A/N: Thanks for the awesome reviews everyone! They were amazing! Keep them coming! This chapter is called Colorblind by Counting Crows which also just so happens to be one of my favorite songs in the entire world. Listen to it while you read. It really sets the mood. It was playing throughout the whole time I wrote this.

Disclaimer: I own nothing!

Chapter 3- Colorblind

I am colorblind
Coffee black and egg white
Pull me out from inside
I am ready, I am ready, I am ready
I am taffy stuck and tongue tied
Stutter shook and uptight
Pull me out from inside
I am ready, I am ready, I am ready
I am fine

Bella's POV

After his swim meet, we ended up going out to the clearing in the woods. His father let him borrow the Jeep again tonight. It was pretty much pointless for Edward to even have his own car when he never drove the thing. But like I said, Edward's parents were never really concerned about money.

We sat in the back hatch of his car with the rear door open, admiring the beauty of the night sky. It was so perfect and astonishing how the stars could hold so much beauty. And the moon; I'd never seen it so big and full. It made me wonder what was really out there. I mean aside from satellite dishes and astronauts. But in the distance into the great beyond was there really a heaven? Or was it true that after we die, there is nothing left of us.

I sat in between Edward's thighs, my back pressing against his chest. His arms were wrapped tightly around my ribs, pulling me closer to his body. Unconsciously, he let his thumb graze the sliver of skin that was exposed near the bottom of my t-shirt. He nuzzled his face into my neck, occasionally kissing the skin gently. I felt so content, and I'd never been happier with him than I was right now.

The seasons were changing from early autumn to the slight beginning of winter. The air smelled crisp and thin, full of the tang of wild crab apples and the hint of an early frost. I drew it in my lungs and held it there, the sharpness itching at my nostrils, before my breath burst out in a small white cloud.

Edward's breath tickled my ear when he spoke. "What's going on in that pretty little head of yours?" he asked in a whisper. His mouth grazed the sweep of my neck, latching his lips up and down the column of my throat.

"It's cold," I said, burrowing closer to him.

He hugged me tighter. "It's beautiful," Edward whispered. "Like you." He touched my face and kissed me deeply, my head tilted to the side. His lips were gentle and patient. There was no fierce intensity in this kiss. Just two mouths adding pressure to the other. But it was one of the best he'd ever given me. Our lips separated with a faint ripping sound.

I leaned my forehead against his, relishing the moment we shared. I wasn't sure why, but it felt like times like these were limited as if they would cease to exist if I pulled away. The thought scared me; just the idea of not being able to be with Edward ever again made my heart throb painfully in my chest.

The sky seemed rich and heavy, and the night seemed suddenly full of a thousand tiny things that I knew I'd always remember. The tickle of Edward's hair against the back of my neck, the seal-smooth callus on the inside of his middle finger, the parking lights of the Jeep casting a red shadow toward the grass.

"Did you know," Edward began, interrupting the quiet, "that a star is just an explosion that happened billions of years ago. And the light is just reaching us now?" he asked, a faint smile playing at his lips.

I shook my head, squinting toward the sky. "No, I always just thought it was something to wish on," I joked.

Edward chuckled, deep and musical. "I think you can do that, too."

"Okay," I said. "You go first."

He tightened his arms around my waist, and I felt the familiar sensation of wearing Edward's own skin, like a cloak of heat or a barrier for protection, maybe even a second self. "I wish that things could stay like this...like now...forever," he said so softly that I almost didn't hear him.

I turned in his arms, afraid to hope, even more afraid to let this opportunity slip by. My head was canted at an angle, so that I couldn't quite look Edward in the eye but could make my words fall onto his lips. "I'd like that," I whispered. "I'd like that a lot."

Edward smiled. "I was hoping you would."

And I did want things to be like this forever. I wanted Edward forever. Always. I knew that when I looked at him, I was staring at my future. From the moment I met him, I was so sure that we could never be torn apart. If one went away, then both of us had to go. The funny part was that all of my memories from the time I turned five didn't exclude Edward. He was in every single one. Even the ones with parents, Edward would still be floating in the background.

He tilted his face to the side and kissed my temple, resting his hand against mine briefly. There was another lull during which I tucked my head up under Edward's chin and nuzzled closer against him to keep the crisp air at bay.

"You still cold?" he asked, his hand resting on my bare skin where my top had ridden up and presumably feeling the goose bumps that had sprung up all over.

I nodded, trying to snuggle closer to him.

"Here, let me give this a try." Edward ran his hand down my right arm until his hand was holding my wrist.

