a/n: in celebration of the new frozen short trailer, here is another chapter!
Anna didn't understand why she was having second thoughts already. Maybe she just didn't understand her own thoughts enough. Or maybe I'm just having them. It was that simple. But simplicity just wasn't good enough.
It hadn't even been a few minutes since Anna came back to bed before she was already getting a bad feeling about… whatever that confession was.
She was supposed to be happy. Oh, but how was she supposed to be when she was still wondering what they fuck they were? No, Anna still didn't understand-didn't trust her own guts one fucking bit.
After all, how could she believe that they would click together this quickly?
She scoffed at herself. Why would I, when I had fallen in love with someone I'm not supposed to? Twice, even.
Anna wasn't going allow her feelings get ahead of her-though, her heart had said otherwise. But as if Anna would listen to her heart anyway. And Anna was reluctant to follow what her heart desired.
"Anna." The door slowly creaked open.
Anna was lying in bed, curled on her side. She watched the woman slowly come up to her with a bowl of soup, blue eyes watching her with care. She refrained from glaring at the woman. The woman who actually cared for her. She doesn't deserve my anger.
But Anna had her doubts.
It was silent between the two, and Anna found herself basking in it.
Her hair was splayed over the pillow, arms and legs hugging the comforter tightly, her chin buried and only half her face visible. Her expression… a blanket of nothingness. Anna didn't know what she was feeling. What she was going to say. After all, that confession was nothing that Anna could take in so quickly and easily.
With a few thoughts crossing her mind, well… she wasn't so sure anymore-whether she was selfish to accept that love so quickly… so stupidly in love. She couldn't help thinking about the little things.
"Do you feel okay?"
Anna nodded timidly.
The blonde sat down on her chair by the bed, laying the hot bowl on the nightstand. "Should I feed you?"
Hm.
Anna looked away, her gaze focusing on Elsa's lap. She was acting like a child, and Elsa… clearly had to mother her. Fuck.
So her mother knew Elsa now-what they were. Maybe. Even Anna still wasn't sure about their relationship, even if they'd confessed their love for each other.
She felt the woman run her fingers through her hair, pushing strands of hair behind her ear. "Don't make this harder. Talk to me," she whispered. Does she really care?
Anna shrugged. "What is there to talk about?" What can go more wrong than before? Because for a moment… back there, it felt so right. Too right.
"What are you thinking?" Elsa breathed, and somehow, Anna felt a sense of demand in her softened voice. Control. Anna clenched her jaw tightly together.
"A lot of things that you wouldn't understand."
Elsa's eyes softened. Oh, through understanding perhaps? "Have I never tried not to understand you?" she breathed in question.
Anna was staying in her place. "I don't try to understand you. I don't think you should try that hard either." Maybe Elsa was in shock to see her talking back because now, she'd gone all quiet. It was so unlike them… No, this was all too familiar. To be quiet… looking at each other as if to try to understand each other. To feel each other's presence on each other, because they were enough, alone together. I shouldn't think this.
She sighed to herself. "Look, I didn't want my mother to know about… about us." The mumble was supposed to be for herself. Cold knuckles ran down her cheek, and Anna… just couldn't bear finding this more comfortable than it should've been. Because it was. She held the woman's wrist. "I mean, I don't want her to worry about… what I've been doing."
Elsa cocked her head to one side. "Am I making things more difficult for you?"
"Yes." The redhead sat up, huffing an angry breath. But she knew Elsa was never easily swayed. The woman just kept smiling! Gods, was it irritating.
Though… a part of Anna knew she couldn't stay resentful forever. She was a grown woman. She had the right to love someone… and Elsa as well. But not like this. Not with a job that was so… consuming. So dirty. Where's all my innocence?
Her grip loosened, and Anna let her anger go. "I… I'm sorry, I just… I didn't want her to know because…well, look at me. I'm a whore. I'm not worth the trouble." She chuckled bitterly, eyes on her lap.
"I am looking."
Oh.
Those blue eyes were so soft… so bright, Anna thought she could swim through it like a mass of ocean water. Like clouds floating through the sky. Never had Anna seen such a serene expression. Never had she been this comforted through softly spoken words.
