Jasper

After a while, the rain let up. I had been leaning on the hand rail on the balcony outside the back door, staring into the darkness between the pine trees and listening to the rainfall. That moment a few hours before kept playing in my head. The more I recalled it, the harder I stared. Why had I said it? Why couldn't I have just thought it? Even then, it was still horrible. At least it wouldn't have meant Tania taking off.

I'd really messed up.

I grabbed my phone from the back pocket of my jeans and opened her message thread. The last two messages sent were simply me telling her I loved her and Tania replying that she loved me too. My thumb hovered over the call icon, but I changed my mind, sliding the phone away with a heavy sigh.

The back door opened. I didn't look up, though there were light steps. Alice hopped over the rail and sat balanced on it a couple of feet from me.

"Esme and Carlisle have gone to get her," she exclaimed.

I ran a hand through my hair, cold droplets of water falling onto my shirt and running down the back of my neck. "I'm such an idiot."

"Jasper, you're not."

I shook my head. "Yeah, I am. You know what I said."

Alice shrugged. "Yup. Still doesn't make you an idiot. Trust me, she's not going to dump you because of one stupid comment. And you're being a bit over dramatic right now."

Scoffing, I glanced at her.

"Come on, Jas," she continued. "They'll be back soon. You should probably quit feeling sorry for yourself and get changed."

"I don't think I should be here when she gets back, Alice. She needs space-,"

Suddenly, she slapped my arm. Not hard, but not soft either. I looked up at her with raised eyebrows, touching my arm where she'd hit me.

"What she needs," Alice frowned, "is for you to be there for her." She paused. "And to let me sort out her hair, except that can wait. This can't."

I turned away, leaning back on the hand rail. Alice was right, but I had already been trying. "I don't know how." I admitted, "I don't know how to make her happy."

Alice watched me, listening. I could feel her anguish, too.

"She's so unhappy," I said, "all the time. Even when she's not, it's still there. I'm scared Tania's spiralling and there's nothing I can do. There are some feelings my power can't fix-,"

She cut me off, "You don't have to fix her, Jas." Alice hopped back over, landing elegantly on her feet. "She's not an object that's broken. Just talk to her."

I sighed again. "I thought that coming back here would mean a new start for us both. Getting some more distance from her mother, finally settling down in one place for a while, seeing everyone again…" I trailed off. "I feel like I've made things worse."

Alice shook her head. "You guys have been back for all of three days? Of course she's not going to be ecstatic all at once. Tania hadn't even been on a plane before coming here. Have a bit more patience, Jasper. You and Tania will be so happy, one day. I don't need to know the future for that."

Finally, taking in Alice's words, I nodded.

She strode over to the back door and turned back. "And change into some dry clothes. Please."

"Thank you," I said. I meant it.

"You're welcome," she rolled her eyes at me before closing the door behind her.

Less than fifteen minutes later, I heard a car engine outside. Tania's emotions began edging their way into my scope. There was aching and dread, but also a sense of relief and hope. Unlike others, her feelings had a wider range. Since we re-joined the coven I'd noticed I could feel her emotions from further away, and I knew they were hers. It was as if there was a long piece of string that managed to find its way between everybody else. A strong connection, that seemed to lengthen the string over time, too.

I made my way down the stairs, listening to the car doors slamming and Esme's kind words.

"Maybe tomorrow will be better." I heard her say. "Remember what we talked about, ok, sweetheart?"

"Thank you," Tania replied.

"No more suffering in silence, please, Tania?" said Carlisle.

I met them on the ground floor and her dread only increased once she'd caught sight of my face by the stairs.

"Tania." I stood by the staircase, unsure whether to approach or not. Had I been right? Did she want to see me?

Her hand tightened on the strap of her backpack. Carlisle and Esme were behind her, but I kept my eyes on her face. Her hair laid flat, wet from the rain. She said nothing.

"Can we talk?" I asked, taking a step forward.

She nodded once and walked towards me. I moved aside so she could take the stairs in front of me. Neither of us spoke on the journey up to the top floor, and I could feel her getting nervous. I really didn't want her to be, however I restrained myself from changing the air. It was safer that way and I didn't want to complicate things any more.

In our room, she dropped her bag onto the floor and started taking off her coat. I closed the door behind me, watching her, unsure how to start.

While she hung up her coat I stood behind her. She turned around, slowly.

"Tania." I took both her hands in mine. She avoided eye contact with me, as she so often did when she felt like that. "Please, look at me."

With a crease deepening on her forehead, she did so. Her big eyes glinted in the light and I automatically checked below them for the purple bruising. That time, they were faint since she'd only hunted just over a day ago. I hadn't meant to. It was a habit that had become routine.

"I am deeply sorry about what I said. It was inexcusable."

She didn't say anything, so I continued.

"It's been more difficult than I've let on and I didn't want to cause you any more pain by saying so. Feeling like this, is hard."

She frowned.

"I've been searching for an easy way out, with my gift, which clearly isn't going to work. I want to be more patient. I want to be there for you."

