Vanessa had been shocked when, after waking up in the back of a car, to see Amy bound and gagged like she was. Amy had looked over at her with such a sad expression and she tried to say something to her, but the gag made it impossible to understand. The British man yelling over her saying to "Shut up, sweetheart," probably didn't help matters.

Vanessa had glared at the man, who was sitting comfortably up front in the passenger seat. Next to him was the woman who had knocked her out, which made Vanessa wince in remembered pain. Whoever that woman was, she packed a punch.

The car pulled to a stop, and Vanessa found herself yanked out of the car by the female, while Amy was also yanked out by the British guy. She looked over at Amy, wanting to know if she was struggling, only to wince when she saw the dejected slump in the red-head. It was hard to see someone like Amy, who had always been full of energy and happiness – full of life, really – allow someone to drag her around like the way the British ass was doing.

It made her want to struggle, and she almost did, but then Amy looked over at her with pleading eyes and shook her head, as if she somehow knew what Vanessa was planning. Vanessa nodded, showing she understood, though she didn't agree.

The two women were dragged onto some sort of platform, and then unceremoniously tied in place via painful, skin-digging zip ties. Once that was done, the gags were removed from their mouths.

"Thanks, dickless. And I mean you," Vanessa spat at the British man.

The man rolled his eyes. "Well. You're a talker too? You and Wade." He paused and then chuckled. "Or is it Amy and Wade? My ex-wife never did have great taste in men, myself included."

Vanessa looked over at Amy in time to see the red-head frowning at the British man. "Wade is a good man, Francis," she snapped. "He has stayed loyal to Vanessa the entire time, which can't be said for you."

The British man, Francis, just laughed. "Wade's like a cockroach – and just as ugly as one too. Now, I may not feel, but he does. Let's see how he fights with both of your heads on the block."

He turned and walked away, leaving Vanessa and Amy by themselves.

"Vanessa I'm so sorry," Amy said after a small pause. "This never would have happened if I pushed Wade harder. He refused to tell you and I didn't want to go behind his back."

"It's fine," Vanessa said after a pause of her own. "Were you telling the truth about him staying loyal?"

Amy nodded. "Wade loves you, Vanessa. Just like…" she swallowed hard and then looked down at her lap. "Just like I love him," she admitted.

She didn't know what she expected as a reply – anger, telling her back off, something unkind about how Wade would never love someone like her. What she didn't expect was Vanessa to start laughing and then crow in obvious glee, "I knew it!"

Amy looked over at her, frowning in confusion. "You did?" she asked.

Vanessa nodded vigorously. "You always give Wade this special smile," she pointed out. She seemed to calm down some as she relaxed against the pole they were tied to. "I loved Wade when I was with him, and I loved my time with him. But we were never truly going to last. He and I are too similar and…" Vanessa shook her head, though she was still smiling. "Amy, when he was sick you brought him more joy than I ever did. I think he loves you Amy, and I think that is amazing."

If they hadn't been tied up, Amy had the feeling that Vanessa would have taken her hand. "Amy, I will gladly step aside from Wade for you."

Amy felt tears well up in her eyes. "You really don't have to –" she tried to protest, though even she could hear how weak her voice sounded, and judging by Vanessa's raised eyebrow and smirk, so could she. "Wade and I haven't started anything."

"I know, you've told me as much. But I'm still going to do it," Vanessa stated. She sighed and shook her head. "When Wade left me it proved a lot of thoughts I had. Our relationship was not sustainable. To impulsive people together?" Vanessa shook her head. "I need someone who will stop me from doing something stupid, not egg me on by joining me."

Amy nodded. "Will my protesting do nothing to stop you?" she asked.

Vanessa laughed. "I'm free to make my own choices, and my choice is to stop dating Wade Wilson."

The topic officially plated, Vanessa frowned over at Francis, who was speaking intently to a large group of men. "How do you him?"

Amy sighed. "Francis and I met when I was waitressing a food joint. We ended up exchanging numbers and started dating. That turned to marriage and, for three years, we were happy. He worked on the police force after his time in the military and I was able to continue working as a waitress, but then my job closed down. He promised to support me, and he did, until he got diagnosed with cancer."

Amy shook her head, hearing Vanessa make a sympathetic noise. "He ended up losing his job as well. We were loosing money until he started working at Sister Magaret's. A month later the same night he told me he would always love me, he left a note for me to find that informed me he was running off with a woman named Angel would had promised his salvation. I never saw him again."

