"Father." I glare at him, standing in the doorway. He looks older than he did the other day, like he hasn't had sleep in days. He has a crazier vibe to him than usual, which is saying a lot.
The barn is big and there are two loft areas, one on the left and one on the right side of the barn. Dad keeps hay up there, and I don't really know why because we don't have any animals. That same hay has been up there since the first time daddy brought me here. There is a ladder for each loft giving us access to get up there. Other than the lofts and a small room at the back of the room, there is nothing in the barn. It's just a big empty space with some hay, a table and some chains.
"I see you came alone. Good girl. Come to me." He waved his hand, motioning for me to walk up to him. In his other hand laid the belt that I was way too familiar with. It's been a while since I had a beating, and the plan is to keep it that way. I don't move a muscle, just glare. "Tisk tisk Clarissa. I see you have become a little more independent since we were last in the barn. I can fix that."
"Where's Simon?" I'm here for business not talk.
"Oh." He smiled and let out a few chuckles. "I was just about to mention him…he's here. Would you like to see him?" I nodded, still standing in the same spot. My father raised the belt and smacked it on the table twice, hard. It made a different, louder sound with the table than it did with skin. I was confused as to why hitting the table was necessary, but then I heard the sound of chains and footsteps.
I turned my head towards the sound and saw a strangely familiar man, hooded to cover his identity, pulling a chain out from the little room in the back of the barn. That's the room where dad keeps all of his tools. He always kept that room soundproof and never put any lights in it, so I never went in there. Darkness has always made me feel a little terrified. You never know what's sitting there watching you in the dark.
I followed the chain to see where it ended, and my heart was instantly set on fire. I saw Simon, all bloody faced and fragile. He looked starving and in dire need of a shower. My blood started to pump faster throughout my body, heating up as my anger grew. I felt my skin start to turn a shade of pink, almost red. His eyes met mine and they immediately widened. He started to say something, but the hooded man jammed his foot into Simon's stomach. That's it. I've had enough.
"DAD! What in the angel are you doing? Let him go." I need to be smart with what I'm going to do. If I want this to end out well at all then I have to keep my head on. Father smiled and I knew my reaction was exactly what he wanted.
"Oh darling. Please calm down. Let's talk." He waved his hand ushering me to come up to the table. I held my ground, staying in my spot. I need to see what he will do. "Have it your way then." He nodded at the hooded man and within seconds Simon was getting a beating.
"STOP. Now." I walked over to stand in front of the table and father smiled.
"Good. How was your injection? Tasty?" His eyes grew darker at the mention of my injection. His smile turned even more sinister than it already was, and I knew he was too far gone. There would be no helping my father this time.
"Tasty? Funny dad. I'm not here to talk about the injection I'm here to take Simon home." I wonder what Simon is thinking. I'm going to have a lot of explaining to do later.
"Short and to the point. I like it. Get up and do the routine." The routine. Oh the beloved routine. He taught it to me when I was a newbie at all the beating stuff. First I have to walk over to the chains, which are a couple of feet away from the tile, and then chain myself up. Both ankles in shackles, tight enough to make me uncomfortable. Next I have to stand with my arms raised making me look like a cross. From here I wait, father does the rest.
He stands up from the table, leaving the belt behind, and walks over to the wall on my left. There is a long chain connected to the wall that will soon be restraining my left arm. Once he's done on the left, he does the same to my right. This is the routine. It leaves me completely helpless, just how dad likes it.
"Much better. Does it feel good to be back?" He turns to grab the belt, and I know he is smiling like a child on Christmas right now. Sick bastard.
"Nice and cozy dad." I'm out of fucks to give. There's nothing I can do now but hope that Magnus and Jace can get Simon out of here. I wonder where they are. They're about to have a show, that's for sure.
"Let's begin then. Now remember to repeat what I say in your head okay?" I nod in agreement and look over at Simon. The horror on his face makes me want to hide. He'll never see me the same after this. I'll just be some weak girl that doesn't stand up for herself. "Let it take you over. Let it take you over. Let it take you over." He repeats this a couple more times until it's playing through my head like a song on repeat.
Dad goes to the back of me so that I can't see what he's going to do. I know it's coming, but I don't know when. After what seems like eternity I feel my skin sting as he whips the belt into my back. I let out my oh so familiar scream and my knees go weak. The chains are now the only thing keeping me from hitting the concrete and sadly I'm thankful for them. He comes down again only harder this time. I feel blood dripping down my back already. Great. I'm going to feel amazing tomorrow.
After a good fifteen whips my dad stops. Thank the angel, I thought he was never going to stop. I look up to see Simon still there, eyes so wide they are almost popping out of his sockets. Where are Jace and Magnus and why aren't they doing their job?
My dad comes around from behind me and walks over to Simon. Grabbing him by the shoulders, he drags Simon over to me. "Let it take over you Clary, or else." Fear encircles my body, he's going to hurt Simon again. What do I do? He pulls a syringe out of his pocket and I try my hardest to release myself of the chains. He smiles and lowers the syringe down, plunging it into Simon's skin. I hear his gasp and scream.
"NO. I did everything you asked. Please anything but this. Please." He pulls the syringe out slowly and sets in on the table. I let out a huge breath of relief, but soon I'm filled with fear again. My father smiles.
"Anything? I can do with anything." His smile grows as he waves the hooded man over. I forgot he was over there. "Do you remember what I asked of you earlier?" The hooded man nods. "Do it." I wonder if this is going to be worse than the syringe.
The hooded man walks up behind Simon and slowly raises his hands up to his hood. He pushed back quickly and the hood falls behind his head. Raphael? I feel myself go white. This is bad. This is way worse than the syringe. What have I done?
