a/n: long chapter is long. *pats Anna* i love you
The girls had come home in silence in Elsa's car, their fingers entwined with each other that evening. Anna couldn't be happier to hear Elsa say the words, to know that Elsa wanted nothing but love from her. Tonight, she could just forget everything and have a good time with her… lover. And throughout their time, making a simple dinner and talking while eating, nothing seemed to have changed.
They acted like everything was normal because that was what Anna wanted. To be normal.
Oh, but it was as if she hadn't been very normal for a long time, and Elsa… talking with her, made her think otherwise.
Dinner was delightful, accompanied with music, and Elsa talking about her time and history with Olaf. Anna had a hard time picturing Elsa as a party monster during her college years. But, perhaps, she was just… being young. And Elsa still was this beautiful, young woman who Anna wanted to spend her time with. Life? Well… she'd see.
After dinner, Elsa was off to take a quick shower and a change of clothes. As far as Anna knew, Elsa didn't seem to have much planned after this, but… she didn't mind having to sit with her and talk about whatever they want. There was still much to learn about each other.
She stood silently, eyes staring out into the night. It had gotten a little cold. But she knew Elsa liked to keep her place cool. Anna wasn't going to complain. She crossed her arms.
Planes were flying through the dark sky, cars driving through the streets, and the smell of alcohol still lingered over her senses. It was quite eventful outside, the lights on buildings shining in the night, and the spectacle outside didn't make Anna seem so lonely. Ah, but with Elsa, she wouldn't be lonely. Never would be.
Thursday. The things she would do with Elsa-she gulped and gazed down to her feet-she wanted to feel the excitement that she never really had with others. She wanted all the things that would make her feel so thrilled to be there. To actually find pleasure in being with her. But she couldn't.
The thought of Hans finding out what they were behind his back… Anna wasn't scared of losing her job. In fact, it was the last thing she was scared of. What Hans could do, what he could think of to keep them separate, scared her. After all, Hans was already suspicious of them. He was careful… and everything he would do always had a reason behind it. Why does that sound so familiar?
And though, Anna had not experienced what he could do… she knew plenty of co workers who couldn't leave for… unknown reasons. She had her doubts that they were 'unknown'. Hans had always had this fishy smell on him. And what she feared… perhaps, it wasn't so unrecognizable to others.
Her eyebrows furrowed with worry at the thought.
Fingers wrapped around her waist and to her stomach from the back and Anna could feel her warm body cuddling up against her, her breathing against her skin. "What are you thinking about?"
How could she not have realized Elsa had been here all along?
Anna gazed over her shoulder, finding Elsa's chin propped on her shoulder. Those bright blue eyes gleamed at her. She let out a meek smile. "Nothing," she whispered. "Just… thinking about you."
"Have you called your mother?"
Anna definitely didn't want to talk about this. She looked up to the night sky in contemplation. "No. I… I'll do it when I come home tomorrow."
Elsa hummed, leaning in to kiss her neck. Anna tilted her head back against her. Gods, this feels so good… so right.
"Good girl." Oh, she could never get over this. Anna closed her eyes in submission, drowning in the sensation of her skin-of her warmth, no matter how cold she was. "Thinking about me... would you like to tell me more?" she breathed into her ear. Anna could feel the smile on Elsa's face.
Anna let her fingers pry between hers… and they swayed side by side slowly. Gently. Lovingly.
"Mm… do I have to?" She giggled. Never had she been this happy, and she never wanted this moment to last.
"Well, if you don't… you will have to show me later on tonight." Oh.
The redhead nearly choked, a hot flush brushing against her cheeks. And Elsa was chuckling. Fuck. She really knew how to play the escort. But so did Anna. "T-Then why don't I do both?" She turned around to face her, her arms reaching around her neck. Eye to eye, Anna gazed at her intently. Waiting. But nothing came out of Elsa… like she was shocked that Anna would say such a thing. Anna giggled, amused. "Miss Arendelle, are you speechless? Two can play that game, you know?"
Elsa laughed. "Oh, what more could I expect from you?"