Amy huffed. "If I had known that Francis was that Francis, the one that hurt Wade so badly, I would have warned him. Perhaps this all could have been avoided."

Vanessa frowned. "What did they do to Wade?"

Amy sighed. "I…that's Wade story to tell, Vanessa. I'm sorry but I don't want to overstep any boundaries."

Vanessa's frown just deepened. "Is he alright?" she asked.

Amy quickly nodded. "He's fine – though I doubt he'll be pleased when he finds out that Francis has us."

Amy was right, Wade was not pleased. He was so not pleased that he decided to make a deal with the metal-ass devil, which led to Wade running up to the x-man mansion. He had a couple of guys who were already heading to where Francis and Amy and Vanessa were to scope out the firepower, but he knew that to fight people Francis and Angel he needed backup. Super backup.

He raised his fist to knock on the ornate door, but it was opened instead by the girl, Negasonic. "Ripley! From Alien 3!" Wade greeted with a mock grin – a grin that she couldn't see because he was wearing his suit.

Negasonic raised an eyebrow. "Fuck, you're old," she said with laugh.

"Ha! Fake laugh, hiding real pain. Go get silver balls," Wade said.

Negasonic crossed her arms. "You guys going for a bite? Early bird special?"

"Oh, like there's something wrong with eating before sundown or saving money. No, you know that bad guy that you let go? He's got my girls. You're gonna help me get them back."

He felt, and heard, Colossus come stomping – likely his normal walking – towards them. "Wade, is that you?" he asked.

Wade sighed. He liked it when people called him by his name, but only on his terms. Amy would be the only exception to that rule, she had told him very firmly that she would always call him Wade, no matter what, and then she had asked whether or not that was okay with him. Colossus was not an exception.

"It's me, Deadpool, and I got an offer that you can't refuse!" Wade called over to the man, as he wasn't insight. "I'm gonna wait out here, okay? Big house. It's funny that we only ever see two of you. It's almost like the studio couldn't afford another x-man."

Negasonic frowned at him and then shook her head, turning away and closing the door with a muttered, "You're so weird."

Wade ended up calling a taxi and was pleasantly surprised when the driver turned out to be Dopinder, the man who drove him before. Wade sat in the passenger seat and Colossus and Negasonic sat in the back.

Wade checked his phone and frowned. The men hadn't responded in over an hour and he had a bad feeling that that meant they were dead. By Francis, the fucker.

Shaking his head, Wade launched into his theory about the movie cocoon, finishing triumphantly, "And that is why, in my opinion, the movie cocoon is pure pornography."

Dopinder blinked. He seemed to have no response to what Wade had said, which most didn't. Finally, it seemed he decided to just change the subject. "Who brought this twinkly man?" He asked, referencing Colossus, who was sipping loudly on a drink.

"Twinkly, but deadly," Wade corrected. "My chrome-penised friend back there has agreed to do me this solid. In exchange, I told him I would consider joining his boy band."

"It's not boy band," Colossus corrected.

Wade waved his hand in Colossus' general direction. "Sure it's not. Ah! So, any luck winning Gita back?"

Dopinder sighed and shook his head. "I tried to Mr. Pool, but Bantu is more craftier and handsomer than me," he admitted.

"Well, I think you're pretty darn cute," Wade said with a smile – once again they couldn't see it but it's the thought that counts, right?

The cab went over a pothole roughly with a bump. The cab went over a pothole oddly loud as well, because a sharp scream was heard from the trunk, making everyone, even Wade, but especially Colossus, tense and look over at the suddenly very intently driving Dopinder.

"Dopinder," Wade said.

"Hmm?" Dopinder responded, sounding very, very nervous.

"What was that?" Wade asked.

Dopinder sighed. "Uh, that was, uh...Bantu, in the trunk."

"Ban-who?" Colossus asked worriedly from the back of the cab. Even Negasonic looked up with slight interest from her phone.

"My romantic rival, Bantu. He's tied up in the trunk. I'm doing like you said, DP. I'm going to gut him like a tenduri fish, then put his carcass on Gita's doorstep," Dopinder explained with a proud look to Wade.

Wade had no idea what to say. He was honestly very touched though. Someone had found his advice useful, had thought that he was wise enough to be listened to. Was this what elders in tribe felt like?

