Pairing: Ash/Misty, hints of others
Genre: Humor/Romance
Rating: T
Summary: In which a new website unleashes a world of Teenage Hormones.
Requested By: AshPli
XOX
How stupid.
No, Ash Ketchum would not be purchasing a smart-dex, he would not be registering for this new application titled pokebook and no matter what Brock told him, he did not care what Misty Waterflower, or any of her sisters were doing at any given time during the day now, or ten days from now. If she really wanted to talk with him, she could call him; or send a letter—or hey, she could maybe even visit once in awhile!
"C'mon, Ash, even pikachu has a page." Brock flashed his new smart-dex to Ash, who immediately threw his head to one side and pursed his lips.
"No way, Brock! I'm not signing on for some stupid website so I can tune in to everyone's life twenty-four seven! It's an invasion of privacy and-"
"Since when did you care about that?" Brock interrupted, flabbergasted by the young man's startling response. Ash cleared his throat shortly after.
"Well, then I'll just be over here then, looking at shared pictures—and whoa.. Man, she's really grown up."
"Who has grown up?" Ash asked, eyes twitching, trying to ignore the obvious bait.
"Oh, nothing you would care abo—is that Max? Oh man I didn't think-" Brock stopped, staring at Ash who looked over his shoulder in awe. Brock smacked his lips.
"I mean, not that you'd care after all."
Ash rolled his eyes. "C'mon, Brock. I care, I just don't want my life advertised online, it's hard enough staying out of the media, you know."
Brock cleared his throat. "Riiiight, 'fraid all those secret hook ups are gonna finally reach the light of day." Had Brock been looking at Ash, who nearly choked on his own tongue, he might have suspected something fishy. "Your image is squeaky clean—what's getting a social media account going to do? Make it easier to hear from your friends?"
The sting in his voice made it very apparent that Brock was jabbing at Ash's constant away-time; he spent less and less time in Kanto after each league, and he spent more time training and traveling than he did making new companions. If it wasn't for Brock, who pestered him with weekly calls, Ash would probably cease to exist to the human world. Ash's lips flat lined, and he shook his head.
"C'mon, Brock, you know I miss everyone. I just don't like stuff like that."
"You sound so old!" Brock gasped, "Where's your freedom, man? Look, Just try it out for a week; see how everyone is doing, and if you still don't like it, you can delete your account and return the smart-dex." Brock offered, handing Ash the red and black portable device.
Ash stared down at it for a long time, weighing his options. He could leave the device, tell Brock that he didn't have interest and result in the possible alienation of his best friend; or, he could accept the phone, play this game for a week, and then return it without any lash back—the decision was clear to him.
"Alright, but only one week." Ash muttered, taking the phone from Brock who flashed Ash a quick thumbs up.
"You won't be disappointed, I promise. I'll just run along then." Proud of himself, Brock tilted his chin at Ash, "Look me up." He winked, then took off into the Ketchum resident, leaving Ash on the front step, holding a glorified paperweight that glowed unearthed shades of white, and frowned deeply.
"Yeah-huh." Ash offered in short-supply of excitement while staring at the glowing screen.
Welcome to Pokebook! Login in, Sign in, or Learn More!
A frustrated groan escaped his lips, and he let his head hit the door frame. Ash didn't much care for technology.
XOX
Anything is possible with science! That's what Ash had to keep telling himself while he sat up on his bed, flipping through the new smart-dex Brock lent him. Two hours later, and he still didn't create an account. He was supposed to, he knew, that was the deal—but there was no way that Brock was keeping that close of tabs on-
"Hey, did'ya make an account yet?"
Ash jumped from his bed, throwing covers over himself, feeling indecent, though he was dressed. The whole website made him feel exposed and raw. Brock didn't notice.
"I'll be waiting for that friend request." He said in a slow tone leaving Ash in his room with a thumbs up. Ash stared back at the phone, fell backwards, and growled. Even Pikachu had an account, huh? So that's what the mouse was doing on his free time at the pokemon centers—playing on Pokebook. Least it made sense how Pikachu knew what people were doing more than Ash did.
Besides, what could it hurt? He hadn't talked with most of his companions in years, not since returning from out of the league three years ago—what could a week of catching up online do? Ash was quick to adapt, and, after all, anything was possible with science. ...He only hoped Clemont was right.
So, he made an account. It wasn't hard, it only wanted all of his information and first born son as an offering to this creator 'Marvin Zuckerice', it was worse than that guy to who created pokeSpace some years ago; except this one was still around.
DOB: May 22
Age: 18
Bio, likes, relationship status, religious affiliation, job, school, location; hometown-
Ash looked away from the screen to exhale, the sign-up page was about a mile long, longer than most league applications, and if Ash was looking to apply for a job, it seemed longer than an application! Eventually, he decided to skip past the 'optional' answers, and floated down to the very bottom of the page which read simply.
Create account.
Okay, he could do that, easy peasy! Now he could put the phone down and Brock could leave him alone, and he wouldn't have to worry about anything-
You're almost done, check out your privacy settings, would you like to take a profile picture, let us help you set up your timeline-
Skip. Skip. Skip. Ash clicked the button a million times, until eventually he was met with an empty timeline, his only friend a goose egg and a severe amount of white background, and
Suggestions.
People you may know:Brock Harrison Thanks, Brock, Pikachu Ketchum, Delia Ketchum—Did his mom have a pokebook, too?! Gary MF Oak—At least Gary was keeping it classy-Samuel Oak, who was Samuel Oak? Ritchie Notashcopy—Hey! Ash hadn't seen Ritchie in years.
