~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~CHAPTER 6~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I started to find poetry very attractive. Alther would find me books of poems and I would read them whenever I had the time. So much that I wrote my own poems. Septimus found my poems disturbing and I told him that I wrote whatever came to my mind, so that's that. One of my poems went like this: "Could anything be more different? It's like a whole different world, morphed from the remnants of the one I last knew. It's amazing. Indescribable. Dangerous, for any human being. Here, time is nothing. Memories are nothing. Love is nothing. Death is nothing. One big part of it though… Terrifying but true. Life is NOTHING. Haha! Everything is nothing, nothing is nothing. Could anything be more different? Could anything be more different?" Everyone whom I showed it to said it was creepy, and if I wanted to keep writing things like this I should work at Gothyk Grotto. It made me start thinking. Am I really that different? Just because I'm, well, insane? At times, I would be transported back to that nightmarish pyramid, but when that happened, I didn't laugh. I wouldn't laugh. When I went to the Charm Chamber, the Charm Wizard would make sure that I was at least five feet away from her, because, I don't want to say it, but Rose has a big mouth. Not when she's awake, but when she's asleep. The Ordinary Wizards also do the same, but instead of five feet, it's two feet. This made me feel a little better but not enough to cover up my shame. I talked to Septimus about all this over a cup of coffee. "They are small-minded people," he said as he took a sip. "You shouldn't care what they think. Don't our thoughts of you matter more?" He took another sip. "I hate it when people say that," I told him, as I gulped down my coffee. "Don't you understand that it still hurts? That even if I try not to think about them, I do? That if I try not to care, I will? It still hurts. Don't you get that?" I looked down at my empty cup of coffee. "Remember when Simon said he wished you were dead when the Matron Midwife took you away? That you were just a Young Army brat? You cared, didn't you? It hurt, right?"

"Yes, it did. But it also told me that he accepted me."

"How?"

"He sensed my air. He said something bad about me after a long time so he could cover up his air. And then he ran away. Know why?"

"Why?"

"He didn't want me to see his approval. So he kept on his dirty face and galloped off on Thunder. You heard his apology. He said that he did love me. That what he did was a mistake."

"But he hated you in the beginning. And this is my beginning."

"Exactly. Give it time and it will subside. Care for a macaron?"

I took the macaron. It occured to me that since my birthday, I had not thought of my want of someone to love me. I wanted that again. I really was annoyed. I broke my streak and I had to think about it now? I disappointed myself. I wanted love from someone even more than I did before. I wanted it more than I could tell. I sighed and walked away. I had to study for my Prediction Practical. As I sat in my desk, I watched Spit Fyre flying over the Dragon Kennel, which was in construction and being built with very thick iron, so Spit Fyre couldn't break it. I wished I was Spit Fyre. No worries, no conscience, flying, you can't understand what people say, you don't have mental problems, flying… Life is simple when you're a dragon. I focused my thoughts back on my Prediction Practical. After about five hours of studying, I read my poem. I suppose it was disturbing. I got my pen and my notebook to write down a sequel to it.

"Truth is revealed in this world. Truth is terrifying in this world. Truth is the only thing in this world. However… Truth is nothing in this world, Truth is everything in this world. Haha! Too complicated for us to understand. What is this? Truly amazing. Perhaps it is not so bad after all. What we see are lies. This is truth. IT is truth. Could anything be more different?"

I reread it. It might be confusing to other people but it made perfect sense to me. It felt right. I made a note to myself to show Alther. He was the only one who appreciated my poems. Alther flew in at that moment. Perfect timing, I thought as he sat, or more floated, beside me. "Do you have a new poem, Sierra?"

"In fact, Alther, I just made one. Please read it." I waited a few minutes as he looked over my shoulder and read every word of it. "Mmm, very interesting. I trust this to be a sequel of your previous one?" I nodded. "Ah, I see. Sierra, there is a lot of truth in this. A lot of the things you write make a lot of sense, and they tell exactly what reality is. You really should make more of these."

"Oh, Alther, I showed my poems to quite a few people but they said they were creepy and disturbing. That if I write poems like that I should work at Gothyk Grotto instead of sitting here being a fancy Apprentice."

"They are small-minded people."

"That's what Sep said."

We sat there for a while, silent. Alther spoke up. "I believe it is well past your bedtime. And, for the record, I love your poems. They are the best things I ever read in my Living Time and here, as a Ghost." I smiled. I loved Alther. He was like a father to me. Soon, the ghost floating next to me floated away, out the window. I watched him to a few somersaults before flying upright, balancing on the square on the top of the golden Pyramid.

The next day I was writing another poem while walking on Wizard Way, but the gale picked up my paper and blew it away. I walked past Gothyk Grotto where JoJo Heap, Septimus's idiot brother, took notice of me and threw an empty bottle at me. Or I thought it was empty. He had missed and it was rolling down the street. I picked it up and took out the cork. Inside was a paper. I unrolled it and inside in capitals read, "FREAK! IT'S A GOOD THING YOUR PARENTS DIED CAUSE THEY DON'T HAVE TO DEAL WITH YOU, INSANE RETARD!" I tensed up. No one knew about my parents. No one. JoJo and his friends must have seen me shaking because they said (excluding JoJo, because he remained silent), "Crybaby! I'm Sierra and I'm crying because of a little letter! Wah, wah, wah! Oh, look at me! I'm such a sad orphan!" I turned on my heel and stared at them. Hard. In an instant, all their knees started bleeding, minus JoJo's because I think he walked away because he didn't want to make fun of me. His friends grabbed their legs and dropped to the ground. "Look who's crying now," I muttered as I walked away. "FREAK!" one of them shouted at me as he lay sprawled on the floor.