A/N: Just the usual - thank you to my reviewers - you guys simply rock! And Katy of course, my beloved beta-reader, I'm glad you liked the chapter, too!

XXX

January 1st, 2000

It is amazing how a simple kiss, when being shared with the right person, can change the world into a better place. Alicia's mind was completely blank and all that was left was an overwhelming physical need to be as close to George as possible. He seemed to be feeling the same.

When the kiss ended and they were both still breathless, Alicia vaguely noticed Angelina watching them through the window with what looked like a worried expression. But she seemed to be the only person among the crowd who had noticed. Katie had vanished off somewhere looking for Lee, and most of the other people Alicia didn't even know.

She turned her attention back to George and for moment she didn't know if she should turn around and run away or stay and throw herself into his arms.

George finally made the decision for her. He grabbed her arm, not exactly gently, but for some reason Alicia didn't mind, and pulled her close again.

"Let's get away from here," he whispered hoarsely, making shivers run down Alicia's spine.

"Where to?" she breathed, her voice almost failing her completely.

"Dunno. Somewhere we where we're alone. My place? Your place?"

"Mine," said Alicia although in the back of her mind she knew that it was probably a mistake. This could end up making everything worse. But it was too late – she had reached the state where thinking rationally was no longer possible. All she wanted now was to be alone with George and have him do the things to her he used to do. Things she had never really managed to forget.

A couple of minutes later they had Apparated in front of Alicia's home, and she let them in.

"Missed you," George groaned into her ear, making her shudder with pleasure.

"Missed you too," she managed to get out between frantic kisses.

The love-making that followed was probably the most intense experience Alicia had ever had. When it was over it left them both breathless and exhausted, but more satisfied than they had been in a long time.

George was still touching her, his arm draped over her, his hand loosely wrapped around hers as they lay, side by side, on her bed. Suddenly she had no idea how she could bear living without him again. How she had made through the eleven months without him she didn't know.

But everything was good now. He was there now. Several minutes later Alicia must have fallen asleep.

When she woke up it was still dark outside. At first she couldn't remember – something felt different. But what? What had happened?

Moonlight came streaming in through the windows, allowing her to see the clock on the wall opposite her bed. It told her it was only five in the morning. Then she realised that she was not alone but squashed up against a warm, solid body that was lying next to hers – and that was when she remembered what had happened.

And you're no longer feeling lonely.

But was really a good idea what they had just done? She turned over in bed. There he was sleeping soundly on his front, one arm still draped across Alicia's back, the other one buried under the pillow.

It was the first time in a long time she had seen him sleeping as peacefully as he was now. After Fred's death George had often been plagued by nightmares – on other nights he hadn't slept at all. Of course he had never wanted her to know, but there had been no way he could hide it. After a while Alicia had started having trouble getting to sleep, too. Those had been long exhausting nights – that made both of them feel more tired the next day than they had had all night. And the worst thing about it was how it had been hard for her not to blame him.

Of course there had been other reasons that had made her break up. But it was impossible to think of any of them now. And she didn't want to think of them, either. In fact this was the happiest she had felt in months.

You two could start over, said the voice in the back of her mind. Give it a chance – he needs you as much as you need him. Oh – how she wanted to give in, but one night didn't make up for the problems they had had.

Just at that moment George gave grunt in his sleep and tightened his grip on her, pulling her closer. A couple minutes later Alicia fell asleep again too.

The next time she woke up it was a quarter to eleven and it was raining outside. Her flat was on the top floor, directly under the roof, so she could hear the raindrops falling on the slates. Looking through the window she saw that the sky that had been clear at night was now grey and cloudy.

George was still asleep. Carefully Alicia slid out from his embrace to get up without waking him up. She was still naked. Quickly she picked some fresh clothes from her wardrobe and pulled them on, before collecting her things from last night that were strewn across the floor. After she had tidied up and put George's clothes neatly on a chair by the window she went into the kitchen to make breakfast for them.

Alicia sighed. She was dreading the moment when George would wake up as much as she was longing for it. They had to talk about what had happened, and Alicia didn't really know what she was going to say to him. It was clear of course that they couldn't just go back to being together as if nothing had ever happened.

"Licia?"

She turned around, startled.

He was standing in the doorway, tousle-haired and in his shorts, holding an green Quidditch t-shirt in his hands. "I found that on a stack of fresh laundry," he said, holding the shirt up. "Looks about my size. Can I borrow it? I can't wear that shirt from last night again."

"It's yours," said Alicia. "I've been wanting to give it back to you, but I kept forgetting." It wasn't quite the truth – in fact she had wanted to give it back to him but had been afraid to face him. Something about the look he gave her made her think that he knew it.

"Why did you wash it?"

"Because I, er, used it to sleep in the other day." It had still smelled of him, making her cry all night. "I didn't think you were missing it after so many months."

George grinned. "No, I don't even remember owning a shirt like this," he said and pulled it over his head. "Sure it's mine? Could belong to that other bloke –"

"No," Alicia cut him off, curtly, "it's definitely yours. Evan kept his clothes on when he was here the other night. Besides, that shirt wouldn't have fit Evan, anyway."

"Oh, yeah, right – he was almost twice my size, wasn't he?" said George sarcastically. "And to think I was seriously considering beating him up –"

"You wouldn't have stood a chance," said Alicia shaking her head, but couldn't help being amused. "Not that I think beating somebody up has ever solved anyone's problems," she said in a sarcastic tone. She saw him open his mouth to object and added, "Neither does duelling of course."

