Chapter 5

Free Me Tonight

"You know..." Hinata finally said a bit more quietly than intended. They had been walking through the forest for quite some time now, and neither of them had said a word, nor had they collected one piece of firewood. Every time Hinata stole a glance Naruto's way, his mouth was a carved frown, and his eyes were lowered. His hands were shoved into his pockets and she could hear him mumble every now and then. "...if you...that is, if you were to want to go after Sasuke right now...I...I wouldn't stop you, Naruto..." He looked at her at this point.

"Hinata..." He breathed. She looked down.

"I understand...how you feel..." She whispered. "To have someone you thought of as family treat you like nothing and abandon you..." She felt a shiver run through her spine and her eyes began watering. "...to...to want to be recognized for your accomplishments, but be constantly overshadowed by another...I know how that..." A lump began to grow in her throat, "I know how that feels, Naruto..." The blonde-haired boy, who had to this point been staring at her wide-eyed, looked down as well, and both their paces slowed considerably.

"So..." She choked out, "So if y-you wanted to go...I wouldn't stop you, like Kakashi wanted me to...if you wanted t-to go...I'd e-even go...w-with you if th-that's what y-you wanted..." She felt the tears finally overflow as the memories of her own childhood flooded her mind. "I...I just want you to...to know that...Naruto..." She finished. After this was said, she didn't dare look at him, not when she was crying. But because she didn't look, she was all the more surprised to feel something brush her cheek. Startled, she looked to see that Naruto had extended his hand over and was gently brushing away her tears.

"Hinata..." He said with a small smile, "Don't cry for me..." She felt her face warm up as she stared at his hand, which continued to fight back her tears. She felt like she couldn't breath at all, like she would suffocate if his hand remained there, but at the same time, she never wanted it to leave. She wanted to cry even more even just for the sole purpose of it meaning his hand would never leave.

"If I were to leave right now...and try to catch up to him. There's no way I could beat him, even with you there too. Not while he's with those other people. I want to go and find him more than anything right now. I want to leave right now and just...just find some way to bring him back. But...I'm not a kid anymore. I know that would just be suicide. I can't just rush into things this time...not like last time..." Naruto's voice trailed off and Hinata felt her heart fill with warmth. She had always admired Naruto's strength, even when he was young, and to see him mature like this...it was almost too much.

"But you're not alone this time..." She said after a small period of silence. She finished wiping her tears away and smiled at him. "This time, you've got Kakashi...and Chouji..." She paused, her heartbeat quickening, "...and you've got me." Suddenly, Hinata found that it was no longer difficult to speak around Naruto. Even like this, while they were alone together in the woods at night, with him right next to her, she somehow felt at ease. She felt...brave. Naruto blinked, and then he grinned for the first time since they left.

"Yeah, I guess I do." He sighed a relieved breath, and his mood seemed to have lifted up. "Thanks, Hinata..." He continued, "You always...I don't know...you just always seem to know just the right thing to say to cheer me up...You're the best, Hinata." He laughed a little bit and again the two fell silent. Hinata was at a loss for words. iThe best?!/i That's what he had said...he said she was...

Suddenly, Hinata felt her face cool off and her mind returned to Sakura's hospital room. There was a reason she had insisted on being with Naruto's group. She had to do it! It was the perfect time to do it! If she didn't do it now, she most likely wouldn't get a second chance. It seemed as though every nerve-ending in her body was screaming at her to make her move, and despite both her mind and her heart racing she felt somehow calm at the same time. Yes, this was the right time. Finally, the right time had come. She had to tell him...

"Naruto..." She started, her voice was a whisper, and at first she wasn't sure if he had even heard her. But then she sensed his eyes on her, and knew she had his attention. "...actually, I-I'm really jealous of you..."

"Jealous? How come?" Naruto asked. She still couldn't bring herself to look at him.

"Well, I...um, it's just..." at that moment, the bravery from before returned to her, and the words suddenly formed in her mouth, "We've known each other for a long time, right? And, I couldn't help but notice this...Naruto, you...you're really brave..." The words slid out nearly effortlessly. She could already predict his response, and her next words were already forming.

"Brave? Heh heh, well..." He grinned, "Why do you say that?"

"Because when you were little, I watched you, Naruto..." Her words came out without a single stutter, and she knew they couldn't be stopped now, "I watched the turmoil you went through...the way the other villagers treated you..." Naruto looked down as his own memories came to him, "...and I wanted to help you, to step up and be your friend, Naruto...to stop your pain..." She paused, putting together exactly how to say the next part, "But I couldn't. I wasn't...brave enough. Even though you were being put through all of that, and I was standing right there, on the sidelines, I couldn't do anything. I couldn't do anything but watch you suffer..." She felt that painful lump returning, and she knew she had to finish soon or she would be unable to talk at all, "As a child, even through Ninja Academy, I just watched you from the background, wanting in my heart to help you...to be there by your side when others picked on you. When you got in trouble by Iruka-sensei, I wanted to be right there, getting in trouble with you. Anything, I wanted to do anything at all, just to help share your burden. But my feet were frozen and my tongue was bound. I don't know why, but I could never do it..."