"Raphael? Please don't do this." Why is he helping my dad? Oh Simon I'm so sorry…I'll never forgive myself for this. Raphael's eyes fill with sorrow. I think he is being forced to help my father, but still I'm angry he would help him.
"I have no choice Clary. He has a member from my clan. They have tortured her enough. I'm their leader…I have to protect my people." He looks away from my burning glare and up at the ceiling. "Oh Dios mio…forgive me." Everything felt like it was in slow motion. Raphael met my eyes once more and I could see how sorry he already was. He bent down, sinking his fangs into my best friend. Simon's screams filled every inch of the barn, and my tears started pouring. Raphael lifted his head and proceeded to feed Simon his blood.
I felt my vision go blurry and my heart stop beating. Was I dying? No. Was I flying? I think so. I don't know what's happening but all of a sudden memories of Raphael come into my head. Father first introduced us when I was eight years old. He wanted to educate me in vampires, and meeting the clan leader was the best way. Raphael and I became pretty good friends after that. I used to meet with him some nights when I wanted to talk to someone other than Simon. He would always tell me to keep living while I was living. That was his favorite thing to say to me.
He told me his life story and about how he was turned. He promised to keep all of my secrets secret, so I told him about my father. He was the only person that knew everything my dad did to me. At first he wanted to rip his throat out, but at the time I told Raphael my dad was getting help in Idris. He was protected. I had gotten a lot of issues from the events of my past and Raphael helped me get my head on straight. Raphael became like an older brother to me, always giving me advice and helping me when I was in trouble. The last time I saw him was two weeks ago…the day Simon stopped talking to me. I went to Raphael and he comforted me until I calmed down. If Simon wasn't my best friend, Raphael would be next in line.
Raphael turned Simon into…into a vampire right in front of me. He crammed his fangs into Simon's skin and stole his humanity. He broke the accords. He broke my best friend. He broke me.
I started to come back from my thoughts. My vision began to come back, but it was different. Through my left eye everything was dark almost completely black, and through my right eye everything was blinding white. I could still see everything perfectly, actually better than usual, but the colors were just different in my eyes. I looked around and my gaze fell upon Raphael. He looked red through my left eye with black surrounding him, and through my right he looked like a yellow blob surrounded by white. I wonder what this means. I wonder what is happening to me.
Raphael let out an ear busting scream as I looked at him. I started to smell smoke, and thought there was a fire, but then I realized it was Raphael. He was burning from my gaze, literally. I quickly looked away and the burning stopped. Hmmm interesting. I found my father and he was laughing while staring up at me.
"Finally! Yes yes yes. I have been waiting for so long, I knew you had the power. I just had to hurt someone you loved to get it out of you!" While my father was celebrating I was taking it all in. I guess I let my power take over me, but I'm still not quite sure what it even is. I turn around and realize I'm no longer in my chains…and I'm floating. I'm hovering about 4 feet off the ground. I wonder why. I hear a large gasp coming from the loft area of the barn and turn to it. I sense two figures behind one of the hay bales. It must be Jace and Magnus…but how can I see them if they are under Magnus' spell.
Magnus stands looking right at me. Once he notices that I see him back his eyes widen to the size of grapefruits. He doesn't say anything, just raises his hands in the air and slowly goes back to hiding behind the hay bale. He was acting like a prisoner and I was the police. I wouldn't hurt Magnus! He should know that.
I turn back around and see Simon lying unconscious on the ground next to an injured Raphael. My poor Simon I just wish I could take back what Raphael did. I'm so sorry. This is all my fault. No, this is all Raphael's fault. No…this is daddy's fault. I turn to the left to look at my dad again. Still celebrating. I feel my left eye fuzzing into my right, and notice that I can no longer see blinding white through my right eye. Everything is pitch black and red now. I lower myself until my feet are touching the ground and then I walk over to my father. This is glorious. My Clarissa has finally made some progress. Now we just need to find out how to make her take her human form again. Maybe more pain towards Simon would work.
What. Just. Happened. My father wasn't talking and those were not my thoughts…were those my dad's thoughts? Oh. My. Angel. I can read his mind. I can hear his thoughts. This is like Silent Brother power…and I have it. Yeah that's right. I'm Clary Morgenstern, a woman with Silent Brother abilities. Take that world.
I look my father in the eyes and feel my body moving by itself. Soon fear appears upon his face as I strike him with a power I have never seen. It was like I had a sword connected to my body and it just defeated him. I see blood on his right arm where I cut him. He's clutching to his wound and is now on his knees in front of me.
"Now is not your time to die shadowhunter. Soon you will meet your fate, but now I have business to attend to." I just said that…right? That came out of me…but I don't remember saying it. I guess my powers speak for themselves? Maybe I have an alternative personality now and they are in control. Or maybe I'm dead and just imagining this. Yeah that's probably more likely. Is this what death is like? Reliving the last moments of your life and seeing what could have happened if you lived and just happened to be a freakish magician lady.
I hit a hard surface. My entire body crumbling to the ground. I struggle to keep my eyes open as I hear someone calling my name. Jace? He falls to the ground where I am and pulls me into his safe arms. I can see that he is saying my name over and over again but I can't hear him. A tear rolls down his face, but it's a dark blue color. Dark blue tears? What does that even mean? I'm probably just hallucinating it. Hopefully they can get us out of the barn and back to Magnus' house without my help. The last thing I see before the darkness takes me is Magnus standing over Jace and me looking paler than I'd ever thought humanly, or should I say warlockly, possible. Then I'm out.
So a lot just went down! We found out that Raphael and Clary have grown up being best buds and Valentine just went all psycho on everyone! I wonder what's wrong with Jace's tears? I guess we will find out later! Thanks again for reading I hope you enjoyed this crazy filled chapter!