She bit her lip. "I-I-"
Elsa ran her fingers through her hair, "You must think… perhaps, everything that I've said was… a bluff. I've told you everything that my heart desired to say…" She gazed straight into her eyes, and Anna could feel herself being her captive. "My conversation with your mother was brief. I wouldn't dwell on it. Would you like me to speak to her?" Now that's too much. THIS has been too much.
Anna shook her head. "That's… I just don't want her to worry."
"You've said that already."
"I just hope you understand where I'm coming from, that's all."
"You must be a wonderful daughter." Elsa sighed again, words whispering as if she was talking to herself. It just… sounded off. Cold and empty. No, perhaps, it was envy. But Elsa showed none of this from her expression. She looked… distant, no matter how soft her eyes were. "But even I know we… don't feel confident about what we have. We've agreed to this before-taking our time, that is."
Anna couldn't deny that she was right. Whatever they were having-going to have, it wasn't within arms reach. She let her fingers entwine, her thumbs encircling each other.
Perhaps, it just made things a bit more complicated with their confessions out of the way. Anna almost regretted pushing Elsa to confess her love. "I guess… I mean…" She huffed. "My mother has known about me being interested in someone. I-It's just… it's just not you."
Elsa leaned against her chair, arms crossed. Seems like she's listening quite well.
"She thinks I'm dating a boy. Well, thought… before you… told her, you know… that it was you."
The woman let out an amused chuckle. "I see."
The redhead shook her head. "I don't want her to know more about it. U-Until I'm ready, that is." Silence. But did she really get it? Anna wasn't so sure, with Elsa just glancing at her like that. So blankly and expressionless… so observant. Her heart pounded, and Anna could barely keep her eyes on her. Not that she didn't want to. She cleared her throat, her cheeks flushing pink, but Anna wasn't sure why.
The way Elsa just… looked at her, all seemed so familiar. It's like I'm just a little prize to her.
She heard a deep intake of breath. "You should eat. I'll go get your medicine."
The woman got up and closed the door before going downstairs. That's strange. A part of Anna wanted to believe that Elsa was avoiding her again. But if she wanted to, Anna would avoid her too.
She sighed, reluctantly eating a few spoonfuls of soup. She'd almost forgotten that Elsa had paid for the debt that she owned Meg. Still doing it. Anna never understood why-or it could be as simple as she was just wealthy and needed a place to spend her money because she had all that she wanted. Elsa must've had a great life. But a great life isn't all about wealth.
She remembered Elsa telling her how distant she was with her family. Perhaps… the way Elsa was now, was because of their influence. Ah, but Anna wondered. Would she have acted differently with a better father? Gods, who were she to judge?
Elsa came in with a glass of water and two capsule pills. "Finish eating first before taking this."
Anna stared at the pills. "I should give you back the checks."
Her eyebrows rose. "Checks?"
"I owe you."
The woman put the glass of water down, the pills put beside it. "Have you forgotten? You are confusing owing with giving."
I can't let this happen again. "No, but I think it's best if I repay you. I mean… what the hell am I going to do with 8K?"
"Use it for yourself. But I do not want it. I haven't finished paying your debt yet." The woman crossed her arms, and silence ensued between the two women. Anna didn't know what to do. Sometimes, Elsa could just act so… childish for a person that was so responsible and mature. But if Elsa didn't want it… there was nothing else she could do. She sighed, knowing Elsa didn't have the will to accept any of her money.
Elsa was wealthy, of course… she probably has more right now than Anna could possible make doing..what she did. "Then I should ask you this… why are you giving?" She questioned. Though, she knew, Elsa… wasn't as cold as she thought she was.
Despite what people thought of her-how Elsa would act, she was the kindest person Anna could ever meet.
She stared at the woman, then down on her lap, letting her hands clasp together. "Why do I give…" Elsa repeated. "Because I've had everything that I needed. You just gave me a reason."
Anna wasn't sure what to make out of that. She could've done everything, including donating millions to those in need… but Anna was her first choice. From the very beginning, they had set their eyes on each other… and Elsa had given everything that she needed in a blink of an eye. Whether she was grateful or resentful, she wasn't sure.
