The next morning I woke later than the others and dressed before going to the kitchen. Tony, Bruce and Steve were sitting at the little coffee table by the window, Natasha was curled up in a puffy armchair talking to Clint who had a pile of cushions on the floor, and Bucky and Sam were at opposite ends of the couch. There was no sign of any Asgardians. "Where're Thor and the others?" I asked, walking in.
"They've gone to Asgard to speak with the secret rebellion," Natasha told me as I wandered over to the coffee table.
"Just to clarify; are you guys Avengers, or Jedi?" I inquired playfully. There were smiles and quiet laughs around the room, and Bucky scowled in confusion. "JARVIS, would you please be a dear and introduce Bucky to Star Wars for me?"
"Certainly, Miss Carter," JARVIS agreed, turning the television on and loading up the films. I leaned against the table next to Tony and looked him over. He looked rather haggard with raw, shadowed eyes and scruffy hair.
"Feeling better?" I asked. Tony nodded slowly.
"Yeah. Sure." He didn't sound convincing. He took hold of his coffee cup and lifted it before I plucked it from his grasp and sipped the dark liquid. It was coffee; but there was the unmistakable burn of some sort of sweet liqueur. I crinkled my nose, took the cup to the sink and spat, pouring the contents of the cup down the drain.
"Tony, how could you?" I complained, pouting. "After everything that happened last night…"
"What happened last night?" Clint asked.
"Never you mind," I snapped. I was pissed at Tony, but he was still one of my boys and I would keep his secrets. I turned my glare back on Tony and growled. "Stop it!" Tony sighed, eying me off wearily, propping his head up on his hand.
"I'm a grown man, Ellie. I can see to myself. I don't need you to make my choices for me. Go watch TV with Bucky," he drawled dismissively. I stared at him as I slowly stalked forward and slapped him across the face sharply. Turning on my heel, I swept from the room without acknowledging anyone; slamming the door behind myself.
I sighed, deflated, and leaned against the banister of the stairs that led up to the bedrooms. "JARVIS, you there?"
"Always, Miss Carter," came the gentle reply.
"May I ask you something?"
"Of course."
"Do you feel? Happiness, sadness, love; can you feel?" There was a pause before the AI replied.
"I do not know if I have the same sort of feeling as biological creatures, Miss; but yes. I do believe that I have the capability to process emotion, in my own way."
I was satisfied with that answer and smiled slightly before sighing again. "What do you think about Tony?"
"Mr Stark is troubled, Miss, and he does not appear to have the ability to cope with his emotional turmoil. I worry for him."
"As do I. My own observations lead me to agree with you most strongly," I concurred bitterly.
"Is there something you need of me, Miss?" I nodded, unsure if JARVIS could see or not, since I couldn't see any cameras.
"Yes. I would like you to observe Tony for me. Keep me updated on his condition. I believe that he has become self-destructive, and I would like to prevent him from doing any real damage to himself or the others, inadvertently or otherwise."
"I will, Miss… Mr Stark is fortunate to have you looking out for him." I smiled coyly, tucking a loose lock of hair behind my ear.
"Thank you, JARVIS. Hopefully, he'll grow to see that…" I sighed again and left the mansion. Standing on the doorstep, I took a deep breath, looked out over the wide fields, and ran. My hair bounced behind me and my heartbeat rushed in my ears as I pushed myself, throwing myself over fences, bolting through the tall grains until I stopped and flopped onto the ground, panting and staring up through the greenery to the wide silver sky over me.
As I lay there, breathing deeply, a misty drizzle started to fall and I closed my eyes, letting the moisture form a film on my skin, collecting on my eyelashes and in my hair. After a few moments, the drizzle got harder and the drops got bigger and heavier until it was pouring down and lightning cracked overhead, thunder booming through the air into the earth, thrumming through my body. I wondered idly if Thor was nearby as the cold seeped into my bones and my fingertips and nose turned numb. The rain bit my skin, stinging, but I stayed lying on the muddy ground anyway.
About an hour later, something brushed against my arm and I lifted a hand to wipe the rain from my eyes and opened them, looking up at Bucky sitting in the mud beside me. He met my gaze, as stern-faced as ever, but his eyes were soft and I smiled slightly and let my hand drop, closing my eyes again with a sigh. "Are the others looking too?" I asked quietly.
"No. I told them I'd find you; you needed space." I smiled again at Bucky's understanding.
"Thanks, Bucky." We fell silent again and stayed still until I started shivering.
"Come on," Bucky huffed, standing over me and holding out his hands. I took them and let him pull me up. Putting his right arm around my shoulders, Bucky guided me back to the mansion where the Avengers met us, frantic.
"Where have you been?" Steve demanded, cupping my arms in his hands and pulling me away from Bucky. "Look at you! You're freezing, and your all muddy! Go and have a hot shower; go."
"Yes, Mum," I said through chattering teeth, wrapping my arms around myself and heading upstairs to the bathroom. As I passed Tony, I met his gaze and he looked down guiltily, rubbing the back of his neck uncomfortably. I snorted and trotted up the stair, eager to get clean and warmed up. "Thanks for fetching me, Bucky," I called over my shoulder.
"Miss Carter." I jumped at the sudden voice in my bathroom, causing water to overflow from the bathtub and sighed.
"Yes, JARVIS."
"Forgive the intrusion, but you asked to be kept informed of Mr Stark's condition." I nodded, sitting up further in the bath.
"Yes, what news?"
"I have a scan from the Mark thirteen suit," JARVIS reported dutifully, and blue lights appeared from secret projectors in the room to form the scan of a human skeletal, digestive and respiratory system. I blinked.
"Is this Tony?" I breathed, mesmerised by the holograph.
"Yes, Miss."
"When is this from?" I demanded, reaching out to take the fingers, making the holograph move where I guided it.
"It is a live feed, Miss. Mr Stark is out flying now." I frowned, looking at the internal organs.
"Can you focus on something in particular?" I asked.
"Yes, Miss."
"Show me Tony's liver, please." The internal organs vanished to show Tony's liver inside his skeleton and I bit my lip in concern. "Does that look enlarged to you?" I asked nervously.
"Yes, Miss. Thirty percent larger than it should be, according to the scans."
"Is there any scarring?" There was a pause before JARVIS replied.
"Yes, Miss. There is some mild scar tissue through the liver."
"Early stage cirrhosis," I exhaled slowly, shaking my head as I narrowed my eyes at the scan. "Oh, Tony. Do you even know what you're doing to yourself?"