I'm sorry to have disappeared on you for so long. It's been a whirlwind of life changes the last two months but I can't really complain because on the whole it's for the better. Even if I am a bit homesick already.

I had this chapter written up with the last one but there was something about it that I didn't like. It feels too much like a clear cut ending... but I guess they can't all be cliffhangers, right?

He was not a man prone to anxieties or accustomed to doubts. He had led armies with confidence, handled political negotiations without faltering, and held absolute control of court politics. Interrogations were second-nature to him – either he was given the information he wanted or the subject suffered the consequences. Yet here he was, pacing along the table, planning his questions as carefully as if he were planning a courtship. Indeed, in all his life, he could think of only two times when he had been more anxious than now: courting Ygraine and Arthur's birth.

Part of his anxiety stemmed from his desire to impress Katrina, or at least not disappoint her. They were not courting; they were both beyond the age of marriage. He thought of it as mutual companionship although he received far more than he gave. It was in the nature of women, he supposed, to temper the nature of men and Katrina was no exception. Their long friendship simply meant that Katrina knew Uther better than everyone else and therefore was a keen judge of his behavior. Like Ygraine, Katrina was a compassionate and fiery woman. After the fiasco of weeks ago, Uther had keenly felt her disappointment – doubled because her worst reprimand had been, "If Ygraine were still alive, she would be disappointed in you." Deep down, Uther knew she was right and her comment eerily echoed one he had heard before, a long time ago.

Gaius had uttered those words to him in that bitter time after Ygraine's death. Uther had been so lost in his grief and consumed by the war on magic that he had all but disinherited Arthur. As a baby and toddler, Arthur had so looked like his mother that Uther could not stand to be in the same room for long. He never played with his son though the nurses and various noblewomen brought Arthur into his presence. It had been Gaius' persistence and Arthur's own stubborn refusal to be ignored that had worn down Uther's self-imposed isolation. He could remember the turning point, could never forget it. It had been Arthur's 5th birthday and he had begged Gaius to bring him to Uther. Arthur had reached the curious stage and Uther had avoided him more than ever. The boy's questions were innocent but Uther could not bear to the memories. On that day, Uther flatly refused to see Arthur – all he wanted to do was drink and wallow in his grief on the anniversary of Ygraine's death. Arthur, unable to wait outside any longer, had burst in, and seeing his father in tears, leaped into Uther's lap. He gently ran his little hands over Uther's face in his concern – in exactly the same manner as Ygraine. Angry and miserable at the similarity, Uther shoved him off and yelled for him to leave, get out of my sight. I never wish to look upon you again!

Gaius had moved in front of Arthur, saying Ygraine would never have stood for this – he is your son! If she could see you like this, she would be so disappointed. He then tried to take Arthur but Arthur held his ground. Why do you hate me? Uther will never forget the look on Arthur's face. His own son had looked up at him, afraid, heartbroken, and confused. He looked so like Ygraine in that moment that it broke something within him; Uther had swept him up and held him close.

This boy was not his son, was not from Camelot. He had no responsibility to the boy. He did not like how protective everyone became around him but perhaps he could understand it. Whether it was instinct at his youth, his fragile emotional state, or the evidence he bore of a life of abuse – even Uther felt pity. As much as he tried to ignore it in favor of his responsibilities, he was continually forced to remember it – by Katrina, by Arthur, Morgana, and even Gaius. He hadn't needed Katrina's reprimand that day to know he had made an error. The boy's sheer terror had been a slap in the face. Perhaps he had gone too far.

Thus far, the boy had presented no threat other than to win the loyalty of everyone he met. As far as he was aware, the boy spent most of his time in Camelot healing in bed. Katrina gave him regular updates on the boy's development but he himself had not interacted with him since that day. Everyone assured him the boy was harmless and Uther could see that Arthur was determined to keep him. He had hoped the separation from the boy would give Arthur perspective but it only seemed to have cemented his resolve. Uther could not allow it. Arthur's first responsibility was to Camelot as her prince and adopting the boy would be serious issue when Arthur formed his own family. If he prohibited it, Morgana would fight to keep him as well, and that could easily ruin her chances for a good marriage. Katrina was in no state to care for the boy. He could arrange for the boy to be taken in by a family but he was sure his children would protest. There was one other solution, a compromise that Uther was prepared to make, but to follow through with it, Uther had to be absolutely certain of the boy's character.

