the end of night." Niylah smirked; trying to regain some control in the younger girl's presence.
"You sure you won't find someone else by that time." The dimples in the intern's face were becoming dominant, as she tried to fight the grin that was tugging at her lips.
"I know what I want." Niylah said strongly.
"You're going to have to show me just how much you want it." Clarke smirked.
"I plan to." Niylah spoke; her voice smothered in seduction, as she stepped into Clarke's personal space. She was determined to give the blue eyed blonde a taste of her own medicine, as she leaned down to take her lips, when a vibration broke the atmosphere between the two women. "Is that your phone or are you just really turned on. I'm hoping for the latter." Niylah scoffed; leaning against Clarke's forward before stepping away.
Clarke groaned before she searched for the badly timing device. She looked at the reminder that was lighting up her front screen. "Shit! I forgot about lunch with my mom. I can't cancel again, but Nia will lose it, if I leave now."
"Don't worry, I'll cover for you." The model offered.
"Thank you!" Clarke engulfed the model into a hug. As the intern pulled away she placed a kiss to the corner of Niylah's lips. "I'll only be an hour tops."
"I really need to get going. Please don't let Ontari anywhere near the dresses, shoes or just keep her away from everything." The blondes gestured with her hands, before looking around at nothing in particular. "I have a horrible feeling about tonight and I don't know why, but if anything was to go wrong, Ontari is my top suspect."
The model laughed how worked up she was getting. "I'm not due for make-up for another two hours, so I will look after things here. Now go woman!"
Clarke smirked, as she took a step closer to Niylah, wrapping arms around her slender waist.
"Have I ever told you, how hot you look when you try to act bossy?" Clarke breathed against her mouth, before gently pulling her bottom lip into her mouth, applying enough pressure to not cause pain, but to leave a tingly feeling pulsing at the assaulted area.
The model's limps suddenly felt like jelly; her breathing was a little ragged. If there was one thing she knew for definite, it was that Clarke Griffin drives her crazy.
"I'll see you in a few" Clarke spoke softly, before leaving a stunned blonde in her wake.
Niylah was to speechless to reply; she just ran her fingers ghostly over the area where Clarke bit her, and laughed whole-heartedly at the disappearing intern. Touché.
xx
Clarke made her way into the hospital; she had made plans to have lunch every other day with her mother, since she temporarily moved to New York for the summer. The blonde graciously rushed up the stairs towards her mom's office, her belly was gurgling with hunger. She actually can't remember the last time she ate.
Without thinking she just opened the door that was gold-plated with Dr. Abigail Griffin's name.
"Clarke!" Lexa said in a higher pitch tone. She pushed her hands against the table; quickly shooting out of the swivelling chair. She stood awkwardly; shifting her weight from her toes to her heels, and then vice versa.
"Lexa?" The blonde voice was low, as if her mind was occupied with heavy thoughts. "What are you doing in my mom's office?"
"I'm working here for the summer; a new programme that the hospital is experimenting on, I'm one of the candidates taking part. I was surprised when I learnt I was partnered up with . Small world, huh?" The brunette said in an unusual thick tone laced with nervousness.
Clarke tightens her lips, nodding in agreement. "Do you know where she is?"
"She was paged for a consult, she should be back soon." Lexa tried assuming her professional voice but it was lacking a firmness that's usually present when she speaks.
"Okay." Clarke looked at anything but Lexa. The air was already becoming insufferable. She could see the brunette was struggling too, as she resumed to fidgeting behind the desk. Through the corner of her blue eye she saw Lexa move; now standing in front of the desk. It was like she wanted to speak, but was losing the momentum to do so.
The blonde couldn't take one more second of this torturing atmosphere.
"It's a big deal then."
A light grew in Lexa's green eyes, when she heard the younger's girl's voice. Something that Clarke noticed.
"The um—experiment your apart off, there are doctors out there that would do anything to work with my mom. Don't take it for granted" Was all Clarke offered.
Lexa smiled at the effort the blonde put into making conversation.
"I would never take it for granted, I still feel like I'm dreaming. I've already learned so much from her. She's phenomenal." A brightness consumed Lexa's green eyes as she spoke.
A small twitch of smile grew on Clarke's face; she noticed the passion was still present in the older girl's eyes from the last time she saw it. The smile quickly disappeared, when the brunette made eye contact.