"What are you doing?" I laughed as he rubbed his fingers over the skin on the inside of my wrist.

"You lose body heat through your hands, feet and nose mostly." He said conversationally. "However, you can best regain heat through places where the veins are close to the skin, pulse points. The best places are your wrists, your neck and your groin area."

I felt like little girl when he said groin due to the fact that I had to suppress a smile. An intense heat rushed to my face.

"Therefore…" Edward smirked at my red cheeks and then brought my wrist up to his mouth. Before I had time to ask what he was doing he breathed gently over my wrist, the warm air tickling the sensitive skin.

Immediately I felt a comfortable glow roll up my arm and spread across to settle in my chest, of course how much of this was from the warming up technique and how much came from the incredibly exciting feeling of his hot breath brushing against me I couldn't say. He glanced sideways at me and smiled at my expression which, I would imagine, could only be described at dazed. Still looking at me he bent his head to my wrist again but this time placed a soft kiss on the skin.

My body turned so that my free hand clenched the front of his t-shirt convulsively as if I was falling, and I bit my lip to keep myself from making some sort of embarrassing noise. I really didn't want him laughing at me at that moment. He lifted his head again as if to check how well he was doing. My look must have told him the answer was very well indeed because the look he sent me in return was one of mixed pleasure and smugness. Before I had time to recover he lowered his head again but this time laid his open mouth over my wrist.

I think I might actually have glowed in that moment. It couldn't just have been blood coursing through my vein. There had to be something with more intensity surging throughout my stream. I closed my eyes and swallowed thickly. I don't know what it was about the feeling of his mouth on that little patch of skin that made me react so much, maybe because the wrist is so sensitive, maybe because it reacts so strongly to heat, or maybe just because it was the single most sensual thing I had ever experienced.

Edward lifted his head once more and this time full on grinned at me. "Better?" he asked, his eyes alight with a look I had never seen before.

"Much," I said, wrapping my arms around his neck and pulling his lips down onto mine.

Edward's POV

If I wasn't excited before, I certainly was now. I covered her mouth in fierce kisses, my want for her growing with every passing second. Her hands grabbed at my shoulders, looking for some sort of support. Bella was straddling my lap, clutching fist fulls of the shirt that clung to my skin.

She locked her legs together around my back which enabled me to flip us over so that I was hovering above her. Our pelvises rammed together, and I was sure that she could feel the arousal building up beneath the seams of my jeans. I slowly ran my tongue along her bottom lip, tasting her strawberry lipgloss. Bella willingly opened her mouth to me, allowing my tongue to fill hers.

I was spinning out of control and yet perfectly centered at the same time. She reached up with one of her hands, holding the back of my head while her other hand continued to grip my back tightly. I knew that our lips were beginning to bruise from the forceful kisses. This usually wasn't like Bella, but I sure as hell wasn't complaining.

I was running out of oxygen, but I couldn't bring myself to pull away from her. I kept wondering about what would happen if she changed her mind at the exact second I went up for air. My head ducked down, running hot kisses down her jaw and neck, leading to her shoulders. Bella's intense gaze watched me with a dazed expression, clenching my shirt when I sucked lightly at the spot where her neck met her collarbone.

Normally, I was a tad bit more careful with her, but I didn't want to be. Not right now. Not anymore. Cupping my face, she brought me back up to kiss her again, arching against me as I grazed her bottom lip with my teeth. I hissed when the friction from my pants rubbed against my erection. I couldn't take it anymore. I sat up, reaching behind me, clutching my shirt in a fist, before tugging it over my head.

Bella didn't stop me. She didn't say anything. All she did was traipse her eyes down my torso. I smiled down at her slightly flushed face before I hovered over her again, capturing her lips in another soul searing kiss. She rubbed her fingers along my jaw, gliding her thumbs aimlessly over my skin. I'd never been happier than I was right now. Or aroused.

She brought her hands to my back muscles, gripping them tightly between her fingers. I slid my hands up her sides, moving under her shirt to cup her breasts. The heat from her body was searing. Bella, taking me by surprise, pressed her breasts harder into my hands. I moved my fingers to the outer sides, leaving my two thumbs to circle her areoles. The skin there puckered into a pattern of ridges at this contact, and when I let my thumbs brush over her nipples, she released a strange breathy sound of bliss into my mouth. It made the evidence of my arousal twitch, heightening my excitement.