He was drawn from his musings when the sound of his guests approaching. Katrina entered first, letting Uther kiss her hand before taking her seat at the table. Arthur and Morgana held Merlin's hands between them. Arthur was watching Merlin but Morgana was glaring warningly at Uther. The boy kept his head down, obviously hesitant to meet him again. Uther gestured for a chair and with a nod to Arthur, picked up Merlin to set him on it. He did not miss that the boy stiffened in fear and looked desperately at Arthur before holding his breath. Studying the boy carefully, Uther realized that even by Gaius' estimated age, Merlin was very small, and exceedingly thin. He looked younger somehow, and Uther finally noticed his outfit. He smiled and raised a brow at Arthur. Arthur shrugged innocently.

Deciding to begin anew, he asked, "Boy, do you know who I am?"

Merlin glanced up at him, his eyes going to Uther's crown and face blanching as he quickly nodded and bowed. When he straightened, he began to tremble.

Uther remembered that on the few occasions he dealt with Cenred, the man had always insisted on wearing his crown – even on hunts. His crown had changed on every occasion, each time he wore a more extravagant and ostentatious version. He obviously relied on it to be a symbol of his power. They could be reasonably sure now that Merlin had escaped from Cenred. Putting these two facts together, Uther supposed the boy now associated crowns with people like Cenred. The depth of his bows and the way he kneeled that first day – yes, the boy was conditioned to fear royalty. Uther knew eventually the boy would need to get over it, but for now, with only family and Katrina present, he decided he could indulge the boy. He removed his crown and passed it to a servant, giving a half-hearted excuse that it needed polishing.

This time when Merlin glanced up, his eyes lingered a little longer, watching the servant take his crown curiously. Speaking gently, Uther asked, "Can you tell me your name?"

Uther did not miss that Merlin glanced at Arthur before looking back at Uther. The boy's breath hitched and he could see Arthur about to interrupt. He gestured for Arthur to wait and let Merlin take his time. Arthur looked annoyed but he obeyed. When Merlin looked back at him, Arthur nodded encouragingly. Merlin's hand rose hesitantly until he was tugging on his shirt collar. Searching Uther's face one more time, Merlin took a trembling breath. Oh so quietly, he answered, "M-m-merlin, s-sir." He glanced up, perhaps unsure of how to address Uther.

At least the boy was polite. "Merlin, like the hawk?" He smiled in what he hoped was a reassuring way.

A quick glance again and Merlin nodded. Obviously the boy was not comfortable speaking. Uther was sure Merlin was uncomfortable being the center of attention as he was now, stood on a chair with everyone standing around him. He gently placed a hand on Merlin's shoulder, noticing the frightened flinch. "That is a fine name, Merlin. Now, while Arthur escorts Morgana to her seat, we will go to our seats. You'll be sitting next to me." He ignored Merlin's panicked look at Arthur and helped him off the chair. Arthur looked like he wanted to protest but Uther shook his head. The boy was going to have to learn some independence. "Don't be frightened. Arthur will take his seat next to you as soon as he has helped Morgana to her seat next to Katrina."

Morgana took Arthur's arm and said loudly. "It's not fair of you to steal my handsome escort, Uther, but I suppose this ugly troll will have to do."

Arthur squawked indignantly. "What?! I am NOT a troll!"

Their banter worked. Merlin gave a nervous laugh and let Uther lead him to the table.

Walking around the table with Morgana, Arthur finally noticed the seating arrangements. "Is that my old high chair?" he called out, surprised.

Uther lifted Merlin into it. "Yes, I had it brought here. I thought it might make Merlin more comfortable at the table. He seems rather small for a normal chair."

Arthur came around to sit on Merlin's other side; still on Uther's right side but with Merlin between them. "I didn't know you kept it." He ran his hand over the familiar carvings.

Uther took his seat. "I kept most of your old things. They are well made and will serve you well for your children."

Arthur looked surprised. Morgana asked, "And what of my children?"

Uther was caught off guard but Katrina answered for him. "He's kept some of your old things too. Uther really is quite sentimental, privately of course." Katrina patted his arm and he cleared his throat.

Uther brought his attention back to Merlin, who was still avoiding eye contact. "Now, Merlin, can you tell me how old you are?"

