jake sat on his fence, then died. it was sad. he then somehow went to starclan even though he was a kittypet. he looked over his whole domain, disappointed that he had his testicles cut off before he could make the entire cat population ginger. "darn." jake got tons of pity from the fandom, then went on to spend his time in starclan getting his funky on. he then recognized a dying cat. "woah it's the mother of my not-child, lazy cat." he walked over to tallstar. "hey tall-y how's it been." tallstar went out of character again "oh sweet jake! my little honeypot, you are the love of my life, i waited all this time to see you! I helped protect your son! I understand that you moved on, it's okay!" jake smiled awkwardly. "haha yeah but i never stopped loving you." he looked over to the other starclan cat's he had woo'd, sweating. "hey do you wanna come over here for a second?" jake led him away and then raced out of cat heaven, sweating. "woah, so close." then who-ever wrote the third arc came up to him. "hey wanna be re-incarnated? we need an interesting plot." "ok" jake then became rainwhisker, the biggest side character ever. "nice! now i can mate with all the rogues I want and never get any consequences for it. side characters can never have forbidden love besides in crookedstar's promise." the authors decided whatever this gray version of jake was doing, it wasn't as interesting as giving cats super powers. jake-rainwhisker proceeded to mate with every rogue he came across until he had the death of a side character, going back to cat heaven again for some reason.
and that was the end of jakey wakeys story