"I don't know. Maybe… the things that I will tell you?" She bit her lip, eyes wandering everywhere except Elsa because she knew it would make her nervous. "The things… you do that make me feel better." She chuckled. "Like, all the time. You know, I'm… forever grateful. Seriously." Hands came climbing up her back and they pressed their bodies closer together. Ah, it was everything that Anna needed. To feel someone being intimate with her.
Elsa's eyes were comforting, her smiling loving. This was different, indeed, but it was a good different. "I know."
Of course, she didn't need Elsa to reply because she already knew what Elsa thought of her with that smile on her face. As if Elsa would be so inclined to give her whatever she needed. What she would do to keep her safely in her arms. She couldn't stop looking at her… the happiness that filled Elsa. How… much Anna knew she wanted to love. But this silence wasn't as simple as just staring into each other's eyes in love. The air was burdened with heavy thoughts and heavy hearts.
Anna bit her lip, glancing down to Elsa's. Nervous? No. Though, she was quite… curious. She tilted her head, letting her hair fall over her shoulder. "What are you… thinking right now?"
They continued to sway, but Elsa kept her mouth shut. Fuck, this isn't good.
Fingers graze her back, and Anna felt her body shiver like it wanted more. "Mm..." The blonde hummed, her eyes wandering up and down her figure, gleaming darkly like she knew what she wanted… what her body was feeling. Elsa was patient. "Seeing you like this tonight... I have to admit, you look beautiful."
Her heart leaped. "Thank you." A pause. "You're... thinking about something else." It prompted Elsa to raise her eyebrows in submission. Anna waited with anticipation. Elsa was never good at answering these questions… but honesty was what Anna needed. The blonde eyed her expression, knowingly.
"You must think…" Elsa leaned into her ear, her arms hugging her tight, and oh… Anna didn't ever want to let go. They let their bodies dance slowly to the music, embracing each other comfortably. Anna could stay like this forever, and she only wished Elsa would talk to her like this every night. "Because we've only known each other for two months… 'why me?'. 'Why did you come to me?' Correct?"
Anna wanted to laugh out loud. Am I really this obvious? She leaned her cheek against Elsa's. But she had to admit… this 'thing' with Elsa wasn't something she expected to have. Not her. Not this love. "There were so many other women that could fulfill all your desires. And you… picked me. A girl who's been struggling financially. So yeah… I couldn't help but think … why me…?" she questioned, eyes blankly staring up at the ceiling.
Elsa chuckled into her ear, lips against her skin. "Well, wouldn't it be interesting if I keep it a secret?"
Anna rolled her eyes. She knew Elsa wouldn't play around like that and keep secrets, no matter how playful she could get. "I don't think us keeping any secrets is our forte."
She took a deep breath. "If I tell you, promise me you won't laugh."
"Of course not."
Slowly, Elsa pulled away. "I chose you because… of all the women that danced before you, you looked the most… lively."
What? Anna let out a small choke of laughter before suppressing it with a finger against her lips. Elsa cocked an eyebrow, daringly. "Though, that's not the only reason."
"Sorry," she mumbled, meekly. "You have other reasons? I mean…"
The woman gazed over her shoulder at the night sky. This talk shouldn't have been serious, but the way Elsa stood so quietly… left Anna uncertain. But what did it matter? Whatever Elsa did was in the past. "Of course… I told you about Hans-how he… talked about you. How he talked about your circumstances. It never caught my interest. I didn't think about helping you at first, I must admit. That is… until I saw you." Elsa kissed her neck… her breath caressing her skin. Anna wasn't going to be distracted, no. Gods, but could she ever resist? "I thought to myself… sitting there, watching you dance, 'how could such a gorgeous young woman dance so beautifully… and why this?'"
She didn't know what to feel, and she let the woman's arms wrap around her body, her own face pressed against her warmth… and Anna felt drawn into her. But she wasn't feeling lust. All there was right now was love.
"I wanted to keep our distance… leave us in a place where we kept yearning, because of him." Anna closed her eyes, letting herself hug the woman tighter. "Because I care about your well being…" Elsa breathed. "But I knew if I continued this, I could lose you. I didn't want to lose my chance."
