OMG a chase sequence!

(A not a hint of Bruce Willis in sight. Good. I never liked his films. Random crap is much better! Actually I've never seen his films but that's beside the point!)

Last time on "We've got our own problems," wait, I'm not writing the entire f-(turns radio up really loud) chapter all over again! If you want to know want happened last time just read the last chapter you lazy bastard! And there's a really non-important spoiler coming up in a minute, so read the last chapter! I'll make sure you don't see the spoiler by making sure it's out of your vision. So I'm going to have to take up some space. So I have decided that I am going to continually write the letter "e" ok?

Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee! It's not working! Err… Oh screw it I'll just carry on and forget the people who had the stupid idea of reading the chapters last to first. If anybody is that stupid. Anyway the person standing in the doorway was Spanish Ninja. No surprises there. With a chainsaw this time.

Spanish Ninja: I'm here for the tiger who keeps hitting me in the balls, the human who helps the tiger, and the one that says "chedda cheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeese" and is really annoying.

Octorok: Chedda cheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeese!

Spanish Ninja: Yes, that one.

Kiki: They're not here!

Spanish Ninja: Well I came to mangle someone, so I'm going to have to mangle you all!

Stitches: Here comes a chase scene!

Hopper: Do you have to chase me?

Spanish Ninja: Yes!

Hopper: But I'm asthmatic!

Spanish Ninja: Oh fine, I suppose it would be unfair otherwise. But you others better start running!

Stitches: Can we play hide and seek?

Spanish Ninja: NO!!!

Stitches: Awwwww…

Then Spanish Ninja began to swirl the chainsaw wildly round his head, revved it up and…

Opal: WTF we're not chasing in my house! Outside!

So everyone (except Hopper) slowly trudged outside and got in their positions for chase scene. The Archbishop of Canterbury, who kept mooning at everyone, made this difficult.

Stitches: OMG there's a tattoo on his ass! It says, "Jesus is coming, look busy."

Kiki: Shut up and get ready to run!

Stitches: But that's like in Johnny Engl-

Kiki: SHUT UP!!!

Spanish Ninja: Ok, now we can finally start chasing!

Stitches: Wait! I need to blow my nose!

Spanish Ninja: Oh for God's sake…

Stitches: Done!

Spanish Ninja: Ok, now RUN!!!

So Spanish Ninja chased Opal, Kiki and Stitches over a hill, across the bridge over the river, through brambles….

Stitches: Ow!

Past a giant flesh-eating moth, past the kids and Aurora, who were having a picnic, and eventually past the river. Here there was a fallen tree that made a bridge to a tiny island in the middle of the river. Opal ran across this bridge then smashed it so that Spanish Ninja couldn't reach the island. But neither could Kiki or Stitches.

Kiki: You backstabbing bastard!

Opal: Sorry, it's every animal for herself (or himself)!

So Kiki and Stitches continued to run. Until they ran straight into Bill, Pippy, Bob and George, who were outside Butch's house.

George: Holy shit, a crazy ninja guy with a chainsaw!

Spanish Ninja: Shut up or I'll kidnap that rabbit!

George: Pippy? I wonder if I care!

Spanish Ninja: Fine!

Kiki: Aw, shit.

Then Spanish Ninja picked up Pippy and proceeded to run off.

Pippy: George, save me!

George: No.

Bill: Someone had to do this and this, and since Rowan's not here, it must be me.

Kiki: Do what?

Stitches: Sleep?

Bob: Eat jam?

Punchy: Eat waffles?

Kiki: Punchy, you're supposed to be in Azalea!

Punchy: Oh yeah!

So Punchy magically flew back to Azalea.

Bill: No! Do this!

Bill punched Spanish Ninja in the balls.

Spanish Ninja: Arrgh, the pain!

And he ran off.

Pippy: Bill, you, you….

Bill: I know, I saved you.

Pippy: No, you ruined everything! (slaps Bill) George was about to save me!

Bill: Ow….

Bob: I told you so.

Bill: Told me what?

Bob: That you should have just sat down and eaten some jam.

Kiki: Well, at least we're all-

Butch: Oi! Who's making all that noise!

Butch was looking out the window with a grumpy expression, when suddenly a weird blue gyroid with an orange antenna sticking out of the top of it's head came into view.

Gyroid: Commander of gyroids B-Dog, your master is pleased with how well the plan with the blue duck is going.

Butch: Awww, crap. Thanks for giving me away!

Kiki: So it was you!

Butch: Well, yes, but it was more my master.

Kiki: We're going to come up there, batter the crap out of you, and get the cure!

Butch: Oh, you are, are you? Well let me tell you this house is covering up my real home! Now, if you're going to come up here, let me make it hard!

Suddenly a castle rose up from the ground under Butch's house, and continued to rise until it was tall. Very tall. Then the old house fell off, and left…

Butch: FORT CANINE!!!

Yes, that.

Butch: Try and get me now!

Kiki: Err, let's come back here tomorrow, Stitches. I'm too tired to scale that castle today.

George: Could we help you tomorrow?

Kiki: I don't see why not. Be back here tomorrow morning, ok?

George: Ok!

That night…

Opal: Oh yes, that ninja will never get me here, he he… Err, could somebody get me off this island now? Please? Please? Oh, dammit.

Sorry that it has been so long since the last chapter. I hope you enjoyed this one!