His first destination was clicking on the former rivals face, being led away to another loading screen until a screen with a large background over the top, and a tiny photo was placed above his name in bold writing. Beneath that: Add friend, Follow, message, …
Curious, Ash clicked the dots leading him to several new prompts that he immediately clicked away from: Block, poke, see friendship—whatever those meant.
Finally; the fun part: About, (A piece Ash completely ignored), Photos, and friends.
Well, Ash was supposed to find a bunch of his friends—what better way to do that than start here? He could find everyone at once, add them, thin the herd, and feel less guilty in the coming months.
He clicked add friend on Ritchie's profile, opened up his list of friends; and started clicking on every picture that looked familiar—the task was far easier than he imagined, instead of going to each profile as he suspected originally, which would take him years, he could simply click "add friend" wait for the "request sent" prompt, and be done with it.
This would be too easy!
Names and faces flew by like numbers, and before the clock hit ten, Ash 'friended' probably half of the pokemon league—people he saw only once or twice when he was younger; larger people in his life like May, and Dawn, and the Waterflower sisters—he even found Melody, and Casey, and Trip, and Paul (Which he wouldn't lie, knowing Paul had one made Ash a little more relaxed. ) Gym leaders were accepting requests, even Sabrina, the psychic woman had an account that was open to requests! It was like a whole new world, where social status didn't exist, and everyone knew everyone.
And now Ash was apart of that world.
For a week. At most.
"Well, that was easy enough!" Ash complimented himself while tossing his smart-dex down onto the nightstand beside his bed. Ash collapsed into a sigh of relief, stretching his arms above his head and relaxing.
"That's one day down, and now to sleep-" bzzzz. One eye opened in the dark of his bedroom, and he turned over very slowly at the object which bleeped green light into his otherwise pitch black room. You know what; a website was not going to ruin his sleep. If someone had something to say to him—or the website was crashing, he honestly didn't know what was going on, it could wait until morning.
Bzzz! Ding. Bzzz
Erupted from the smart-dex and Ash quickly grabbed the phone. "Don't you people sleep?" He mumbled, rubbing his eyes before flicking the screen on and pulling down the menu.
New Message from...
You have new friend requests!
Pokebook update, don't leave your friends waiting—update your profile now.
Ash felt his face twitch in several places while the unfamiliar feeling of dread filled his chest, and he pulled at the phone and lifted it above his face while sorting through the list.
Gary MF Oakwroteon your timeline:
"ASHY-BOY, you finally made an account. Good to see you're finally advancing in life."
Brock Harrison, Misty Waterflower, May Maple and three others liked this.
Misty Waterflower wrote on your timeline:
"Boo! What happened to all that nonsense about social media turning people into zombies? Welcome to the undead."
Gary MF Oak Liked this.
Brock Harrison wrote: "Misty, be nice, he's still shy! He doesn't even have a profile picture."
Misty Waterflowerwrote: "So it was your doing? Did you bribe him or something?"
Inhaling and panicked over the sudden millions of notifications and messages being sent to his smart-dex, Ash did what he did best.
Ashton B. Ketchum wrote: "He did noy brib me i decided to giveit a try for a week"
Ash's bulky fingers on the small touch screen were like trying to thread a needle with his eyes closed—wasn't there supposed to be some kind of helpful auto-correct, or something?
May Maple and Dawn Matthews reacted to this, Brock Harrison, Misty Waterflower, Gary MF Oak, Ritchie Notashcopy liked this.
Misty Waterflower wrote: "Oh, man. Looks like we have a typing amateur over here. Did Brock not show you how to turn on auto-correct?"
Infuriated by her response, he could see the snark look on her face and glared at her little icon before replying:
Ashton B. Ketchum wrote: "I dont need it. Ust because you need somone to check your speeling doenst mean mine is bad"
He replied quickly and knew his response would leave her speechless! Ash didn't need to get accustomed to how this technology worked, he would only use it for a week, anyways. Maybe his atrocious writing would put off his friends, anyways?
Dawn Matthews tagged you in a post:
"Hey, guys, Ashton B. Ketchum finally made a face book—let's make him feel welcome! -smiley face-
It's good to hear from you again, but your profile is kind of empty! You should update it!
Have you entered any new leagues! You should call me! Or message me!
(The note was concluded with a gushing picture of a piplup and Ash shook his head, watching the numbers roll in)"
Misty Waterflower, Brock Harrison, Gary MF. Oak, Iris D. and sixteen others liked this post.
Six comments (and growing), mostly filled with "welcome to pokebook, Ash!", followed by an ever growing list of likes, and an increasing amount of friend requests filled his eyes for the next five minutes while Ash tried to pull the reigns on all the excitement. Maybe 'friending' so many people at one time was insane! He should have started slow!
Iris D. posted on your timeline:
"I see you don't have a photo for your profile picture yet, how about this one?"
Below was a large picture of Ash staring at a camera looking bashfully confused, wearing a yellow wig and a pink, frilly dress. The color left Ash's face, recalling the incident in Unova where he was forced to dress as a girl and he dropped his smart-dex.
Serena Yvonne reacted to this.
Serena Yvonne wrote: "o.o"
Misty Waterflower wrote: "Oh, I love the make up, Ash. I didn't know you were still into cross dressing!"
Iris D., Dawn Matthews, Brock Harrison, Max Maple, Gary MF Oak, and 4 others liked this comment.
Ashton B. Ketchum: "Shut up Misty! Iris delete that wht is wrong with yu?!"
Daisy Waterflower: "Oh, Ash, you look, like, so cute! Do you want to come do a show with us? You'd make a great princess!"