Gaius had only been able to estimate, and from Arthur's interest, he assumed that no one had bothered to ask the boy. Merlin nodded and held up six fingers without looking up. Arthur laughed and when Uther looked at him, he said, "I should have known he could count. He can read and write, so it follows that he can also count."

Uther was surprised by that. Slaves were generally kept uneducated and the common people learned only as much as their trades required. Only nobles could afford general education for their children which implied that either Merlin was noble born or that Cenred had compelling reasons to educate him. "Can you tell me where you were born?"

Merlin only shrugged and shook his head. He must not remember then. Perhaps Cenred had taken him too young. "Merlin, do you remember your parents?"

The change in Merlin was immediate. The boy looked incredibly sad as he nodded and replied, "M-mam-m-ma." Uther knew that Arthur suspected she was dead. He had made concessions, just in case, in his proposed solution.

"And did you know your father?"

The boy's tears ran down freely as he shook his head. Arthur wiped them away and settled his arm around Merlin protectively. It didn't appear that Merlin was hiding anything, so Uther decided to leave it at that. It was possible, though unlikely, that Merlin was Cenred's illegitimate child and that's why Cenred had taken such an interest in him. Another possibility, and slightly more likely, Merlin and his mother had been taken as hostages to keep some lord under his control. Uther did not think it likely that Cenred would educate his slaves but it remained a possibility as well. He still had his doubts about Merlin's background, but knowing Merlin had been raised somewhat like a noble child made it easier on his final decision.

"It's not relevant. You will soon have a new family." Merlin glanced up at him with teary eyes and he saw Arthur and Morgana look worriedly at each other. Uther smiled at Merlin. "Perhaps after dinner you can show me your reading and writing skills. Would you like that, Merlin?"

Merlin nodded and offered a watery smile. Just then the food arrived. "I took the liberty of ordering a stew for tonight. Gaius told me you two have been depriving Merlin of Camelot's culinary wonders." Uther looked pointedly at Arthur and Morgana.

Morgana was indignant, Arthur looked apologetic, and Merlin looked around curiously. "Gaius told me he needed soft and bland foods. He didn't say for how long!"

"And Arthur told me the same."

Uther heard Merlin's belly gurgle as he sniffed the bowl in front of him. Katrina smiled at Merlin and said "Well, I say it's been long enough. Does it smell good, Merlin?"

Merlin nodded eagerly. They began eating, Arthur helpfully pushing Merlin closer to the table and handing him a bread roll. Merlin looked at it with wide eyes and looked at Arthur. Arthur said, "Of course the whole thing is yours. See, there's plenty more."

Merlin continued to look at the roll with something like wonder in his eyes. Uther leaned close. "Would you like me to show you how Arthur used to eat his stew and bread?"

Merlin smiled shyly, as Arthur colored slightly, and held out the roll, still avoiding Uther's eyes. Uther took it and ripped it into small pieces, dropping them all into Merlin's stew. Then he used Merlin's spoon to push the bread into the stew, soaking the pieces. He scooped up a single piece, blew on it, and held it out for Merlin – who did not hesitate to accept the spoon. "He called it bread soup."

Merlin smiled again and accepted his spoon with a quick glance up. Leaning back, Uther noticed the table had become quiet as the others watched. He turned to Katrina. She smiled at him proudly. "It's almost like you've fed children before, Uther," she said teasingly.

He cleared his throat and focused on his own dinner. "Er – well, I suppose one never forgets."

He let his children eat and converse with Merlin while he studied the boy. Katrina seemed content to leave Uther to his thoughts and joined in with Arthur and Morgana. Merlin savored the food – chewing thoroughly and sipping happily. It was amusing to watch him spoon deeply into the bowl, searching out the solid bits but trying to be subtle about it. He ate slowly but steadily as he listened to the others talk. When addressed directly, Merlin never spoke but answered by shaking and nodding his head. Every once in a while, Merlin glanced at Uther prompting him to smile repeatedly as that was they only "friendly" expression he could think of.

It was rather tiring. He wondered if his cheeks would be sore tomorrow.

Merlin seemed to be adjusting to Uther's presence fairly easily. He flinched the first few times Uther reached to wipe his face or helped him break up large chunks. He gradually made more eye contact too, and Uther patted him gently each time.