The blonde nodded in agreement; her mother was an amazing surgeon, but it did come at a price. Clarke shook away the corrupting past memories, as her mother had been making more of an effort with her since the death of her father.
"Clarke about the other night, I'm sorry I shouldn't have asked you—" Lexa paused not able to finish the sentence. "I just never found the courage to tell her." Lexa head slumped lowly.
"No you shouldn't have, but I'm sorry too. I shouldn't have judged you, I know how hard it can be opening up." Clarke offered a tight smile.
Lexa's eyes met blue. While they were on the subject of apologies, there was a big one; she needed to say to the blonde
"Clarke I'm so sorry for the way-"
"I don't want to talk about it!" Her sharp tone cutting through Lexa words before she was able to finish her sentence. The intern knew where that apology was going; she wasn't ready to deal with that.
"We have to at some point, otherwise-" Lexa was cut off for the second time; while it frustrated the brunette, she just let the blonde speak.
"We're both adults Lexa, I'm sure we can be civil for Costia sake, she's a good friend of mine; I don't want her to think things are uncomfortable." Clarke injected; she knew Lexa presence was already affecting her friendship with Costia; she had been avoiding her, not knowing how to act. But not anymore, she wasn't going to lose her over this.
"Maybe at some point, we can be more than just civil. Maybe we can actually be friends again." Once the snake hiss syllable left her lips, Lexa wishes she could vacuum the words that lingered in the air, because the look on Clarke's face was daunting.
"Friends." She hissed with venom, before giving Lexa backlash when she spoke in a softer tone. "Don't get me wrong Lexa; it's good to see you again. Because it means that I can finally get closure when I say that you were right."
Lexa furrowed in confusion, Clarke recognised the look quickly, so she took a step closer to the brunette before speaking.
"That I don't need you, and quite frankly I'm not ready to be your friend." The blonde voice remained stoic
Lexa lips parted, her eyes dart away from Clarkes blue. She nods her head, letting the blonde know she heard her clearly.
The silence was thankfully filled when someone entered the room.
"Lexa were you able to find—" Abby paused mid-sentence when she saw Clarke; she darted her eyes to the brunette, immediately sensing the toxic air, but it was her daughter who broke the tension.
"Have to reign-check on our lunch, i'm not feeling hungry anymore." And with that statement she walked up to her mom placing a quick kiss on her cheek before leaving.
"Clarke knows how to hold a grudge. She can be her own worst enemy at times, she'll come around." Abby tries to comfort Lexa.
The brunette clears her throat, putting her professional voice on "I found the folder you were looking for. Hope you don't mind, but I think I'll take my break now." She doesn't show any recognition she heard her, but the older woman knows she did.
Abby sighed heavily. They're both equally stubborn.
xx
Thank you readers; for your amazing support of my story. Huge thank you to those who write the reviews. It's greatly appreciated.
Let me know what you think.
Or what you would like to see happen at the fashion show or after party.
Hope you enjoyed.
My reply to comments
SkyeMarie90: Thank you so much for you generous review. Truly means a lot, I'm glad you're enjoying the story. I hope you enjoyed the chapter.
Guest; Boom! Thanks for the review Guest. Hope you enjoy the new chapter.
We all fall here: Glad you enjoyed it. Thanks so much for reviewing; really helps to keep writing to know people enjoy reading my story. Well after that chapter does that answer your question? If not yes they are a thing; they are exactly that. No labels will be defined between them. The thing with Clarke is that she just got a hell of a shock, she won't be hung up per say, but Lexa did hurt her, so she tries to deal with that whilst being in her presence. But it will be Lexa to go out of her way for Clarke, not the other way round. So we will see a jealous Lexa in future chapters.
AJM233: I like you're thinking, but sadly yes that would have caused quite a mess that I wouldn't be able to fix. But doesn't mean you're not onto something there. Hopefully you'll keep reading to find out what I mean
Guest: I've update! Sorry for the wait. I hope it was worth it.
Fanfic Junkie26: So glad you reviewed! Really means a lot to me. Thank you I appreciate that, and I would never give up. I will finish this story. Hope you enjoyed the new chapter.
Lovesy12: Thank you for your continuous support. I really appreciate it.