Ash dropped his smart-dex, kicked it across the room, and dived into his pillows and hid from the sound of the pulsating bleeps and obnoxious buzzes from across the room in favor of forcing himself to fall asleep. What in the world kind of hell was that place!? Where did Iris even get that picture—when did she take that picture?!
He felt so humiliated, and it was because of that damn website.
Ash exhaled, but that was okay, he only need to make it one week, after that, he could pretend the whole thing never happened...and take a long cruise to Alola again and spend a few months on an island somewhere far, far away, isolated from technology and his friends. Was this the wonderful world of the internet?
XOX
Ash didn't touch the smart-dex for most of the next morning, Brock took the train home that morning, laughing gleefully in Ash's expense, and gloated about how fun the website was! How connected everyone was. Yeah, Ash felt connected alright, to a growing level of discord and hate.
They said their goodbyes, and Ash spent most of the day helping his mother around the house with some chores. Since she started working at the garden center, she hadn't been able to clean out the basement, so Ash was removing boxes and carrying them to the garbage when his back pocket vibrated. After the charade last night, most of his friends stopped messaging him—or at the very least were too busy to do so this early in the morning. Thankful for the break, he let out a loud sigh of frustration when the phone vibrated. Pikachu had been avoiding him all morning, playing with Mr. Mime in the meadow and enjoying it's leisure time taunting Ash and mocking him for his innate lack of skill. He had to ask the pokemon to turn on his auto-correct for him, since he wasn't sure.
A part of him missed Clemont, at least the blonde's technology resulted in the occasional explosion, not in embarrassing pictures. Needless to say, Ash was a bit nervous checking the application once more. He had no idea what he was walking into, would it be nightmare fuel? Or...
Clicking the application open to see the flood of notifications—34, and 12 messages, as well as 45 friend requests (man, was he popular or what?), Ash grimaced while finding his way to the living room couch. He still had tons of stuff to carry from down stairs, so he had no idea what possessed him to sit around and check his phone for replies; search for damage.
The first thing he saw was a timeline; his friends timeline.
Daisy Waterflower posted a picture: "I swear, she's more man than woman."
Below was the wonderful image of Misty holding a squirming, newborn pokemon with gloves up to her elbows and mud on the front of her yellow blouse (it might not have been mud, but he wasn't going to ask)—not to mention the obscene gesture of her tongue poking out of her mouth, and eyes squeezed closed like some 80's hairband. Ash chuckled, flicked the like button, and left a snooty comment.
Ashton B. Ketchum wrote: "Good to see you keeping it classy Mist."
Daisy Waterflwer liked this.
Immediate gratification emerged in his chest upon witnessing his first liked comment and he sat up a little straighter while scrolling past a few advertisements.
Sixteen things every pokemon trainer should know!
Ten Easy steps to becoming a pokemon master!
Pesky zubats infestation? Three easy steps to be rid of them for life!
Of course, being new, Ash clicked them all. He didn't know there was so much he didn't know! Could he really teach pikachu skills that only a raichu could learn if he was standing on his head!?
Dawn Matthews posted on her timeline:
"I'm not ready for this appeal match! Two more battles for the crown and I've obtained my title!"
Ashton B. Ketchum wrote: "You will do great Dawn! Is it time for a new grand festival already?"
Dawn Matthews replied: "Yes! And I'm so nervous! I'm battling May Mapleafter this appeal round—is it possible for both of us to win!?"
May Maple wrote: "Don't worry. We've both worked really had these last few years. No hard feelings when I kick your butt, okay?"
Dawn Matthews wrote: "Who said you were going to kick my butt! I'll wipe the floor with you!"
Ashton B. Ketchum wrote: "Guys, don't fight over this. You both are going to do great."
May Maple, Dawn Matthews, You, Brock Harrison, and three others liked this.
Drew Hayden wrote: "But May is still going to win."
Brock Harrison wrote: "Down boy! You'll start a cat fight before the match even begins!"
Before Ash could see the wall-drama continue, he backed out of the conversation and scrolled along his feed. That was apparently a bad idea. Grunting, he hoped that Dawn and May were just kidding, they weren't seriously fighting over who would win, were they? Did people normally fight like this?
Feeling a gurgling in his stomach, he decided to check his notifications finally—most of them were replies to his comments, being tagged in posts, being tagged in pictures (apparently, that 'Ash cross dresses' thing resulted in everyone sharing experiences!) and tagged in comments. Brock linked him to several hundred battle network reports about himself: Ash had no idea he was so … popular.
Then the rest were comments onto his timeline from people who hadn't seen in years, asking him how he was doing, what was going on his life; and one in particular was...
Melody G. wrote on your timeline:
"Heeeeey Ashy! Long time no see, you haven't been to the Orange islands in years, even though you're the 'champion' here.
How's life as the chosen one? Saw what you did in Kalos region a few weeks ago. Great job, you're a local hero here, still!
….hey, you still single? Just curious!
xoxoxo"
Ash nearly choked on his tongue—What!? Why would she ask that, and why were so many people curious. Fourteen comments, twenty-three likes for what!? Curiosity bit into his soul, and he followed the link again.
Misty Waterflower wrote: "He's married to his training."
Melody G. replied: "Awh, Misty! Are you planning to visit again anytime soon?"
Serena Yvonne wrote: "I didn't know Ash was a champion already! (: He never talked about you guys!"
Gary MF Oak wrote: "It's because the Orange Islands is a joke of a league!"
Tracey Sketchit wrote: "I am insulted on behalf of all people from the Orange Islands! How would you know anyways? I don't see you challenging Ash!"