Uther noticed that during the introduction Merlin constantly checked for Arthur's approval. It was the same now and, amusingly enough, the boy mimicked Arthur as he ate. Uther didn't think Arthur had given Merlin instructions to that end. It was just another habit that remained ingrained; Merlin had simply substituted Arthur as his new authority figure.

When everyone was finished, Uther carefully turned Merlin's chair to face him. The tension at the table rose immediately. He waited until Merlin met his eyes. "I have a surprise for you. While we digest I will ask you questions and I expect you to answer honestly. If you do not know the answer, say so. If it becomes too distressing, say so. My intention is not to upset you, Merlin, but there are things about you that I want to hear from you. Afterwards, there will be a sweet dessert as a reward. Are you ready?"

Merlin's small face was serious. He looked back at Arthur who nodded and mimed taking a deep breath. Merlin faced Uther and took a shaky, deep breath. It drew a small smile from Uther as he began to appreciate the depth of the bond between them.

"Very well. First, I want to confirm what we know about your background. You were a slave, correct?"

Merlin's lip quivered and he nodded sadly, averting his eyes as he did so. Uther raised his chin until their eyes met again. "Your master – was it Cenred?"

Uther saw Merlin shiver and noted the goosebumps on the boy's arm. Even without Merlin's nod, it was confirmation. Arthur looked like he wanted to comfort Merlin but he restrained himself. Uther continued, "Do you know why he wanted you? Why he would continue to pursue you?"

Uther saw the moment Merlin shut down. He tried to answer, an aborted nod and a desperate gasp. His mouth opened and closed soundlessly while his hands raked his throat. He shook uncontrollably and those clear, expressive eyes clouded with fear. The boy's breath came in panicked gulps. Uther did not wait for Arthur to intervene; he picked up Merlin and passed him to Arthur. "It's alright, Merlin. I suppose the answer is clear enough. Take a deep breath and control yourself." Merlin whimpered at Uther's touch and when Arthur set him on his lap, the boy scrambled, panicked. Uther realized Merlin must be having a flashback. He felt a little guilty as he watched Arthur set him on the table and hold his hands, murmuring quietly until Merlin's awareness returned. Shaking still, Merlin finally collapsed into Arthur's chest and let Arthur hold him.

As they waited while Arthur soothed Merlin, Uther saw Katrina and Morgana were both tense – poised to interrupt if necessary. He raised his brows at them. Their reactions annoyed him – had he not promised to make an effort? He thought his question was harmless enough – although in retrospect, not quite as. Katrina grasped his hand under the table and said quietly, "It's your duty to ask. Just as it's our duty to worry."

He watched curiously as Arthur spoke quietly to Merlin. This, this was the basis for the bond between them. Arthur displayed great patience and maturity in the way he handled Merlin's distress, and Merlin showed absolute trust in Arthur. He knew now, that his decision was settled. All that he needed now was to confirm that Merlin's escape had not been orchestrated, unlikely though it was, by Cenred.

When Merlin calmed, Arthur made to set him on the chair once more. Merlin did not protest, though Uther saw his small hands holding tightly to Arthur's shirt. Uther extended a hand to stop them, saying, "Merlin, you may sit with Arthur if you like."

Merlin nodded desperately though he blushed slightly. Arthur immediately comforted him again and said quietly, "It's alright, Merlin. We can't even imagine how terrible this all is for you; you don't have to feel ashamed for anything." From the safety of Arthur's lap, Merlin looked around the table, finally meeting Uther's eyes. He took a deep breath and nodded, surprising Uther with his resolve.

Nodding approvingly, Uther continued, "I won't ask you any more details about your enslavement, Merlin. I do wish to know about your escape, however. How did you escape?"

Merlin shrugged. His breath hitched, but he swallowed before answering, "M-m-mam-ma."

"You escaped with your mother?" Merlin nodded. "Did you know about it before it happened?"

Merlin shook his head. "M-master had m-m-me."

Uther thought about it. He supposed that Merlin's mother would have had to plan the escape to take Merlin at the last possible moment. He wondered how she had arranged the opportunity but decided it was unlikely Merlin knew the details. "She didn't tell you at all? Not even before he – before you were with him?"