Anna didn't say anything, letting her words sing to her ear, her touch leaving her craving more. Of course, Anna was forever thankful because Elsa was there for her now. When she found herself alone, Elsa would be there for her. She was her rock.
"Thank you," she whispered, pulling away to look into her eyes. "I keep… burdening you, even yelled at you, but you've always been so patient. I don't understand how…"
"When you have a father that has always been pushing you to perfection, patience keeps you sane." Her blue eyes were blank, her expression empty of any emotion. It was… always interesting to see this side of her-cold and detached from the world. Ah, perhaps, that was what triggered her love. How solemn she looked at times… no matter how warm she was. She changes. A lot. Oh, perhaps, that was what her father could do to her.
She let her eyes wander. "I… I never really managed to show you how much I appreciate the things you do."
"Appreciation." Elsa ran her fingers down the escort's back. "I don't need any. I have you to feel appreciated for."
Anna cocked her head to one side, and yes… she did want to show her appreciation. How glad she was to have Elsa take care of her. "Oh?" She bit her lips, and she let her fingers fall down to Elsa's hip. There wasn't a moment when Anna didn't want to kiss her lips… didn't want to take them to a place where the air was filled with red hot pleasure and lust. "You know…" she breathed, prompting the woman to look into her soul. To strip her of everything, and Anna was willing to give it all up for her. "If it weren't for you…" Their body pressed together, her fingers playing with the hem of her shirt. Anna wished for this to go faster… for this to begin. She bit her lip. "If it weren't for you, I wouldn't be here."
"No, you wouldn't." Quite blunt. And for a moment, they stayed quiet. Anna felt her thoughts swimming around. To kiss her. To show her your love. To show how much she wanted her. "Now… tell me, what are you doing?"
"W-What?" Anna blinked.
"Your eyes…" She brushed her thumb on her freckled cheek.
Suddenly, Anna's back hit the glass wall, her wrists being grasped and propped above her head. Her breath hitched, heart drumming fast and hard and never had she seen Elsa gaze at her with eyes that were filled with fire. The longing. And Anna stayed still, her fingers shrinking into a fist. Her eyes widened in shock. Has she ever been this forceful?
But it didn't matter. Those cold eyes were too enticing-too beautiful. And this wasn't the first time Elsa had pushed her up against the wall to do unspeakable things to her. Oh, she could stay like this forever.
Her blonde hair fell over her shoulder. "Tell me… why are you looking at me like that?" she breathed, and Anna could only turn her attention to her lips. To imagine… how wonderful it would be to kiss her. No, not yet.
But Anna could play the same game. "You don't know what I'm thinking about." She bit her lip in temptation.
Elsa leered, her finger coming up to caress her lips… her eyes inspecting every little freckle that dotted her cheeks. She shivered with desire and anticipation… Anna wanted something more. Anna shut her eyes, sighing into the sensation of her touch that would ignite her lust. Ah, it's warm…
"I believe I do…" she whispered, and they were so close. Her wonderful scent ruled over Anna, her body pressing up close… and Anna didn't dare open her eyes to see her expression. How she was itching to ravish her. But she couldn't because Elsa was in control. Elsa had always been the one to control her pleasure-her words… and when she would plead for relief.
Anna gulped. "T-Then why don't you let go of me and let me do what I want to do?" Oh, it wasn't a question that she knew Elsa was going to answer.
"And what would that be?" She felt her breath against her red hot ear. God, take me. "I want you to tell me."
The escort opened her darkened eyes and gave in. "I want you." Always.
"I know you do." Did she have to say it out loud?
"So please…" she begged. And she was willing to beg more to love the woman she wanted to love. To get what she wanted. Let me have you. "Let me pleasure you… let me love you."
"Hm."
It wasn't good enough. Oh, she really had to spell it out, did she? "I-I want… I want to feel you on me… to hear you call my name…"
Silently… Elsa released her wrists, taking a step back with her arms to her sides. It really was this easy? Anna blinked.
"Go on. Do what you want."
