Hey all! Once again I am running away from responsibility, because who needs to study for midterms...=D Before we dive into the chapter, I just had a few things to say first.

1. This is the first chapter that really happens around the same time that Spike and Buffy started their...thing. You'll notice that I don't mention any romance at all between them, but I also don't make it obvious they haven't. Instead of sleeping with him, Buffy mentions that she's been drinking with Spike a lot. Really, it's up to you, the reader, if they're hooking up or not. It makes no real difference to the plot. Personally I feel as though they are not sleeping together, mostly because Dean is helping her to cope and feel human in the same way that Spike was doing. I am a die-hard Spuffy fan, but for this story I feel like it makes sense to leave that out. Again, up to you though!

2. Your reviews have not gone unnoticed. I really wish there was a way to reply to reviews other than PMing people. Sigh. I appreciate all the love I've gotten from you guys, and it's the motivation to get these chapters done even when I'm knee-deep in textbooks.

Backgammon - I feel ya! Having Dean all demony has been really cool, but a stark contrast to the character that I'm writing! HE CALLED THE IMPALA JUST A CAR AND I NEARLY DIED. At least things are getting back to normal now!

HolyCowsAndFlyingPigs - Great username, by the way. Really aces aha. I'm glad the slower pace is working for people! I was nervous that people would feel like it was too drawn out, but I really did want to make it feel more realistic. Especially since Buffy has learned more than once to take her time with diving in with boys and such. Don't worry, there's some ass-kicking coming, and once this installment is done, the third part is ALL ass-kicking and romance =D I promise. Awe thank you my dear! I guess the more you love a character the more you drag 'em through the mud, eh? Like these shows need more drama...but I thought it was a fun twist. Thank you so much for your words! It means literally the world to me!

Jada - Awe I'm so glad you're enjoying it! There are plans for her memories, and I think you'll all like what I'm doing with it. Buffy was in Purgatory much longer than Dean, but time passed differently there for sure. I kinda figured that it made sense to be similar to Hell in a way. Buffy would have been there about 5 months (if you take Spike's word on her being gone for 147 days), so I figured that translated into a whole shit ton of years, haha. Dean was there for only two months or so, so he was there less than half the time Buffy was. He mentions the "lifetime" because it was quite a long time, but also because it felt like so much longer thanks to the exhaustion and the constant battles. That was kinda my thing. I didn't comment too much because I didn't want to lock myself into a timeline too soon, and I wanted to give you guys the ability to decide for yourselves a bit =)

Alright, with all that out of the way, on to the chapter!

Chapter Seven – Hole In My Soul

"Wait, wait. Say that again?" Dean was laughing wholeheartedly.

Buffy was choking back tears as she laughed, "oh you heard me. An-and Xander! God, he almost had to become his Queen!"

Another fit of laughter struck the two of them. The image of Buffy doing show tunes was already too much, but picturing that shaggy haired boy becoming a Queen? That took the image far into the realm of ridiculous. Buffy, who had lived through it, knew that it wasn't quite as light and fun as she had made it sound, but laughing was the only way she could cope with the whole ordeal right now. If he had picked up on her using laughter as a cover, he didn't let on at all. Which suited her just fine. There had been enough doom and gloom lately, and she figured that a little laughter would be a nice change of pace.

Dean had been worried that their last phone call had left Buffy in a darker place than she had already been. A lot had been said on both sides. They had both revealed a lot about where they were coming from, and he wasn't entirely sure that he had helped in any way. With everything that had been let out into the open, Dean had felt better than he had in a long time. Buffy, on the other hand, was hard to read. It was a real concern that admitting to him that she had been ripped out of heaven would have pulled her further into the darkness. Instead of giving her some sort of relief it could have made it all the more real for her. The laughter he was hearing from her now was nothing but relief. She wasn't 'all better' like she wanted to pretend, that Dean knew, but she wasn't wearing her secret like armour anymore. At least not with him.