Again, Merlin shook his head. He dropped his head down, coloring again. Pressing his hand to his throat he quietly answered, "D-d-didn't see her. I… p-p-p-" he took a breath "P-punished."

Morgana and Katrina looked upset. Uther pushed on, wanting to finish quickly. "So she took you, and you ran away?"

Merlin shook his head. His little hands were clutching his shirt collar again. Uther made a note to himself to ask Gaius about that. When his voice failed him, Merlin mimed riding a horse. "You rode away? What happened to the horse?"

New tears welled up in his eyes. Arthur helpfully asked, "Did you ride it for very long? Until it collapsed?" Merlin nodded.

Uther continued. "And then you ran? Was your mother still with you?"

Merlin nodded.

"When Arthur found you, you were alone. What happened to your mother? Did you get lost?"

Morgana cleared her throat and glared when Uther looked. He ignored it and turned back to Merlin whose tears were rolling freely once more. Merlin held his hands out in front of him and pulled an imaginary trigger – like one would shoot a crossbow, Uther realized.

"I see." Uther decided not to press further but this time, Merlin continued. "B-b-blood-d… t-trail… away…"

It was clear the boy's mother would not have willingly abandoned him after escaping and running so far. She was most likely dead, as Arthur suspected. "She led them away from you." Merlin nodded. "That's the kind of thing mothers do, Merlin. Her end goal was to get you away and she did. I'm sure she told you to keep running." Merlin nodded. His watery gaze stayed on Uther now. "Arthur already told me how he found you; he heard the commotion and tracked you. And when Arthur found you, what made you trust him?" This was key. Had the boy recognized Arthur as a knight? Had he recognized Arthur as the prince of Camelot? By Arthur's account, the boy did not see the fight, so how had the boy known Arthur was safe?

Merlin glanced up at Arthur thoughtfully. He wrung his hands and looked at Uther. He was no longer crying, instead he seemed determined to answer but unsure of how. Uther let him take his time. Merlin fidgeted a while more before slipping off Arthur's lap. What followed next was the most curious explanation Uther had ever witnessed.

Merlin pointed at himself and then lay down. He stood up again, walked a few steps, and pointed at Arthur. Then he cautiously stepped towards where he had lain holding his hands up the way men approached spooked horses. He backed away and mimed drawing a sword and putting it aside. Uther saw Arthur grimace as he looked at Uther. So, Arthur had willingly disarmed himself in the presence of an unknown person? Uther filed that away to discuss later. Merlin continued his charade – he stepped close again, then sat, again holding his hands up. He met Uther's eyes, and Uther was taken aback by the open honesty in Merlin's eyes. Merlin stood and approached Arthur, clambering into his lap and reaching up to run his hands over his face.

Just like Arthur that night.

Just like Ygraine.

Uther swallowed as he watched. Merlin finally faced him. He gulped in a breath and said, "N-no one ev-ver asked b-b-bef-f-fore."

Uther leaned closer. "What did he ask?"

Merlin shrugged – as if it didn't matter to him, which Uther found interesting. Merlin looked at Arthur as he answered, "T-t-to help-p. M-m-my n-name. T-t-to t-t-t-trust. N-no one ev-ver asked."

Arthur hugged Merlin close and Merlin happily snuggled with him. Uther sat back. It had never occurred to him to reason out the behaviors of former slaves. He simply accepted that slavery left them damaged. However, with such few words, this young boy had him reeling from the significance of being asked for permission after a lifetime of being treated as property. As he watched Merlin draw comfort from Arthur's embrace, he thought to himself that Arthur would be a great father one day. If only he could be as great a king, he sighed to himself.

Uther waved a servant forward. "You have been very brave tonight, Merlin. Dessert should arrive soon enough. Now, I would like to see an example of your skills. Write your letters… please."

Merlin nodded. Arthur set him back on the chair as the servant set the stationery tray on the table. Merlin shivered and Arthur immediately removed his coat to wrap around him. "Are you cold, Merlin?" Uther asked.

Arthur answered, saying, "When he gets tired, or distressed, he becomes very cold. Gaius thinks it will pass as he grows healthier."

Uther found Merlin watching him seriously, as if awaiting Uther's judgement on the subject. Uther nodded and Merlin seemed relieved. He leaned forward and carefully took the quill. He passed it to Arthur along with a piece of parchment and waited expectantly. Uther raised a brow and Arthur seemed just as confused. Morgana spoke up. "He wants you to line it." She addressed Uther directly, "When he wrote the alphabet for me his letters meandered somewhat and it seems to bother him. Leon ruled the paper for him to write to Arthur."

