Kagome can't remember what happened that cold winter's night when she was attacked. Nor can she remember who her attacker was. Her only clue is the baby she now carries within her womb. Inuyasha has a sneaky suspicion, and Kagome now wonders if her baby is even human.
'Baby of Mine'
"Deliver me, out of my sadness.
Deliver me, from all of the madness.
Deliver me, courage to guide me.
Deliver me, strength from inside me.
All of my life I've been in hiding.
Wishing there was someone just like you.
Now that you're here, now that I've found you,
I know that you're the one to pull me through.
Deliver me, loving and caring.
Deliver me, giving and sharing.
Deliver me, the cross that I'm bearing.
All of my life I was in hiding.
Wishing there was someone just like you.
Now that you're here, now that I've found you,
I know that you're the one to pull me through.
Deliver me,
Deliver me,
Oh deliver me.
All of my life I was in hiding.
Wishing there was someone just like you.
Now that you're here, now that I've found you,
I know that you're the one to pull me through.
Deliver me,
Oh deliver me.
Won't you deliver me."
He could taste something warm and salty... The taste was repulsive causing him to sputter and utter a silent cry of distaste. Eyes opening half way he found everything fuzzy and disfigured. Growling in irriatation he slowly sat up shaking his head slightly trying to refocuse his vision. It was then he realized he was upon the floor in his room, and alone for that matter. Where was the wench? Where was his son..? Instantly the vision of the wench came to mind. Long white hair, fangs, and...glancing down to his shoulder; claws. Damn her. He had misjudged her strength, but he wouldn't do it again. Raising a hand to his lips he quickly wiped away the blood, spitting the rest out to the floor. Letting his eyes finish refocusing he slowly stood up, using a small side table for some support. How the wench managaed to knock him out was far beyound him. All he knew was, she needed to be taught a lesson, and some manners for that matter.
Moivng to a large cabinet he quickly pulled out a dark blue kimono, with black trim. Changing out of his tattered robes he quickly changed into the other. The wounds she had inflicted upon him had healed completely, flickers of dried blood spattered here and there. His armor had been destroyed, sliced into two. He would need Jaken to have more made. Normally he would have instantly had Jaken here, but right now he didn't wish to wear any, and for another...He wanted to prove to her he wasn't scared of her. If he knew her well enough, she would be gloating about it now, guessing he himself would steer clear from her. Smirking he made his way over to the doors discarding his old and stained ones on the floor. Did she have another thing comming...
But...Damn...Why did she always affect him so? Why was it her who stirred him? Why was it every time she was with him, his heart quickened in pace, and he felt his blood boil? Was it some sort of spell? No...Such things would have little affect on him. But what was it? He had felt something with her when he first fought with her. She had, though he would never say it, scarred him. She had given birth to Inutaisho, a full bloodied demon without dying. Most humans would would have died trying to produce such a child. And then there was the fight in his chambers and then when he spoke to her in the dinning area. And then there was her transformation. He had sensed power, his power within her and it called out to him. but he willed himself to not loose control. And then now, the small battle in his bedroom again, only this time she had somehow over powered him. It had been a exotic battle indeed. She looked so angry her eyes flashing red with the blood of his clan racing through her veins. The mere thought sent chills down his spine. She was something...But he wasn't sure. But he did know...He was going to find out...
She had calmed down since then. She hadn't known what had come over her. One moment she was fine feeding Inutashio, and the next, all she wanted to do was Kill, kill, kill! And there was only one person that came to mind. Now, the only thing she thought of was her own life.
Kagome now sat in a small, curved room waiting...waiting for him. She had felt him awaken, angry and with dark intentions. He had been full of it, and it made her weary of what was to come next. Frowning she stood looking over to her son who was wide awake in a small hand made crib, reaching for a small mobile that hung in the air. Yoko had brought her here. She had explained it was a small nursery that Sesshoumaru himself had used. It had been his sanctuary when his Father was off on important business. He's mother too had always been on the go and by the age of twelve, she had decided to return back to the home of her father. So when his parent's were off on business, Sesshoumaru came here to pass the time, awaiting for their return. All around were small toys, shelves, playboxes, and much more. All a child could ever want yet... Yet by the sound of it, not nearly enough. She could feel it in the very room... Longing... Had he longed for more? Longed for something his parents had a hard time giving? The room's very essence emitted it's feelings to her calling out to her very soul. And though she didn't want to admit it, she understood this feeling very well. Gazing to the far left hand of the room she caught sight of a small table, papers scattered here and there. Making her way over she caught sight of a small blue ribbon. Rushing towards the table she scopped up the bow reconizing it as Shippo's. Had he been here? She glanced down at the pictures on the table curiously. They looked like they had been drawn by toddlers. Bending over she picked one up examining one carefully. Smiling she realized it was a picture of her, her son, Shippo, Rin and Sess.... Him. Rin must have drawn it. Shippo would never draw her and HIM in the same picture.