He never thought he'd be happy that a demon blew through a town, but if a few songs and dance were enough to lessen her burden, then so be it. That being said, Dean would definitely prefer never coming in contact with a demon of that nature. The thought was shudder inducing. If there was anything that Dean didn't do it was dance. Or sing show tunes, and it didn't seem like Sunnydale had been belting out any Zeppelin or Blue Oyster Cult. The last thing that Dean wanted to see, and maybe this was higher on the list than his own singing and dancing, was his lumberjack brother dancing around him. Yeah, he could go his whole life without seeing that and not feel like he was missing out on anything. Plus Dean was sure that this demon wasn't as benign as it was sounding at this point; something was definitely up.

"Okay. I'm a little lost here, so let's see if I got this right. A demon came through town, summoned by some necklace or something, and made everyone sing and dance whatever it was they were thinking? Like a truth serum in musical form?"

"Yup, that's what happened. A few dance routines, songs about mustard and secrets," Buffy replied.

"And that's it? It just wanted to see your town singin' and dancin'? No ulterior motives?" Dean pressed.

"Well, it started out kinda fun. I mean, Giles and Will were both worried at the first glimpse of it all, but it all seemed pretty harmless. Soon there were people dying of what seemed like spontaneous combustion. That was kinda a downer."

"Aaaand the few ruin it for the many. Isn't that always the way?" Dean joked. "How'd that happen?"

Bingo. There it was. All his years in the hunting business had taught Dean well enough by now that demon's didn't do harmless. They didn't know how. Burning people to death after pulling the truth out of them? Pretty shitty, even for a demon.

"Well, it'd get a little intense. The dancing would take over and next thing you know, they couldn't stop, even once the smoke started to rise. Fire would consume them."

"There was no pain. No fear, no doubt, till they pulled me out of Heaven. So that's my refrain, I live in Hell 'cause I've been expelled from Heaven. I think I was in Heaven. So give me something to sing about. Please give me something..."

Her confession had been playing in her head like a broken record ever since it happened. She never wanted to hurt her friends, they had only ever wanted what was best for her. Except that they did what was best for them, not necessarily for her. Buffy knew her friends thought they were saving her, but that was a cold comfort when she thought back to all that she had lost. Telling her friends had never been part of her plan, but that demon had found that secret and ripped it right out of her. It took pleasure in the pain it caused her friends, that it caused her, and then it almost killed her. She could still remember how hot her feet had become; how close she had come to burning.

"So what'd you sing, Buffy?" Dean's voice came out smooth, almost in a flirty tone. "Did the demon help you reveal your love for me?" Buffy could practically hear the wink in his voice.

"Oh ya know, about theories and saving Dawn."

"Not me then?" Dean said in mock sadness.

"Sorry Dean, I guess it was more focused on drawing attention to misery than tainting joy," Buffy shrugged.

"Well I guess that's okay then," Dean smirked.

He wasn't sure, but it sure sounded like Buffy just told him that he was the good in her life. Or at least one part of it. Dean would take that as a check in the "win" column any day. He was part of what made her happy, and right now that's all he wanted.

Buffy's voice pierced through his thoughts, coming out smaller than it had before, "it knew about heaven."

Dean's eyes went wide immediately, her words wiping away any of the residual warm feelings he'd had. A quick panic washed over him as he thought about what she had said. Buffy had said that the demon focused on misery, and what could have been more miserable than finding out you had never made it to heaven? That you had spent what felt like a lifetime fighting for your life in Purgatory? That someone you had come to trust was part of the charade that made you believe you had been torn out of heaven? Did this demon see all of this? Were the lies broken down now? Did she know he lied?

He swallowed hard before speaking, trying to wet his dry throat, "knew about it?"

"Or at least that I was lying about it, about being there. Now my friends know too. It made me admit that I was in heaven."

Despite the remorse that lingered behind her words, Dean felt a great relief as she explained. He was surprised at how much relief he felt when she said what her secret had actually been. For someone who had been so against what Cas had chosen to do, Dean was not prepared to allow those fabricated memories to be cracked. Not by some demon, and not if it could cause her more pain.

"So you're friends know the truth then? At least you don't have to lie anymore," Dean suggested.