She allowed the silence to press on because there was just… nothing to be said. Anna continued to eat.
"Perhaps, after this, you might want to call your mother."
"I know." She stirred her soup lazily. "I'll go home after this."
"Will you work today?"
Anna shook her head. "No work today. Thursday, however…" She trailed off, clearing her throat. "I mean, obviously, I'll be there."
"Of course." For a second, Anna thought she saw a glimmer of light in her eyes. Like Elsa was… looking forward to the night. Of course, she would. Anna expected nothing less.
She didn't understand why she was feeling nervous about Thursday. Elsa would be there as well… but ah, things were changing with their feelings so open. While Elsa hadn't finished paying her off, neither did Anna want to stop working to try to repay her back as well. Oh, it was an endless cycle.
She'd realize the stubbornness they both had for each other. Pursing her lips together, her expression grew grim. She stared down at her bowl of soup. "You know… I've never wanted to become an escort in the first place, not because I found it disgusting."
"I know why."
No, not at all. Anna didn't think so. The redhead continued, regardless, "I stopped for five months because… because I was betrayed by my own feelings. I thought… I had something special with her, but apparently, that just wasn't the case." She chuckled, but she wasn't sure if she was feeling resentful towards Meg or herself anymore. "I shouldn't have let my feelings control me back then…"
Honestly, whatever Anna had felt towards Meg was childish. Selfish. And she should've kept all that to herself, knowing that it really was against the rules. Ah, this was deja vu.
"I'm scared," she breathed. "I'm scared of what we will become… what we will mean to each other."
"We'll see."
Anna was confused, eyeing her with hurt. "I-Is that all you have to say?"
The woman took a deep breath, getting up to sit on the bed beside her. Her thin fingers fell on top of hers, and she watched blue eyes falling to their entwined fingers. It glowed ever so beautifully… so brightly through the sunlight seeping into the room. Anna… gazed into it like she was staring out into the open sea, and it was just so… incredibly warm despite the harsh winter.
It was quiet for a while. Anna could get to used to this comforting silence.
"What can I say? What do you want me to say?" Their eyes met, longing… and Anna could just taste it from the tip of her tongue. Could taste the desire they had for each other… and it was just so close. They were so close. Elsa was right-they didn't need to plan, they just had to go with… whatever they had. And whatever that was going happen, she was going to deal with it.
She pursed her lips together, whispering, "Maybe I am still scared that you would-"
"I won't." A pause. She heard a soft sigh. "Yes, I will admit, that I've never had the will to commit. But you won't see her in me." I'll be the judge of that.
She shouldn't have to worry so much in the first place. Elsa had confessed. She had CONFESSED. That was all that mattered at the moment.
She smiled softly, blushing when she felt a finger bringing loose strands of hair behind her ear. "Yeah… I guess I'm overreacting a bit. No wonder I got sick."
The woman's eyes were warm. For once. "I won't have you worry."
"With you, I won't?"
"Not at all." Anna wished this silence was as comforting as Elsa's hand on hers. Somehow, she still felt restless, but not for the same reason she was sick. Her restlessness had excited her-that she couldn't wait until Thursday.
Gosh, I'm insane. But this wasn't the first time she'd looked forward to such a horrible day. Every other thought had been pushed aside just for this. She embraced that exhilarating feeling, and every doubt that she had, had been overcome with the pounding of her heart. Obviously, she could never just ignore it.
She continued eating, and in the corner of her eyes, Elsa had brought out a small smile.
"I've got something to ask you now." The blonde shifted in her seat, her arms and legs crossed together. She let her loosened hair fall over her shoulder and golden strands over her eyes as she tilted her head. The sun shined beautifully on her.
Anna blinked in curiosity. "Y-Yeah?"
"Would you like it if I asked you to come to a party with me?"
Anna nearly choked. "W-What? You mean, like a date? I thought we were going to-"
The woman lifted a finger up to silence her. "Well, you could see this as one; however, this is for my father's birthday. I want you there with me."
Anna imagined this party to be all fancy and sparkly… which she was nothing of. The only fancy thing she could get with was her dancing and Elsa. She nearly laughed to herself at the thought. Fancy Elsa, huh? Oh, she could imagine it.
