Chapter Nineteen

He stood in front of the window watching the snow fall over the woods outside their home. She stirred on the bed and he looked at her smiling. She rolled over to face him and blinked the sleep out of her eyes, and just like every morning when she woke, she smiled when her eyes found his face.

"Good morning," He said coming over to kneel beside the bed.

She pulled herself over to the edge of the bed and leaned over to kiss him, "Good morning,"

Her lips brushed over his and he couldn't stop himself from putting a hand on the back of her head and deepening the kiss. Slowly, he pulled back to look at her.

"Did you sleep well?" He asked.

She smiled, sitting up in the big old bed, her large pregnant belly exposed from under their quilts. "Oh, fine, between this little one and Cassius and Mera, I think I got about a minutes peace."

He smiled, sitting on the edge of the bed beside her. Pregnancy suited her so well, she practically glowed but he did worry she wouldn't get enough rest, the memories, although always calm and happy, came fast and furious to them when she was with child.

Sabine looked up and met Jack's eyes, she must have seen the concern and smiled at him reaching over, placing her palm against his cheek, "I'm fine Jack. You will worry yourself into a state if you aren't careful."

He turned into her hand, kissing her palm, "That's why I need you. To make sure I look after myself."

The door banged open and they both turned to see the little girl with light brown curls toddle into the room, with shrieks of 'Mama! Papa!' She ran over to the bed and hit it with force, "Oh gently," Sabine said chuckling at their daughter's enthusiasm.

"Come to your Papa," Jack said standing up reaching for his daughter, she ran into his hands without hesitation and he lifted her from the ground and tossed her into the air, her giggles filled their bedroom, her little cotton nightgown fluttering in the air. He caught her effortlessly and held her close to his chest. "Will you help Papa fix breakfast for your mother."

She smiled, showing her tiny baby teeth that were starting to wiggle, "Yes," She said a slightly lisp on her S.

"Good," He kissed her on the forehead. He looked down at Sabine who was smiling up at him and their daughter. "Do you need anything?" He asked her.

She shook her head, a hand resting on her belly. "No, just you and Elizabeth," She smiled, "That's all."

He leaned down, Elizabeth squealing in his arms and the forward movement, wrapping her tiny arms tightly around his neck. He kissed his wife on her temple.

"Wait till I get the fire going before you get up."

She giggled at his protectiveness but she nodded. He walked through the bedroom door.

As Jack walked through the door, Pogue woke up back in his bed, in his dorm. Pogue took a deep breath. That was an easy one. He rubbed his fingers over his eyes and rolled on his side. 'Great,' He couldn't help but think as he read 4:37 on the digital screen. It was always just before his alarm was supposed to go off.

Grudgingly, he pushed himself up to sit on the edge of the bed, his feet on the cold wooden floor of the dorm room. He shook his head. Suddenly, Pogue tensed.

Pogue swallowed against his suddenly dry mouth as anxiety crawled up his back. He looked over at Caleb who was still out cold. Suddenly, he stood up. It was odd, he didn't know what he was doing but at the same time it was almost like muscle memory, like his body knew what was coming before he did.

Pogue crossed the room and opened the door and there Victoria was. Frozen, fist in midair, literally a second away from knocking on the door. Her dressing gown was thrown on, one shoulder down around her elbow. Her eyes were the size of dinner plates and as soon as Pogue opened the door almost before his eyes landed on her, he knew Victoria was upset and there she stood in her pink nightgown.

Their eyes met and for a second she just looked at him. He noticed her other hand was hovering in front of her now flat, normal, stomach. Pogue realized suddenly how entirely different this dream must have been for her, how exactly much more intense it must have been for her. "Vicky…" He didn't know what to say. Victoria took a deep wavering breath before stepping through the doorway to stand right in front of Pogue.

"Oh my god," She said staring up at him. "Oh my god Pogue they were- we were….I mean, the little girl…." She was shaking, "And my-" She looked down at her stomach as if double checking she hadn't just woken up nearly eight months pregnant.

"It's ok." He said. Pogue reached over her shoulder and pushed the door shut before firmly taking her arms in his hands. "You're fine. Back to reality." He found her gaze and held it, "It's ok,"

Caleb shifted in his bed. Pogue and Victoria both looked at him, but he simply rolled over in bed, grinding his teeth slightly, and stayed asleep.

Victoria took a deep breath and nodded, "Right, you're right. Just a dream, or memory or whatever." She seemed to take his words to heart.

Pogue nodded, "Yeah," He smiled, "Whatever. Come 'ere, sit down." Victoria nodded. Shrugging off her dressing gown, she slumped on to Pogue's bed. He swallowed, irritated by his body's reaction to seeing her like that, on his bed. Before she had left for London, seeing Victoria do that would have had no more reaction from him than if Pogue saw Tyler on his bed. But now… she was tied up with so many people in his mind. 'And who knows, she had been gone for two years… dreams or not she would have gotten your attention...at very least.' He thought honestly looking at her.

Victoria sat up looking back at him, "Are you ok?" She asked raising an eyebrow.

He shook his head, "Yeah. Fine." He quickly sat down beside her and leaned his back against the wall. Victoria did the same.

She looked at him, still looking shaken, "Have you had that dream before?" she asked.

Pogue nodded, "Yeah, twice."

Victoria leaned forward looking at him surprised, "Really?!"

Pogue nodded, "Why? What?" He looked into her big blue eyes.

Victoria just shook her head looking away from him at the form of her sleeping brother. "I dunno, I just can't believe you have been having these dreams and no body has known about them." She looked at Pogue. "It must have been hard."

He stared back into her eyes. He swallowed, looking at his hands, "I dunno. Just … got through it," He looked at Victoria and she still looked worried for him. He nudged her in the shoulder, "Nice to have someone who gets it though."