Oh. Elsa was all hers at the moment. All vulnerable for her. She could do whatever she wanted, and Anna could feel her heart soar at the thought of making her feel ever so divine. To feel loved.
She stepped closer to her, fingers holding her waist. Elsa wasn't resisting. What a surprise. Anna was glad her lover was only wearing a shirt right now. Makes the job easier.
"You know…" Anna whispered, smiling. She came even closer… her body pressed against Elsa's again as if she wanted more of her warmth. As if, she knew not to hurry. But how could she not? She yearned to feel her body against her-every single curve of her. "You are really... full of surprises."
The woman smirked. "Do you usually talk this much? You were begging me a few seconds ago."
"God, just shut it." Anna quickly leaned in, her lips pressed to hers like she always wanted-needed, her palms holding her cheeks, and Elsa's holding her wrists. It was a sweet, sweet paradise to live in, in the night... to touch her however she liked. Her body was growing hot… and she couldn't help but moan her love into her lips. She took a deep breath, and from that one kiss… every thought of lust that filled her mind escaped. Because she wanted more… the pleasure. The numbing of her body. To fill her body with love. To fill her body with nothing but her mark. To be hers.
And she kissed her once more, her tongue probing Elsa's lips to open, and she did. She couldn't hear the sighs that came out of her lips… couldn't feel the hands that were reaching for her ass to hold. Because she didn't care. All she cared for was her kiss that would lead them to something more. Fuck...
Her cheeks were flushed red when she pulled away. Anna opened her eyes, pressed her forehead against Elsa's. Gods, it was so hard to breathe. Her eyes were so dark with desire. Is it really this hot? "Do you mind…?" she whispered, pushing the woman towards the couch without an answer.
Her lovely blue eyes gazed up at the escort as Elsa sat there. She chuckled, amused. "You are being quite an eager one today."
Oh, did she want to roll her eyes, but at moments like this… when her body was throbbing and twitching to touch her and be touched… she didn't have the will to listen or reply to her remarks.
The escort propped herself above Elsa, her legs sitting beside her sides… and Anna could just feel her palms running up her twitching thighs. She sighed, drugged from her touch, and the eyes that stripped her down from her innocence… that caressed her body ever so wonderfully. That gave her all her attention. There was no time for games. Immediately, Anna pulled her shirt off, showing nothing but her black laced bra.
Elsa raised her eyebrows, and already, Anna could see a slight widening of her eyes.
"No, I wasn't waiting for us to do this if that's what you're thinking." Anna scoffed.
"I wouldn't have it any other way, baby..." She leaned her head back, waiting… anticipating. The wanton look in her eyes… filled Anna with excitement. Cold chills spiraled down her spine. Anna eyed her in silence. Baby, she says. Oh, she wanted to hear her call her that again. To hear her moan it. To feel her lips mumble that against her skin… Fuck. She was too deep into this. And she was… loving way too much of this. But it was okay-it was just Elsa.
Slowly, she leaned down, her palms caressing her cheeks… and the kiss. She sighed against into this sweet, sweet kiss… the fingers that ran through her hair-and Anna knew she wanted to just give herself to Elsa. Anna breathed in her scent, biting her bottom lip before pulling away with eyes that were filled with the color of lust.
"No need to be so hasty," the woman hissed, their lips brushing against each other. Anna took in her bright blue eyes. So hypnotizing. Mesmerizing. She placed her hands atop of Elsa's on her legs. "We have all the time in the world, baby..." The woman grinned. There it is again.
"That's why I'm being hasty. Off," she gasped, grasping Elsa's hem of her shirt and swiftly pulled it over her head. And she stared at her body… completely enchanted, and her heart had stopped at the sight of her chest heaving in and out as she breathed… her toned stomach leaving Anna breathless. Speechless. She eyed her body like she had never seen anything like it before.
And she gulped, taking all of her in slowly like it was her last meal.
With how she was being so still, Anna thought she was going to faint at the sight.
Elsa was so relaxed… her hands fitting her legs to pull her closer. "Intrigued?"
