It was almost evening when Carlisle Mercedes was thrown from the road. The drives side was smashed to pieces, and the car was a wreak already but there needed to be a crash site. The car was set a blaze, which attracted attention. Esme had come into her own, as she was stronger than anyone. Almost as if she was being kept going by someone. It wasn't long before rescues crews were on the scene. Esme waited for that call to say that her husbands body was lost in the fire. The family trudged down to the hospital where, the staff were out in force passing their condolences about their loss. Edward stood frozen as the people who Carlisle had worked with, were in floods of tears. Out of everyone Edward and Esme had to be strong, not only for themselves, but for the others.
At the hospital, a few boxes lay on top of a desk, that used to be Carlisle's. It was filled with papers, and on top several letters addressed to every member of the family, and Sam and Jacob. Edward looked puzzled by this, as did Esme and the rest of the family. "Why are my fathers things packed up?" Edward asked, as he shot a glare around the staff. "Edward" Bella said, as she touched his arm. Edward shook his head, "Answer me WHY?" He bellowed, as a red faced nurse stepped from the group. "Dr Cullen, said he was taking a job in New York. He... he packed his stuff yesterday, and said he would stop by to collect his things later." She said, as she folded back to the group which had assembled. Bella managed a smile, "Thank you" She said, as she looked at the boxes. "He knew" Were the only words she spoke, as Emmett, and Jasper both took a box, and walked out.
The saddened group left the hospital, not bothered by the smell of blood that had surrounded them. Jacob and Sam met them, as they arrived back to the house. The family slowly flooded the living room, and too up seats as both boxes were places in front of Esme. Esme sat facing the room, next to a fire that she guessed Sam or Jacob had lit for them. All eyes were upon Esme, as she disregarded the letters for a moment. One box was filled with medical journals. Something which Esme, placed quickly in his office as she the sound of the door, clicking shut nearly sent her into uncontrollable sobs again. She placed herself back down in the chair, as she looked at the faces of a weary family and two wolves that seemed to have seen better days. Her hand nervously found the second box, as she pulled out a photo. A family photo that they had taken while in the meadow together. The light that shone from all those happy faces, was beautiful. She placed it above the fire, that crackled and shot a few sparks up the chimney.
Esme picked several white envelopes up, and held them tightly as she looked at the names. She passed them out accordingly, as she watched the other open them. Sam was first to clear his throat, as tears again streamed from his eyes, as he began to read allowed.
Dear Sam,
If you are reading this then, it has come to a point in my life, when I can no longer be on earth with you. As you well know, today you fought along side my family, for something that meant more to me than you can ever knew. Your alliance and unwavering help, is so very much appreciated, and i only hope that you can forgive me for what has happened. I hope that the pack are all well, and that no harm has come to anyone.
I know that my words do not mean much now, but thank you. Thank you for everything that you have done for us, and I only hope that I can repay you in some small way. Although I do not think that it is possible anymore. Please take the tickets, and have a weekend away with Emily. Everything is paid for, and don't worry about over spending, it is all taken care of. It is the least that I can do to thank you.
To one of the most generous and understanding wolves I have been privileged to meet, Thank you,
Carlisle Cullen.
Sam, finished talking, as the faces looked at him with a mixture of emotions. He looked at the tickets that were grasped in his hand, pre paid for a whole weekend away. Sam looked at Esme, as he held them out, "I cant, Esme." He said to her. Esme shook her head, "He wanted you to go Sam, he wouldn't have done it otherwise. Go ahead" She said, as she smiled softly. He quickly wiped the tears from his eyes, as he nodded and looked to see who would read next. There was a silence that fell upon the room, as heavy eyes went to the pieces of paper in front of them. "I'll go" Jacob said, as Renesmee curled up next to him, as his fingers opened the white envelope and looked at what was inside.
Dear Jacob,
Well I have to say, our encounters have been filled with some kind of fun and excitement. The saying never a dull moment, comes to mind when you are around. Jacob, I am obviously no longer there, and so I take this opportunity to welcome you. I know that the marching band and fireworks might not be out, but for what it is worth, I am glad that you have made Renesmee happy. The one thing I ask of you is that you never hurt her, and take care of her to the best of your ability.