Uther supposed it was reasonable for Merlin's age. Katrina drew his attention with small talk until Merlin finished. His surprise must have been evident as he heard Morgana and Katrina chuckling. He schooled his face before addressing Merlin. "Merlin, your writing is very neat. I am impressed by your skill. Are you sure you are only six years old?"

Merlin's eye widened and he nodded seriously. Uther chuckled and took his hand. "Do you know that when Arthur was six he barely knew his letters? He kept running away from his tutors to play." Arthur's face reddened as Morgana laughed. "And Morgana was the messiest child! She got ink all over her dresses and even her face!" This time it was Morgana who reddened while Arthur laughed. Merlin giggled quietly, hiding his mouth with his free hand.

Katrina chimed in, saying, "Uther makes fun of Arthur and Morgana, but his own writing is like chicken scratch! I despaired that his courtship with Ygraine would fail because she couldn't read his letters! She used to tell me, 'I hope he doesn't think me vapid because I never answer his questions, I just can't read his handwriting!'"

Despite the sting of the memories, Uther found himself chuckling. He remembered his anxiety reading Ygraine's letters and thinking that her lack of direct reply meant she wasn't interested. He also remembered his relief when she finally called him out on his terrible writing. It was similar to the relief he felt now, seeing everyone laugh together. It had been a long time since they enjoyed their time together. "Merlin, can you draw?"

Everyone watched curiously. Merlin wrinkled his nose and shrugged. It was yet another curious action that drew Uther's interest. He handed a new piece of parchment to Merlin. "Why don't you draw something while we wait? You can draw anything you like."

Following the example from before, Uther engaged the others in light conversation while Merlin drew. Dessert was delivered a few minutes later but Merlin ignored it as he hunched over his paper and drew. When Uther laid down his spoon, surreptitiously licking it for the last bit of honey, Merlin slid his paper towards him shyly. Uther studied the paper.

A small part of him was let down. Compared to Merlin's relatively advanced writing skills, his drawings were far simpler, yet age appropriate. It reminded him of the drawings Arthur had made when he was Merlin's age.

There were several small drawings around the page, most featuring an adult size figure and a small one. Perhaps in recognition of his simple figures, Merlin had labelled each of the adults. Katrina was there, holding a book in front of Merlin. Morgana and Gwen held an overly large needle and thread, as well as clothes. Next, unexpectedly, was Leon – Arthur's head knight if Uther remembered correctly. He held Merlin's hand while they stood on some steps. The sun was drawn above and lumps (mountains?) below. Finally, there were several labelled 'Arthur.' Arthur carrying Merlin, holding Merlin on a seat of some sort, and Arthur holding a candle over Merlin in a bed. Smiling he passed the paper to Katrina and pushed Merlin's dessert in front of him. Merlin studied the cake and sugar plum before picking up his spoon. He took a bit of cake and sniffed it. Upon tasting it, his eyes widened comically as he looked up at Arthur and everyone laughed.

Uther indulged in his thoughts while Merlin ate. He watched everyone's reactions as the paper made its way around the table. Katrina smiled fondly and winked at Merlin. Morgana barely contained her squeal, as did her handmaiden when she was waved over. Arthur contained his emotions better, but Uther decided that he seemed surprised by what he saw. He held on to the paper longest – until even Merlin began to look concerned. Arthur slipped the paper inside his tunic, smiled at Merlin and ruffled his hair. "How is dessert Merlin?"

Uther was sure now, of his decision. The boy seemed innocent enough, and truthfully, Uther was impressed by his resilience. He remembered very clearly the condition of the boy when he first arrived. The physical injuries combined with the emotional trauma was no light burden, yet Merlin appeared to be overcoming them with an inner fortitude Uther never expected. Physically, the boy was still frail and Uther doubted his physique would ever be suited to bearing arms. However, whatever his intentions, Cenred had educated Merlin well and from what Katrina had told him, he was eager to learn more. Intelligence might be the boy's greatest asset. With time, and proper guidance, Uther was reasonably certain the boy could grow into a valuable citizen of Camelot. Intelligent, and loyal to Arthur, Merlin could serve Arthur very well in an advisory capacity. He checked himself before his thoughts ran willy-nilly.

