Disclaimer: I don't own Tiger & Bunny in any way, shape, or form. I just like to play with the characters.

Summary:Barnaby starts seeing some impressive vocabulary in the official Apollon Media Hero reports... in the papers written by Kotetsu?! [Future Fic]

Author's Note: Some actual fluff for once! :D (and now with fixed names!)

Barnaby stood in the doorway, flipping through the papers in his hands and frowning. They were all filled out correctly, and the grammar was passable, but the vocabulary... did Kotetsu really write these reports?

"You okay Bunny?" His partner in crime smiled at him, brandishing a spoon since he was currently eating a bowl of fried rice at his desk.

Of course he is. Today's Wednesday, so it's Lee's Chinese Rice day.

"Oh, did I make a mistake on the reports?" His grin got bigger, enough so that the rice stuck in the corner was obvious. "Sorry! I'll fix it later!"

"Noo..." said Barnaby, flipping through them again and adjusting his glasses. "I just wanted to ask if someone helped you. with these? They're a lot more..." he paused, trying to find the word. "eloquent than usual."

"I am an adult you know."

He was on the verge of apologizing when their wrist bands went off ,and the papers were forgotten... for the moment.

"Look Bunny. All I'm saying is that you complain when I do the reports and you complain when I don't do the reports," grumbled Kotetsu, shrugging out of his suit as they undressed. His locker banged open as he fished around for his spare outfit. "I might as well not do them."

"That's not what I meant!" protested Barnaby, hands held up in high in surrender.

Please don't make me go back to doing all the damn paperwork myself!

"I was just trying to figure out where some of this vocabulary came from." The two of them finished changing and walked back into their smaller office. Their heated office thankfully, since Stern Bild was in a bit of a cold snap. Bunny grabbed the reports from where he had tossed them on his desk. "Like this one. 'The park was in a state of aberration.'"

"The park was in chaos and was the opposite of normal." Tiger poked at his cold lunch and sighed. "Ugggh, I hate reheating my fried rice, I swear it leaches the taste away."

Barnaby's eyes tracked Kotetsu across the room, flickering every so often to the pages held in his hand.

Since when does Tiger know the meaning of "aberration"? And use it?

Still acting on instincts, he flipped open his cell phone and fired off a message to Kaede, surreptitiously snapping a picture of the word in question.

Huh - thought it was me

Thought what was you?

Dad growing verbose - I picked up on it last month. Let me know when you find out!

Barnaby glanced at the calendar.

January. But what happened then? And Kaede only said that she picked up on it then, it could have been going on for much longer.

He stuffed the papers in a briefcase and tried to ignore them, focusing instead on typing up his response to today's earlier incident. It didn't really help. The papers were burning questions in his brain, and he could feel his eyes continually slide to where they were under his desk.

"Hey, Bunny... do you have a crick in your neck? You keep staring off to the side."

Yeah. It didn't really help.

"Where is he getting these words?!" Barnaby could taste the frustration in his voice after another month of going nowhere in figuring out the mystery. Sneaking back to work had confirmed what Kaede had said; the reports had gotten wordier in January. Nathan had no idea, and Antonio had laughed at him until he'd produced the reports, then had been even more bewildered than him.

Such a small thing, but it's driving me nuts! Did I misjudge him so badly?

"It's not like I think he's an idiot, " Barnaby justified aloud. "It's just that... this doesn't feel like him at all!" He felt the papers clutched in his hand crumple.

Except it clearly was him.

Laconic. The woman who saw the robbery was laconic and we were able to quickly pursue.

Pernicious. Recommend transferring the NEXT to a hospital due to their pernicious power.

Truculent. The perp was being truculent and so Dragon Kid zapped him.

Capitulate. After engaging in battle, the criminal capitulated, asking for us to let her see her parents one last time before jailing her.

Barnaby let out a huff of frustration, tangling a hand in his curls.

This is getting ridiculous! I have ways of making him talk!

Except, if he used those ways, Kotetsu would babble and make cute noises, not serenade him with three-syllable words...

"Bonjour Barnaby!"

Biting back his first response, the Hero nodded, even though no one could see him. The folder was flicked back onto his desk, and before she said anything, he began striding to where they stored the suits.

"Tiger's not with me Agnes."

"I know." There was a pause. "I'm actually calling about your partner. He and Dragon Kid could use a helping hand; you're the nearest one."

Barnaby sped up.

"Are they okay?"

Who are they up against that they need help?

"For now."

Injuries? Captured?

"What do I need to know?"

Agnes let out a big sigh, one that was heard as if she was puffing straight into his ear. He shook his head to clear it.

"They're fine. You being there will get the fight over quickly."

"Not good enough for ratings?" he joked.