Still, he could feel Colossus' eyes on him, and he knew that he had to at least appear to say something superhero-ey. "I did not tell him to do that! Absolutely not! It got lost in translation! Dopinder, this is no way to win Gita's heart back!" Dopinder looked over at him in shock, just in time for Wade to hiss, "I'm so proud of you."

Dopinder blinked and looked between the road and Wade in confusions. "Drop Bantu off, safe and gentle like," he ordered. "Kill him," he instructed, as an elder should. "And then win Gita back! The old fashioned way, with your boyish charm," he finished. "Kidnap her," he hissed.

From the back of the cab, Negasonic shook her head. "He's super dead," she stated.

They suddenly pulled to a stop. "Oh!" Dopinder cried out, sounding just as shocked they had arrived as his passengers. He turned to Wade and then sighed. "I presume a crisp high five?"

"For you? Ten!" Wade cheered, holding up both hands. For some reason, Dopinder seemed less than enthusiastic to give Wade the high fives.

But that was okay, because Wade had enough enthusiasm for all of them. He turned to Negasonic and Colossus and clapped his hands together. "Okay, the team I sent ahead is likely dead, so let's go out there, avenge their lives, and make a difference!" He turned to Dopinder one last time and hissed, "You know what to do."

The two gave each other thumbs up, and then Wade closed the door and watched as he drove away.

He turned towards where he knew Francis, Amy, and Vanessa were. "Time to make the chimi fucking changas. Not often a dude ruins your face, wall stomps your sanity, grabs your future baby-momma and your old future baby-momma, and personally sees to four of your five shittiest moments. Let's just say, it's beginning to look a lot like Christmas."

The trio started to approach the large platform, looking awesome as fuck. He knew that 'X Gon' Give It to Ya' was playing as they walked – as it should, that was a boss ass song.

And then Negasonic had to go and ruin it for him by asking, "Hey, where's your duffel bag?"

Wade turned around, and then cursed. Grabbing his phone, he called Dopinder. After multiple rings, the voice mail came over, cheerfully saying, "Leave a message, and have a happy day!"

Groaning, he hung up his phone and put it away. "God damn it!" He cursed. "I'm gonna do this the old fashioned way. With two swords and maximum effort. Cue the music."

The started to walk once more, Wade wincing as they passed by bodies, familiar bodies. There went his head team. As they got closer, a bunch of men with guns came out on the ground. On the top of the platform, Francis came out as well. "Wade Wilson! What's my name?"

Wade looked up at him, and smirked. "Ooh, I'mma fucking spell it out for you."

Smirking back at him, as if he could see through the mask, Francis ordered to Angel, who appeared next to him, "Go get some."

Wade started to back up, tapping Negasonic and Colossus on the arms with excitement. "Superhero landing, she's gonna do a superhero landing, wait for it!"

Just like he predicted, Angel did a superhero landing, jumping off the platform and landing surprisingly well.

Wade started to clap. "Woo! Superhero landing. You know, that's really hard on your knees. Totally impractical. They all do it. You're a lovely lady, but I'm saving myself for Francis. That's why I brought him."

Rolling her eyes, Angel headed straight for Colossus, pegging him as the man who would cause her the most problems. Of course, Colossus was not for this plan, and held up his hands while taking several steps back. "I'd prefer not to hit a woman, so please, pla –"

His voice cut off as he was sent forcibly back by a punch from Angel, sprawling several feet on the ground.

Wade blinked and motioned to Negasonic. "I mean...That's why I brought her?" He turned to look at Negasonic, who was, of fucking course, on her phone. "Oh, no, finish your tweet. Just give us a second. There you go, hashtag it. Go get her tiger."

He watched as Negasonic threw her phone over her shoulder and then ran forwards. She turned, before his eyes, into a fiery ball, throwing Angel back.

Wade whistled. "Oh, I so pity the dude who pressures her into prom sex."

Getting slowly to her feet, Angel did not look happy. Turning to the men she had come with, she yelled to them, "Alright then. Fire!"

The men started to shoot at them, forcing Negasonic and Wade to scramble behind cover. Colossus, being metal and all, did not have to worry about something as silly as cover. He just got to his feet as if the bullets hitting him was rain. He even was able to attack some of the men by grabbing a giant tire from one of the trash piles and throwing it at the men, hitting some and sending them flying to the ground.