Anna blinked. Intrigued? No. Aroused, definitely. She felt a blush brushing her cheeks. "No, just…" She leaned in again, her fingers trailing up her pale, thin arms ever so slowly, gently… and Anna could feel her lover's body shiver. Wanting to take control again. Oh, I know you.
"I'm very… very happy," the escort breathed, her own lips caressing with hers. Just a little taste… a little tease. And she pretended this night was Thursday… where they would indulge themselves to this drug called pleasure. To… feel.
Elsa beamed against her. "I can see that… Now, do you plan on keeping your clothes on, because I do have plans to take them off."
Oh, really? "You wouldn't do that."
She cocked her head to one side. "You do not want to test me."
Anna wasn't going to… and she let the woman unstrap her bra and let it fall. She watched her blue eyes fall to her breasts then to her eyes… like she was intrigued. Because there was no way… Anna could ever get used to seeing her beautiful body, and she knew, Elsa was the same. "I try not to." Kiss. And this time, it wasn't because she craved to pleasure her… to lust after her, but it was to love her. She breathed in her scent, sighing into this kiss… and she could feel Elsa's fingers running circles on her back. Ah, it really was paradise with her. It really was.
The clock ticked in the silent night… and Anna gazed in wonder at her sleeping beauty… the blanket covering nothing but her legs as she slept on her side. She wasn't sure how the blonde could sleep like this so easily… well, she shouldn't be so surprised. Elsa seemed like the type to have slept with many women in the past without any regard. Not that it was her right to assume.
But tonight, Anna had the pleasure to sleep with her… to make her feel good and to feel amazing. She sat up, letting her hair fall over her shoulder, eyes watching her lover sleep through this warm, pleasurable night. Anna couldn't get over this sight. Couldn't ever… wish to be next to a better woman than her.
Slowly, she glided her fingers up Elsa's exposed arm. "You make me feel… very, very good…" she whispered to herself, her eyes kept on the bruises on her wrists. The cuffs that once kept her in place, left her blinded with thoughts of being hers. To be her prisoner… but it was okay. It was all worth it.
And what she did to Anna… making her cry tears for relief… her body shaking at the fingers that pushed her to her limits-that made her scream--come like never before. She wished she could stay beneath her forever, with the woman speaking love to her kisses and touches. She wished for the pleasure to never end.
Oh, it was a mistake to think Elsa wanted to be pleasured, but it was all worth it. It was so, so worth it.
She looked to the nightstand beside the bed, occupied by her phone, Elsa's cuffs and her blindfold. She swallowed, reaching for the metal cuffs, fingers brushing at the cold surface before grasping it tightly in her hand. Anna could just see the reflection of herself on the surface. Her blank, tired expression.
Anna wondered why she continued to do this… to feel hands grabbing her in places that she would never expect, harsh words leaving her aroused for hours… but she knew. Oh, she knew… it was for the thrill. To please Meg. No, to please… Elsa. How could she ever stop doing this?
She chuckled to herself silently, placing the handcuffs down to her lap. How could she forget? This was her profession. But tonight… she'd forgotten her profession because she had indulged herself-submitted herself to Elsa. Because in her arms… she felt safe. In her arms, she was hers, and nobody else mattered. Anna could forget everything.
Anna took a deep breath as she reached for her phone. It was already four in the morning. She glared at the brightly lit screen. One voicemail, and a bunch of other texts from her mother and Andrew.
Just seeing that was pissing her off. The thought of trying her very best to lessen her struggles-the thought of her mother lying to her all this time… it left her fuming with anger. But how was she different from her mother? Anna wanted to just shut her phone off forever. She couldn't.
And for a while, she stared at the screen in contemplation. She promised Elsa that she would talk to her mother. Especially, deep down in her heart, Anna knew… all of this was never her fault. Martha was only trying to protect her from men like him.
Though she wondered if she ever did a good job by doing that. I mean… look at me. I'm an escort.
She turned to Elsa. But, at least, I found her.
Her heart ached as she opened that voicemail, a beep sounding before her mother spoke.