Gary MF Oak wrote: "I don't have to because I'd win! Only a loser would brag about winning there."
Serena Yvonne wrote: "Ash isn't a loser!"
Misty Waterflower wrote: "Gary. I think you need to pull up your pants."
Gary MF Oak wrote: "...why?"
Misty Waterflower wrote: "Your asshole is showing again."
Brock Harrison wrote: "HAHAHAHAHA."
Max Maple wrote: "HAHAHAH. Sick burn Misty."
Dawn Matthews, May Maple, Tracey Sketchit, Erica F. and three others liked this comment.
Misty Waterflower wrote: "I know, thank you, thank you."
Serena Yvonne: "Yeah, you guys are really funny. I hope we haven't scared you away Ash! Don't forget to update a profile picture soon! On se parle bientot!"
Bonnie L., Clemont, L., Miette, and four others liked this comment.
Shaking his head back and forth to clear his mind, Ash swallowed the lump in his throat, contained his own giggles, then looked over his shoulder to see a snide pikachu glaring knowing at his grin.
"Shut up, pikachu." Ash barked, slipping his phone into his pocket and retreating to the privacy of is bedroom, away from the judgmental eyes of his pokemon, who knew just how much he was against the website before—but what could he say; it was actually a little fun! People he had no idea knew each other were talking and trading comments; it was like some personal keepsake of his friends. Maybe it wasn't so bad after all.
Once in the confinement of his own room, with the windows closed, and the door locked, Ash took a fevered seat on his bed, and opened the application up once more; this time, a bit more eagerly. He scrolled through timelines, most of his old companions—Brock's was full of half-naked girls and medical information when he wasn't gushing over his friends and family; Misty wasn't active in posting her own material, most of her updates came from Daisy tagging her, and Misty's prevalent trolling on the website. Tracey posted his art work; even had a page dedicated to it—and holy shit, were he and Daisy dating? Why were there so many pictures of them kissing!?
Seeing Tracey kissing Daisy as his profile picture opened a new can of worms for Ash, as he went on a mission to see what else he missed—apparently, Dawn, donning the title 'it's complicated', posted a million pictures of her and Zoey; Ash was blind, but he wasn't that blind! May was clearly dating Drew—wherever that came from, Ash would never know. While May's updates consisted mostly of a mountain of delicious looking recipes (Ash decided he liked May's timeline the most, because food) Drew was apparently the closet gushy type, because his profile picture was of his nose snuggling into May's cheek while she focused on her dinner plate: their relationship in a nutshell, he guessed.
Then there were the bloggers, Cilan, for example, liked to write a good morning and good night post every single day, which was always countered by a snark Iris who only posted embarrassing photos of her friends, apparently; she had a whole folder of them. Ash's mom, who he friended reluctantly, posted on everyone's status update. Brock made groups for get-togethers—Ash already had three for the next two months—and his rivals had some keen sense of photography, and those were only the profiles he looked at!
Clemont turned his entire page into a science test, Bonnie spammed people in worse grammar than his own, and Gary had literal pages designated to his ego.
The internet was a scary place.
What was even more scary was that Ash dedicated the remaining eight hours of the day glued to his smart-dex. It was like an addiction he couldn't scratch, and so he nosily filtered through more and more of his friends' lives!
By the time he laid down to sleep, his head ached, and his muscles were sore from doing nothing but laying in bed all day. He felt more exhausted now than he did walking twenty miles in one direction! But he felt so alive; filled with the burning desire to read more, maybe make his own comments. He was fairly successful after all, and everyone was asking about him?
Maybe tomorrow he'd finally post that profile picture.
XOX
Ash woke up and immediately grabbed his smart-dex, he barely slept four hours before waking to the sound of a gentle buzz that he had to check. Once the object was clutched in his hands, he nuzzled back into his pillows, and discovered a new source of notifications, and messages; there was an extreme drop, of course—to be expected—so today he decided he would reply to messages.
Thirteen unread messages:
Brock Harrison: "ASH. WHY ARE YOU NOT REPLYING TO ME?"
Ash raised his eyebrows and clicked a few keys.
Ashton B. Ketchum: "Still trying to figure everything out. How's Pewter City?"
Then he moved to the next message,
Melody G.: "Hey, who's that blonde girl in that picture of you from the Kalos region? She's reallllly pretty. New girlfriend?"
Ash raised a questionable eyebrow.
Ashton B. Ketchum: "New girlfriend? And that's Serena, she traveled with me in Kalos. How have you been Melody? Staying away from boats, I hope."
Surprising to Ash, she replied immediately.
Melody G.: "Oh, you know. I just figured because you both looked so close is all. I live on an island, how can I stay away from boats? Have you talked to Misty yet?"
Ash's brow lowered.Ashton B. Ketchum: "No? And thanks I guess"
Since she didn't reply again, Ash exited out of the screen, and flicked to the next message...which was from the devil herself—speak her name and she will be summoned, he supposed. The last message was from yesterday.
Misty Waterflower: "Hey! Are you in Pallet Town right now?"
Ash blinked several times, unsure of how to answer that. He was, technically, but given his massive free time; she should have already deduced that.
Ashton B. Ketchum: "Yup."
Haha! This was easy! When he saw that she read the message, and dots started eagerly typing, then faded away, he discovered a new feeling; anticipation. Suddenly, he felt his response was not accurate enough, and in lieu of her delayed response, he typed immediately.
Ashton B. Ketchum: "Why? What's up?"
