Disclaimer:I do not own Shingeki no Kyojin / Attack on Titan nor its characters.

"E-Eren… w-what…?"

"I love you, Mikasa Ackerman…" He mumbled, as even more tears flooded his eyes, and he didn't know why.

His voice was genuine, sincere… it didn't lack any honesty at all. That was his truth, his feelings. And goodness, Mikasa didn't know what to do, what to say… or how to feel.

On one hand, Mikasa felt odd flutters in her stomach, and she knew exactly what that feeling was. She recalled clearly what that feeling meant, her late mother once told her it was a feeling of nervousness, not because of something like giving a speech in front of millions, but rather because of someone. Someone whom she held very, very close to.

On the other hand… she felt unsure, conflicted… confused.

In the first place, Eren's words—despite being so simple— were just incomprehensible for the dear raven, whose heart was palpitating. It wasn't that she didn't feel the same towards him, it was just so… wow. However, her doubts came flooding into her fragile heart.

Firstly, Eren didn't exactly had the longest life to live, although that factor wasn't the main reason as to why Mikasa wouldn't express her love for him romantically, it was rather… she was just terrified. If she were to confess how she really felt, the brunette may be delighted to hear her response… but then, what happens after? They start dating, they start falling deeper into their ocean's depth of love and then… just before they could dive into the deeper depths of one another, one of them would've already suffocated. One of them would already run out of breath. And that one was Eren.

The clock was ticking, in less than 3 years and he was gone, forever. It wasn't like before, when they were kids and Eren would have always be ahead of her, running, running and running till he was out of her sight. Because eventually, the raven would've caught up with him again, and she would be able to see him again, hear him again, feel his presence again…

Except in this round of chasing, Eren would be gone to a place where Mikasa would never be able to reach, unless she ran out of her own breath as well during her chase, ran out of her own hope and succumb to despair and grief. Then again, that was unlikely. After all, she had already made a promise to herself to live on for the sake of Eren, for herself as well.

There were also still people, and the most trivial of things in this cruel world, which made life worth living…

The thought of being lovers with such little time scared her, and she knew if it were to happen, Eren wouldn't stop blaming himself for having left her, alone, in the dark. She didn't want that, if Eren really did felt that amount of love for her, she knew he would feel regret of having left her… and she didn't wish for him to feel such things in his death, where she would only want him to be at peace.

Mikasa was just scared, terrified of this thing called 'love'. She had heard it made people blind— well, not just to one's sight, but all five senses. Probably. She wouldn't know. She was terrified of falling so deeply in love with Eren to only lose him afterwards, and for him to lose her.

But it wasn't just because of her own selfish fear that caused her own honest confession to be locked up deep in her heart. In fact, she'd have fallen for him anyway despite the limited time he had left, except she didn't feel that it was right… for Eren.

To her, Eren was a reckless guy who had good intentions, but would always go about it in the wrong manner. But also, Eren was someone whom she also saw as a brave, caring and determined person. And because of such strong qualities which he had, was it really okay for him to love someone like her? Was it fair?

If Eren were to fall in love, Mikasa had expected it to be someone else… someone who wouldn't give him burden. It wasn't fair for him to have more unnecessary burden.

By unnecessary burden, it was Mikasa who saw herself as the burden, and she despised herself so much for it. She was blind, and if they were to fall in love, she assumed that due to her own lack of sight, Eren would be dragged down because of her, in a sense where they probably couldn't do things that lovers would normally do. Or at least, she felt that it would be Eren who would always be the one helping her, instead of the other way around—no, wait. That wasn't fair either. What was fair was that she would help him as much as he would help her.

But, could she help him, without her sight?

Will she be able to make him feel content, and not even more burdened?

'I can't be there for him...' she thought to herself, as she heard more hushed sobbing sounds from the brunette. She wondered what kind of face he was making, so far, whenever he cried during their training and war days before, his sorrowful expression would be mixed together with anger, vengeance…

Despite not being able to see, she highly doubted that was the expression he wore. Either way, she didn't want him to wear such a sorrowful expression.

"Don't cry…" She managed to speak. Her hand instinctively reached out, finding his face before it traced up his cheeks to around his eyes, then wiping a tear she had already felt running down her thumb. "I'm sorry… that I've been making you feel this way." Mikasa apologised softly.