A red long dress showing all her figure, letting her hair flow down her bare back… wow.
She cleared her head and her throat. "W-Well, when?"
"Next month. Dress nicely, will you?" Shit. Now she had more things to worry about-and trying to dress nicely was something Anna dreaded. Besides being a girl who would wear jeans and t-shirts all the time… she had nothing else. Oh, well… it was going to be another month until then.
"I… I don't have anything nice to wear."
The woman's expression lit up, a smirk crossing her face. "I've got you covered."
Anna nervously chuckled. "What, are you going to spend like ten thousand dollars for one night of partying with me? All the dresses, make up, and-"
"Now that you've mentioned it, I might. Don't worry." Oh, now I'm really worrying, Elsa Arendelle.
Sometimes, Elsa just laughing could be so refreshing. Now just wasn't the time. Anna crossed her arms, her eyebrows furrowing to a frown. "I hate it when you always joke like that."
"Did you really think I was joking?" The blonde leaned in, arms resting on her knees. Although, she had this smile on… something was just ever so menacing. Ever so intimidating. Anna was completely speechless. Frozen. For once, Anna realized that she just… she was goddamn serious.
"You're serious."
Elsa arched an eyebrow up. "Have I given you the wrong impression of me? Am I not to be taken seriously?"
"Y-Yeah… I don't know." She shrugged. A part of her was just… a bit concerned about what would happen at the party. She was the odd woman out - a 21-year-old woman who worked at a strip club for almost a year now, with experiences that nobody could ever imagine being in. What the hell was she going to do at a party that was this sophisticated?
She felt a hand patting her head. "You seem nervous. I don't bite." A pause. "Well, most of the time." She smirked, prompting Anna to groan.
Damn it.
"So what do you think?"
Anna just wanted to curl back into her comforter. "W-What?"
"Would you accompany me?"
She said yes like it was nothing. She couldn't believe it. Though, it wasn't as if she could resist saying no. Who could even resist with Elsa just staring at her like she had control of her? Like a goddamn puppet!
Anna huffed to herself, staring at the clothes that Elsa had given back to her, laid on the bed. Elsa was in her room, changing as well.
But even without Elsa here, Anna still couldn't say much. It was her own will, her own doing to make Elsa confess, and say yes to a party where she knew she didn't belong.
Stupid.
This is so stupid. I'M stupid.
She threw her head back, groaning in frustration. Anns always knew Elsa could get so fucking frustrating sometimes, she didn't know Elsa was also this… ugh, she didn't even care anymore.
And with the frustration balled up inside her, she quickly got dressed. With a frown on her face.
Oh, but Anna couldn't stay mad forever.
She knocked on Elsa's door once she came out. Oh, and here comes the surge of nervousness. Anna shouldn't have to feel such a way.
"Come in."
Anna pushed the door open, finding the blonde buttoning up her collar, a loose tie around her neck. She stared at her up and down.
She'd probably seen her wear these type of clothes a million times around. Though, she could never get used to it.
"Intrigued?"
Anna blinked from her daze. Elsa was staring back at her from her reflection, her arms crossed together. Intrigued? No, just… in awe.
She cleared her throat. "Y-You ready?"
"Come here."
Anna strode towards her, her fingers pulled in a fist. "W-What?"
"Fix my tie, will you?" Elsa turned around, pushing her braid off her shoulder.
Couldn't just do it herself?
Anna was frozen in her spot, and already, her heart was racing to oblivion.Why is she staring at me like that?
To her surprise, her hands were already touching her black tie. She didn't dare break eye contact… didn't dare to break away from what she would do to her. Elsa just stared, smiling, like she knew Anna would react this way.
It was quiet between them, and Anna allowed herself to come back to reality. From this… love sick reality. Slowly, she let her shaky fingers work her tie-
Elsa grabbed her wrist, thumbing her pulse. "Tell me, what are you thinking right now?"
Even if she asks me that…In silence, Anna continued to work her tie around her neck. But did Elsa care as much as she thought? Of course, Elsa did care… just… cared differently.
She tightened the tie around her, and without a beat… kiss.