In terms of implementing his decision, Uther already had a plan. Arrangements could begin in the morning – seeing Merlin's dependence on Arthur he knew it would be some time before most changes could happen. Keeping them together would assure Arthur of his intentions as well as allow time for Merlin's rehabilitation. He would have to impose goals for Merlin's progress; perhaps dinners such as these could become regular occurrences. He was surprised to admit to himself that he had enjoyed himself tonight.

Morgana's yawns drew him out of his thoughts. Seizing the opportunity, he said, "Morgana, you look tired. Perhaps it is time to retire. Arthur, why don't you escort Morgana back to her rooms?"

Arthur nodded. Merlin, having finished his cake but not touched his sugar plum, put down his spoon somewhat reluctantly when Arthur replied, "Of course, father. Shall we, Merlin?"

"Actually, Arthur, you may leave Merlin for the moment. Stop by my rooms on your way back. There is a scroll on my desk. Bring it back here."

Arthur looked like he wanted to argue, especially since Merlin looked unhappy about being left behind. Uther headed off the discussion by saying, "Merlin hasn't finished his pudding. The sugar plum is the best part! Leave him here – you won't be gone more than a few minutes."

Arthur studied Merlin. "Will you wait for me here, Merlin?"

Merlin looked worriedly at Uther and Katrina. She spoke to him reassuringly, "Go on, Arthur. Don't worry, Merlin, Arthur will be right back."

Merlin finally nodded and watched sadly as Arthur walked out with Morgana. Turning back hesitantly, he held his head down and did not resume eating. Uther drew up his chin. "Merlin, you are safe here. Arthur will be right back. Why don't you eat your plum?"

He picked up the sticky fruit with a slight grimace – he hated feeling sticky – and let Merlin use his hands to eat it. Arthur had always preferred to eat with his fingers and Uther thought it might make Merlin feel more at ease.

Two bites in, Merlin was enthusiastically enjoying the treat. Katrina giggled as she watched Merlin happily. "Do you like it, Merlin?"

Merlin nodded excitedly. He held out his plum to her and she laughed. "That's quite alright, Merlin. I ate mine earlier. That one is all yours!"

To his surprise, Merlin held it out to Uther next. Wanting to see his reaction, Uther took a small bite. Katrina slapped his hand lightly. "Uther! That is Merlin's plum!"

Merlin was watching him expectantly. "It is very tasty, thank you. No, no you enjoy it, Merlin," he said when Merlin offered the small plum again. "I ate mine earlier too." Merlin resumed eating it happily. He finished moments later – the plum had been very small – and set the pit down on his plate. Uther dipped his napkin in water and proceeded to wipe his sticky face and hands.

"Really, Uther, you are a natural. You haven't forgotten a thing!" Katrina winked at him.

He chuckled. "You as well. Don't think I didn't notice his outfit." Merlin glanced down at it. "Arthur had one just like it." He explained, "He gave his nurse nightmares with it! That boy wouldn't remove it for anything. I swear his mother could smell him from the afterlife. It was Katrina who finally suggested making duplicates." Uther stopped in his tracks. Merlin was looking confused.

It was Katrina who understood. "I am not Arthur's mother, Merlin. His mother, Uther's wife, died just after he was born."

Uther took a deep breath and bore the memories with closed eyes until he felt someone clambering up into his lap. He opened his eyes just in time to see Merlin wrap his arms around him. Taken aback, he sat quite still and looked at Katrina for help. She smiled sadly and took his hand. He wrapped his other arm around Merlin. When he looked up, Uther was surprised to see Merlin crying.

"Don't cry, Merlin." Was he crying because he missed his own mother… or perhaps with concern for Uther? Wanting to reassure Merlin, Uther was hit with sudden inspiration. Letting go of Katrina, he carried Merlin to the window. The boy was really too light. "I am going to tell you a secret now – the same secret I told Arthur when he was your age." He opened the shutters and felt Merlin shiver in the cold breeze. "Do you see all those stars up there?"

