A/N: This chapter has descriptions in it about a miscarriage that younger readers may find upsetting and that older readers may find triggering. Although detail is not described, I just thought I'd warn you guys.

Gwen's POV.

Drip. Drip. Drip.

Blood.

No close your eyes.

Don't look up.

I look up. Blood splatters onto my face. It's warm. I back away and slam into a wall. But it's not a wall. It's a person. They grab me round the stomach and squeeze. I can't breathe because of the hardness of their grasp. I panic and kick backwards, although they let go my breath is still gone, my stomach still tight. The pain is unbearable it emanates from all around my back and ribs and stomach and legs. Agony. I clench over, screaming that someone will come. I am dying, dying, Dying! My face is pulled up by some unimaginable strength. A shadow leans towards me and jumps up into my face. I scream…

I sit up and clench my stomach.

"Arthur." I grab his shoulder with severe intensity "The baby's coming."

^.^

Merlin's POV

"What am I going to do Aithusa?" I say gently stroking their back.

They murmur a response, one I cannot understand.

"I'm obviously not going to kill Arthur. I mean it's ridiculous. I defied the prophecy before, I can defy it again."

Aithusa rubs their head against me. Then faces me. They blink slowly and bow their head. I return the gesture. A wave of affection runs through me. Aithusa doesn't belong to anyone, not Morgana, not me, not anyone, but the fact that they trust me and respect me is a huge accomplishment in itself. I sigh and lean against the dragon, its warm body compelling my weary eyes to close and go to sleep.

^.^

"Merlin, wake up." A voice says in a firm way. I startle up and shiver against the cold of the morning. How long was I asleep for? I pinch myself… definitely not dreaming. Standing in front of me is Gaius. He's in his leather apron, one he only wears when there is a battle on and his robes slow him down. I notice that it's covered in something reddish. Blood.

"Gaius? Are you okay?"

"I was going to ask you the same thing."

"I'll tell you later."

Gaius shifts uncomfortably. There's something wrong I know there is.

"Gaius, what's happened?"

"It's Gwen…" his eyes fill with tears. "She's…" then he whispers the last word as if he can't quite believe it, and neither can I.

Gwen.

Dead.

Gwen?

Dead?

Gwen.

Dead.

I pinch myself again, still not dreaming. That means it's true. That means she's actually- "B-b-but how?" I cry out battling against tears.

"The baby, it came early, during the birth, she collapsed. I couldn't save her. I" he breaks down. In all my years I have never seen Gaius cry, I embrace him and find myself crying as well.

I can't ask the next question. But I find myself saying "What about the baby?"

Gaius recomposes himself a bit "It's sixteen weeks premature. We've kept it warm near the fire but…"

"I need to see Arthur."

"He's in a bit of a state"

"I can imagine." I turn to go.

"Merlin."

"Yeah."

"Just remember that grief does strange things to people."

^.^

"Arthur?" I ask cautiously once I've put my head through the door. The place seems… orderly. I can't believe that Gwen is no longer here. She was so full of life. Her absence will be felt. It's also made me realise that I need to stop holding things out against Arthur. I need to make up with him. I hate fighting with him, not speaking to him and I need to do something about it before I do actually kill him. Not that I ever would, but still. I don't care anymore whether magic gets returned to the kingdom or not, all I want is my friend back. The room is empty as far as I can see. I look across to the fireplace and see a bundle of cloth near it. The maids must have come and cleared up the blood, because I can't see any. I walk over to the bundle where a tiny, tiny baby lays. It looks very frightened and poorly. I wonder why no-one is here protecting it. Then it occurs to me that this baby isn't going to survive. It was born too early. I don't know what compels me to do it. But I pick up the baby. The cloth swamps it and I slightly pull it back to see the face of it. I want to save it, I realise. I want to save Arthurs baby. I wasn't there to save Gwen. I should have been there. "I'm sorry Gwen." I say knowing as if she might be there. "I'm sorry about everything, about all that has happened, about not telling you about my magic, I'm sorry." But if Gwen is there, she remains silent. I glance at the baby, even with its eyes closed I can see Gwen on the face.

I know what I need to do. I need to keep this baby alive. I need to. For Gwen. For Arthur.

I lay the baby and swamp of cloth carefully in my arms and move out of the door. There doesn't seem to be anyone about and I wonder where Arthur is. How on earth did he leave his baby behind? But then I remember what Gaius said "grief does strange things to people."

I go into my own chamber and lay the baby on the bench where Gaius checks all his patients. I run into my room and grab the spell book, still kept hidden under the floor boards, even though there isn't really a reason to anymore. I use my magic to scan through the pages looking for the right spell. But the book closes again, not knowing the answer itself. I scream in frustration. And touch my eyes finding tears on them.

"Merlin." I gulp as I look up. Arthur is standing in the doorway. I pinch myself. Not a dream.

"Arthur, I'm so-"

"You weren't there."

"I know, I'm so sorry."

"Where the hell were you?"

"In the stables."

"Why?"

If the truth is going to come out at all, it's going to come out now.

"Looking after Aithusa… Morgana's dragon."

"What?!"

"I was-"

"No I heard you. But you mean to tell me that you were helping Morgana's dragon instead of being with me and Gwen when she needed you! How dare you, How dare you!"

"It wasn't like that,"

"No, so what was it like."

"Arthur." I begin. He's come closer and I've taken a step forward as well so that we're almost nose to nose. lying inbetween us is the baby. I look closer.

"Is that Althea?!" he sounds enraged and picks the baby up quickly as if I am about to attack it. "Why did you bring her here."

"I was going to help…" my voice trails off as Arthur notices the spell book.

"You were going to use magic on my daughter."

"I was trying to help…" I say again.

"You can help by leaving and never returning to Camelot."

"You don't mean that."

"Yes I do, get out! just get out! I never want to see you again. you've been nothing but trouble since you arrived."

I don't move. "Arthur I know you're hurting over Gwen and I know I wasn't there, I'm sorry truly I am."

"I DON'T WANT TO HEAR IT!"

He places Althea down and picks up his sword and raises it high in the air.

I dodge his blow, he doesn't have the attack within him as much as he did. Even though he trained all day everyday when he got back, his body strength isn't what it was. He notices that his swing missed and that seems to enrage him even more. he chases me round the table and I run and dodge and turn. I can't do anything to protect myself. my foot gets caught on the edge of the chair and I stumble into the table. He uses this to his advantage and pins me down with his arm. His whole body seems to resonate with anger.

That's when the swaddle of cloth catches my eye.

That's when I notice.

"Arthur?" but he's not listening.

"ARTHUR!" I try again. He snaps out of his rage momentarily and lowers his sword, clearly sensing my urgency.

"What?"

"It's Althea."

"What about Althea." and he turns to look.

"She's not breathing…"