"Is everything alright Mi Lady?" Yoko asked stepping into the room and bowing lowly.
"Oh, Yes thank you," Kagome smiled laying the picture back on the small table. Everything is fine. "He's enjoying himself as am I."
"Is there anything I can get you?" The old woman asked hands moving to her small apron.
"Well... If it be possible... May I have some tea?" Kagome asked. "Tea usually settles my nerves."
"Of course Mistress, I will return shortly," Yoko smiled and bowed once more exiting the room.
Kagome returned back to her son's side and with a huff fell back onto a large coushoin. "I haven't been this nervous since I told Inuyasha I forgot to bring Ramen back from the future." Using her hand she pulled back her hair behind her pointy ear. "Damn it!" She swore letting her fingers trace it carefully. "I haven't gone back to normal yet!" Stomping her foot onto the marble floor she growled. What had Sesshoumaru done to her? It had to of been him. Who else would do such a thing to her? That jerk...How could he be so, so, cruel?
The sound of laughter down the hall shattered her thoughts. It sounded like children playing. Rin? Shippo? Most likely. She knew with the way Sesshoumaru was children were to be seen and not heard; all say for Rin of course. She prayed Shippo was having fun in a time like this. At least one of them were happy. Sighing she moved a finger to her lips biting it slightly in thought. "He's going kill me I just know it. WHY did I do that? Damn! If I know him, he will forget about keeping me around any longer. He will kill me for sure." Cursing under her breath she stood once more making her way over to her son who was laughing, his golden eyes shinning. He lay on his back trying hard to catch the small youkai sheep, cats and dogs on the mobile. He had not a care in the world. He didn't know what was going on, didn't know what trouble she was in. He was innocent, and careless. How she wished at this very moment she could be that way too.
Inutaisho seemed almost to read her mind glancing away from his mobile to her. His eyes held almost no trace of emotion say for a small glint, that twinkled at his mother. She studied the babe for a long moment comparing him to Sesshoumaru. He seemed more and more like his father as the days went on. He had grown a small bit since birth. Besides the tiny crescent moon on his forehead, he now dawned two faint colored neon pink strips on each cheek. They seemed to get darker and darker as the day passed. His tail seemed to have grown slightly but only enough for a mother to tell. And then his hair...His black hair had seemingly grown more than she had really taken notice to. But all of this really didn't seem to faze her. She expected as much from him. After all, he was the son of a powerful demon. A demon that drove her intensely insane! Why was he such a ass?! Arg...The mere thought of him made her want to just hit something hard. And yet, somewhere in the back of her mind there was a piece of her who told her she enjoyed it. ENJOYED?! Was she going insane??
No. For once she was being completely honest with herself. Being around that rude jack ass...It made her feel safe, protected. More so then Inuyasha had ever made her feel. When she was near him, her stomach always seemed to irk in some way or another. Her heart also seemed to speed up and her mind racing with so much emotion and questions she just wanted to run away and hide. But why? Especailly around him? Even when she wasn't herself, she could still feel these powerful emotions building in her. Screaming at her as if to rip her from the inside out. She couldn't remember the last time she felt so weak and strange near a man. Not even Inuyasha. Yes she would admit she had loved the Hanyou, but somewhere deep down she knew he would never love her as she did him. She knew he still held on to someone else; Kikyou. Although dead, he loved her. And though he seemed to care for Kagome... She knew that everytime he looked at her, he saw Kikyou. It was then she refused herself to fall for him any longer. He was in love with Kikyou and that was that. She could never change that and somehow she didn't want to. It was just the way things had to be.