Victoria chuckled quietly, "Well," She took a deep breath, "I am glad I have you. I don't know what I would have done on my own."

Pogue watched, her hair falling in her face, "You woulda been fine, Victoria." He said honestly.

VIctoria didn't look at him and it seemed to be taking some effort, from the way her fingers were playing with his comforter. Pogue let her off the hook by looking away from her, at Caleb's still sleeping form.

"Who are Cassius and Mera? Have you… been… them yet?" Victoria stumbled over the wording of it.

Pogue shook his head, taking the change of subject without hesitation, "No," He looked at her, "Haven't been there yet."

"Huh," Victoria sat back, "Are they always short like that? I mean that one seemed way shorter than … the first night."

Pogue shrugged, ignoring her blush, "It changes," He looked at her, "Sometimes it just feels like a moment. Some times longer."

"What's the longest dream you've had?"

Pogue thought back, "The longest has been a whole day." Pogue felt his mind wander back to that night. He must have looked far away because next thing he knew Victoria had a hand on his arm.

"You ok?" She asked gently.

Pogue nodded, looking down at the mattress, unable to keep from smiling to himself. "Yeah fine." He shook his head.

"What happened?" He looked up at Victoria, "In the dream?" She prompted.

He looked at her. He could have lied and said nothing. It would have made life easier, but in that moment, looking in her eyes, Pogue realized he didn't want easier. He didn't need easier and obviously easier wasn't meant to be part of the equation. So he settled on the truth, "It was Jack, and it was the day Elizabeth learned to walk for the first time. It was like this perfect day. Sunny and warm and we just decided to take off for the day, so we did. You packed this picnic and we just took off into the woods with Elizabeth and found this beautiful spot by the lake. Next thing we know, she is just moving!" Victoria smiled at his words, "She was brilliant and she was walking way sooner than the Simm's kid who is like four months older than her too. Then you casually tell me your pregnant again and-" Pogue looked up at Victoria and suddenly realized it wasn't them, yet in so many ways it seemed like it was. "Uh," he stuttered shaking his head, "Sabine was pregnant and she told Jack. So yeah, pretty awesome day… for him."

They sat quietly together for a moment and Pogue felt like he had already ruined it. Victoria was probably totally creeped out now and wouldn't want to talk to him about the dreams anymore…

"You know," She said softly, "I don't think it would be so bad if we just talked about the dreams like it's us." Pogue looked up at her, "I mean, between us. I just don't think anybody else would get it but-" She met his eyes. "I think we do, I mean, I feel like it's me in the dreams," Pogue nodded, "And I mean I know it's a different name but it just… feels like you. So I think between us, it's ok."

Pogue nodded, "I would be ok with that."

Victoria smiled at him.

Pogue blinked. Had she always been this beautiful, this understanding? He leaned forward and opened his mouth to say something that he would most likely come to regret when Pogue and Caleb's alarms simultaneously went off.

Caleb suddenly sat up in bed. "Wassgoingon?" He slurred looking at the two of them sitting on top of Pogue's bed, he blinked his eyes rubbing a hand over his face, "Victoria?" He swung his legs over the side of his bed. "Everything ok?"

Victoria nodded. "Oh yeah, par for the course, now I guess."

Caleb really opened his eyes, "What? Did you have another dream or memory or whatever?"

"Yeah," She said. "Still adjusting," Caleb nodded.

He got up stretching. Pogue shifted away from Victoria slightly, seeming to realise just how closely they were sitting to each other. Caleb wandered into the bathroom, saying over his shoulder, "You can crash in my bed if you don't wanna go back downstairs."

"Thanks," Victoria called before he closed the door. She looked at Pogue, "Swim?"

He nodded, "State's coming up,"

She gave him a half smile, "Seems kinda odd doesn't it? Life, just keeps on keeping on…"

Pogue nodded, "Yeah, it does."

Victoria didn't make a move to switch beds but Pogue didn't really care. He got up and grabbed his sweat pants from the floor also seeming to realise for the first time he was just in a pair of loose boxers. As if realizing the same thing Victoria looked away as Pogue pulled the sweat pants up and she reached for her house coat and quickly put it on. It was weird, the more normal things got the more Pogue was reminded of what was his life, but when it was just him and Victoria in a quiet moment, it all sort of blended together. He felt comfortable with her in every way.

"Pogue?" He turned and looked at her.

"Yeah?"

"How many … of us have you seen?"

"Uh just the two, but mainly Jack and Sabine."

"Who were the others?"

"Anne and Henry."

"Did they have children?"

Pogue nodded, "Yeah, a son. George."

Victoria nodded. She looked up at him again, "Do the kids always look the same?"

Pogue shook his head, "No, they have been different."

Victoria nodded. "Thanks,"

"Anytime, Victoria." Pogue grabbed his bathroom bag and walked out into the hallway.

Victoria sat quietly on Pogue's bed, plucking at the comforter. She looked over at her brothers bed. She took a deep breath before making a snap judgement and slumping down onto Pogue's bed. She felt exhausted.

She could smell him. On the pillow. It was funny, it was so familiar. The after shave was a new smell but other than that, it was him. Sure she had known Pogue her whole life but this, this was different this was deeper. She hadn't ever felt like this before, this level of being drawn to someone, this level of needing someone.

Victoria aggressively pushed herself off his bed and threw herself down onto Caleb's bed. The smell of her brother relaxed her, Victoria rolled her shoulders back and tried to empty her mind. She tried to remind herself that she wasn't supposed to be drawn to Pogue, she didn't need him. It became like a hollow mantra in her mind. As she counted her breaths Victoria slowly drifted into a dreamless, yet still restless sleep.