I noticed that her hands squeezed my skin in the same pattern I brushed my fingers over her breasts. Our breathing turned into heavy pants for air as we continued. I sat up again, taking Bella with me. Fiercely, I gazed into her deep, chocolate brown orbs. She seemed slightly shy which caused me to grin. But then she raised her arms over her head, granting me permission to remove the shirt she wore. So I kept my eyes fixed on hers while I slowly removed the article of clothing, tossing it to the other side of the Jeep. Without a second thought, I reached behind her, unclasping her bra.

Her breasts came into view, and God, they were amazing. I felt myself groan at the sight of them. They were round, perky, and firm, and I couldn't imagine anyone having a better pair. "You're beautiful," I whispered when I saw the familiar blush crawl onto her skin. She smirked before pressing her naked top against me. Little zings of pleasure shot through me as her nipples rubbed my chest. She began to place little kisses along my jawline. I sucked in a shaky breath at the ministrations.

Abruptly, she caught my lips again. Hard. I pushed her back down, my body toppling over hers again. I reached down, pinching her nipples between my thumbs and forefingers, gently rolling them. Bella sighed, her mouth slightly parted when she reached down to undo my belt. Her hands were trembling as they fumbled with the button and fly of my jeans. I halted my actions on her breasts and reached down to help her. "Allow me," I said, smiling.

Finally I managed to have all the fastenings undone, and the cotton material of my briefs bulged due to my hard erection. I went back down to her and kissed the nipple on her left breast. She moaned loudly and held onto the sides of my chest. I moved my head to her right breast and repeated the action. Capturing one nipple in my mouth and moving my hand back up to the other, I busied myself with making her feel good. From the corner of my eye, I could see her biting her lips as she raked her nails down the side of my chest.

I pulled away to reach down toward the fastening on her jeans. I smiled when I saw the desire obvious in Bella's hooded lids. I undid her button and removed each tooth with deliberate slowness, trying to remember everything about this perfect moment. I tugged the denim off her legs, tossing it to the side somewhere.

My fingers hooked the bottom of her panties, but then I felt her hand on my wrist, stopping me. "Edward, wait." I glanced down into her now fearful eyes. Her forehead rested against my shoulder, breathing deeply as if she'd just seen a ghost. I waited for her to continue, but she didn't. All she did was stare into my eyes like she was searching for something that was hard to find.

I brought my lips down to hers, grazing them and nudging my nose with hers. "What's wrong?" I asked in a whisper. "Did I hurt you at all?"

She shook her head. "No. No, you didn't."

"Then what is it?" I asked again.

Bella licked her lips once. "Do you...Do you think," she whispered panicked, "it will hurt? You know like some people say it does?"

I felt my throat tighten at the thought of causing her pain. I shrugged my shoulders once and rubbed a hint of sweat from my face above my brow. "I...I don't know. I think it might a little." I didn't know what to say. It's not like I was the woman in this situation. "Do you...do you not want to do this?"

She shook her head. "No. No. I want to. I do."

I smiled once, brushing her hair off her forehead. "If I could keep it from hurting you, I would." I sighed once, staring down at Bella's nervous state. "If it hurts, I want you to pinch me so that we'll be in pain together, okay? As hard as you can. Don't hold back."

My statement caused a shaky laugh to escape her lips. It eased some of the tension we both felt now. Bella leaned up and pressed her lips softly to mine. Her hands dragged through my hair, playing with the tips of it. I reached into the wallet of my jeans that rested next to us to pull out a condom. Slowly, I slid down my briefs and put the rubber in place. I went back to pulling down Bella's blue boy-cut underwear, noticing that she was already ready.

I settled myself in between her thighs, spreading them a little. I didn't want to put too much weight on her so majority of it was on my forearms. Our chests pressed together while the only sounds that could be heard was the harsh, shallow breathing coming from both of us. "I love you," I whispered.

She nodded once. "I love you too."

And just like that, I pushed slowly inside of the tight space between her legs. I gasped as I felt her warmth around me, consuming my entire being with pleasure. It was like nothing I'd ever experienced before. So, so good. Bella hissed slightly, taking hold of my shoulders. I remained still for a moment, waiting patiently for her to adjust to my intrusion.

When she nodded her head, willing me to continue, I pushed into her again going in a bit further than the first time. Her tight walls locked around my erection sending me on a wave of pleasure that I'd never rode until now. I let out a strangled cry of sensuality while clamping my eyes shut.

I withdrew from her body and then thrusted into her another time, breaking the layer of skin that held her innocence. Her face turned to a slight grimace of hurt, and instantly, I halted my movements. What made this worse was the fact that I was enjoying myself while she was clearly experiencing pain. Her eyes were shut tightly. Only a lone tear escaped her closed lids, trickling down the side of her cheek. I raised my thumb to brush the wetness away. "Are you okay?" I asked. "Do you want me to stop?" My whispers sounded breathless.