Sesshoumaru on the other hand, besides the intense urge to rip his throat out, he seemed to make her feel so strangely and she would be lying if she said it was all bad. Sometimes she wondered though if his "I'm better than you act" was just to hide how he really felt. Sometimes, she thought she could see something within his eyes, but she had convinced herself it was nothing. HE WAS A DEMON LORD FOR HEAVEN'S SAKE! SO NO!
A small knock was heard as Yoko entered carrying a small tray with a small white cup. "Here you go Mi Lady, your tea," she smiled bowing once more. Kagome greatfully excepted the tea letting the warm soothing liquid flow down her thraot.
"Hmmm...that's good," she sighed closing her eyes and enjoying the taste.
"Is it to your requirements Mi Lady?" Yoko asked looking overly concerned.
"Oh it's fine, thanks," Kagome said taking another swig of the drink letting it's contents coat the back of her throat. She leaned back against the wall, smiling as she felt her body relax. "Yoko?"
"Yes my Lady," the old woman asked smiling happily.
"How long have you been here? I mean, in the service of Sesshoumaru that is," Kagome asked directing her attention at the old woman.
Yoko's smile widened and she chuckled. "Ever since I can remember my lady," she answered. "After hundreds of years your memories begin to fade slightly, but I have been with Lord Sesshoumaru since the day of his birth."
"That long..." Kagome whispered to herself.
"Please excuse me Mistess, but it would seem like a long time to a human," she laughed. "Youkai can live for hundreds of years, so time doesn't seem to faze us. We also age slower than humans do, so a hundred years to yourself may be like ten years for us."
"Ah yes," Kagome smiled taking another sip of her tea. I forgot about that."
"Beg your pardon Misstress, but might I inquire about your question?"
For a moment Kagome said nothing gazing upon the old cat demon. "In all your years with Sesshoumaru, has he ever smiled? And I don't mean, I have dark intentions smile, or killing makes me happy smile. Has he ever, truly smiled?"
Yoko's face fell at Kagome's words. "Everyone always seems to ask the same question about My Master," Yoko said softly. "It seems hard to believe that the fearful Lord of the West has a soft side." She took in a deep breath before continuing. "Lord Sesshoumaru was once, a happy child. He used to be so carefree and happy. But when his parents began to leave for long periods at a time, Sesshoumaru began to change. At the time, there had been a fued with the Lord of the East and North. Lord Sesshoumaru's father and mother had gone to try and help stop the fued before a war could break out.
FLASHBACK
"Master Sesshoumaru," a young woman called peeking her head into a large and grand toy room. Scanning the area she caught sight of a small boy, his white hair shining in the brightly lit room sitting alone at a table. Pens of various colors lay forgotten on the table as he stared intently upon one picture. Approaching she stopped short as she caught sight of the picture he held. He had somehow gotten a hold of a portrait of him and parents. Yet, they were no longer in the portrait. Instead, she caught the last remanants of his parents being burned away in green smoke. "Young Master?"
He jumped frightened, the picture falling to the floor forgotten. "Yoko!" he huffed trying to sound serious. "I told you many times not to surprise me!" She watched as he rubbed his eyes wiping away the remanants of his tears.
She smiled at the young boy, his white kimono covered in varities of pinks, blues, greens, and reds. He had been drawing again. "My apologies young master," she smiled bowing to the little boy. "I was worried when I could not find you." At her words his face instantly fell, his hard exterior gone. Instead he now looked completely lost, his large golden eyes betryaing him with a look of pure and utter hopelessness.
"I'm fine," he said turning around so he wouldn't have to face the cat woman. Yoko watched him take in a deep breath before he sunk back down to his kness at the table. Moving to the table as well she took a seat next to him, her eyes catching the forgotten photo under the table.
"May I draw with you?" she asked kindly picking up a black ink pen.
"You always do anyways," he said not bothering to look at her.
Glowing she took up a piece of paper and began to draw. Her brush strokes light and feathery as they traced across the paper. One by one, color after color she continued with her work. After a few minutes she chuckled realizing he was now watching trying to figure out what she was doing. "And now for the final touch," she said grabbing the black ink pen once more and making small V's in the sky. "There, all done!" His eyes were as large as saucers and he looked at her excited and delighted. "Do you like it?"
He gazed down at the picture again, nodding absentmindedly.