Wade glared at Colossus as he walked past. "Finish fucking her the fuck up!" he ordered.

"Language, please!" Colossus reprimanded.

"Suck a cock!" Wade yelled back.

Still, Colossus and Angel started to fight, leaving one of the baddies entertained, but that still left the men shooting at them…and shooting at them. Fuck, he had to do something about those men, but he had to get their attention off Negasonic first.

Thanking every god he could think of for Amy having the foresight to add a fly to his suit – and action he had done many times before – Wade zipped it down and started to, painfully might he add, pull his underwear off. He saw Negasonic looking over with curiosity and rapidly shook his head. "Look away, child. Look away!"

Finally getting the underwear free, he grabbed a rusted, discarded pipe and lifted it up and waved it, using it as a mock flag of surrender. The men stopped shooting, likely due to confusion, which gave Wade enough time to pop up and shout, "Wait! Wait!" He smiled as no one shot a bullet towards him. "Hey, you only work for that shit spackled muffin fart! So, I'mma give y'all a chance to lay down your firearms, in exchange for preferential, borderline gentle, possibly lover-like treatment."

The men started shooting again, making Wade shake his head at their no good, terrible decision. "Fine! Commando."

He popped over his makeshift shield and started to fight off the men. He could hear Colossus and Angel fighting – the man was not quiet about it at all – and he could vaguely hear Negasonic blasting a few people away with her considerable skill set of fire.

They went on like this, killing and killing and fighting one person – Colossus was that annoying person in a group project, it seemed – until Wade stopped short of killing his next and last target. He blinked, recognizing the man. "Bob?"

"Wade?" the man asked, sounding just as incredulous as Wade felt.

"Oh my god, I haven't seen you since –"

"Jacksonville, TGI Friday's."

"TGI Friday's." Shaking his head, Wade sheathed his swords. "What the hell! Come here you." Beckoning as if to give Bob a hug, he headbutted the man, knocking him out. The man fell limp into his waiting arms, allowing Wade to continue his conversation and to start working on his project. "How are the kids? Good? And Gale, she still fixing that tuna casserole? So good. Bad for the waistline if you know what I mean."

It took him time, time he probably shouldn't have spent. But it was all worth it when, after he had arranged all the fallen men, and Bob, into 'Francis.' He yoo-hooed for Francis, making him come forwards with a slumped and dejected Amy – two words he never wanted to use to describe her again – and a very angry Vanessa, who, judging by the glare she was giving him, had been caught up to speed about what he had been doing lately. They were joined by several men, decked out in the same uniform as the men below, pointing guns down.

He frowned as he saw Francis saw something to Amy and Vanessa that made the latter switch her glare to the asshat.

"Don't worry, I'm coming," Wade vowed, his eyes first going to Amy and then switching to Vanessa.

Evidently, Francis gave an order to fire, because Wade was very suddenly ducking out of range of the bullets, looking around for a cover. He paused and then grinned when he heard Negasonic call over to him, "Hey! Climb on."

Nodding, Wade climbed onto a rusted piece of metal and waited as Negasonic powered up behind it. Suddenly, he was blown into the air, landing heavily and rather painfully onto the platform. It took him a minute to gather himself, and then it took him a minute longer to get to his feet, acutely aware of several bones repairing rapidly.

He started to walk down the platform, growing angrier and angrier until he was able to see Francis – but the sight of that British ass upset him even more, because he wasn't alone. Next to him, in a horrible familiar machine that Wade still had nightmares about, was Vanessa. He could tell she was more than a bit scared by the way she was struggling against the bonds strapping her down, and she also seemed very, very angry judging by the words she was screaming.

He frowned, seeing Amy a couple of feet away, zip-tied to a pole. She tried to give him a smile, but its effect was ruined by the tears running down her face and the large, red, hand-shaped mark on her face.

"Motherfucker should have worn his brown pants," Wade growled, mainly to himself as he took in Francis, who had an amused smirk. "You're right Vanessa," he called over to her. "Red really is my color."

He watched as Vanessa gave him an exasperated look. Clearly, she had been caught up to speed. He heard her say, with less enthusiasm then he had imagined, "Wade, get me out of here!"

Wade nodded. "Don't worry," he reassured. "I'm gonna get you out of that shitbox."