Elsa was so still… her fingers slipping away from her grip. Oh, she was melting - her eyes closed, hands placed on Elsa's cheeks. Her heart was pounding, and once again, it wasn't that horrible feeling that left her heart begging for Anna to get away. This was an encouragement.
Her face was flushed pink, but she didn't mind being so shy… she didn't mind this at all. I'm in love.
When she pulled away, Anna was breathless, her teal eyes gazing blankly at Elsa. The blonde brushed her fingers through her copper hair.
"That was some answer," she whispered, a smile gracing her lips. Blue eyes gazed into hers softly, trailing down to the lips that once kissed her.
Anna flushed in silence, pulling her tie tight around her neck. "I… I couldn't help it." She leaned into her palm, prompting Elsa to tilt her head with amusement.
Elsa's smile widened, and she let her fingers lift Anna's chin up. "I've always thought… as bold as you always seem whenever it is Thursday… you blush quite a bit whenever it isn't."
Anna couldn't look at her in the eye. She always knew Thursday was the night where she had to… put up an act. Oh. Is this… an act too? The redhead held her wrist. "Well, I think…" This is too intense? Am I too vulnerable? "I-I think you just… we just open ourselves more when it isn't Thursday."
"I see." With a slight pause, Elsa pecked her lips once more, sending her heart into a spiral once again. Sending Anna in a daze once again… and she let that kiss - her touch - linger on her lips "We should go soon. I promised I'd get breakfast with Olaf."
"Y-Yeah, um… before that," Anna sighed, allowing herself to back away, "I, uh… I have something to tell you. I've completely forgotten about it."
"What is it?"
She'd thought about her father more than once already. Insecure, Anna pressed her arms around her abdomen. Gods, did she want to tell her about her father-how badly she wanted Elsa to comfort her because… well, because Elsa would understand. She'd went through a similar situation-and it was just situation Anna never really understood or sympathized with until now. Now… she just wanted a father of her own-a family.
Elsa crossed her arms in silence, her eyes wide and clear. Throughout this quietness, Elsa finally furrowed her brows in realization. "Tell me, don't keep it in."
Oddly, Anna felt herself shake at the thought of telling her. Had she ever told Elsa that part of her life-the part where Anna never had a father? She was scared of the thought of never actually finding her father. Oh, but for once, Anna believed that she could. I mean… wasn't that guy, him? "Well, I... I don't think we're that different."
The blonde hummed. "What made you come up with that thought?"
Anna took a deep, shaky breath. "You know, I'm… not wealthy like you, and here you are… supporting me." She chuckled. "I've never really had a family, you know? Not like yours at least."
Elsa grumbled slightly, "What we have… family-wise is not up for comparison."
Anna nodded, and something just… made her laugh. Oh, she wanted to laugh. She yearned for a family-and she had one. Recently, this family she had was quite… unfulfilling. No matter how much Anna loved Andrew and Martha, that love seemed to just drown in a pool of nothingness. That perhaps, her love meant nothing without the truth.
"Yeah, I know." She wrung her fingers together. "But, at least, you have a father that loves you. A father that… I would never have."
Elsa's fingers twitched. "You…"
"Recently, I just… I met him. Well, not met him, but like… it turns out when I believed for my entire life that he was dead, he's not. I saw his picture." She almost noticed Elsa flinch at her words. Like, it just… hurt her personally to see that someone like Anna would be so… similar to Elsa. But the woman stayed still as a rock. Listening. Giving all the attention that was needed while staying as far away as possible.
Ah, but perhaps, that was just what Anna needed. Someone to care for her… yet, leaving her secrets aside. Knowing where the line stood. Right now, that line stood between them. Perhaps, that's how it should be.
Oh, but maybe, this was too much. Anna scoffed. "Actually, nevermind, I shouldn't talk so much about-"
"No, keep talking."
"You'll be late for work."
Elsa rolled her sleeve to look at her watch. "Don't worry about that. Talk to me."
"What is there to know about?"
"Whatever your heart desires." That again. Anna never wanted to hear about what her heart desired anymore. No, she just… never understood what her heart wanted anyway.