Misty Waterflower: "No reason, I was just wondering. Where do you think you'll be going next?" At her quick response, Ash let out a breath he didn't know he was holding, and fidgeted with his phone.
Ashton B. Ketchum: "Not sure yet."
Again, she started to reply, then stopped, and Ash felt the impending dread in his chest. This time, he ignored it in favor of backing out of the odd-feeling invoking conversation, and move onto the next one.
Delia Ketchum: "Hiii sweetie! Welcome to Pokebook!"
Ashton B. Ketchum: "Thanks mom, but we live in the same house, you know."
She was also at work, so he knew he wouldn't get a reply until she was home. Not that it mattered anyways, Ash flicked to the next screen, which was a message from Gary.
Gary MF Oak: "Hey, are you in Pallet Town?"
Ashton B. Ketchum: "Yep. Only until the end of the week. Where are you?" instantly read, no reply. Not that Ash was surprised, Gary was either super friendly, or snooty—sometimes he had relapses, and that was okay. Ash just didn't want to deal with them. While switching back to review a message left by May who from what he could see from the clip was spazzing out, Melody replied.
Melody G.: "just wondering. You two used to be so close."
Insulted, Ash snorted.
Ashton B. Ketchum: "We are still close. I'm just traveling to new places, and she's running her gym."
Melody G.: "Oh...So you're 'close' then? How close would you say?" Ash's face screwed up while reading the comment; was he missing something? Did she mean close physically? Because physically Misty was a few miles away.
Ashton B. Ketchum: "Pretty close? Are you asking in a physical way or a friendly way?"
Melody G.: "You guys are physically close?"
Ashton B. Ketchum: "Not right now. She's in Cerulean City."
Her replies came faster. Melody G.: "But you have been before?!"
What a stupid question, of course he has been! They traveled together for three years!
Ashton B. Ketchum: "Well, yeah, of course. We used to spend a lot of time together." he paused, eyebrow dancing furiously. Something wasn't right here.
Ashton B. Ketchum: "Why so many questions about Misty?"
Melody didn't reply right away, but Misty did. He also had six notifications shoot off in under a couple of seconds and his lips curled curiously. Before he could check, however, said red haired vixen replied to his message immediately, flooding his screen.
Misty Waterflower: "What the fuck, Ash!?" Worried, he felt sweat pool at the back of his neck, and he realized he wasn't having fun with this anymore.
Misty Waterflower: "Where do you get off telling Melody that, you pervert!"
Ashton B. Ketchum: "What? Telling Melody what?"
Misty Waterflower: "Don't play innocent! You haven't had an account for longer than a week and you're already screwing with my reputation, THANKS."
Ash moved to reply, but in her haste, she must have blocked him, or something, because the confused rambling of an apology refused to send, and he couldn't click on her profile picture anymore. Reeling back, his eyes shifted around the room, and he decided to find the source of the problem; which was a reel of notifications blowing up.
Melody G. tagged you in a post:
"You heard it here first, folks: Ashton B. Ketchum and Misty Waterflower (Her name was strangely grayed out for him) are dating! Well, if not dating, they sure have one hell of a secret 'relation'ship.
Xoxox's~"
Ash then realized two things: Melody wrote the gossip column for those articles featuring click bait "Ten things you need to know about pokemon masters to woo them"... only, he was now the click bait, and people believed her!
Brock Harrison, May Maple, Serena Yvonne reacted to this, Max Maple, Gary MF Oak and eighteen others liked this.
Brock Harrison wrote: "I saw you like three hours ago, Ash, how come you didn't tell me!? I thought we were friends!"
May Maple wrote: "Cheer up, Brock! Hey, Drew, we have someone to go on double dates with!"
Serena Yvonne wrote: "o.o"
Gary MF Oak wrote: "What kind of 'relations'? Because he better not be trying to breed."
Drew Hayden wrote: Lol. No.
Serena Yvonne wrote: "...wow, congratulations."
Bonnie L. wrote: "ASH HOW CUD U DO THIS!?"
Misty Waterflower wrote: "Could you guys relax? Ash is a nimrod and Melody's a gossip (A poor one, at that). There is NOTHING going on between us. This is just like that time she tried to say Brock had sex with Nurse Joy. It's just not happening!"
Serena Yvonne liked this comment.
Dawn Matthews wrote: "Well, I wouldn't say 'nothing', he did after all carry a fishing lure with your face on it. Sometimes I think I woke up to him making out with it."
Brock Harrison wrote: "Thanks for throwing me under the bus, Misty! I thought we could all forget about that!"
Ashton B. Ketchum wrote: "WHAT THE DUCK DAWN? I DID NOT."
Dawn Matthews wrote: "For an innocent man, you sure are denying it pretty loudly."
Brock Harrison liked this comment.
Brock Harrison wrote: "Can verify. Ash's first kiss was with a fishing lure."
Ashton B. Ketchum wrote: "It was not! What is wrong with you two?!"
Brock Harrison wrote: "Hey, if I'm going down, I'm taking you all down with me. Dawn likes BDSM."
Paul Shinji liked this comment.
Misty Waterflower wrote: "I hate all of you. So much. T.T"
Dawn Matthews wrote: "Love you too, Red. (Also, meeeoooww Brocko)"
Zoey M. wrote: "Kinky."
Misty Waterflower wrote: "Melody, if you don't take this post down, I'm telling your sister about last summer!"
Melody G. wrote: "Oh, chill out, Misty, I was just playing around. Don't get your virgin panties in a twist."
Ash had see enough, he dropped his smart-dex, leaving it on his bed while more messages sang. He didn't care what they said anymore, he just wanted to not be around it. Grabbing his coat while pulling on a pair of blue jeans, Ash fled his bedroom as if it caught fire, and made headway to the lab on the hill.