"You should have seen their faces, Dean. Willow was destroyed. I never wanted them to hurt like that," Buffy winced at the thought of the devastation that had crossed Willow's face, all of her friend's faces.

Dean's relief shifted to a dull ache. Cas had done this to her. It was the only thought he could focus on because it was the only part that he could do anything about. Not only had Cas caused a lot of Buffy's suffering, but now her friends were affected by what Cas had done. Her friends had saved her when no one else could, and now they were left feeling like they had fucked up. It probably broke their hearts to feel like they had ruined paradise for Buffy. They deserved to know that they had truly rescued her. They deserved to know the good they did, and Buffy should know what they had actually done. She should know that they really did save her from a fate worse than death.

ӁӁӁ

"You called me, Dean?" Cas asked, standing mere feet away from Dean.

"Ya I called you! I've been calling you for a week now," Dean tried, and failed, to keep his voice calm.

"I am sorry. I have been busy, there has been much to do. What is it that you need?"

"You need to fix this," Dean's voice shook with anger.

"I do not know what you refer to. Fix what?" Cas inquired, genuinely confused as to what he was doing here.

"Buffy! Those memories you gave her have done her no favours. She's cracking, man," Dean didn't know if he wanted to plead or to demand Cas to do something. "You're punishing her friends, too. They don't deserve that. They deserve the truth, and you know it."

"Do you think her remembering the horrible things she lived through would be any better? To know that after all the good she did in the world, she had been denied sanctuary?"

Dean had thought about that ever since he had heard Buffy say out loud that she had been in heaven. What pain was worse? Being ripped from heaven, or knowing that you had never made it there at all? There was no easy answer; each side had merit. It was thoughts like those that had disturbed his sleep almost as much as Buffy's laugh had done before. In all those nights he had come to one conclusion.

"It's not our choice to make, Cas. You didn't just mess with her mind, but her life, man."

Cas looked as though he was considering what Dean had said, "that may be true, but I didn't exactly have time to ask her opinion on the matter. Her transport was much quicker than I had anticipated, and I had to act before she returned to her physical body. I did the best I could. I could see what she had lived through in Purgatory, and was it not you who said that she deserved better than that?"

Dean opened his mouth to say something, but was quickly cut off by Cas continuing to speak.

"She was there for a lot longer than you, and she was alone, Dean. You have no idea what she faced, you were only present for a fraction of her time there. The damage done by Purgatory was unimaginable. She would not have resembled the Buffy that had existed before if I had left those memories intact. Those fabricated memories are holding her together. It is all that is holding her together."

Dean's anger was no longer driving his motivation, and he found himself quieted down now. He took a deep breath, "was it that bad?"

"Being alone nearly broke her, Dean. The battles she faced, the horrors she witnessed, it was all too much. She may be in pain now, but it is substantially better than what she would be dealing with otherwise. I am sorry, but this is the best I could do for her. I will not lower those walls," Cas narrowed his eyes as he spoke.

Cas had hoped that that would be the end of the disagreement, but there was still a fire behind Dean's eyes that he had yet to ebb. Though his argument had fallen silent, that fire showed no sign of diminishing and Cas knew the determination that was sure to be born from that. Cas sighed before he reached his hand out towards Dean. As Cas' finger set on his forehead, a sharp pain shot through Dean's skull. Suddenly images started to flash through his mind, first coming in scattered but then a coherent picture began to form.

A blonde surrounded by darkness. Buffy. Her arm was hanging limply to her side. She crashed through the twisted forest, darting between trees, nothing but a flash of blonde hair to betray her location. She was checking back over her shoulder as she ran, and there was a fear on her face that Dean had never seen before. A small brunette followed her, sauntering behind her with a playful grin on her face. Eve. As fast as Buffy could run, Eve was faster. She was practically floating through the woods now, closing in on Buffy without losing her breath. Suddenly Buffy was lifted from the ground, high above all the trees, where Eve unceremoniously dropped her straight down to the ground. The blonde hit the Earth with a fierce force, and did not move again.

A flash.