"Would you like it?" Yoko asked.
He nodded again holding out his small hands as she placed the picture in his hands. His eyes traced the beautiful colors, the greens, blues, and yellows. He always loved when Yoko would draw for him. He was little so he could never draw anything so pretty. So he always let her draw when he got out his pens. And each time the pictures were different. This time, he found himself staring at a small child he knew to be him riding a large unicorn.
"There now, you can show it to your parents when they get back tommorow evening," she cheered standing and collecting the pens in their case.
His eyes, at the mention of his parents fell. "Yoko..?" he whispered running his small hand over the picture.
"Yes little master?"
"Do, Do Dad and Mum like me?" he asked, his eyes turning up to search her's as if she had the answers he seeked.
The question starled her and she dropped the case, the pens falling onto the table and floor. "Young Master?" she asked completely stunned by his question. "Why would you ask me such a question?"
He shrugged, turning his eyes down to the burnt photo he had been holding earlier. "Curious I guess..."
"Of course they like you! They love you!" Yoko said, her voice rising.
The word love seemed to trigger something in the little boy as he snapped his head up and stood definatly. "Then why?!" he demanded tears forming in his large eyes. "Why aren't they here?! Why aren't they here again?! Why aren't they here on such an important day?! Why can't they be with me?!"
"S-Sesshoumaru," she gasped watching the tears fall from the little boy's face. Falling to her knees she wrapped her arms around the small boy sobbing uncontrollably. "Oh little one. They want to be here," she whispered. "They would rather spend their time with you then deal with issues on the East."
"T-Then why d-don't they?" he hiccuped burying his face into her shoulder.
"Dear one," Yoko said pulling away to face the small child. "What they do is for you. They want peace in these lands so they can spend all their time with you. They want you to grow up without any worries. So they go where they most to make sure you have a good and happy life. But their leaving doesn't mean they don't like you. They love you more than you will ever know."
His sobbing ebbed and he looked away wiping his eyes with his sleeve. "You mean it?" he asked.
"I promise," Yoko ensured him, kissing his cheek lightly. He smiled, quickly launching himself at the cat woman hugging her tightly. She hugged him back, a small smile on her face. "Happy Birthday Young Master."
"Thank y-you Yoko."
End Flashback
"To be honest, I don't think he smiled once after that day," Yoko said, wiping her eyes. "He understood what I was saying, but I think he blamed himself in some ways. But I still tried to encourage him, help him, and show him as much love as I could. I thought things would get better after that, but they didn't. The fued got worse between the East and the North, and his Parents ended up getting caught in the war. After that, Sesshoumaru rarely saw his parents. He understood that they needed to go, because they were trying to make a future for him. But they say war effects all, including children. Once the war was in full play Lord Sesshoumaru never stepped foot in the nursery. Instead, I would find him in his father's study going over maps, war plans, weapon techniques. And soon after that, all he wanted to do was train. He wanted to grow stronger in case anything were to happen to his parents. He had to grow up fast so he could rule the west if they fell. After eighteen months of warring the war ended. However, the small loving Lord I has once known was no more."
Kagome stood there tense, listening, holding onto every words.
"At one point, I thought things would go back the way they were," Yoko admitted gazing down at the floor. "Ten years after the war, Lord Sesshoumaru had begun to relax again. Though he didn't smile, I could see he was starting to enjoy the company of his parents. But, those peaceful times didn't last long. Inukimi recieved word soon after her father had died. Being of noble inu blood, her father had ruled a small clan just south. Having been an only child Inukimi had no choice but to take command. She had wanted to stay, but honor and duty called her back home, and Inutaisho knew this. So, she left back to the home of her Father. A couple months later, Lord Inutaisho died himself in battle. After that, Lord Sesshoumaru became the well known "Killing Perfection."
Kagome didn't know what to say. Who would have known Sesshoumaru had, had such a hard lonely childhood? It was pitiful. To never really know one parent was hard enough. But both? She had lost her father at a young age, and thought her world was over. What would have happened has she of lost both? If anyone ever had felt alone, it had been him. Both he and Inuyasha knew truly what loneliness was. Both he and Inuyasha had never known the true and complete warmth of both parents. In that moment she felt as if all she had known, she had taken for granted.