Merlin looked up. "Those are all the mothers and fathers that have had to leave us. That is where they go so that they can watch over us. Your mother is up there too." Merlin leaned out, searching the skies desperately, looking back at Uther with deep longing in his eyes. He could almost hear Merlin wondering which one. "Find the star that winks back at you most brightly. That is how she waves at you."

He held Merlin closer to the window to keep him from leaning too far. Merlin's hands held tightly to Uther's shirt until, after a few moments, he relaxed. "Did you find her?" Merlin nodded – and to Uther's astonishment – he rested his head on Uther's shoulder, still looking out the window.

Katrina joined them, bringing Arthur's coat and laying it over Merlin. She held Uther's hand and they stood there. Uther felt a pang of sadness; this should have been the way he stood with Ygraine and Arthur he thought bitterly. Katrina spoke quietly. "Fate can be quite bittersweet."

He met her knowing gaze. Had she felt his thoughts? "That was a tender story. I imagine Arthur asked for it often. It must have been fate that brought Merlin to you and Arthur. You saw the way Arthur was with him tonight. He's proven very capable. I see the way you are with him too. You knew exactly what he needed to hear. And I know your decision was made before tonight. That's why it's bittersweet. Little Merlin has suffered a lot in his short life, but now it has brought him to exactly the people who can and will care for him. A new family."

Uther squeezed her hand. She really was like Ygraine and though he did not love her, he was glad to have her friendship. They stood for a few minutes before they heard Arthur's rushing footsteps approaching. He paused before entering, no doubt trying to make himself look like he hadn't just run around the castle. Uther smirked as Arthur entered, still smoothing his hair. He approached cautiously.

"I brought your scroll, father. Did something happen? Is Merlin alright?"

Uther turned slightly. He was a little surprised that Merlin had not reacted to Arthur's return. Katrina peeked over his shoulder. "Oh, poor dear, he's fallen asleep!"

Arthur reached to take him. "I should take him to bed."

Uther nodded at the scroll. "Open that first."

Arthur did as he was told. He read quickly, grinning by the end. He looked up to Uther. "Is this for real? He can stay?"

Uther resisted the urge to roll his eyes. "You ask that as if you would ever have let me send him away!"

Arthur was still smiling brightly. "You really will take him as your ward?"

"I have seen many good character traits in him tonight – resilience, intelligence, honesty, and compassion. Like Morgana, he will be outside the line of succession, but also like Morgana, I think he will one day be a worthy advisor to you. So you better do your best by him, Arthur." He gently slipped Merlin into Arthur's arms.

"I will," Arthur promised solemnly. Uther rolled the scroll and tucked it in Arthur's tunic. He saw the drawing also tucked in there. He was curious to know what Arthur's figures were about, but a small movement from Merlin halted his questions. Merlin had begun to suck his thumb in his sleep. Before he could think about it, Uther gently pulled the boy's hand away. He remembered the difficulty he had had breaking that habit with Arthur. He tucked the coat around Merlin. "We can discuss the details later. Off to bed with you. Go on."

Arthur had been watching him curiously and he still lingered a moment. "Thank you, father. Good night. Good night, Katrina."

"Good night, Arthur."

Uther watched his son walk out feeling more like a father than he had in a long while. He realized that Gaius had been right. He had let his royal responsibilities overshadow his duty as a father. It was bound to happen again, but perhaps not too soon. For now he had another young child to raise. He turned to Katrina. "Do you really need to leave? Can you not extend your stay?"

Katrina smiled at him and looked out the window. "There has been an awful lot of snow this winter." She met Uther's eyes. "I will have to leave eventually. There are affairs I must set in order back home and – you know I must leave. I never even meant you to know. This was meant to be a spontaneous visit, one last chance to relive our adventures. It's not fair to you, Uther, or anyone here. You have all experienced too much loss already."

Uther held her close. "I am glad you came and I would rather know. You were a close friend to both Ygraine and I. Gaius may be able to find a cure – "

"Gaius knows the truth."

"Ygraine would have wanted you to stay. Of all our friends, we are all that's left. You deserve a friend by your side. Let me be there for you."

"Uther – "

"At least consider it."

She sighed and watched the sky before answering. "I will."

Uther may seem OOC, but I am naive and like to find the best in everyone. Also, Ygraine must have loved something about him, right?

As always, please comment with your thoughts. I love hearing from you. Next chapter should come in about 10 days. That's the deadline I'm setting for myself.