I know that in the past, we have been on the opposing sides, and that confrontations have occurred, due to a difference of opinion. However I am grateful for your help over the years, and I only wish that I could have said this before, things got out of hand. Jacob please take care of Renesmee, and look out for everyone. Family is the most important thing, and it a gift in itself. The card that you find with this, is to an account I set up a few years ago, in light of the imprinting. You shall find enough money there for you to look after your family. That should last you a life time.
Wishing you many happy years,
Doc Fang. Carlisle Cullen.
Jacob laughed, as he swung his arm around Renesmee, and placed his letter and card, on the arm of the sofa. "Who told him about Doc Fang?" He asked as a genuine smile crossed his face. Sam placed a waning hand on his shoulder, as he looked at the sad faces. Bella was the first to speak, "Its ok Sam. I told him, he thought it was funny. I think that we all used it once or twice with him" She said, as she smiled a little as well. It was at that moment, that Edward walked out. He left Bella sitting by himself as he tore off upstairs into his father office, slamming the door behind him. "Leave him, he will come back in his own time" Esme said, as her gaze went to the remaining family members. It was Emmett, that spoke next, "Looks like its my turn." they could see him physically shaking as he opened the envelope and held the letter with trembling hands.
Dear Emmett,
Emmett, you are one of the best jokers around. There is never a sad moment, when you start to laugh and joke. I call upon your services, to at least make a few inappropriate jokes at this time, of which I know you are completely capable of. Rose ask of me all those years ago to change you. The story you already know, and I must say that ever since I did, I have never regretted it. I am sorry however for the pain I caused you, you have heard me say that a thousand times over, but I truly am.
You and Rose are something special. You two share something that no one else in the family does, although I the fact you tried to share the noise with the rest of us... enough said about that.
Emmett was interrupted by a laugh that came from upstairs. Emmett grinned, as Edward appeared again, walking back over to Bella. "I dont think that he liked the noise" Emmett said as he laughed with Edward. The room seemed to lighten a little, as people began to not relax but feel a peace. Heads turned to Jasper, who seemed calmer himself as Jasper shook his head. "Always a way with your words Carlisle." Emmett said, as his eyes wondered back to the piece of paper.
Emmett, look after Rose. She is an angel that I was blessed to find, and look after. You two were truly made for each other, and don't let anyone take that away. You are only as strong as you feel, keep your self safe, and knew that I loved you like a son of my own. I have been truly blessed to have had your company. You have a trip waiting for you whenever you want to take it, your own pirate paradise in the sun for a week.
Best wishes for eternity, and in the true spirit of things... rock on.
Carlisle Cullen.
Emmett smile as he finished reading, "It was me Carlisle who was blessed." Emmett began to shake again, as the moment of calmness passed. All he felt was emptiness, as he stared at Rose who was sat in all her beauty, beside him. The voice that no one guessed would speak, did exactly so. "Mum, dad can I?" Renesmee asked, as she held her letter that was already open. "Sure" Was the unanimous reply from both Bella and Edward.
My dear Renesmee,
IT is unfortunate what life throws at you. It seems that life threw me one hell of a curve ball. Life does not always go as you would like it to. Today being a perfect example of that. I am asking that you listen to Bella and Edward. No matter what you think, or what problems that arise. They know what is best for you, along with Jacob. Do not loose hope in your own beliefs, but always listen to your parents. The same way your dad, and mum listened to me. Jacob is special. And I know he would protect you, from others as with Edward and Bella.
Do not put your self in harms way. There are worse things than vampires out there, and Renesmee you are not indestructible. You know I love you and no matter where I end up, I will never stop that. Just hold on to family, and don't run away from what you're afraid of. I know it might be hard by you have a wonderful life ahead of you. Be strong for yourself, and I am the luckiest grandpa to ever live. My promise to you still stands, enclosed are plane tickets, and hotel reservations. Unfortunately I cannot join you, as I had hoped, but go and enjoy yourself. With the rest of the family..