His friends were crazy, and Pokebook was evil.
XOX
"You know, you can't run away forever." Tracey said while swiveling in the lab chair while he motioned to Ash to had him a pair of tweezers.
"Is it always that bad, Tracey? I've been on there for two days and I feel my sanity slowly slipping away." Tracey spared a glance to his one-time companion, then stared back at his work reconstructing a pokemon's skull.
"It dies down after a little while. Everyone is just stoked to see you, I guess. Besides, if you think it's bad now, wait until you really are in a relationship."
"is it horrible?" Ash asked, brows knitting together.
"No, no one asks you anything because once you've become pokebook official, you're boring." Ash's eyebrows rose in response and he tilted his head in confusion while Tracey elaborated.
"That's why all the most interesting people have their relationship status tagged 'complicated' don't you know?" While speaking, Tracey smiled to Ash and dusted his hands off.
"I didn't even know you and Daisy were dating. Congratulations if I've forgotten to say it before."
Tracey shrugged
"Eh, it's not like we advertised it, anyways. Besides, you didn't have a pokebook, so how would you be expected to know?"
Ash's face fell. "...because you could have told me, you know? Not all the information about my friends has to be taken from some...website. I do like talking to you guys."
"Yeah, but phone calls and emails are outdated, it's easier this way to stay in contact. It's just part of the new times."
Ash set his chin down on the desk and exhaled while pikachu tapped on the community computer, being more efficient with his own networking than Ash ever could be.
"I don't like the new times."
XOX
Misty Waterflower: About, photos, friends.
Why was he here again? She did seem pretty mad, but Misty over reacted to things all the time, certainly this wasn't going to be a big deal?
The first image he saw was one that Daisy took of her sitting on a worn, green couch, huddling a large red pillow, and wearing a yellow hoodie—Lily sat beside her pointing at the television, but Misty stared into the camera; she knew it was there, and she was pissed that someone was taking a picture of her.
The caption was what made him feel guilty though.
Daisy Waterflower wrote: "Cheer up little sister, it's only a flesh wound."
A flesh wound of what sort! He refused to comment, or give any indication he was stalking her page for answers. All the way down he could see, over ninety percent of her posts belong to Daisy, the other ten percent were shared information of upcoming league information and tournaments; and the occasional advertisement for a water ballet or swimming lessons offered at the gym.
Why was he here?
The last day of his sentence, he was positive he wasn't going to keep this stupid pokebook after the last few days incident. His mother came home in tears, demanding grandchildren and apologies. She spent the second half of the day baking her emotions away, and Ash decided he was going to spend some time sleeping at Tracey's house.
Dawn won the grand festival, she and May both celebrated with a party, and posted a million pictures of their extravagant adventure, Brock continued his trail of inappropriate content; and the whole Ash has a pokebook page blew over rather quickly. Serena would occasionally tag him in pictures—mostly stuff about childhood friends and friendships lasting a life time—he quickly discovered that the easiest way to reply was to like it quickly, and disregard the information. Yes, Ash Ketchum, he who wore his emotions on his sleeve, disregarded information because there was so much of it. He had no idea how people had so much time to post new content everyday! Where were they finding time in their busy schedules? If he was traveling right now, he had no idea how he could fit in time to check back with everyone and post status updates. It required a talent he didn't have.
Thus, when the time finally came to deactivate his account; it was only natural to stumble onto Misty's page. Everything went back to normal after Melody deleted that little post, but she hadn't messaged him since, and she seemed to eager to before.
Releasing his jitters with a sigh, Ash made the first move.
Ashton B. Ketchum posted to Misty's timeline:
"Hey, Misty. Why did you want to know if I was in Pallet Town?"
She was online, so she had to have read it! So she should have replied right away, right? Not that he was expecting her to—not that she should have been angry with him anyways!
Ashton B. Ketchum wrote: "I did not know Melody was going to post something like that! She asked if we were close and I said yes and then she asked if we were physically close and I said we used to be and I don't know where she got that idea from but there is no reason you should be mad at me."
Misty Waterflower replied: "I'm not mad at you. Besides, you don't owe me and explanation. Also, was just curious. Daisy is visiting Tracey soon."
It was too dry, unlike Misty. He saw her quips over the last few days, she had a loaded silver tongue if he ever saw one. No, she was upset. Otherwise, she would have smacked him down with sarcasm.
Ashton B. Ketchum wrote: "You curious? Please. Are you coming too?" It shouldn't have been weird, damn it, they have been friends for nine years. A little misunderstanding for the hundredth time about their standing as friends shouldn't have made him so twitchy! Why was he twitchy?!
Misty Waterflower wrote: "Eh, probably not. It's been really busy at the gym this season. Besides, aren't you leaving soon?"
Well duh.
Ashton B. Ketchum wrote: "Well, if you wanted to stop by I'd hang around a little longer. My mom needs help moving stuff from the attic, anyways. Something about missing several spring cleanings, idk."
Brock Harrison liked this comment—Ash saw the slip before he un-liked it, removing his name, and Ash's eyes narrowed.
Misty Waterflower wrote: "Ash Ketchum waiting on someone? Who died?" A grin tugged at his lips, that was much better; her insistent sarcasm meant she wasn't upset with him.
Ashton B. Ketchum wrote: "Har. Har. Besides, mom says you haven't stopped by in awhile! I can't imagine what you've been surviving off of at the gym food wise. Ramen every day will kill ya', you know."