She sighed. "I'll just… it's nothing. Really. We should go." Anna felt distrustful. No, she was becoming stubborn once again. Not because it was Elsa she was telling this to-she knew Elsa was someone she could trust the most… but perhaps, she also just didn't trust herself.
Elsa gazed at her emptily, and Anna knew, she wanted to say something. Bring her to the point that Anna had opened up everything to her. The woman closed her eyes, heaving out a disheartening sigh. "Yes, we should go."
What am I going to tell her?
It'd been a week since she felt this surreal… since she felt her heart pounding like drumbeats. She'd never felt so much in heaven, allowing her body to relax on cloud nine. It was a paradise to be close to her… to hold her hand… to just
touch. To just feel her breath against me.
Because it was Thursday. It was Thursday… but never had she felt such a rush. Never had she had this much fun with Elsa.
She laughed ever so playfully. Kissed her with love. Ran her fingers through her golden strands with pleasure. And she let herself close her eyes and submit to this… this thrill.
The thrill that made her whole-the thrill that she kept lusting over. And she would sigh into the heavens… because under the night sky, Anna felt free in her chains.
Elsa had kept her warm in the cold, cold night… with kisses she begged for, with the touch of her skin she had an addiction for, the voices that kept her in peace…
Anna just… felt everything. Alive.
Loved.
But coming back home the morning after, Anna would be confronted with the same question and the same glare. She was almost surprised her mother wasn't going out of her way to find out what the hell she had been doing.
Especially when Anna had always kept her… things under her bed, or at work.
She stared at the front door. It was just 8AM when Elsa had brought her home, but not before a set of breakfast. Anna hadn't had such a big appetite in a while - she swore she'd lost too much weight, worrying too much. Elsa had somehow forced her to eat. Fed her too.
This… was a first.
Sighing, she unlocked the door. She peered into the empty living room… and the only thing that was making any noise was the television. "Mom?" she called out, closing the door behind her. She dumped her bag down on the couch, fingers running through her hair. "Mom, I'm home!"
"In here, honey!" Ah, the kitchen. Anna was about to grab a drink anyway.
Martha was on her phone once again, her back turned to Anna as she looked out the window. It must've been quite a serious conversation. Anna couldn't hear it. Whatever. She grabbed a bottle of water from the fridge, leaning against the wall as she waited for her to get off the phone.
Well… waiting for her mother to lecture her about coming home late, blah, blah, blah.
She took a sip of her water.
Martha sighed, "Yes… Adgar, please… Don't make me think about what happened ever again… it's not worth it… goodbye." She laid her phone on the counter, turning to see identical teal eyes staring back at her. "So..." Anna was prepared-she arched her eyebrow. Oddly… Martha seemed to be in quite a… not-so-angry mood. The redhead feared what was about to come. "Where have you been?"
Here we go.
Anna looked away, wrapping her hand around her neck. The older woman didn't need to see the bruises. "I…"
"Oh, I see. With your girlfriend." Fuck. That was right. Or not.
Ugh, I don't even know anymore.
Her cheeks grew pink, and with a slight hesitation, she turned back to her mother with uncertainty. "L-Look, it's not what you think it is-w-we're not… you know, just…"
"I get it, I get it! You youngsters… really," Martha chuckled, seating herself down on a chair. "You don't have to explain it to me-that girl you're into was quite nice the other day."
God fucking damn it.
"I want to talk to her again."
Now she really wanted to consider calling Elsa and yell at her. She shouldn't have taken that phone call.
"Mom, I told you… ugh!" She pressed her hand against her forehead. "You know what, I don't think making any excuses would get us anywhere."
"Nope, not at all. So, when are you going to bring her home?"
"When are you going to tell me to come home early?"
"Nah, I know where you'll be going. Who you're with. I'm not worried."
"You talked to her once, and you're this trusting already?"
"I trust that she brings you home fresh and happy." Now, that really was a first. Not that it really relieved Anna that… she was actually free. Over the last week Anna never got a moment's rest from her mother's probing about Elsa.
Yes, it'd been a week, and the two had yet to become… something else. Oh, but Anna did badly want that something else. Just… not now. She gazed at the ground, her arms crossed. And everything about her expression was just… dark. All the thoughts she had held back were fully revealed.
