Chapter 3

Have you not worked it out yet?

I cursed her that way, because there is no such thing.

(Malificent)

I let go of the blanket between my teeth and breathe heavily for a couple of minutes until my heartbeat returns to a normal rhythm. It's like I don't have a single bone left in my body. If I had to stand up now, I probably couldn't.

My eyes move to the candlelight reflecting on the room's ceiling. How can a flame be purple?

I blew gently into the candle light. Instead of extinguishing the color of the flame turns a bright white. I concentrate so hard that my temples start throbbing. My magic manages to blow out the candle but its smell stays inside the room long after.

It's sweet like the bathing oil I poured into the queen's bath tonight. I breathe in and the candle lights up again.

What is going on here? Normally I have this little trick way better under control. I raise an eyebrow and blow the light out again with so much force that the top part of the candle splashes all over the room.

Then I turn to my left side, so I'm facing the wall. I force my eyes to stay shut.

For the first time in my life I'm truly alone. The feeling of loneliness fills my heart and I start crying. I'm angry. I'm so angry at my parents because they came up with this ridiculous idea of a wedding.

They should know better. True love is nothing that happens in arranged marriages. So, why were they so keen on marrying me off on my birthday?

xxx

The next day I'm woken up early and being sent downstairs to the kitchen to get breakfast for the queen. A friendly soul pours me a cup of oatmeal that I gorge down standing up. The cook laughs and hands me a round shaped red fruit.

I turn it around between my hands. I lift it to my nose to smell it. The scent is lovely.

"What kind of fruit is that?"

She stares at me as in disbelief, shaking her head from left to right.

"You've never seen an apple before? What place do you come from?"

I feel like the fruit suddenly becomes hot in my palm. It drops to the floor. A wave of nausea hits me with so much force I have to hold on to the table next to me.

"Why do you have apples here?"

I remember the stories my mother used to tell me at bed time when I was a little girl. How Regina, the evil queen poisoned her with such a fruit. How my father managed to save her from the sleeping curse with true love's kiss.

She developed such a big dislike for the fruit that after I was born all the apple trees in our kingdom were set on fire and destroyed. We have bushes with berries and trees with pears and cherries. But I've never seen an apple in my entire life.

How can people here dare to eat them? Don't they know what can happen? A sleeping curse is one of the most horrible curses you can fall under.

You'll be forever locked up in a nightmare of never-ending fire.

"You need to hurry up, girl." The cook tells me. She hands me a heavy tray filled with bread and butter. There is jam, honey and thick slices of bacon. The cook places another apple from a basket on the tray. "Go now. Our queen is always hungry after her morning rides."

The tray is so heavy that I don't manage to knock before entering the queen's chambers. She's standing in front of a huge silver-framed mirror. It looks like she's talking to her image. What a strange thing to do.

I clear my throat.

"Good morning, your majesty."

She turns around. Purple smoke comes out of the sides of the mirror but vanishes within seconds.

"I was afraid I would have to go without breakfast this morning. Place the tray on my desk."

She points at it and follows me with loud clicking steps. I pour some tea into a delicate porcelain cup for her.

"Did you sleep well, Swan?"

I nod my head. "I slept like I was dead. Thank you, your majesty."

I watch her eat with an astonishing appetite. A bit of honey trickles down her jaw. My instinct is to lean forward and lick it off. I desire her. Maybe I can manage to suffocate the feeling if I remind myself often enough that she's dangerous.

"You told me, you know how to read, haven't you?"

"Yes, your majesty."

"That's going to be very helpful. You're going to assist me while I work on some of my potions."

She's going to practice magic in front of me? A wave of excitement makes my heart hammer faster.

"You're only going to read the instructions in my books to me, so I have both hands free. Don't touch anything. It could bring your end before time."

I have no desire to die. My heart is curious though to watch the queen practice magic. The only kind of magic I've come along so far is fairy magic. I'm sure hers will be very different from that.

"Do you understand me, Swan?"

"Yes, your majesty. I won't touch anything. I promise."

She grabs the apple from the tray. Then, to my horror, she tosses the damn thing at me. Automatically, I lift my right hand and manage to catch it.

"I don't like apples."

The queen laughs.

"I happen to find them quite savory. You still look a bit pale though. A bit of fruit will make you rosy-cheeked again."

I stare down at the red fruit in my hand. I lift it up and smell. How would something poisoned smell like? Would it be foul scented?

"Is something wrong, girl?"

I don't know what to tell her. I can't ask if that apple could be poisonous. I don't want to offend her.

"Don't you like apples, Swan?"

"I don't know.To be honest, I never tried one before. We don't have them in the kingdom I come from."

The queen licks her lips. She gets up from her armchair and steps towards me. My fingers quiver when she takes the apple from my hand.

She lifts it to her nose and smells. Then she presses her closed mouth against it.

"Apples are considered a forbidden fruit in your joke of a kingdom, aren't they?"

She turns the apple around and takes a small bite out of it. I wait for her to fall down to the floor in mortal agony. It doesn't happen. She chews and swallows. A smile washes over her face.

"See, there's nothing to be afraid of. Tell me, Swan, are you brave enough to taste a forbidden fruit? It's most delicious."