Misty Waterflower wrote: "Excuse me? I'm a fairly good cook now, thank you. I can even make flavored ramen! I occasionally even eat vegetables. In my soup. How cool is that?!"
Ashton B. Ketchum wrote: "Right, meat shaped like vegetables doesn't count, Mist. So you're going to come by then?" Why did he seem so antsy.
Misty Waterflower wrote: "I dunno... it's been really busy here."
Dawn Matthews wrote: "OMG IF YOU TWO COULD STOP FLIRTING, that would be great! (i'm kidding, please continue) -hearts-"
Ash nearly spit out his drink, forgotten was the grin on his lips and looked around his room shamefully. He hadn't realized he was grinning, or nervous, or...were his hands shaking?!
Brock Harrison wrote: "No, please don't stop. I've been waiting for this my whole life. Now we need a confession, Ashton B. Ketchum?"
Ashton B. Ketchum wrote: "Confession...what confession?"
Misty Waterflower wrote: "Arceus, man, get out, Brock."
Brock Harrison wrote: "I CAN'T LET YOU RUIN THIS MOMENT."
Misty Waterflower wrote: "You already did!"
Gary MF Oak, Dawn Matthews, May Maple liked this comment.
Ashton B. Ketchum wrote: "What moment?"
Brock Harrison wrote: "The moment where you admit your undying, wild, inappropriate love for our one Misty Waterflower. You've seen recent pictures of her, haven't you?"
Ashton B. Ketchum wrote: "Is this what you wanted me to make an account for?!"
Ashton B. Ketchum wrote: "Also, shut up!"
Brock Harrison wrote: "I don't see you denying it!"
Tracey Sketchit, Daisy Waterflower, May Maple, Dawn Matthews, and four others liked this comment.
Ash wasn't even sure what else to say to this; how ludicrous! Ash didn't exactly know what that word meant, but Misty used it when people would exclaim things that were incorrect, and clearly everyone was drinking, or high, or touched in the head! Ash didn't like Misty. Well, actually, of course he liked Misty, they were best friends; have been best friends for years—why did wanting to catch up automatically equal dating? This was the exact reason he never wanted to join this website!
More comments flooded, a few from his mother at work, but he ignored them in favor of one message from Misty.
Misty Waterflower: "I'll delete the comment, it's fine. Sorry about that lol." Why was she apologizing? Why was he so worked up!?
Ashton B. Ketchum: "Don't apologize, you didn't do anything wrong." ...but he was dying to know.
Ashton B. Ketchum: "Do you know anything about their weirdness though? You know, why they would say that stuff?"
Misty read the message immediately, but since the notifications stopped, he could only assume she was busy deleting the deliciously evil post that Brock ruined so casually.
Misty Waterflower: "Why did you want me to visit so badly?"
Ashton B. Ketchum: "Why did you answer a question with a question?"
Misty Waterflower: "Ash, don't try to be smooth. You're not smooth."
Ashton B. Ketchum: "I wasn't trying to be smooth. Well, maybe."
Misty Waterflower: "Ha. Why in the world?"
Ashton B. Ketchum: "You know, this is what's wrong with this whole website, I never know what anyone really means because its all text, and everyone is always in everyone's personal lives!"
Misty Waterflower: "Whoa! Ash, you have a private life...that you don't advertise? I would have never thought you of all people wouldn't want the extra attention."
Ashton B. Ketchum: "Well, it's not that. It's nice hearing from everyone, but, have you noticed, everything I do results in someone asking about my relationship status? It's weird."
Misty Waterflower: "...Well, you are about that age."
Misty Waterflower: "Besides, weren't you a little curious about everyone else?"
Ash thought back to his time spying on his friends pages, and pursed his lips guilty.
Ashton B. Ketchum: "...maybe."
Misty Waterflower: "See, it's a normal occurrence. At our age everyone is getting paired off, and everyone wants to know about it."
Ashton B. Ketchum: "I don't really want people to know all that stuff lol." He didn't know was 'lol' meant, but Misty used it after a sudden notion, he could only assume it meant something along the lines of hopelessness, or something.
Ashton B. Ketchum: "I mean, you don't really post anything, either. Daisy just tags you in a lot of stuff and you comment a lot."
Misty Waterflower: "You're such a pokebook stalker. This coming from you is rich~ lol" What did that mean?
Ashton B. Ketchum: "What does that mean?"
Misty Waterflower: "It just means for someone who wants to stay so uncharacteristically 'private' you abuse the nature of the website." Still confused, Ash went on to ask what she meant, but she beat him to it.
Misty Waterflower: "C'mon, Ash. You like being kept in the loop."
Ashton B. Ketchum: "OK fine. I like to be in the loop. I only wish people would tell me in person, or something. It feels weird suddenly that I'm just supposed to know these things because it's plastered online. I tell people when something happens to me."
Misty Waterflower: "No you don't!"
Ashton B. Ketchum: "OK, but I tell my mom, and she tells everyone. It's pretty much the same thing."
Misty Waterflower: "And how do you think she tells everyone?" Ash stared at his smart-dex for a long time, watching her text wiggle at him in the darkness of his bedroom. Clemont's words came back to him Science is great, he never realized how connected everyone was before this, with something as small and insignificant as a glorified paperweight.
Misty Waterflower: "Anyways, that comment was deleted, so no more worries about people knowing your personal life or anything, I have to get back to the main floor. I'm sure Daisy is simply dying without me." Ash hesitated, biting his bottom lip.
Ashton B. Ketchum: "What about you?"
Misty Waterflower: "What about me?"
Ashton B. Ketchum: "Are you, you know, seeing someone?"