"Hinata..." Was all Naruto could say. She still couldn't look at him...

"All this time, as we became genin, even up through the chuunin exams and when the Third Hokage died, I couldn't do anything more than give you a simple 'Hi' or a shy 'Hello'...no matter how much pain I could see you going through. That's why I'm jealous of you, Naruto. And I'm a little ashamed. All this time, you've grown up driven by your own will, driven by your own dreams...you didn't let anyone defeat you! No matter what they called you or what they did to you...you always kept going by your own power." The tears were returning, "While I...while I...I was so weak...that I looked up to you for strength. I had no confidence of my own, so all I could do was take confidence from you...use your strength as my own...because I had no strength of my own..." It was all pouring out now. Everything she had pent up inside over the years was released, and everything she had felt was leaving her lips beyond her control. Naruto had fallen completely silent, astonished that all this was coming from Hinata. Shy, little Hinata...

"When Sasuke left Konoha, and you returned from that mission empty-handed, I was so torn to see you in that kind of pain. Even if you tried to smile through it, I could always see the pain in your eyes. And still...I did nothing. I...I couldn't even say goodbye when you left with Jiraiya!" It was too much. Even though she couldn't stop them from coming, these words were her feelings, and like daggers, they were tearing her up inside as they forced their way out. She began crying freely now, no longer able to stop the oncoming tears, and raised her hands to her face in attempt to keep them at bay. Because of this, she was forced to fall silent for a moment. And in that moment, she felt two arms circle around her and pull her close to the body. Before she realized what was happening, Naruto had pulled her into an embrace.

"It's okay, Hinata. You didn't have to say goodbye..." He paused as she forced her sobs to quiet enough to hear him properly. "In fact, it's a good thing you didn't. I don't know if I can handle any more goodbyes, especially from you..." He whispered. She was stunned. Was it possible? All this time, had he really noticed her?! Could he really...? But, the words weren't done coming out of her mouth, and now that she had her tears under control, they were ready to come out again.

"But..." She started, looking up at him. For some reason, even though she could hear his heart beating, it was that close, she didn't feel embarrassed. Her face remained cool and her heart even began slowing down. "But Naruto! I...not even once did I help you! Not once...! All I could do was watch! I'm so weak..." She sobbed, "Even after you returned with Jiraiya after three years of training. All that time I had trained myself as hard as I could. I wanted to be stronger! I wanted to be able to welcome you back with open arms! And instead...instead I fainted at the first sight of you! I...couldn't...I'm still not strong enough...I still can't help you...I'm...useless..." Hinata hadn't even gotten to telling him her feelings for him, and already she could barely speak. Her lips felt numb, and her legs felt weak. To her astonishment, Naruto somehow saw her ability to stay upright was shaking, and still hugging her tightly, he lowered both of them to the ground, leaning his back against a tree.

"You're not weak, Hinata..." Naruto started, but she was too upset to listen.

"I am...I am Naruto..." One final push of tears came out of her as the most built up and strongest feelings forced their way from her heart and out her mouth, "I'm not even strong enough to tell you how I feel!" She cried, "Even after all this time, I can't even tell you that...that..." By sheer force of habit, her mouth hesitated at the mention of those sacred words. Countless nights had been spent dreaming of how she would finally tell him. But none of those dreams were like this...this was a nightmare. There was nothing romantic about the situation at all, not like she had dreamed, and she was a mess of tears. Even if she told him now, there's no way he'd return her feelings when she was like this. This wasn't...beautiful. But still, the last drop of the great waterfall of emotion sprung from her, completely outside of her own will.

"I love you." Her voice was a hoarse whisper, the lump in her throat nearly suffocating her. But, through all her emotional turmoil, Naruto still embraced her tightly. With those three words, Hinata's heart had left her. She felt lightheaded and sick to her stomach, and in her drained state, could not say any more. And so the two of them fell silent. Everything she had ever wanted to say to the "Maverick Ninja" was out in the open now. Her heart was on a silver platter, presented to Naruto for him to make a choice. Either he would accept the dish as it sat before him, bleeding and beating, or he would send it back to the kitchen, disgusted by its revolting appearance, and astonished by the sheer gesture of such a thing.

It was a long while after she said those last words before Naruto spoke again. Her tears seemed to have simply run out before then, and so they both just sat there, in the everlasting embrace, under that tree, in silence. She still wanted to cry. As she waited anxiously for his next words, she just knew he would rebuke her confession. She just knew he would tear her heart in two with his next words. She must appear so desperate. There was no way he'd ever......Then Naruto spoke at last.

"I know..." He said simply. Hinata's breath caught in her throat, and she pushed off of him enough to look at his face. "All this time..." He smiled down at her, "You didn't think I wouldn't notice such a strong bond? I didn't understand at first..." He paused, "But even I could feel you reaching out, in your own way...in your own way, you've always been there for me, been there with me..." His smile widened a bit, nervously, "I've always felt it...I'm just, sorry I didn't realize what it was sooner. I'm sorry, Hinata."

Then, like some kind of dream, Naruto let his head fall downward until his lips met Hinata's, and they shared their first kiss.