"Hi, honey. It's me. Um, I know you don't want to talk to me, at this moment. That's okay. I know you're safe at your girlfriend's home, so I'm not worried. Listen, I just… I just want you to tell you… I'm sorry." A deep, shaky breath sounded. And though, Anna's heart felt heavy… she felt nothing else. She couldn't cry when she was supposed to. "I'm sorry for everything that I've said… for what I've done. I've… hurt you, when I'm supposed to give you all my love. All my attention. I never wanted anything less than to take good care of you, Anna. To protect you. If you can't forgive him… I understand, but please… what happened in the past, stays in the past. He cares very much about you, Anna. Give him one chance. Talk to him. If not… well, we're okay with that, and we will own up to our mistakes. I won't talk about him ever again. You must be sleeping at the moment. Please come back home soon. I… I love you. Bye."
Anna let out a heavy sigh. No tears. She knew not to be weak at times like this. She sat on the side of the bed, back faced to Elsa. She couldn't sleep, even after the tiring activity.
Her mother… had never apologized like this. Never had spoken her words this softly and gently to her. And it just… made Anna feel so pathetic. The guilt that filled her-the anger, continued to stay. But she knew it was best to come back home as soon as possible. To see her mother… to apologize for her behavior. All those years of rebelling, this was the first time she'd ignore her mother for so long.
"God, what is wrong with me…?" she breathed. Chills rained down her back as she felt cold fingers running down her spine. She turned, blue eyes staring back at hers. Had she been here listening? "Hi," Anna murmured.
Elsa circled her finger on her skin. "You're not sleeping."
"Couldn't sleep." She smiled, meekly. "Just… checking my phone, that's all. Why aren't you sleeping?"
"You were mumbling quite a bit."
Cute. Anna could just imagine the pout that she had, but she doubted Elsa would do such a thing. Ah, the night was getting warmer. With the dark thoughts aside, she shifted back into bed, lying side by side with Elsa. "Sorry… it's nothing." She held Elsa's hand. "You should go back to sleep."
"Mm…" the woman let out a satisfying hum, leaning in to kiss the back of her hand. "How was tonight?"
She blinked. "Tonight? Y-You mean, tonight, tonight or…?"
Elsa smirked. "I can be blunt and say, how was the-"
"It was great." Gods, Anna could already feel her body getting hot again, and not because of arousal. She bit her lip, her eyes wandering up and down. "It really was... I-I liked it. To have you take care of me, I mean."
Elsa gazed down, shades of blue glowing in the night… and Anna wasn't sure what she was thinking. How she was feeling… because her expression had softened to an empty shell. "To take care of you…" she breathed. "Do I take good care of you?"
What? Why is she saying this? Confused, Anna hesitated to answer. "Y-Yeah, of course. Why?"
"It's nothing you should worry about." Oh, Anna worried. But now wasn't the time to question her. She just wanted to be in her arms right now. Slowly, she scooted closer to Elsa's body.
She didn't need a blanket when Elsa was here to warm her up. Anna gazed at the top of her chest in silence, and they let it embrace them… let it fill their minds with thoughts. She could feel Elsa breathing on top of her… her fingers drawing on the skin of her shoulder blades. Ah, what a wondrous feeling.
"I'll come home tomorrow," she whispered.
"Yes, you will." A pause. "Would you like me to drive you?"
Anna nodded. "Please."
"You can always come back later if you feel unwell."
"I know."
"Do you feel unwell?" Elsa pulled away slightly, a concerned frown on her face. Anna knew how to reply back to get rid of her worries. Well, not that Elsa would ever feel slightly worried about her.
She shook her head. "No, but I will come back. Wait, does that mean I… I get to live with you?"
The blonde shifted her hand to her hair. "Don't be so eager."
God, what are you, an idiot? Apparently. "Just curious, that's all." She shrugged. Still, Anna was a bit disappointed. "Could you come closer? It's cold without you."
Elsa laughed, her arms holding the escort tighter, her lips pressed to her forehead. Gods, it felt good to have Elsa as her lover. To find her hands holding Anna's as someone special and not because of her profession. She couldn't help but find color filling her cheeks, a smile stretching out. Tonight… had been wonderful.