Tania pulled her hands away, wounding me. "I already forgave you," she sighed, stepping over to the bed. She sat down on the edge, unzipping her boots and then kicking them off. "I'm not angry at you, Jas."

I took a seat next to her, watching her carefully. "Then what's wrong?"

"I – just -," Tania broke off, glaring at the floor, pulling her sleeves down so they were coving some of her hands.

After a moment she looked at me. "I've been asking myself that question all the time. Why can't I be happy?" She pulled her leg up so she could face me properly. "I have a huge family that care about me, everything I could ever ask for, the love of my life," she listed. "And I'm still not happy. Being a blood sucking demon wouldn't bother me so much if I didn't know my mother is five thousand and something miles away crying herself to sleep. It's been two years and I'm still not over it. And school's shit. But apart from that, everything's fine." She put her face in her hands.

"Oh, darlin'," I breathed, wrapping my arms around her. "It's gunna be ok. We've all been through this. I can't promise you'll be happy, but I can promise I'll do my best to help you. And not by manipulating your emotions. Whenever you need me, I'm here."

"Thank you," she whispered.

I smiled, breathing in the smell of coconut from her hair. "You don't need to thank me. It's my job."

I adjusted my position on the bed and pulled her close to me so we were lying on top of the covers with Tania snuggled up to my side. I held her tightly. We lay on the bed for a while longer. I could feel her gratitude and relief. Her pain had lessened and she felt better. How long that would stick, I wasn't sure.

Upon a knock on the door, we both sat up.

"Yes?" I asked.

The door opened. Rosalie and Alice entered.

"We're here for Tania's hair." Alice grinned.

For a few minutes I stood in the doorway of Alice and Rosalie's "Beauty Studio" as they called it, which was just a room full of make-up, jewellery, dressing tables and mirrors.

I watched as Rosalie started softly running a brush through Tania's damp, shoulder length hair. I smiled as she relaxed in her seat. Her stormy waves were still and calm as they washed over me.

From downstairs I could hear a familiar melody coming from the piano. At last, everything was peaceful. I stood for a minute, my eyes closed as I felt Tania's emotions.

And then I decided to leave the girls to whatever they had to do. Wherever I was in the house, I could feel my mate's emotions.

Downstairs, Carlisle and Esme were sitting together on the sofa watching TV. As I walked through the archway, they both looked up at me.

I nodded to them, "I wanted to thank you both."

"You're very welcome, Jasper," Carlisle replied.

I took a seat on one of the armchairs.

Esme smiled brightly. "We all want the same thing. For everyone to be happy."

I returned the smile to her, "It might be a long road."

"We're all in the same car," said Carlisle.

My smile widened, "But which side of the road?"

He chuckled and Esme laughed. I couldn't help but laugh with them.

The three of us watched TV for about an hour. Wales swam through the ocean in a nature documentary series that Esme had wanted to see. It didn't quite hold my attention as much as Tania's pleasant comfort while the wales drifted along in the dark water.

My eyes flickered to some movement through the archway by the stairs as Alice skipped down the steps. Tania followed with Rosalie behind her.

The three of them appeared at the archway and Alice beamed at all of us expectantly, presenting Tania. "Well?" Alice clapped her hands together, swinging on her feet.

Tania stood between my two sisters, shyly fiddling with her sleeves, a small smile on her lips. Her hair that had been battered by the wind and the rain had been dried and carefully curled, framing her face perfectly.

"You look lovely," Esme commented.

Carlisle nodded in agreement.

"You'll have all the boys at school going crazy, tomorrow." Rosalie exclaimed, adjusting one of the curls.

Alice giggled. "As if she doesn't already, Rose."

Tania caught my eyes and crossed the room to sit on the arm of the chair.

"You look beautiful," I told her, "as always."

She smiled, but her brow furrowed slightly. "All that work for 'as always'?" she questioned.

Rosalie laughed.

I pulled Tania down so she was sitting on my lap, wrapping my arm around her waist. "You know what I meant," I growled. And then added more seriously, "now, you look exceptionally beautiful."

"That's better." Alice grinned.

Tania slid her arm around my shoulders, touching the ends of my hair.

"Ugh!" she took her arm back, wiping her hand on her pants. My hair was still wet from the rain. "I think we need to do your hair."

Alice's eyes widened. "Challenge accepted," she chimed.

"Wait, no-,"

Tania stood up, taking one of my hands in both of hers, dragging me to my feet. Alice pranced over, grabbing my other arm.

"I can do it myself-," I started, but she cut me off.

"Clearly, you can't."

"Have fun," Esme laughed, turning back to the documentary as I was being dragged up the stairs.

Not as long as my previous chapter, but I only wanted to write one point of view for each chapter and the next one will involve day 2 of Forks High which wouldn't be nearly as interesting as writing it in Tania's view. Hope you all enjoyed this chapter & reviews really influence my motivation to continue. Even if you just wanted to say two words :)