Her mother noticed, letting her fingers entwine together. The silence between them was… somewhat comforting for a while. "You know… if there's anything you want to tell me about you and… her, I'm all ears. I won't judge you, and you know, I will never."
Anna bit her lip, running a finger to push a strand of loose hair behind her ear. "I know. I just… thing is, I never really wanted you to know about her this fast until I was ready. And you just called me the other night… and she answered, and I just-"
"I get it, you're scared. It's okay. I don't know more about her other than the fact that you just love her. A lot. I don't know her name, what she looks like, why she's dating a little brat of a daughter like you," she chuckled, prompting Anna to stretch her lips to a smile. "You don't have to tell me everything. Not now, that is."
Anna shook her head groaning. "God, I… ugh, I really do want to tell you everything about her… how I met her, and… I can't. I just can't right now. B-But you'll like her when that time comes. I swear."
As if I'm dating her right now.
"I know I will, honey."
Right now, she wasn't sure what the hell she was saying. She glared at her own feet. Her mother seemed a tad bit too happy about… someone that she'd never met. A lover… no. Just… someone.
Perhaps, Anna just felt guilty. Oh, there was always going to be this guilt anyway. Yes, Elsa was kind and… someone Anna loved to be with, but she wasn't the problem. Never was. It's just... how am I going to tell her that I work as a stripper? Oh, maybe she shouldn't have hidden it in the first place. But as if that would make things easier. Anna felt quite flustered.
"So-"
"May I ask you a question… that you don't have to answer right now?"
Anna blinked, eyes on Martha… and only to see her expression darken grimly. For a moment, Anna felt shivers traveling down her spine. Uh oh. This was going to be trouble. "Y-Yeah, what is it?"
Her mother took a deep breath. "I know this is sudden, but I've been thinking about this the whole day now, but… would you like to meet your father?"
What?
"What?"
"You'll be her escort for the time being."
"A-Are you kidding me?"
"No. I'll bring you guys the contracts." Seriously?
Anna didn't understand. Okay, well… she did, but she didn't understand why Hans would specifically call her in… with that woman by his side. She was already nervous-sweating enough from that dance earlier.
Outside, it was still loud with customers yelling and shouting, the music booming into their ears. The clock ticked and Anna's heart continued to beat with haste. It was just too loud here. But Anna heard it all. Hans wanted her to be Meg's escort. Though, a part of her wondered… perhaps, the woman before her would be the same as any of the other clients she had.
She crossed her arms, glancing to and fro from Hans' nasty smirk, and Meg. She was so still, a small smile reaching her cheeks. Her arms were crossed and she leaned against the wall so relaxed and free. Anna turned away. She didn't need to get caught up with these emotions right now.
"I… why me?" she questioned Hans.
"Hm, you shouldn't be asking me. I mean, technically, this is your job, and I am your boss. You'll do what I say right?" He chuckled. A small folder of contracts hit the table.
The fire that engulfed Anna inside was bursting. She never knew Hans could be this obnoxious.
Anna sighed in submission. "Yeah, right. Just…" She turned to Meg. "Hans will give us the contract later."
Meg tilted her head. "Your name is Anna, correct?"
"Yeah."
The brunette nodded, strolling towards her. "We should go grab a drink while we talk, is that okay?"
Normally, Anna wouldn't, but… if it was her, then this would be an exception. After all, Anna never felt so… threatened by her feelings. Hesitantly, Anna looked behind the woman's shoulder to see Hans shrugging at her.
She rolled her eyes.
I can't believe this… "Yeah… uh, just let me get dressed. Do you… Do you want to come?" She didn't mean to ask that. She most definitely didn't mean it. But Anna was making this way too perfectly easy for Meg. This was what she wanted.
Meg smiled, her arms crossed around her abdomen. "You wouldn't mind?"
"No." She smiled nervously. "I-I…" And a nervous chuckle too. "I just let people just barging in my room anyway so... just… just come with me and we'll talk."
"I'm sure Hans wouldn't mind."
"Oh, of course not, ladies. Go on, I'll be here when you need me." The man sat back in his seat, a big cocky smile on his face. What a fucking moron.
Anna couldn't stand another second hearing him. "Alright, let's go."