"Those two?" She snorted, and Barnaby paused, raising his eyebrow at the communicator. "Not since the beginning of the year."

January again? And since when was Tiger destroying things not good for ratings? Sure Agnes says she hates it, but I've seen her damage vs. ratings spreadsheet.

"Here's the location. Finish it so I can hopefully get something interesting."

A ping alerted him that the location had been received.

Barnaby heard them before he saw them, which, considering the fighting was taking place in an empty industrial area, wasn't that surprising. He stood by and scanned the area first though, trying to see where the problems were more likely to come from. Two unconscious bodies were tied together at the front of one of the buildings, and he sent a message to Agnes for a police pick up.

One's fried and one's bruising. Dragon Kid and Tiger were certainly here.

"He's holding something weird, like a sword," he heard his partner say. There was a slight echo to it, leading Barnaby to peek into the nearest building, making sure to keep his head low.

Bingo.

"How is a sword weird?" asked Dragon Kid. A crackle and flash of light followed her statement. "I mean, I have a staff, and can shoot lightning from my hands. That's weird when you think about it, right?"

He spotted them just as the pillar next to Dragon Kid was sliced in half; she went left, Tiger went right, and Barnaby stopped where he was, movement in the shadows near him catching his eyes.

More than one of them in here... He crept closer to where the shadows were darker, leaving his fellow Heroes with the sword wielder.

"Okay. Fair enough. I say weird not because it's sword-shaped, but because I saw them make it out of a cactus."

"Xiphoid," corrected Dragon Kid.

Xiphoid? Barnaby felt his ears perk up at the word even as he focused on a big blonde man holding a rocket launcher. And what do you think's going to happen with that? You're just going to blow all of us up.

"It's a xiphoid cac-wait, did you say it was made out of a plant? You're botanophobic?"

"No, but those thorns look like they'd hurt!" protested Tiger. He grunted a few seconds later. "Great. I can confirm it's xyresic too."

Crap, that's his "I'm hurt but I'm not going to admit it" voice. And xyresic? He snuck up behind Mr. Play-with-Explosives and tapped the man on the shoulder.

"What th-?" One quick punch and he was out; it wasn't even enough to power up for.

"Owww..."

"Right, I'm just going to zap the guy." Dragon Kid put words to action, hitting him with a lightning streak that would have left spots in Barnaby's vision if he wasn't wearing his suit. He almost felt a little sorry for the guy. Almost. "Does the cactus make you xyrohobic?"

"No. I'm not afraid of sharp things."

"It's the fear of dryness or dry places."

"Not that either," sighed Tiger. "What would be stupendous would be you getting these thorns out of me."

There's my cue., I know I've got more medical experience than Dragon Kid.

"I can help with that," said Barnaby, strolling out from the shadows.

"Bunny?" Tiger was clutching his shoulder, fingers spread out to avoid touching the pen-length thorns that were sticking out. "What are you doing here?"

"Agnes said you needed some help." He bent down to look at his partner. Little patches of blood were welling up from each site they were sticking out from. "You okay Dragon Kid?"

"He didn't hit me. Just Wild Tiger."

"You're too, what's the word? Assiduous."

Yeah, this is ground zero for those reports.

"Okay, I've got to know. What's up with the words?" asked Barnaby, gripping one of the spikes and tugging on it. Tiger grimaced, but nodded for him to continue when he paused.

"Ah," Dragon Kid blushed, gripping her staff tighter. "I'm studying for my SATs."

oh ...that was not what I expected.

"Already? I thought those were for graduating high-school students?" The blond pushed his face plate up to look a bit closer at the injury. "I think these are barbed."

"I'm studying with Karina."

Wild Tiger looked her over, grinning as her blush deepened.

"Kid's a good study partner too. Picks up the lingo fast and is even able to explain definitions when most others would be distracted. I'm sure Karina appreciates it, since practice is half the battle."

A study partner? I've been wracking my brain and guilting myself sick over studying?

"That's all this was? Tiger," sighed Barnaby, rubbing that headache spot on his nose, the one that usually headed off the pain.. "You had me going crazy trying to figure this out."

The older Hero laughed, then groaned when he moved his arm.

"I was having fun teasing you Bunny. You're always so serious, I thought you'd enjoy having a small mystery to pick apart."

Did you know Agnes doesn't like it?"

Dragon Kid and Wild Tiger looked at each other and snickered.

"We know. It's been fun winding her up too, since she can't say anything bad about studying."

Well... I guess I was worried for nothing. Barnaby studied his partner, taking in warm chestnut eyes and an infectious grin. It is part of his nature.

"What?"

"Nothing," said Barnaby. "Just coming to a conclusion."

Letter from the Soup - X for Xiphoid (my new favorite word!)

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