Goodbye,
Grandpa Carlisle.
Renesmee burst into tears, as she buried her face into Jacobs chest. "I want him back, he promised to take me on holiday, he said we were going this summer. He cant be gone, I love him, tell me he will come back... he wouldn't leave." She sobbed, as Bella shook her head. "Renesmee, he... isn't coming back. But he loves you, he had shown you that, over and over." Bella told her, fighting to stop herself from running out. Rose looked at Renesmee's tear stained face, as she held up her own letter. "I..." She said, as she took a deep breath. "I'll go" She said, as her pale white fingers carefully opened the letter.
My Angel,
I am sorry Rose. I know this life, was not one you chose, and you have shown your unhappiness with it. My reasoning for my actions are as follows. Seeing something so beautiful lying there, after what those monsters did to you. It hurt to see you fading, because of some drunken men that had no chance at all with you. Over the years, I have come to understand over time, just how you feel about this life. And for the pain and my actions, I am truly sorry. I can only hope for your forgiveness and understanding on the matter. Enough of what was, and has happened.
Rose you shall always be my angel, no matter what. You and Emmett, are truly in love, and I am happy that you found your soul mate as I have. I know you are capable of a lot of things Rose, and I just ask that you not be sad. And keep Emmett in line, with his humour. Thank you for being a wonderful daughter, and I will always watch over you. From where ever I may end up. I promised you this, a long time ago Rose. Take good care of it.
love forever and always,
Carlisle Cullen.
Emmett smiled, "What is it with my jokes?" He said lightly, "Doc Fang needs to lighten up a little" He said, as the faces smiled briefly. "So Rose, what are you looking after?" He asked her, as he followed the line of her sight, to her hand. Her fingers uncurled to reveal a plain gold locket, that had dulled with age. As quickly as people looked, Rose fastened it around her neck. "His mothers locket. Carlisle said that I could have it a few days ago, but I refused it." She explained, as her fingers played with the delicate chain. "He told me that he wanted me to have it. As it was no good sitting in his desk." She said, as she opened the oval shaped locket, to reveal two halves of a picture of the family. "Thank you Carlisle" She said to the room, as she wrapped her arms around Emmett. It was Jasper who looked up next, and nodded as he began to read his own letter.
Jasper, the true warrior.
Before I say what I need to, Jasper do not use your gift. I am asking you this, because I know with all the will in the world that you can not handle this. There are no words to explain how happy I am that you chose to join this family. You have been a pleasure to have around, and you always make me happy. All be that your gift or not. Your knowledge and personality have all been an inspiration to me. The choice I made today, it had nothing to do with battle plans, or tactics. They were all as flawless as the could have been.
And your demonstrations, were always filled with excitement. I thank you for your time and understanding of the vegetarian diet. I know how difficult it has been for you, and like a true solder you handle what ever was thrown your way like a true warrior. I can only hope that my passing does not effect you badly, as I would hate to the cause of any pain or upset. Again Jasper, I ask that you do not use your gift at this time. You have been the most wonderful inspiration to me, and thank you, Jasper Hale. As my gift to you Jasper, should be ready in about a week. It is by no means an original idea, and if you do not like it then, please do not feel obligated in any way to keep it. It is in the sun, and is all yours, a place where no one else can be, and certainly a place where you can relax.
Take care always,
Carlisle Cullen.
Jasper sighed, as he smiled and looked up. There was a picture of an island, one that had isle Hale, written across it. And the keys to what he guessed was a small house in the picture. "He should have never had to do this." He said, as he shook his head. "Aro changed his plans, I can see that now. He was not after all of us... just the one. The one who he knew would do exactly this" Jasper said, as he looked at Esme, who sat staring out of the window, into the cool darkness that had surrounded the house. Jaspers gaze fell to Alice, she hardly seemed to be in the same room as them. "Alice whats wrong?" He asked her, as his arm fell casually across her shoulders. Alice turned to face them, as if she had suddenly been surprised. "His future I still see it. I can see him with us. Here in this room, he is laughing." She said as she began to look in fear around everyone. "I am mad, aren't I." She told them as Jasper held her close. "Shhhs, you just hurt, its ok" He said, doing his best to obey what Carlisle had asked of him. Bella could see how much Alice's visions were affecting her, as Bella spoke. "I would like to read mine now" She said, as she opened the letter.