Misty Waterflower: "hahaha. I see lots of someones everyday, Ash." He groaned outwardly, fidgeting in his bed and gnawing like a rapid dog on his lower lip.
Misty Waterflower: "And you should already know, you stalked my page after all, didn't you?"
Ashton B. Ketchum: "I did not stalk your page!"
Misty Waterflower: "It's okay, I stalked you, too. ;)" A chill ran down every bone in his spine and he swallowed hard, a blush rising to his cheeks while he saw the little bubble indicating she was typing more, and waited anxiously.
Misty Waterflower: "Your 'about' section was soooo intricate. Full of lots of details about your personal life. I especially loved the default profile picture of pikachu that you picked. It's adorbs."
Ashton B. Ketchum: "I didn't know what to write. Besides, I'm deleting this after tonight, anyways. Brock said I only had to give it a try for a week, and if I didn't like it I could get rid of it."
Misty Waterflower: "You don't like it?"
Ashton B. Ketchum: "This place is not for me, Mist."
Misty Waterflower: "Why not? Lol, think about it, when was the last time we talked before this?" His eyebrows rose while he blinked at his smart-dex, that was a great question. He didn't remember. A year at least. He might have talked with her on the phone sometime between then, Brock tried to do group calls sometimes; but between Ash and Misty's schedules...
Ashton B. Ketchum: "But everyone is so nosy."
Misty Waterflower: "Then use it to just talk to me? People can't be nosy right now."
Misty Waterflower: "Err, you know, I mean everyone. Like talk to me and...everyone else."
A playful grin tugged at Ash's mouth while he leaned back.
Ashton B. Ketchum: "Tried that. Melody ruined it."
Misty Waterflower: "Melody's a gossip. She always has been—don't you remember"
Misty Waterflower: "Actually, never mind. But anyways, don't worry about her. You're just shiny and new. You'll get used to it."
Ashton B. Ketchum: "Will I? I dunno... I think I might need some convincing, Mist."
Misty Waterflower: "Don't you take that text with me!"
Ash snorted, rolling over to bury his head into his pillow. He felt so secretive, and weird, and burning up on the inside. It was a wonderfully catastrophic sensation that made him lick his lips in excitement.
Ashton B. Ketchum: "I'll tell you what! If you come visit, I'll keep the stupid account active. It won't do much though, I won't have signal outside of cities, and I spend most of my time in a forest."
She started typing once, for awhile. Ash watched the dots emerge, then disappear, then appear again, until finally:
Misty Waterflower: "Okay" Seemed to take her an awfully long time to write a four letter word!
Ashton B. Ketchum: "OK?"
Misty Waterflower: "I'll come visit." His heart flipped.
Ashton B. Ketchum: "Really? That's great! When can you be here?"
Misty Waterflower: "Well, if I take the train, a few hours?"
Ashton B. Ketchum: "Awesome, then I'll see you soon!"
Misty Waterflower: "..yea"
XOX
Misty Waterflower posted on your timeline:
Ash Ketchum and Misty Waterflower are in a relationship. Send them your thoughts?
"Thanks for helping me change my name. If I had someone else ask me about the B in my middle name, I was going to lose my mind." Ash mouthed into Misty's hair while she laid against his chest on the couch. She was pleasantly engrossed in her own smart-dex while Ash held his up as if it were a science experiment.
"Earth to Misty?" He peeked over her shoulder to see her phone screen, which she immediately ducked out of his line of sight.
"I think I'll delete my account." She said boldly, and Ash stared at her, flabbergasted.
"What? Like hell!"
"Have you read the comments yet?"
Ash paused. "...no."
Misty nodded, "Then give me your phone, you don't need to!"
"Read them? Why not?" Ash asked innocently, pursing his lips at her.
"Our friends have some serious issues!"
"Well I could have- What did they say?"
"Nothing!"
"It can't be that bad." He urged while clicking open the screen to the news feed announcement, following the notification prompts, and immediately clicking away.
"...So deleting accounts?"
"Yeah-huh." Misty nodded, "I think you were right. We should have told everyone in person."
"See, I told you social media was stupid!"
Misty rolled her eyes at him. "You sound like a dinosaur."
"You're older than me!"
Author's Note:
It's been too long. -dies inside- I haven't been able to write because I've been so busy, but, I've been trying to catch up the last couple of days; I hope I do well!
Anyways, AshPli requested a "facebook in pokemon" one-shot, and I wasn't sure what to write at first. I checked out "pokebook" by Levi Ackerman (Just Chapter 7, actually), annnnd I thought it was pretty funny! But It's not so much in my writing style, so I hope this did your request some justice?
I was going to originally have Ash accidentally confess in a public space, but then I was like "This whole story is cliché, I don't want to have a major cliché like that." I kind of copied Miss Levi Ackerman's format!
Dawn is that girl who uses emoticons and exclamation points FOR EVERYTHING. May is the one who only comments when she can talk about food or gloat. Brock is the mother hen. Gary is an ass. Misty is an internet Troll. Daisy is the fawning Sister. Melody is a nosy individual. Paul never comments, but he chronically likes things.
Some people believe Ash's writing would be atrocious, and while I think he's dense, I don't think he's dumb as far as writing goes. Have you seen the episodes where he draws? I think he would be competent enough to string together a few sentences easily enough.
I have quite a few Mad Season chapters damn near complete, including several older requests; I've just been iffy on updating them for some reason! I don't know what's wrong with me! So, I've decided I'm just going to update whatever since I think everything I'm writing has been bad lately, we can all suffer together? (laughs hysterically and dies)