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Ciel's bedroom door was closed when Sebastian walked by.

He wanted, more than anything, to throw it in and wrap his arms around the young man, the beautiful white rose.

Instead, his head lowered dejectedly, and leaned against the closed door.

He could hear Ciel breathing, through the wood, breathing and shuffling through his wardrobe.

The boy had lived in the lap of luxury his whole life through; Sebastian was honestly surprised Ciel even knew how to button his own shirts, but Ciel had never had a personal caretaker.

Well, never one specifically designated to him.

"I know it's you, Sebastian."

Ciel murmured through the wood. "You may come in."

Sebastian debated it. Ciel had already managed to take up so much of his attention that he couldn't hear Vincent coming once. He didn't want to risk a second time.

Ciel sighed, disappointed, and there was a slight creak as he sat down.

Sebastian opened the door.

Ciel was seated in a chair pushed up near the window, straightening the collar of a dry shirt as he closed the last button.

He didn't look at Sebastian as he tugged on a dry vest, a dark blue. The red one, along with its jacket, were folded on the vanity, creating a puddle on the surface.

Sebastian glanced around the room quickly. It had been several years since he had actually been inside. Even though Ciel slept remarkably late, he always managed to be ready right when he was needed.

Not much had changed; the vanity that used to stand between the wardrobe and the door had been replaced with a taller one, Ciel's bed had been replaced with a wider one, the canopy over it now white, once blue, and several of the shelves that used to be beyond Ciel's reach were since laden with books and trinkets.

And, clearly, the toy box had been replaced with a chair that looked out the west window, over the side of the mansion, a table next to it also stacked high with books.

Ciel stood slowly, brushing his still-damp hair back. He looked more attractive than before, somehow, his bangs kept away from his face.

He crossed his arms slowly, and placed his weight on one hip.

"That was my fault." Ciel said quietly. "I should've known better."

Still not looking at Sebastian, he lifted a hand to his mouth. "I'm sorry." He murmured through his fingers.

Sebastian could hardly fathom how human words were supposed to articulate any emotion more complex than glad or upset, and could never come close to what he was trying to comprehend within himself.

"Absolutely none of that was your fault, Ciel." Sebastian finally managed, settling on comforting Ciel rather than trying to describe his own mental state. "I knew - I know - full well that I'm taking advantage of you."

That, apparently, was not the right thing to say. Ciel's eyes finally met Sebastian's, piercing him darkly.

"Don't pretend, Sebastian. I am more than capable of knowing what I want. You know as well as I do exactly what I wanted."

Sebastian swallowed.

But I wanted that, too. I never want anything good.

"It hardly matters. Your father did exactly what he should have." Sebastian tried. "I'm sure you know as well as he does what kind of jeopardy your future would be in."

Ciel snarled, suddenly, a sound Sebastian had never heard a human make that gave him chills. It was a dark and almost cruel sound, totally careless.

"Of course I know, I know as well as you do. But, just like you-" Ciel stepped closer, and Sebastian, unreasonably intimidated, stepped back. "-I don't care."

Sebastian considered, briefly, fleeing. Ciel must have seen it in him somehow, for he smiled softly. "Don't tell me you still think I don't know you? Not by now?"

"You couldn't possibly know me for what I am." Sebastian defended, and realized that Ciel's arms were never crossed-he was hugging himself.

"I know all I need to."

Sebastian wanted to laugh, to tell him no, you're a human, you could never possibly even begin to comprehend me, not what I am nor what I want, but as Ciel stared him down fearlessly, utterly inhuman and terrifyingly human, he somehow believed him.

"Then you know how much danger I no doubt would get you into." Sebastian tried. He has a life, he deserves to live it, you're already taking his father, just let him live.

Ciel laughed and traced his side.

"You can't possibly be any more dangerous than the truly desperate of humanity."

Sebastian chuckled at that.

"You really are quite an interesting human, Ciel Phantomhive."

"And you're a very humane demon," Ciel smiled, stepping closer. "Sebastian."

Ciel extended his hand.

"You know I can't touch you." Sebastian said soberly. Ciel reached out further, taking Sebastian's hand and tugging the wet glove off it.

"You don't have to." Ciel purred cleverly.

He tangled his fingers into Sebastian's, but Sebastian's hand remained stiff, fingers not curling around Ciel's small palm. He couldn't touch him, after all.

"Honestly, my Father really only has control over you. I can do just about whatever I want." Ciel told Sebastian, pulling him closer.

He reached up and closed his other hand around Sebastian's neck, pulling just enough that Sebastian stooped in, and Ciel leaned up and pressed a kiss to Sebastian's mouth.

Sebastian remained unmoving. How horrible it must have been, for Ciel, to kiss something that did not move, that was unforgiving, as cold and cruel as Sebastian's inability to touch Ciel back. It must have been like holding a statue, Sebastian thought, and Ciel drew away after only a chaste second, releasing Sebastian's neck and hand. Sebastian did not resist, did not push him away.

He smiled sweetly, minutely, but his eyes were dull, faded.

"You don't have to say anything." Ciel cut Sebastian off before he had the chance to actually speak.

Ciel wrapped his arms around himself, turning away. He was still holding Sebastian's glove, and he looked down at it. He began to laugh, weakly.

"It was idiotic of me, wasn't it? Childish, even,"

Ciel laughed horribly, shaking. His hand closed into a fist, and he drew it towards his shoulder.

"You're a demon! Just because you looked human...you...I clung to you because you took up the space my mother left, you…"

Ciel gave a sob, and his legs shuddered.

"No." Ciel croaked. "It was my own fault."

He shuddered again, breathing deeply.

"It's just in your nature to be what you have been, isn't it?"

Ciel turned again.

Sebastian didn't try to wipe away the tear on his own cheek. He smiled placidly.

"You truly are too clever for your own good. You've made me too human for much of anything."

Ciel laughed weakly.

"I haven't done anything. You just say that because your nature is to seduce, and manipulate, isn't it?"

Sebastian laughed, watery.

"If I could still call myself a demon of true nature, would I be crying right now?"

Ciel sniffled and shuffled closer. He pressed his head against Sebastian's chest and closed his eyes, much like a cat.

He seemed almost as if he was about to fall asleep, droplets of water in his long lashes, when he smiled slowly.

"You have a heartbeat, Sebastian."

He murmured softly.