There was silence after that was finally broken by both of them, speaking at the same time, "We need to talk."

"You first," said George, nodding encouragingly.

But Alicia shook her head. She didn't really know where to start, and the familiar knot in her stomach was forming again. One part of her wanted to throw herself at George, wrap him tightly in her arms and cry her eyes out for the last couple of months when she had missed him so badly – but there was another part that wanted desperately to make sure that she wasn't going to get hurt again.

Finally she drew a deep breath and said, "You know that last night does not mean we're back together, don't you?"

"I thought you would say that," said George. "And I agree. But – and please be honest – did it at least mean you might be ready to give me another chance?"

"I don't know that yet," admitted Alicia, avoiding his eyes. She turned back to her bacon and eggs, which she nearly had forgotten on the stove. They had started to smell burned.

George had noticed, too. "Woah, what's that smell?"

"It was supposed to be our breakfast," said Alicia in a thin voice trying not to burst into tears. Why was everything she touched going wrong?

"Our breakfast?"

"Yeah," said Alicia, managing a little laugh through her tears that were already running down her face now. "I was going to ask you to stay for breakfast. We really need to talk. Besides," she added in a lighter tone, trying to make it sound like she was making a joke, "Godric knows you can't cook – somebody has to make sure you're properly fed once in a while."

George grinned. "Well, there's always my Mum," he said.

Alicia didn't reply.

"So you still care about me then?" he added in a serious tone. "Tell me, because I still care about you, too. A lot actually."

"How can I not care about you?" she mumbled, turning back to the food to see what she could save of it.

"Then why can't we try again? I promise I will do my best. I won't hurt you again. – I mean, I never meant to hurt you in the first place."

"I know."

"Then why can't you just forgive me?"

Alicia whirled around, angrily. "You don't get it, do you?" she shouted, her desperation getting the better of her. "This is not about forgiving. I can forgive you in a heart beat, George. I know you never meant to make me feel bad."

"But what is it about then?" he asked, sounding edgy now. "What can I do to make you trust me again?"

Breathing heavily Alicia thought about how to put it into words. The right ones just didn't come. She could see that George was getting anxious. He had started pacing up and down the kitchen floor and she tried frantically to think of something to say to him.

"I need you to talk to me. About Fred. And the pain of losing him." There. She had fianlly said it. It had been easy after all. The hard part was yet still to come, of course – George's reaction.

"Talk to you? About – Why?" he said, stopping his pacing abruptly.

"See, that's what I meant," shouted Alicia, pointing her finger at him. "You still avoid saying his name. You still can't tell me about your feelings."

"It's not because of you," objected George, his voice sounding just as angry as hers now. "I trust you – I just don't want to talk this through at all, okay? Not with you and not with anybody else. Is that so impossible to understand?"

"But you have to talk about it," shouted Alicia, desperate to get through to him.

But she could see that it was senseless – he was shutting down again, like always, when somebody started on the topic. Alicia didn't let go. "I don't care if you talk to me or Ginny or maybe your mother – I mean I would prefer it to be me. But you really, really have to confide in somebody."

He didn't answer, just stared at her, his eyes livid.

"George, please – it's been one and a half years. You have to move on."

"I have moved on!"

"No, you haven't. You're just trying to make everybody think you have. But you haven't really. And to be honest, I wouldn't care so much if you were just lying to me. But you're lying to yourself, George. That's the real problem."

The colour had drained from his face and he averted his eyes to look to the ground, his anger seemingly had faded. "It –" he started to say, paused, and went on, "I can't – it's just –"

"Yes?" said Alicia soothingly. Again she wanted to walk over and wrap her arms around him, but she knew that with the mood he was in now, he wouldn't allow her to do that.

"I can't talk about it," he finally said, hesitantly. "It just hurts so much. Every time I think about him it makes me wanna scream with pain. Physical pain, really. I don't think I can take it. Why don't you get it?"

"Because it doesn't help keeping it all bottled up."

"It's easier."

"No, it's not. Remember the first week after he died? You let my hold you when you cried. I think it helped you, that I was there. It's much easier if you share the pain with somebody else. Then all of a sudden you shut me out."

"It hasn't helped at all," said George angrily. "It didn't make me feel any better. I made me feel worse. And it didn't bring him back either, did it? So what's the point?"

"You weren't alone with it."

"I wouldn't be alone now if you came back to me."

"I want to, but you need to let me in. I can't go on watching you suffer without being able to help you. I can't go on being with you if you keep pushing me away all the time. Let me in, George. Or our ways will part again – in spite of what happened last night."

George sighed looking exhausted. For a long moment he just stood there wordlessly, long deep breaths being the only thing she could hear. Some of them sounded almost like sobs but his eyes were dry. His anger was fading. "What do you want me to do?" he asked, quietly, looking her straight in the eyes.

"I dunno," said Alicia, shrugging. She hadn't thought so far. "How about we just sit down for breakfast and you share some memories of Fred with me? Tell me something about him, maybe some prank the two of you pulled? It might hurt now thinking about it, but it will soon get better. You'll see."

He stared at her for so long that part of her was actually starting to believe that she had finally gotten through to him but then he turned around. "I'm sorry. But I can't."

He walked back into the bedroom and grabbed his clothes and Disapparated, leaving Alicia alone with tears running down her cheeks once more.

XXX