"Please do not think badly of my master, Mistress," Yoko said sadly. "Everything he does is for a reason. He does mean well... He... He just doesn't know how to show how he really feels. I think in some small way, he is still a child. A lost child."
Kagome didn't have time to say anything as she felt the walls around her begin to shake. Yoko's eyes filled with horror as the trembling grew worse, pictures flying off the walls, shattering as they hit the marble floor. Kagome could feel a strong presence heading her way quickly. He comes... And just as sudden as the trembling as started it stopped, silence filling the room. And then...
BAM! The doors to the nursery had been ripped from their hinges and there he stood, growling menacinly; eyes locked souly on her.
SMASH
The loud noise had scared the little cat woman badly and she had dropped the glass try on the floor. "Oh my, Oh my," Cried Yoko falling to her knees, picking up the shattered tray. "Master I'm so sorry. Please forgive my clumsiness."
He seemed to not even slightly care about the glass try, merely Kagome. His eyes were fixed on her and she could feel his anger radiating into the room. Startled by his mere presence, Kagome dropped her cup, shattering on contact with the floor. Her mouth was wide with shock and fear, her heart quickening it's pace. There before her stood a very angry looking Taiyoukai. She could hear Inutaisho crying now, the load noise had startled him. But she couldn't move, she was frozen in fear.
"Yoko..." Sesshoumaru said suddenly causing the old youkai to stand before him quivering in fear. "Leave it, and take Inutaisho somewhere...safe."
"Safe?" Kagome thought watching the old woman wince at his harsh tone.
Yoko wasted no time as she left the shattered glass and moved to the crib pulling the babe within her arms and exiting the room without as much as a question. Sesshoumaru didn't turn, but rather used his foot to kick a large stuffed animal out of his path as he made his way towards her. Toy after toy went flying; some shattering other's she knew would never squeak again. "S-Sesshoumaru..." She whispered feeling her space run out her back pressing up against the wall firmly. "I didn't mean it... I don't know what came over me...I-I honestly don't know what h-happened!"
He said nothing but moved closer to her, each step matching the pace of her heart. He was going to kill her... She knew it! And even if she wanted to fight him, he wouldn't let his guard down this time. She was done for. There was nothing she could do. She felt him reach her, his body inches from her's, her breath rough and unsteady. She closed her eyes waiting for his strike, waiting for him to tear her throat. He would have Inutaisho after all... She waited for his strike, but it never came. She just stood there eyes closed. After a few moments she opened her eyes raising her head to look into his dark face.
"Do you believe you are stronger than I?" he asked lowly. She couldn't read his eyes, his face a mask, hiding all emotion. And before she knew it he had slammed a hand into the wall, inches from her face. Kagomr cried out in horror, feeling the wall behind her shake. She felt her body shaking, fear enveloping her entire being. Her legs shook, uncontroably. Where was her courage now? Why couldn't she find it? "Do you believe me below you?" he asked again, and then, his other hand had crashed into the wall on her other side, a snarl ripping from his throat. Kagome could hear pieces of marble falling to the floor beneath her and she felt her legs give way sliding down the wall in a cowering heap.
His eyes followed her as she knelt before him. The place a wortless human should be. She was shaking, her face pale white, all color gone from her small frame. He basked in her cowardice, knowing she was fearing the wrost. She was right to fear him. She was right to fear for her life. He was Lord Sesshoumaru!
Moving a hand from the wall and down to her form, he graped her kimono under her chin and hoisted her back to her feet pushing her into the wall before him. She said nothing almost as if excepting this as her fate. Was she giving up? This woman? The woman who had openly defied him? Removing his other hand from the wall he grasped her chin in his large hands, feeling the softness of her skin forcing her to look at him.
"I see your tongue has found another place to stay," he challenged looking smugly upon the wench before him. Her hair was a deep raven black, still long from her previous transformation. Covering her long pointed ears, it fell to the ground beneath, curling at the tips. Her once honey brown eyes were long gone, bathed in a molten gold. She didn't look too different from when he had gone to retrieve her, but he knew she wasn't the same as before. He had to be careful. "Tell me... What do you think the punishment is for a unworthy mate?" he asked cruely, a evil sadistic grin crossing his fine features. "Affliction or.... A Life?" She couldn't say anything. She merely stood there, her eyes wide with horror. She felt his clawed hand trace down her chin to her throat; blood spilling lightly upon her pale skin. She watched his face in muteness as the smell of blood assaulted his nose; his eyes flashing red for a moment. And then it was gone as his face quickly contorted, a bestial grin forming over his fine features.