Night time had fallen, and Buffy was cowered in a corner of a cave with a small fire burning. Her knees were hugged up to her chest and there were lines through the grime on her cheeks; evidence that she had been crying. Every so often her head would start to slip downwards towards her knees, but she would realize that she was falling asleep and snap her head back up. Her eyes would grow wide and dart around to survey the scene around her. This Buffy did not resemble the woman he had fought with. She was small and frail. Her exhaustion was worn on her face as clearly as her fear. She continued to fight sleep until something broke through the cave's small opening. A large dark mass rushed at her, catching her off guard. Her scream was enough to break glass as everything went dark.

A flash.

Buffy was standing against a tree, her chest heaving as she struggled to catch her breath. She was doing her best to remain still. A shadow lurched past her and Buffy stifled any sound that had wanted to escape her lips. The shadow passed by again and seemed to stalk off in a different direction. Her shoulders slumped in relief as she slid down the tree gingerly to a seated position in the soil. Dean's vision followed her gaze down to her knee, where he could see the bone protruding through her flesh. She winced as she removed a thorn from the gaping wound and tossed it aside. Her head leaned back against the tree as she fought against the sobs that threatened to break to the surface. From behind the tree a claw shoved through the trunk, piercing through the blonde's stomach. A scream roared past her lips.

A flash.

It was dark. Still. A wave of flames splashed out from the center of the darkness in tendrils lighting numerous torches that lined the stone walls. Eve stood in the middle, looking intently across the space from her. Buffy was there, her hands chained to the cave's wall. She rattled her chains as she pulled on them, desperately trying to break free. With a flick of her hand, Eve halted Buffy's movements and pulled her gaze back to the brunette. With another flick of her hand Eve clawed at Buffy's flesh, ripping a few ribs free from their sockets. Buffy screamed in agony, sinking deeper into the chains. Dean could see the deep and bloody gashes in her wrists where the shackles had dug in. She had been here a long time. Eve cackled as blood erupted through Buffy's lips. The brunette's hand tightened again, doing unseen damage to the blonde as she cried out in pain.

A flash.

"What the hell was that!?" Dean gasped, coming back to the present time and struggled to stay on his feet.

Cas looked at him somberly, "a look at what your Slayer faced once you were no longer in Purgatory."

"Oh god…Cas…Eve…" Dean's words were failing him.

"Hunted her relentlessly. That is, until the witch pulled her out. This was only a glimpse of what she went through. There were a countless number of memories similar to these. Now do you understand my choice?"

Dean stayed silent. A million thoughts running through his head. He couldn't imagine what other horrors Buffy had seen. How much torture she had withstood. Dean knew what Hell was like, and he had felt firsthand the anger that Eve had harboured. He understand now just how bad Purgatory had been for the blonde Slayer. No matter how torn Buffy had been since she returned home, it was better than the alternative. He saw that now. She was strong, resourceful, a survivor, but no one could cope with what that world had done to her. Cas was right to step in, but that didn't help Buffy now. It certainly didn't help to quiet his own uncertainty or remorse.

"There's gotta be something we can do to help her. Please," Dean implored.

"I have done all I can. This is what is best."

"Can't you return the memories from before…"

"I will not alter a thing!" Cas bellowed before he disappeared from sight.

"Damnit!" Dean slammed his hands down on the trunk of his car.

"Maybe he's right, Dean," Sam came around the corner of the Impala.

Dean was startled by the sudden voice that pierced the silence and darkness around him. He had thought he'd been alone with Cas, and he had no idea how long Sam had been standing there.

"How much of that did you hear," Dean practically growled, avoiding eye contact.

"Enough," Sam searched his brother's face for any hint that he should abandon his current course of conversation. "I think he's right."

Dean's gaze flew to meet his brothers, "what!?"

"I don't know what happened in Purgatory. Not with you and not with her, but I know what it's done to you. You've been a mess since you got back, as much as you try to ignore it." Sam shrugged his shoulders, "if she can live without whatever nightmares you've been stuck with, it's probably for the best." Sam paused before he continued, "I'd do the same for you, if I could."

ӁӁӁ

'Goodbye to everything that I knew.
You were the one I loved,
The one thing that I tried to hold on to.
And it hurts to want
Everything and nothing at the same time.
I want what's yours and I,
Want what's mine...
I want you,
But I'm not giving in this time...'