Dearest Bella,
Ever since our last stay in Forks, you have been with out family. I can truly say, that upon meeting you, I have thought of you as a daughter, much the same as Alice and Rose. You are the one true love of Edward, another special person whom I have been blessed to meet. To see Edward so happy, and you the cause of this, have given me great joy to see. You have touched my heart, in ways that you can only imagine. The decision I made, I do not regret. The simple fact is that since you came into all our lives, a lot has changed. You had an effect on everyone in the family, and I sincerely thank you for it.
I am glad that when you open this letter, you are a vampire. As I would hate to miss out on stitching you up again. All those accidents, cuts, bruises and falls. Have all been worth the pleasure of your company. You have given me a chance to see Edward at his happiest, you also saved his life and of course the lovely Renesmee. I truly cannot thank you for those things enough. Bella it has been a true pleasure, and try not to let Emmett get to you too much. I really wish that I could spend more time with you and the family, but something tells me that it was my time to go. Bella, I have seen your aversion to gifts, and well since I am no longer there, i only thought it fair that I get you something as well. In Edwards room, between the CD cases you shall fine a jewellery box, please do not return it, and I know you will find some use for it.
Forever and always on your debt,
Carlisle Cullen.
Bella looked at the letter, as she glanced over at Edward who had the same look as Esme. One that was trying not to let the emotion show, as they sat and listened to words that, in not so many words, Carlisle had spoken to them all, over the last few weeks. It was Emmett, who left and returned in a matter of moments with the black box, that was mentioned. He passed it to Bella, as she shook her head. "I don't want to see it. I cant!" She said as she pushed the box away, towards Edward. "Please Bella, it was what he wanted for you." Edward said, as he handed her the box again.
With a deep sense of dread she opened the black velvet box, to reveal a necklace. A blue diamond encrusted neckalce. She took a quick breath, as she ran a finger over the few hundred stones that were encrusted into the setting. Edward smile, as he fastened the necklace around Bella neck, before she could speak. "Carlisle has good taste Bella, it looks great" Emmett chipped in, as Bella sat uncomfortably. "I... dont know what to say." She chirped, as Esme smiled at her. "He wanted you to have that Bella, its nothing to be ashamed of." She said, as Bella seemed to relax. "I guess I should go" Alice said, in more of a confused tone. "I still see him, you know" She announced.
Dear Alice the fashion guru,
I thank you for keeping one of the worst secrets that I could ever ask of you. I should have never asked it, but I had no choice in this matter. Please rest easy with the knowledge it was what I wanted, and that the decision was not made with out thought. When you joined our family, Alice you were always so full of energy, and hope. Something which I shall never forget, you made this house one of the few places that everyone could truly be themselves, and of course you were. I admire your restraint, and you sharing of you visions with us. They have proved to be invaluable, in aiding our existence. I must ask one more task of you, please forgive me..
Those few words, were enough to sent Alice into hysterics. "Forgive him, he wants me to forgive him." She shrieked, "How can I, he made me promise, I lied to you all, and yet he asked for my forgiveness." Alice flapped her arms around as she jumped up. "I cannot forgive myself, let alone..." She had said enough as she collapsed on to the floor again. Jasper surrounded her, as Sam and Jacob watched unable to say or do anything. Esme gazed at her daughter, and without any thought she hugged Alice as tightly as she could. "Forgive yourself Alice, please." She begged, "He made his choices, be them good or bad, Carlisle should have never asked that of you. And I am telling you that, nothing. And I mean nothing is your fault for this." She told her. With a small shiver Alice bowed her head, "Esme, i'm so very sorry." She said through sobs, as she picked the letter up again.