The queen holds the apple up to me. I lean forward. My mouth opens to take a bite out of the dangerous fruit. The peel is hard, underneath though the fruit is juicy. The taste is sweet but slightly tart. I chew and moan while the aroma fills my mouth.

"Good isn't it?" The queen asks. She places the fruit back into my hands. I eat it greedily. It's like I'm getting hungrier the more I eat of this. My tongue wipes over the spot where the queen's teeth have left a mark in the fruit.

"It's delicious indeed." I say, unable to stop chewing with my mouth half open. "I've never tasted anything alike."

xxx

The room next to the queen's private chambers is a mystery to me. It's dark because thick curtains are covering the window from letting any daylight in. There are torches burning on the walls. Between them are several shelves filled with herbs and little bottles holding all kind of colored liquids.

I cross my hands behind my back to suppress the urge to take something into my hands to take a closer look at it.

"Remember, Swan, don't touch anything. It could accidentally turn you into a toad."

My knees bend down into a curtsy while I eagerly nod my head.

"Good. Then, let's get started. See the book with the red cover in the top of the shelf there. Get it and open up on page 144. Read slowly, while I'm mixing the ingredients together."

The requested book is covered in dust. I blow over it and open the desired page. It reminds me a bit of a cooking book. Only that some of the ingredients are making my stomach cramp.

"Take a phial of red wine and mix it with double the amount of dragon blood."

I raise an eyebrow in surprise. Dragon blood? Where would anyone get the blood of a dragon without losing his life?

"Where did you get the dragon blood, your majesty?"

"Simple. I promised the dragon something in return and she willingly gave me a phial."

"You understand the language of the dragons? What did the dragon ask for?"

The queen stirs a thickly blue liquid into the crimson wine and it starts smoking slightly.

"A fertility potion,"

She stirs around in the now purplish liquid and smiles. "Motherhood is really important to some people. Do you wish to be a mother, Swan?"

I shrug my shoulders. "I don't know yet, your majesty. I don't wish to take a husband and without one it's impossible."

Her mouth smiles.

"What's the next ingredient?"

I clear my throat.

"Drizzle the dried leaf of an oak tree into the liquid and let it absorb."

She crumbles the brown leaf between her long fingers and slowly drops it into the mixture.

"Was the man your parents picked out for you old?"

"No, your majesty, I don't think so."

"Is he ugly? Does he happen to be crippled?"

I shake my head. I don't know much about the prince my father choose to be worthy my hand in marriage. He's from a big family and a faraway land.

"Why didn't you want to marry him?"

"I don't love him."

The queen blows gently and the fire underneath the potion turns into a bright green.

"Love like many things in this world is overrated. It's better you learn that lesson fast in life."

I think of my parents and how devoted they are to each other. I touch the ring in the pocket of my dress. Love is not overrated. Love is everything. The queen doesn't understand that because she's never had love in her life. For the first time I feel a bit sad for her.

"What's next on the list?" she asks impatiently.

I stick my nose back into the book again.

"Uhm…blend everything together. Add the breath of a virgin's first kiss and stir thoroughly."

My eyes narrow. What is this supposed to mean? How can you catch a person's breathe?

The queen clicks her tongue. She looks displeased.

"I don't think I have any left bottled up. Now, let me think…"

She walks around me and looks me over. It always makes my heart freeze in my chest when she's staring at me in this judging way. It is not like it's my fault the ingredient is missing in her supply. In what kind of markets do you find magical ingredients anyway?

"Are you untouched, Swan?"

My face turns red. There is no way, she can know that I touched myself last night, can she? Is it possible I was unknowingly so loud she could hear my moans?

"Are you mute now? Answer my question. I don't have all day to wait."

I nod my head. "Yes, your majesty. No man has ever touched me. I'm a virgin."

She smiles satisfied. "Perfect. Then it will work just fine. Give me one of the empty glass bottles from over there."

I hand it to her and she pulls out the cork.

"Now, come here, Swan. Moisten your lips with your tongue and part your mouth a bit."

"Why, your majesty?"

"I need a virgin's kiss breathe and you're here. Don't be frightened. You should be grateful your first kiss isn't going to be with some sweaty bumpkin."

I close my eyes. Automatically the tip of my tongue swipes over my bottom lip. I exhale slowly, parting my mouth.

Then, her hand is on my hip, holding me close. Her lips are against mine. They are warm and very soft. She presses them a bit firmer against my mouth. My heart is racing. My head is spinning.

I can feel her tongue sliding gently over my upper lip before it enters my mouth. I quiver when it touches the tip of my own tongue. Between my legs, I'm pulsing.

She pulls back and I exhale in a strange, unknown frustration. I open my eyes and blink.

The glass bottle is held up against my mouth. My breathe turns into a light blue sparkle that is pulled into the bottle. The queen closes it up real quickly and shakes it between her hands.

"Perfect,"

My mouth is glowing. She has kissed me on the lips. Her tongue was against mine. I can feel my knees turning weak.

I watch her stir the blue sparkle into the potion. It sizzles and fumes. Then, the liquid turns dry and leaves nothing behind then a little black pearl. I wonder what it is used for.

The queen touches the side of her mouth with her fingertip. Is it the bad light in here or do her cheeks look a little bit redder since she kissed me?

That night I dream of swans eating apples. Their feathers turn grey, then night black. I walk towards them with another apple in my hand, but it rots between my fingers before I reach the birds.