She found fingers running through her hair to coax her to relax. "Sleep."
Ah, as commanding as ever, huh? Anna closed her eyes, pressing her face against her skin… her scent. "Love you…"
"Good night, beautiful."
She was nervous, staring at the front door, key in her hand. Elsa said everything would be okay in the car, and that she would stay for a few minutes if she changed her mind. Anna didn't. She knew this was something she had to do, and not because she wanted to.
Taking a deep breath, she unlocked the door. "Mom…?" She peered inside. "Mom, I'm home."
"Honey?!" Came her voice from the bedroom. Anna closed the door behind her and before she knew it, a flash of auburn hair was coming towards her, arms hugging her tightly. But Anna didn't react. She didn't know how to.
"Oh god… Anna… Anna, are you okay? Are you hurt?" Martha pulled away to eye her up and down, hands searching for any injuries. God, she badly wanted to roll her eyes.
"Mom, I'm fine!" She chuckled weakly. "She brought me home."
"Oh, thank god…" Martha hugged her again, this time tighter than ever. "I'm so glad you went with your girlfriend… she takes very good care of you…"
"Yeah… she does."
"Oh… I'm so glad you're home. Andrew and I were so worried, but we knew we needed to give you some space."
She wrapped her arms around her mother. "Yeah, I know…" she whispered. What am I doing? It wasn't long before Anna started weeping on her shoulder, her forehead pressed to her neck. Everything felt awful, and she needed an out. She needed to pour out all the feelings that left her dead and empty inside. The guilt, anger, frustration… and all of that left her with nothing but relief. Because nobody blamed her… nobody forced her into doing anything.
She felt her mother shush her, her hand riding up and down her back. "Come on, baby… why are you crying?"
"I'm sorry…" Anna wept. "I-I'm so sorry… I shouldn't have acted this way… I shouldn't have made you worry…"
"It's okay, honey. It's okay. I'm sorry too. You have nothing to blame yourself for. I'm here, Anna."
She shouldn't have to be this kind to me! Anna covered her teary eyes as she pulled away, choking nothing but her words back. "I-I'm an adult and all I have ever d-done these past few days is act like a fucking child. I'm sorry, mom…"
"I don't blame you, Anna, for running away." She tugged Anna's hands away from her eyes. Ah, it was comforting to see her smile… because for a while, Anna hadn't seen how happy Martha was. "Anna, look at me."
"You should b-blame me…"
"I'm your mother, how could I ever blame you for anything? I would run too if suddenly my mother told me I had a father that I never met." The woman sighed, her hands on her wet cheeks, and Anna was forced to gaze at her. "Listen… I'm fine with you not meeting him. Ever. I want you to be happy, Anna."
Anna nodded, sniffling. "I know."
"Good."
"I just… I don't know how to react to this."
"It's hard, sweetie. Even I was afraid you would do this, but… it's normal to run. To be angry."
Ah, so she did understand. Anna barely let out a grin. "Thank you."
Martha leaned in to kiss her forehead. "Now, come on, if you haven't eaten, I'll make you your favorite."
"N-No, wait." She grasped onto her mother's hand before she could go. "I'll meet him."
Martha tilted her head, eyebrows crossed. "What?"
Anna didn't know how to look at her. At herself. I have to do this. I don't have a choice. "I said I'll meet him… I'll meet my father."
"Anna, no, you don't have to do this if you don't want to."
"I need to. So that maybe… maybe I could forgive him. Forgive myself."
"Yourself?" Martha squinted her eyes. No, she didn't need to know what she had done at night. Not now. Not ever.
"No, it's nothing. Just… tell me when and where."
You're telling me, you're not making enough?"
"No." Anna took a deep breath. "What else do you have to offer?"
"Ah, what else… hm…" Hans propped his legs up on his table, spinning his chair left to right in silence. All Anna could feel was his… disgustingly green eyes molesting her body-=getting into her bikini and just eye-fucking her. She looked away, crossing her arms on her toned stomach. As if that's any help to cover me up.
"You know… you, out of… all your co-workers, are a special one."
Anna raised her eyebrows. "Special?"