She shook her head. "I'm okay. I'll be fine. Keep going."

Bella ran her hands through my hair, smiling sweetly at me. "You can pinch me now if you want," I suggested.

She giggled quietly before leaning up to capture my lips. I kissed her back softly, wanting to show her how much I truly loved her. How much she really meant to me. I opened my eyes to find her staring up at me in awe. I grinned down at her while running my hands through her brown locks. She took my fingers and laced them with hers, placing them high above her head.

I pulled out of her skin and thrusted into her again. She was so warm and so wet. I let out a low whimper of ecstasy before checking to make sure Bella was still willing to keep going. She pulled my lips down to hers when I pushed my pulsing cock inside of her again, muffling the groan that escaped her.

Eventually, I developed a slow rhythm that worked for both of us. She didn't look as if she were in pain anymore which was definitely a good thing. I didn't like seeing the anguished face she possessed when I first entered her. Her lips were slightly parted now while her lids were half-way closed, just enough for me to see the pleasure in her eyes. Bella was enjoying this now.

When I saw that, I picked up my pace a few notches, pushing into her warmth at a faster rate, but not too quick. This sent her moans louder, more pronounced, and I loved every minute of it. The way my name fell off her lips was enough to drive me crazy. Her hips began to raise to meet mine, causing my cock to plunge deeper into her. I cried out, uttering her name while I gripped her body closer to my figure. She felt so good.

Her quiet moans eventually turned into loud cries that fueled me to go faster and a little harder. Shudders of elation coursed through my veins whenever I heard her voiced groans of pleasure. I gripped her hips, bringing our lovemaking to a whole new level. Ecstasy shot through my entire body when I felt her lean legs wrap tighter around my waist. That simple movement allowed me to swim deeper inside of her.

I loved it.

She loved it.

And then suddenly she was trembling at her core. I went faster and deeper and harder. Her mouth was open wide, in the form of an 'O' shape, her neck arched back and eyes clamped shut. Bella's small hands gripped my shoulders. "Edward...I...Oh God...I think..."

Bella didn't need to say anymore because I understood. The end was almost near for me, too. My body began to shudder while the cramping knot in my stomach became more intense. I was so close. Her fingernails dug into my pale flesh, holding on for dear life. Her orgasm was loud and held clarity. She screamed my name repeatedly, inching me closer to my own climax.

I clutched her hips roughly with both my hands, pulling her toward me, deepening my strokes, trying to satisfy the ache for my own release. She held me tighter, dragging her nails against my skin, letting me know that she loved it. I yelled her name the next moment when my climax hit, sending me over the edge on a boat of elation.

It was like nothing I'd ever experienced before. And it was...amazing. I collapsed on top of the woman I loved, both of us panting heavily. My head rested on her chest, her hands tangling in my hair. Bella's heart hammered rapidly against my ear. She sighed in a rough voice, continuously rubbing her hands through my tousled locks.

"I love you," I said breathlessly against her skin.

The vibrations from her voice tickled my cheeks. "I love you, too."

I glanced up at her, grinning lazily. She cupped my cheek with her palm, pulling me up toward her lips. I kissed her softly, letting her know how much I loved her and that I would love her until my last breath. I drew back from her lips, staring deeply into her abysmal orbs. She'd never looked more beautiful or more...real. She was perfect. We were perfect. This moment was perfect. Everything about this was perfect.

"Way to go, Edward! You're finally a man!"

Emmett's booming voice congratulated me right as I walked through the front door of my house. I didn't say a word about having sex with Bella, or even that I was with her the whole time. In fact, all I was able to do was get my shoes off my feet. Was I really that obvious that he could tell just by looking at me? Or was it just a brother type of thing?

I didn't answer him, only smirked slightly in spite of myself. Emmett grabbed me and draped his arm over my shoulder. "Damn, I'm good. I knew you guys did it." Emmett chuckled at his own abilities.

Discreetly, I checked around for my mother, making sure that she wasn't in sight. Having her hear something like this would mean a longer conversation than was necessary. "How could you tell?" I asked, my voice a slight whisper as we strolled up the staircase toward my bedroom.

Emmett laughed. "Dude, you have the whole I-finally-got-laid look all over your face. And your fly is open."

I glanced down at the zipper that was undone and quickly yanked it up.

"So are you going to tell me how it was? I mean I know you've been dying to get on Jelly Belly since you started growing pubic hair. And you guys survived all this time with just making out. So it had to have been fucking mind blowing!" Emmett said as we entered my room. "Am I right?"