I have not made this easy for you Alice, and I regret that. Unfortunately now, I have no way of making things up to you. To say that I am not angry with myself, is not close enough to how I feel, having to write this to you. If I could have seen another way around this, I would have taken i, provided that the family was ok. Alice you mean more than I can say, and I will watch over you from where ever I end up. Please know this, I love you so much that to have to say goodbye, and to see you struggle to keep that secret, was more than I deserved from you. I understand if you cannot forgive me, but you are a beloved daughter and my feelings shall never change.
forever and always your loving, caring,
Carlisle Cullen.
Alice dropped the letter, as she threw herself into Jasper. "I forgive him, I really do, and he wont know that. He was fine in my vision, no one was hurt, Aro changed his mind" She sobbed, as Renesmee turned in disgust to her. "You knew all this time, you knew he was going to do this. And you told no one, not even grandma. Carlisle should never be asking for your forgiveness, You should be begging for ours" She screamed, "You were the one who killed him. You did this" She added, before she ran upstairs. Edward did not even blink at his daughters out burst. Jacob took off, after Renesmee, as Sam sank back into the seat not sure of his place. Alice began to babble, through sobs, as Jasper did his best to comfort her.
"Alice, she doesn't mean it. Aro changed his mind, and Carlisle did what he had to... he did what he had so we all could live. That is all" Bella said, as looked at Edward, and moved upstairs. There was a chorus of shouting, before things suddenly fell quiet. Bella appeared with a red faced, Renesmee, and Jacob, who seemed to be confused. They all returned to their places, as Jacob cleared his throat. "Let me get this straight, Carlisle asked you to keep his secret of knowing this was going to happen" He began, as he looked at Alice, "And then you said Aro changed his mind... that is when you saw what Carlisle knew." Jacob asked, as Alice nodded. "He was so sure that things would change, I saw that everyone was ok. He asked me not to say anything, and keep up my version." She explained, "Then in the meadow, I saw Carlisle being attacked by Aro, Marcus and Caius. I never saw him die." She said.
Edward looked up, with rage in his eyes. Alice cowered as he looked at her, "Its not you Alice, its Carlisle. He could have spoken to us. Spoken to me or Esme. No he had to do this his way, and look what he has done." He sad as he waved his arm around the room. "Everyone is a mess, all because he made a stupid choice. He was supposed to love us, love Esme, and its obvious that he doesn't. All the gifts, his words, they mean nothing to me anymore." Edward yelled, as his hand found a small glass figurine. He threw it against the wall, and watched as it smashed into a thousand tiny shards.
Esme whimpered, as she stood up and glared at Edward. "He loves all of us. If he didn't, why did he even bother, writing. Or sending the gifts. We might not understand why, but there was a reason and he didn't decide this at the role of a dice. So don't you go saying those hurtful things." She screeched at him. Edward was taken a back for a moment, as Esme had never done that before. "Fine if you think that, then you read his stupid letter. Read the Im sorrys that mean nothing, as he isn't here to say them himself." Edward yelled thrusting the paper into his mothers hands. Esme, opened his letter, and stood in front of him as she read.
My dear Edward,
If you have received this letter, that means I am already gone. There are so many things, that I wanted to say, but finding the right words to explain my actions, are difficult. This letter is by no means, an apology for what I have done. I stand by my decision, as I would stand by your own, with out question. Over the past few weeks, you have most likely noticed a rise in gifts, and words. I had no choice but to hide my choices, from you. I know you would with out a doubt, talk me out of it. And I know in my heart of hearts, that you would completely succeed.
Edward you have been my companion for longer than I can say, and never once have I regretted you being with me. You are the one person, who made me believe that I was doing good, loved you like a son. And never passed judgement or angry words for your choices. I only ask that you can grant me this. Reading what I have written, is no easy task and for me writing this when in only a few hours, Carlisle Cullen shall be chatting with you all, has been the most difficult thing I have ever done. Edward I trust you, and I am entrusting you with the belief that you will take care of everyone.