ӁӁӁ

"C'mon, c'mon, pick up," Dean anxiously pleaded with the ringing phone.

It had been well over a week since he had heard from Buffy last. She hadn't called him, and she hadn't picked up when he called her. Every time Dean could see Buffy at the mercy of Eve he had dialed his phone, as if hearing her voice would be enough to make him believe that those horrors were far behind her. It was as though he hoped talking to her would be enough to rid him of his guilt. It wasn't. It didn't matter though, she hadn't answered her phone yet, which made it even harder. When she didn't answer he started calling every chance he got. Normally his calls would be made only when Sam wasn't paying attention, but it got to the point that he didn't care if Sam was watching.

To begin with he had been repeatedly greeted by a very nice, albeit very annoying female voice letting him know that "the customer you are calling is currently unavailable at this time." He would patiently wait for the beep, leave a hopeful message for her, and hang up until the next time. Then each time he'd called since, that same overly cheery voice would tell him that "the mailbox you have reached is full." Dean's heart sank every single time. He hoped that she was just busy, that life was hectic for her right now. It was the only good explanation that he could think of. The other possibility was that something had happened. The idea that she could be…no, it was too much. She had to answer her phone.

"The mailbox you have reach is full. Goodbye."

"Damnit!" Dean threw his phone down on the seat next to him, startling Sam awake.

"What's happening!?" Sam looked around frantically.

"Nothing. Go back to sleep," Dean's tone of voice was flat, but there was a frustration lurking below it that Sam could hear.

"Still not answering?"

The growl that Dean replied with was enough to give Sam his answer. He had been watching his brother dial his phone several times a day for well over a week, but never being on the phone long. The first few days he left a message, each message becoming more frantic than the last. Now it was just a hang up, which told Sam that the voicemail was now full. That was never a good sign.

"I'm sure she's fine, Dean."

Silence rang back as Sam's answer.

"You wanna switch for a bit? You look like you could use some sleep," Sam offered.

Silence rang back again.

"Okay, well I'm just gonna go back to sleep then..."

Dean huffed back at him, which was more of answer than he had gotten since they had left Muncie, and substantially more since he had noticed that Dean had been reaching the voicemail every phone call he made. Giving up, Sam slumped back against the window. There was no sense in trying to talk to Dean when he was like this, and he may as well get some sleep before they reached the next hunt town. Sam had just started to doze back off when the phone started vibrating against the seat. He went to hand it to Dean, but Dean was fast to scoop the phone up.

"Buffy!?" Dean's voice was full of worry.

"Yeah, it's me," Buffy sounded distant and apologetic.

Dean let out a breath that he hadn't realized he had been holding since he picked up the phone. A voice meant she was alive. He didn't know anything more about it all, but she was alive. Right now that was all that mattered. Anything else they could deal with.

"Is everything okay? Are you okay?"

"Everything is fine. I'm fine. I am so sorry I haven't called you back. Things have been…ya know, chaotic doesn't seem to cover it."

Dean didn't even need to hear the strain her voice to know that there was something more to this story. She was struggling to hold it together right now, but she was quickly losing that battle. Dean could hear the hitch in her voice and he was already pulling over long before the word 'chaotic' came out of her mouth. Dean slid out of the car and took a few paces away from it, leaving Sam on his own.

"What's going on, Buffy?"

Buffy didn't even know where to begin. The "funny" amnesia? Giles leaving? Tara leaving? Willow turning Amy back from a rat? Willow getting out of control? Willow nearly killing Dawn? Nearly losing Dawn to social services? Turning invisible? The nerd herd? The bender she had been on with Spike the last few nights? So much had happened since their last phone call. When she thought back over the events that had happened it made her head spin.

No wonder it had been so long since she had picked up the phone. Everything would have been so much easier if she'd had Dean to talk to, but there just wasn't time for it. Part of being the slayer is never getting time for yourself, she thought bitterly. She had only been visible again for a few hours now. Dawn was still in a sling and pissed at her. Willow was still in withdrawal. Her head still ached from the last flask that she and Spike had finished. It was just too much.