I laughed at my brother's enthusiam.

Bella's POV

It hurt for a moment. Sex, that is. Then it wasn't so bad. It felt odd, stretched from the inside out, but not really painful. The people that said it was the worst agony they've ever felt were definietely exaggerating. As time went on, it started to feel good. Really, really good. And then it turned to amazing, and what made it even better was the fact that I matched with Edward on both physical and emotional levels.

He was so encouraging and comforting. And I knew for a fact that if I'd asked him to stop, he would have without a word. But I didn't want him to. Being one with Edward only made my bond and loyalty to him feel even stronger than what it already was.

I sat in my bedroom, reminiscing on the nights events, when I noticed my window being shoved open from the outside. A moment later, Edward came tumbling inside, making a quiet thump. He saw me and smiled wider than I'd ever seen him. "Hey," he whispered, coming to sit by my side.

"Hi," I greeted. "I was just thinking of you."

Edward pushed my blanket and got underneath the covers with me. "Yeah?"

I nodded. "Mmhm."

I felt closer to Edward now. Like I somehow could understand him better than what I usually did. I knew every inch of his body and every inch of his mind. There wouldn't be anymore surprises between us because we knew each other. And it almost seemed silly to think that I was afraid of having sex with him. We'd fit together perfectly like we were made for each other. Destiny is what I would call it. Yes, Edward was my destiny.

But why couldn't I shake the feeling that something was off. That something wasn't right. Everything looked as if it were in perfect order so what was wrong? Why did something seem like it didn't belong, like it wasn't needed or wanted. I wasn't sure why I felt that way, but I just couldn't dismiss it.

Edward rumpled my hair with his big palms. His eyes were filled with the same lust and desire as a few hours ago. "You know you're beautiful, right?"

I smiled, snuggling closer to his welcoming body. His words reminded me of the first time he ever kissed me. We were ten years old. I remembered that it was warm that day which was highly unusual especially in a place like Forks, Washington. We were playing hide-and-go-seek, and over a period of ten minutes, Edward was no where to be found. I'd searched everywhere for him, but it was as if he'd vanished in thin air.

The thought frightened me, chilling me to the bone. Losing Edward was what I considered one of the most horrible things to ever happen to me, even when I was a little girl. He was my best friend, the boy that I'd already fallen in love with. I remembered my eyes filling with tears of horror when I called his name and there was no answer. So I'd tried again and again.

"Edward?" I yelled in the forest behind our houses. "Edward? Come on this isn't funny anymore. Where are you?"

Still no answer. I started to panic, and my hands shook violently. My knees were trembling to the point where I could barely move. If I took a step forward, I'd surely fall flat on my face. "Edward!" I called again. This time my voice shook and hot tears began to trickle down my face. "I don't want to play anymore!" I screamed. "Please, just come out! Please, Edward!" I tried again.

Nothing. Again. And again. But then I saw his bronze hair from behind a rock and a wave of relief washed through me. But it was a fleeting refreshment. Especially when I noticed he was passed out on the ground, his body not moving, his eyes closed shut. I rushed to his side, holding his small head in my hands. "Edward? Edward! Wake up! Come on, Edward!" By now, a waterfall of salty streaks were flowing from my lids. I'd never been more afraid in my life.

He was limp in my hands, and I'd tried shaking him. But he wouldn't budge.

Nothing.

But suddenly, his eyelids began to flutter, his expression turning dazed and confused. "Edward," I said, sighing in relief when he woke up.

He smiled up at me, a weak grin. "You know you're beautiful, right?"

The words shocked me. They were the last thing I'd expected Edward to say especially at the young age of ten. But I beamed down at him while his head rested in my lap. My fingers unconsciously ran through his mess of copper locks. His face was stone white, paler than his usual color. And there was a faint trace of sweat etched across his forehead. It confused me, but then I looked at his lips.

Warm and supple and inviting. I did the only thing I could think to do. Slowly, I tilted my head down to his and captured them with my own. It was quick but electrifying. My lips zinged with the tingling sensation from his responding mouth. But when I pulled away, Edward dozed back off into unconsciousness. I didn't think twice when I got up and sprinted home to get Esme and Carlisle.

The memory was bittersweet. I still was never told what went wrong, but I assumed he hit his head on one of the boulders.

I was back in present time when Edward kissed the side of my forehead. I glanced up at his eyes, feeling tears well in mine. "Don't ever leave me," I whispered to him.

He looked confused, but he smiled anyway. "I'm not going anywhere."

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