She went off, leaving Meg to follow her behind.
And through the crowd, she could just hear her heart pounding. The excitement that ignited inside her. But Anna didn't let it show.
Because… who knows how this Meg was like. Who knows if she could be just like the others.
Others… who dirtied her cleanliness.
"Hey, wait." Anna felt a grasp on her wrist.
She turned, looking at the hand that held her wrist. Then her eyes. Though she could barely see with through the dim lights, she knew it was those big bright eyes that were just gleaming with happiness. That the infamous redhead that captured the hearts of a dozen men was standing before her. No… that she was willing to speak to her in terms ofthe pleasure and fun that she needed. Oh, but of course… they were all the same. Right?
Slowly, Anna pulled her wrist away. "We should go to my room to talk." She shook her head. "Not here. Definitely not here."
The woman chuckled. "Yes, yes, I know. I just… I just want you to know, if you don't want to do this, it's fine. I can find another-"
"Why wouldn't I?"
"Well, I..."
"It's what I do," she mumbled to herself.
Anna stared at her blankly, regardless of how much her heart wanted to burst out of her body. She'd learned how to control her expression for quite a long time now. Not expecting an answer, Anna turned and walked on to her dressing room.
And in there, they were alone and silent. The music and screaming echoed through that silence. And Anna was hunched over her table, Meg gazing at her against the closed door.
"Look… Meg." She sighed. "I will do what Hans tell me to do, don't worry. I just don't-"
"I'm sorry." Why?
"Don't be. It's just…" How open could she get? "You're not… the first Hans specifically told me to escort." She looked away, her head down, mumbling, "Won't be the first to treat me like shit."
For a moment, she wondered if Meg knew what to say. Just… standing there, watching her… like… like a fucking animal. No. Maybe Meg really did care-just didn't know what the hell to say.
Hell, what was she going to say anyway? They'd just met.
Anna chuckled. "Nevermind… I'm sorry, I got a bit distracted-"
"Why did you think I would treat you badly?"
Anna picked her head up, just to see that she was still looking at her. She couldn't tell what kind of expression she was having-how she was feeling but… perhaps, she was just curious. Like all the others.
Anna didn't have the heart to lie to her. After all, she'd come a long way… and now, the woman that she was hoping to see was right in front of her. "Aren't you just like every other person I've… I've pleasured? Treating me like I was a toy." She chuckled, glistening tears covering her pupils. And she took a deep breath to steady her heart. "You know, there was this one time, a few days ago when he just… grabbed me by the hair, grabbed my body… told me I was… his 'slut'. Fucked me like I was some sort of ragdoll, and I was just there to accept-"
"Please. Stop."
That's right. This was a bit too much. The woman looked away with regret and sorrow, wrapping her arms around her abdomen, and her body shivered through the cold night. "Yeah… I… it's my job, I know."
She hadn't realized Meg had gotten closer to her until she felt fingers running down her cheek. The brown eyes that looked so mysterious, for once, had given warmth to Anna. And she was completely mesmerized, searching for the warmth that she desired through her expression.
Like always, she let her heart have its way.
"I won't treat you like how others treated you. I promise."
Oh, Meg just sounded too sincere… and Anna was just too trusting. She leaned into her fingers.
For some reason… it seemed as if Anna had known her for her entire life. How the woman had already captured her heart-how close she was-how warm she felt. And at the moment, Anna hoped that perhaps, she really wasn't like the others. Those… pigs.
But they'd only just met each other. Anna knew that all too well.
Immediately, she pulled away. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to get so-"
"It's fine." A pause. "If you need anything, I'm here for you."
"How would I know?"
Meg tilted her head as if she knew Anna had trust issues. Gods, Anna didn't even realize how easily trusting she was, only to start distrusting others in a matter of minutes.
"Because I know… whenever I come here, you've always had an eye on me."
Did she? Anna had only been here for… just a couple of weeks. Perhaps, she was just saying this just to make her feel better. Anna nodded with uncertainty, her lip between her teeth. And she could just… feel herself wanting to let everything else go for her. Because, of course, Meg would be there for her. Or as she said.
But how will I know if you have your eyes on me…?