"Buff?"

She shook out of her thoughts, "Sorry. Uh. I don't even know where to begin…"

"That bad?"

Buffy sighed, "well, I guess social services have caught wind that I'm totally screwing up as 'mom of the house.' Doesn't help that when they came to do a follow-up on the house Dawn was still in her sling."

Dean straightened his posture immediately, "what happened? Is Dawn okay?"

"Yeah, she's good. A fractured arm, nothing serious," Buffy figured a little lie was better than a total lie.

Dean sighed with relief, "you're the best thing for Dawn. Social services will see that. Don't worry too much, okay?"

"Really trying. Really failing. Kinda in this alone right now, and it's pretty overwhelming."

"Alone? What about your friends? Uh, Xander, Willow, Giles, uh…Tara?" Dean paused before bitterly adding, "Spike?"

"Well, Xander is still buried in wedding world. Giles left, again. So did Tara. Spike is…well Spike. His version of help is a flask and poker." Buffy was starting to feel overwhelmed again, and even the thought of that flask made her head throb. "There's been a lot of turmoil lately."

Dean refused to admit that Spike's version of help was incredibly similar to his own. There was no way he had anything in common with a bloodsucker. Not even the look in the vamp's eyes when he mentioned Buffy. No way.

"Sounds like. Okay. What about Willow? The way you've talked about her I figured she'd be all over this Dawn situation," Dean continued to kick at the dirt at his feet, keeping his eyes on the Impala as he spoke.

"Willow?" Oh god this was a mess, she thought to herself. "She's uh…kind of…a bigger mess than me, actually."

"Geez, what's going on over there, Summers? Is she okay?"

Every time she had talked to Dean about Willow she could hear a strange tone in his voice. She wasn't sure what the exact source of it was, but she started to get the idea that it wasn't because Willow was gay. Buffy had this feeling that Dean had an issue with Willow practicing magic. She didn't really know why he had an issue with magic and witchcraft, and it was never anything he had admitted outright. People who didn't accept the existence of the supernatural world tended to be afraid of witches, but she had never met another hunter that carried a disdain for them. She had started to wonder if there had been a bad encounter with a witch in his life. Whatever the reason it was a sore spot that she didn't want to continuously hit on it. She didn't want to fight about it either. She'd defend Willow to the end of the Earth, definitely, but only if Dean made a disrespectful comment.

"She will be. She's working on it."

"What happened?"

"Just some…stuff."

"Magic stuff?"

Damnit. "Yeah. She got a little...carried away," Buffy was reluctant to share this with anyone, even Dean. "It got scary for a bit, but she's pulled herself back together now."

Buffy tried to put a positive spin on it, but she knew that there was no positive spin this time. Things were a mess and she had no ideas on how to fix it. It felt like there was nothing she could do. That feeling of helplessness seemed to be a pretty common occurrence lately, and she disliked it greatly.

"What's a little carried away?" Dean asked.

Buffy tried to explain, but it was nearly impossible to do so in a concise way. To tell the story she had to tell him about the fights that Willow and Tara had been having. She'd have to recount the spell gone wrong being the final straw. The story of Amy the Rat, now not so much a rat, would have to be explained. That was definitely not a good way to ease someone into being okay with witchcraft. If that wasn't all enough, the climax of the story would be the mess that Amy brought onto Willow. The partying was one thing, but the magic dealer was a whole new level of messed up. That was what caused Dawn's accident. Problem with magic or not, Buffy got the feeling that putting Dawn in danger would be a huge issue for Dean. It was a whole "protective older sibling" thing.

She spat the lengthy story out, trying to leave out the worst parts. The guilt was overwhelming as she let Dean in on Willow's most humiliating story. Willow would find it hard to forgive her for telling anyone this story, but Buffy couldn't help it. She had no one to talk to about it all, and that was all she had wanted. She could never explain how much she blamed herself for her friend's breakdown. Buffy spoke as quickly as she could, afraid that if she slowed down Dean would jump in with a cheeky comment. Much to her surprise he had stayed quiet, even after she finished recounting the horrible ordeal.