Francis just continued to smirk inanely. "I thought you'd be pleased," he said in a mocking voice. "After all, Amy is safe and sound. I figured you wouldn't care about Vanessa. When was the last time you spoke with her again?" The sneer was evident in his tone. "Still, what better way to get inside that head of yours?"

"Oh, you never left," Wade vowed, somehow making those four words sound extremely threatening.

As if she couldn't help herself, Vanessa called over to him "But you did, asshole!" The reminder of his failings made Wade wince.

Francis, however, just laughed. "Ah, take a deep breath darling. Oh wait, wrong choice of words." He turned the machine on, causing Vanessa to star to gasp desperately for breath. Still on the pole nearby, Amy started to yell over at Francis, struggling against the zip-ties.

Wade took his swords out, glaring fiercely at Francis, who stepped away from the machine. "I hope they've blocked pain to your every last nerve, cause I'mma go looking!"

"You grow back body parts now, Wade? When I'm finished, parts'll have to grow back you," Francis replied.

Wade couldn't help but chuckle. "Good one. Yeah, that was a good one," he admitted, before he got his game face back on – a removal no one had seen in the first place because of the mask. "Let's dance. And by dance, I mean let's try to kill each other."

The two men began to fight, Wade using his two swords a ferocious manner that was matched fairly evenly by Francis. Despite the likely hood of him loosing the fight, Wade ended up sacrificing one of his two swords to throw over and into the oxygen machine, causing it to stop and for Vanessa, once she had recovered her breath, to work towards free herself.

But soon, Francis and Wade were lacking their weapons. Francis wiped away a dribble of blood coming out of his mouth and then spat the rest onto the ground. "Fine, fists."

"Sounds like your last Saturday night," Wade taunted.

The two men went at again, and, as Wade had expected, Francis played dirty. He tried to avoid allowing Francis to punch him in a good spot to knife, but alas, he failed – mainly because Francis decided to stop trying to hide his blade and instead directly stabbed Wade in the head. As Wade went down, he watched, not fully understanding, as Francis was stabbed by two women – a dark-haired one and a red-haired one. Francis kept the sword in as he turned and threw both of them to the ground.

Wade watched, seeing little, cartoon creatures appearing around the red-haired one. Hearts and a cupid and the vague sound of an 80's song...Angel of the Morning, which made sense because…because…the red-head was an angel, an angel calling his name frantically, telling him to remove something, but what?

Oh yeah, the knife.

Wade pulled the knife out of his head and heard a zipping noise as the music stopped playing and the cartoons disappeared. That was likely a good sign. He started towards Francis, fully planning on destroying him, when something creaked.

He paused, Francis paused, Amy and Vanessa paused. The creak happened again, this time accompanied by a large and loud groan. The platform they were on suddenly titled furiously forwards, throwing the entire group off balance. A crate appeared, sliding off as well, and collided with Francis, sending the British man off the platform.

Wade ran over to Amy and Vanessa and grabbed both of them.

"Wade!" Vanessa gasped. She had been fruitlessly holding onto Amy before, and was more than surprised to find a person in between them.

"I've got you two. I got a plan, but you both aren't gonna like it."

He grabbed onto the oxygen machine and pulled both Vanessa and Amy inside of it. Thankfully, it was wide enough, and Amy was short enough that the fit was snug – but it worked.

The platform tilted further, causing Wade and the lower part of the machine to dangle off the edge of it. "Don't worry, I'm totally on top of this," Wade reassured. But this did not comfort either of the women, especially when the platform started to fall faster…and faster. Wade looked behind him, and then back at the machine, where both Vanessa and Amy were staring at him frantically.

"Damn it!" He cursed. "Maximum effort!"

Taking a deep breath, he put everything in his throw, flinging the machine off the platform and as far away as possible. He could vaguely hear two female voices screaming his name as the platform fell swiftly on top of him, but soon the voices disappeared.

And Wade Wilson, the man who couldn't die, allowed himself to pass out.

Oh my gosh, we're nearly done :(! I've loved writing Amy's and Wade's romance, mainly because it was very slow building.

For this chapter, I originally had it split up into two short chapters, but I liked the mega long chapter better. It made more sense and felt way more natural. I have realized that I cannot write action very well, so I apologize for my lack of skill in this department. It will be something I will hopefully improve on by the time the second movie is out. I hope you guys like the chapter, though. I really liked having Vanessa and Amy bond a bit on screen instead of off.

One more actual chapter and then we have the after credit scene.