"I'm sorry." Eren sighed quietly as he wiped the rest of his tears. "So… what's your… answer? Do you feel… the same fluttering feeling as I do?" He questioned quietly, as his hands fiddled with one another nervously.

Mikasa bit her lip. Goodness, she really… really wanted to express her love for him, what her heart felt for him. But she was too afraid, afraid of what emotions would come, afraid of being a burden.

"If you're concerned about…the time I have left, please don't." Eren spoke, as if he had read her mind. "I… really want to love you, with all the time that I have left, I want to express my love for you, Mikasa. I know it'll be painful but please… I know you're afraid of me leaving, and that falling deeper in love with me will just worsen that feeling—and my feelings too when our day of separation comes… but… but…" Eren bit his lip before his emerald orbs flashed to her, "I want to treasure you, love you, with all this time left, I really... I just..." Eren didn't know what else to say to reassure the obvious worry Mikasa had. He wasn't all too good in expressing himself either.

Love was a dangerous thing, they both knew. They both remembered the trauma Hannah went through when Franz died, back in the early days.

Eren was also restraining himself so much to lock his lips wither soft ones— now wasn't the time, he knew. After all, the raven before him seemed… uncertain. He need not think twice to know. He didn't want to kiss her if she was like this, so vulnerable, so unsure. Both of them weren't even good at such emotions regarding the topic 'love' in a romantic sense. And Eren didn't wish to take advantage of her uncertainty and vulnerability for the moment. He wasn't that sort of guy.

Just as Eren got lost in his deep thought, Mikasa brought him back with her voice. "Eren…" She called out softly.

"Yes, Mikasa…?"

"I'm sorry. I don't think the feeling is mutual."

A few weeks after that emotional night, was the military reunion, to celebrate the freedom they finally had achieved after many relentless, exhaustive years.

Everyone was there, which included Mikasa and Eren, although they were at different places during the reunion. Eren was at a corner, drinking by himself. The alcohol really burnt his throat, and that was fine. He thought that maybe it'd numb his feelings anyway. As for Mikasa… she went off with Historia for whatever reason. As long as she was in trusted hands, Eren was relaxed.

"What are you doing here alone in the corner?" A familiar voice spoke, Eren glanced to the corner where the person with the familiar voice leaned against the wall alongside with him and only let out a tiring sigh.

"State your business already, Armin." Eren groaned.

"Where's Mikasa?"

"Historia. Now leave." Eren grumbled as he went over to get another glass of whiskey.

"This is the first time I've seen you drink so much, was it that bad?" The blonde had asked, while the brunette chugged the glass down unhesitatingly, regretting that he even told the blonde about what hapened during that night.

"Aren't we over that topic?" He sighed, as his mind drifted off to that night… that heart-breaking night.

"Yes, Mikasa…?"

"I'm sorry. I don't think the feeling is mutual."

"W-What..? Mikasa… is it becau—"

Mikasa had cut him off swiftly, with a simple shake of her head and words that were sharp enough to have stabbed his heart. "I don't… love you, in the way you think I do."

Eren, however, was in disbelief. "W-What? But… before... the way you looked at me—"

"I'm blind, Eren." She reminded, and despite her orbs being dull, just one glance at them while listening to her words, gave the brunette a huge surge of regret, guilt. "Your eyes might've been deceiving you whenever you stare into mine or vice versa. I don't blame you for that, or any of this." She reminded softly, she didn't want him to blame himself for causing her blindness, although to her she felt it was more of her fault, her carelessness which caused this.

"I can't love you that way Eren, besides…" The raven smiled a little, "You deserve someone better, so much better. Someone who can at least see— admire the lovely faces you make, someone who us able to gaze at your hypnotising eyes." The raven proceeded to embrace him. "Really, I feel nothing similar to what you feel for me…maybe before, but not in this moment, not ever now. I'm sorry" She apologised, as the brunette cried even more, which only made the raven's embrace tighten. "I'm so sorry." She apologised again, ever so… sorrowfully, although the brunette couldn't tell if it was because of pity.

'Then why is your heart racing…?' Eren thought to himself, feeling each and every beat her heart made when she had embraced him. It made him a little happy, feeling her heart beating, it was proof of her existence, of her life. The only thing sorrowful was the way it was beating, or rather racing.