"My best friend was drowning, in nearly every sense of the word…and I didn't even notice. How awful is that? What a great protector I am…" Buffy said, a slight hitch in her words.

There was concern etched on Dean's face throughout the phone call. Sam couldn't make out what was being said, but it was definitely nothing good. Dean had been quiet for quite some time, but the expressions on his face told a bigger story than any words Sam may have been able to hear. Something big had gone down, and it was obviously big enough to shake even Dean. He watched silently as Dean slipped his phone back into his pocket and stormed back to the car. Not a word was spoken as he fired up the engine and tore off the shoulder of the highway. A fast U-Turn was pulled and they were heading back in the direction they had come.

"Dean?"

"Goin' to Sunnydale."

That was all Dean was ready to tell Sam. Buffy had told him a lot about Willow, about what she had been into since she had been brought back from the dead. Her powers had done nothing but grow over the years, but it was at a whole new level now by the sounds of it. She was into some stuff that made other witches, and even other creatures, nervous. Buffy had been hesitant to admit it, but it made her uneasy too. It was all overwhelming, and it was terrifying. Cas had assured him that Willow was not a threat, but with this new information, Dean couldn't help but doubt Cas' judgement on the matter. Cas did sometimes fail to comprehend situations for what they really were. Dean didn't know what he thought he was going to accomplish, tearing into town like this, but that didn't matter. He had to be there. Even if he couldn't help, he needed to be there. She needed him to be there.

ӁӁӁ

The brothers were closing in on Sunnydale by the next morning. They must have been about four hours out when Dean's other, other cell phone started ringing. Sam reached for it, but Dean's hand darted out faster and snatched it up before Sam could even place his fingers on the cell. Obviously he hoped it was Buffy again.

"Buffy?"

"Dean?"

Dean's brow furrowed as confusion crossed his face, "Garth?"

"Yeah, it's Garth! How are ya, Dean?" Garth smiled through the phone.

"Uh, good. Why are you calling me?"

"There's a big case that's come up. You need to head to New Mexico," Garth stated with a level of authority in his voice that Dean was not used to hearing.

Sam gave Dean a weird look, and Dean pulled the phone away from his face.

"It's Garth. Says he's got a case we gotta check out," Dean returned to the phone, "sorry man, we're busy. And since when do we take cases from you?"

"I uh, kinda took over for Bobby. I've been keepin' up with all the hunters he knew."

"Took over for – what the hell?"

Garth sighed, "someone had to do it, Dean."

"Are you fucking kidding me? You can't just -"

Sam grabbed the phone from Dean before his anger boiled over, "hey, it's Sam. What's going on?"

Garth smiled through the phone, "Sam! It's good to hear your voice." The authority returned to Garth's voice, "I have a confirmed sighting of a Suvolte demon in New Mexico. It's been jumping town to town and it's left behind a string of about 20 dead so far."

Sam looked over at Dean, remembering the look on his face when he announced they were going to Sunnydale. "No one else can check it out?"

"Do you know anyone else that can handle a Suvolte?" Garth questioned.

Sam paused before answering, "I'm on it."

Sam hung up and tossed the phone back down on the seat.

"You're on it?" Dean practically growled.

"Yes. Me. Drop me off in the next town. I'll bus it to the location and we can meet up after."

"What's the case?"

"Suvolte. Guess it's got a dead count of about 20 so far."

Dean slammed on the brakes, bringing the Impala to an abrupt stop and nearly sending Sam through the windshield as it spat gravel and dust up behind it. It was a good thing that there had been no one behind them.

"A what!? And you think you're going alone?"

Sam shrugged, "you were pretty adamant that you were needed in Cali. I can handle this. You go do whatever it is that you need to do."

Dean spun the car around again and headed back in the direction they had come from, spitting up even more gravel as he spun his tires.

"Dean?"

His expression was sullen, but that didn't change Dean's decision. "You're not taking on a Suvolte alone."

Sam opened his mouth to argue, but was shut up by a quick glance from Dean.

"We'll clean it up, and head to SunnyD in a couple-a days."