Edward, happiness is too little of a word, to express how I feel about you and your new family. It has been a privilege and an honour to have been your friend, companion, and step father for all these years. Please know this, my love has been unconditional, and always will be. No matter what your personal views are on the after life, I believe I am in a better place. Thank you for taking the time to read this. And many you see many happy years to come. Those days when your mother was ill, she gave me some of her personal effects. She asked me to give them to you when you were old enough, however, the years have passed I the right time to present those to you, it never arrived. Upon my passing, I can only say that there is no more time. The safe in my office is where you shall find them.
Goodbye Edward,
Carlisle Cullen.
Edward froze at the words, Esme had relayed to him. There was no apology, typical Carlisle and the fact he had written all that he had, meant more to Edward than he showed. "I'm sorry Esme, it hard to think that he is gone. I... he took care of me, he helped me through life. Now he... he's not here" He said, as he looked out of the window. Esme nodded, as she handed Edward the page with his scripture on it. "Carlisle did what he had to, he protected us with the cost of his life. It may not have been a well thought out plan, but were are all here because of that choice." Esme said, her eyes filled with regret. Her eyes rested upon the two small white notes that she grasped in her hands. The one addressed to her, with the handwriting of her husband, she passed to Sam. "I cant read that, myself." She told him, she hurt too much to even read what he had written. Sam opened the note as a white rose petal fell from his grasp. Esme picked it up, as she held it carefully as she listened to Sam speak.
Ever since you walked into my life, I have been smiling. There hasn't been a day when I have gone out with a frown on my face, and it's all because of you. Esme, I am glad that you came into my life. You are the love of my life, and everything that I could ever have asked you to be. Understanding, loving, caring, faithful and most of all someone who would accept me for who I am. Now I have found the person I was looking for. My heart told me that my Princes was there when I first saw you that day in the hospital. I didn't have to think twice when I bit you and when you agreed to be my wife. I knew that you were Mrs. Perfect. I don't think that there is, or there could be, anyone better than you out there for me.I love you with my whole heart. I have never trusted anyone the way I trust you. Sometimes I even doubt myself, but I know I will never doubt you because you are my true love. I know deep down inside that you will never break my heart or never let me down in anyway. Thank you Esme for giving me the happiest times I could ask for. I pray everyday that you are blessed with everything you deserve. I will love you until the end of time.
I ask that you do not dwell on the fact I am no longer there, as I wish you to move on as soon as you feeling comfortable with it. I want you to be happy and Forever Yours, love
Carlisle Cullen
As Sam finished, tears again began to roll down his face. Sam watched as Esme walked over to the window, Edward was staring out of as she fought to keep her voice on a level tone. "There is no moving on for me." She announced, "Carlisle was my soul mate. No moving on" She said, as stood and leaned against the window. Her reflection looking back at her, as the darkness seemed as if it would never lift. The last note was addressed family. Esme opened it as best she could before she began to read.
Well this has certainly been an eventful few weeks. Reading this you may or may not have received your individual letters. I shall make the assumption that you, have not as I write this. You each all know what you mean to me, or meant as things have turned out. No matter where I am, you are all in my heart, and I shall never forget just what you have done for me, and given to me. There are so many things, that Carlisle Cullen fell short of saying to you all. And these notes do not even begin to cover them. However there, are few ways to really say what you mean. So everyone here this,.... as long as you stick together, and do not part ways. My passing will have been worth ever moment. Please understand my reasoning behind not telling you all, and look after each other.
I will always love you all,
Carlisle.
Esme took a deep breath as she finished reading. The darkness seemed fitting, as she walked back to the chair by the dying fire. Esme surveyed the scene, Jacob and Renesmee, were asleep on the opposite end of the sofa, to Edward and Bella. Who were consoling each other, with whispers much like Emmett and Rose. Alice seemed to have gained some control back, and Jasper sat motionless with Alice in her arms. Sam stood had taken a seat on the floor by Esme, as a wave of silence covered the room.