Chuckling, Hans stood up, his hands coming up to loosen his thin tie. "Yes, you're the first to ask me something like this. Well, from circumstance anyway." He shrugged. "Though, I did tell you in the first place you can be an escort… but you decided to dance, instead. That's okay."
He was right, no matter how much she wanted to retort. "I just… need more. Now."
This shouldn't be happening. Anna eyed the man cautiously as he fumbled through his drawer and pulled out a folder. In it, were a stack of paper. He dropped it in front of her, nodding to her direction. "Check those out."
Crossing her eyebrows in curiosity, she opened the folder. Her eyes widened.
Anna quickly shut the folder. "Are you…" Escort… he did tell me I could do that… After working here for a month… she could've seen this coming today. She closed her eyes to collect her thoughts. Hans could be smirking right now, and she wouldn't even care. This… bastard of a manager knew what he was doing. "You're… asking me to be an escort."
"No, not asking. Telling." He sat on the table in front of her, arms crossed. "So what do you think?"
"What do I think?" Anna squinted her eyes. "I…" She was completely speechless. Hans was acting like this was completely nothing to him-=but, of course, it wasn't. There must've been so many already doing this. Kristoff, perhaps, too. "How many people have done this?"
Hans took a deep breath, eyes on the ceiling. "There are… about fifteen of your co-workers working as an escort per week-most of them, two to four nights. But you are younger than most of them, so I will make an exception. One night."
"One night?" No, she seriously wasn't going to consider this. Never.
"Your option. But one night for… well, two hours minimum with a fixed rate of about… 2k. You can do whatever you want. So what's it going to be?"
Anna gulped. God. 2k for one night… it was tempting. So tempting. She gazed down at her hands.
So Hans said she could do whatever she wanted with her client… but that would only mean whatever that was not… sexual, she would earn very little. What she needed was something that would give her more. And all she could think of was… nothing innocent. Dirty, that is. And Hans was looking at her like he knew what she was thinking. "I don't know."
He huffed a breath, grinning smugly. "Well, this will be your best choice here, if you want money fast. You always seem to be on your own without the care of your parents. You must make a decision if you want this."
"I won't…" Anna was shaking. "I d-don't-"
"And if I may say… if you are going to have sex… and I know what you're thinking," his expression grew grim, "well, I'm sure you won't disappoint me. You are free to do so. And because it's not considered 'legal'… I am warning you to be careful-I don't want cops wandering in here, looking for you and I. Understood?"
But this was a hard decision to make. Too hard… and Anna could already feel herself suffer just from hearing his words. His eyes were threatening. But even then, Anna knew she had no choice. If she wanted to clear her six digit debt and earn some without the help of her family… this was fine. Because this was temporary. Right?
"What else do the others do?"
He thought about it for a second. "Whatever the client feels so inclined to do. Talking… shopping… pretending to be on a little date-Do you want that?" He raised his eyebrows.
She could enjoy this… she will enjoy it. Anna felt her heart growing heavy. Not that she had the choice to decline-Hans would certainly threaten her. "Okay, I'll sign the contract."
"Excellent. Now that, that's gotten over with..." Fuck, fuck, fuck… "I will help you with the rest of process."
Anna didn't want to think about it. She reached for one of the empty contracts and a pen, immediately signing her signature and everything else. It was as if she made no attempt to really think this through… that she had no control of her body at all. She gazed at Hans. "And?"
Eyes wide as he stared at the filled paper, he said, "Well, and…" He took it in his hand, reading it through. "Actually, just be careful."
Why am I listening? "I see." At this point, Anna knew… she had already stooped so low, that she had to accept all the things she would do. The job… that would strip her purity away.
"We will discuss this again. Tell me, what day do you want first?"
She didn't know what day she wanted. But not that days ever mattered to her anyway. "Thursday."
"Good. Tomorrow, come back to me after your shift… and then, we can talk about next week."
"Next week?"
He eyed her, his fingers tilting her chin up. Anna cringed at his touch. Never… had she felt more dirtied by anyone other than him. "Next week… you will have your very first client."