At no response he leaned in to the freshly open wound and she felt his mouth press against it, tasting first then latching on, sucking greedily at her throat. She felt a jolt run through her entire body sending what felt like electricty through her. And unwillingly bucked herself into him mouth open in a silent plea. He instantly responded crushing her against him running his tongue up and down her throat. She felt the hand that had held her prisoner move to her neck tilting it further to the side allowing him further excess; the other grasping a handful of her hair. He held her there, sucking on her given life force, low growls emmiting deep in his throat. Was he going to suck her dry?! She felt his fangs graze her skin snapping her back into reality and she found her voice crying out, desprate to break free. She pushed against him, trying to free herself from his clutches, but he was unmovable.
"S-Stop... S-Sesshoumaru.... STOP!" she screamed finding enough strength to push him off her. Kagome stood there clutching her throat eyeing the demon Lord. The whites of his eyes were now a deep crimson red, like the liquid clinging to his lips. He chuckled darkly, and instanly he was before her again pinning both of her hands above her head in one of his. He hovered over her, like a predator, staring intently upon her as if she was something to eat. Then again, she probably was to him. And then, he took a step forward, closing the gap between them once again, his hot body pressing up against her's. She gasped at the close contact wriggling to free herself once more.
"I wouldn't do that if I were you," he warned moving his nose into her hair, inhaling deeply.
Talk... She had to keep him talking! She had to work him back down to sanity!
"S-Sesshoumaru, I need to go check on Inutaisho," she said turning her head away from his bloody stare.
"He is fine," he snapped, his other hand moving to the top of her robes, running the tips of his claws over the exposed skin.
She shuttered at the contact and tried to reamin focused. She couldn't understand why even though her mind was screaming no, her body was telling her to go, go, go! She felt like her body had a mind of it's own responding to his touches like it was a good thing!
"Sesshoumaru..." she moaned as he let his lips move to the place his fingers had just been. "You... D-Don't... Want... This..." Kagome breathed heavily. "This isn't what you want. A h-human... You don't w-want another baby... p-pup!" she cried out as he nipped her skin with his fangs, drawing blood.
"Calling...blood..." she heard him mummur as he lapped up the blood with his tongue.
"Calling?" her mind quickly retraced the words remember exactly what call he was talking about. THAT CALL! "No! Stop! Sesshoumaru! Don't!"
He ignored her, grabbing the top on her kimono once more, this time ripping the top open to his view. His expression became greedy as he eyed the full mounds of flesh before him.
"Stop!" Kagome screamed this time kicking him with all the strength she could muster. "Don't! Don't rape me!" She felt tears falling down her cheeks trying to get through to the lust driven demon. "Don't rape me please!"
Rape? What was she talking about? She was purly ready to mate again. Her scent told him so. Her body wanted him, she wanted him. Why was she calling it rape? Sesshoumaru snarled feeling her kick him in the chest, stomach, then chest again. Why was she fighting him? He was willing. Was there a problem? Gazing up into her face he saw them... tears. She was crying? Why? He was doing what she wanted. Why would she cry?
"Don't rape me please!" he heard her scream again, and his movements stopped aburptly. Images flashed through his mind of an unwillingly raven haired woman before him, begging him to stop, yet he continued to do as he pleased.
His hands released her and she fell to the ground, shaking and trying to cover up as much as possible. His eyes widened, his entire being still, frozen with horror. Had he attempted to take her again?
She watched him, the red fading back to white in his eyes. He recongnized her now. He stood there for a moment gazing upon her and then, he was gone.
The room was silent say for her heavy breathing, her body aching and exhausted. Was that how he had planned on punishing her? Was he that angry he was really going to shame her again? The thought was too much to handle as she felt her body shudder, falling to her side. She watched as feet quickly made their way towards her, calling out to her. But by then, she had already given into the darkness.
I know I know. I've heard it before...I'm evil. But I can't help it! I love cliff hangers! Please don't hate me. I know this chapter is really short but I promise the next will be longer. Again, thanks for all the great reviews!