'Is it for someone else…? Is there… someone else?'

Eren got another glass, before chugging it down. "There must be someone else." He sighed before Armin snatched his glass away. "No more drinking, you'll get a hangover at this rate." He groaned. "Isn't obvious why she said all those things? She's afraid of being hurt and especially hurting you. She loves you Ere—"

"Armin. Really, enough of that. I know she's scared, but I don't wish to be in a relationship with her if she… doesn't want to." He explained briefly. "And she probably loves someone else."

"Do you still love her?" Armin asked as he gave Eren the look of seriousness.

"Yes." Eren responded back, wearing a firm look as he replied with all seriousness and genuineness. Though, there was some sort of pained expression that appeared on his face for a brief moment before he shook it away.

"Do you think there's something else stopping her from loving you, rather than her own 'selfish' fear?" The blonde asked, already so certain of her emotions towards him. "Like I said before, she's blind, but it doesn't mean she's see through. You don't know the hundred percent of her."

Silence.

"You don't know her other intentions, you don't know her lies. The scariest thing is, you don't know all of her heart… how do you expect to love her? To understand her?How—"

"Hey." Spoke another familiar voice, the two males turned to have eye contact with a familiar pair of crystal eyes. "Eren, What the hell are you doing here?" Annie asked, which the brunette rolled his eyes at. "Am I not allowed to be here? Ex-traitor." Eren snapped back. "Now… now..." Armin chuckled nervously in an attempt to calm the two down, he didn't want a fight to break out between them… again.

Though, surprisingly, Annie didn't seem too offended by that. "As much as I'd love to strangle you again, Mikasa's with Jean now, just thought you should know that." The blonde shrugged as she took a sip of the wine she held.

Eren flinched a little, "That… doesn't concern me." He mumbled, a part of him hoping that 'someone else' wasn't that horse-face, she could've done much better.

"It does, go see for yourself." Annie spoke simply before walking off. Armin glanced at Eren, "Well, let's see what's so concerning. You know you want to." He sighed before he walked to where he last saw Jean, Eren following behind. Curiosity and possibly maybe even, Jealousy, finally got him right in the bag.

"Jean." Mikasa sighed. "For the last time, I'm not interested..." Mikasa mumbled, wondering how the hell she got caught up in the situation she was currently. Historia had to use the washroom, and left Jean in charge of her. She really hated this, the fact people had to be in charge of her. She felt like a caged bird… and yet with Eren, instead of 'being in charge of', she felt being taken care of whenever it was Eren. Yet, she left him alone for the night… she knew he needed to, after that night of confessions.

Putting that aside, she had something else to worry about. "Jean, stop it." Mikasa grumbled, as Jean shifted closer to her, about to wrap his arm around her, she didn't have to see to know it, she could tell just by instinct, and goodness was she annoyed. She wanted to flip him over so bad, the only thing stopping her was the fact she might get more attention than she already was. She already had heard whispers from other ex-cadets and military officials of her having lost her sight, and it was agitating having to put up with the whispers that soon evolved to gossip. 'I am blind, not deaf. Did those idiots not know that?' Mikasa thought to herself.

Back on track, this wasn't like Jean, who was currently trying to get all up in her. She assumed it was the alcohol, although he didn't reek of any.

Jean sighed as he stood up wanting to get a drink, "Fine, I'm sorry, wait here I want to get a drink." He spoke, however just as he was about to leave, he tripped over something, losing his balance as he tried to grab hold of whatever was around, to no avail. And then, he accidentally grabbed Mikasa's sleeve, pulling her down to the ground, having pinned her down. "Ah! I'm sorry—are you—"Before Jean could finish his sentence or before Mikasa could react, they both felt the atmosphere suddenly tensed.

A familiar tension—or rather, presence that Mikasa knew. She tilted her head to the side where she felt his aura. "Eren…?" She called out to the brunette, who wasn't all smiles when he saw the position Mikasa was in.

His protective side grew and grew, so did his anger as he stomped towards Jean in rage, "What the fuck do you think you're doing horse-face?" He growled.

Author's Notes: Hello, I'm back. I hope this update is alright, apologies if it's poorly written.