Chapter Eighteen;
Ex-planations

Kasey was on her back, a novel held up above her, when RO opened her cabin door and looked in. He smiled. Previously Kase's random camping spaces all over their house had annoyed him, but now they made him remember the many times he'd nearly tripped over his wife in one of her reading positions. Back when things between them had been easier. Unlike now when Kasey turned and frowned at him for disturbing her.

"What's wrong?" She sat up, shutting her book quickly.

"You heard about ET?" He asked, stepping inside and shutting the door behind him. She nodded, pushing herself to her feet and dumping the book on the top bunk.

"Is he alright?"

RO leant against the door, watching her pull up the sheets on her bunk, remaking it. He hadn't missed the fact that all of a sudden Kasey was nervous around him, doing things with her hands and avoiding eye contact when they spoke. The Kasey he knew would march right up to someone, tell them what she thought then prod them in the chest if they disagreed, but now she seemed unsure of herself. "Are you alright?" He finally asked.

Kasey turned with a frown. "Of course I am, why wouldn't I be?"

RO didn't believe her. "Because you've been acting strange lately. You're nervous around me, like I'm a stranger."

Kasey sat down on the desk next to her, sitting atop of a small pile of papers it seemed she'd left there. She hadn't even noticed them when she sat down. "Have you heard back from Holly?" She changed the subject, not meeting his eye as she asked, instead looking at her fingernails.

"Yeah, she says she'll put us up for the night, as long as you don't mind sharing with me."

Kasey shrugged. "Why would I?" She gave a tight-lipped smile. "Unless you've started talking in your sleep again."

He shook his head. "You're getting me mixed up with you." At the end of RO's sentence an uncomfortable silence fell between them, RO watching Kasey as she picked at a nail on her left index finger.

After a few minutes it seemed Kasey couldn't take it anymore. "This is stupid." She looked at him. "Why are we even bothering?"

"What do you mean?" RO asked with a frown. "Are you saying you preferred when we weren't talking, passing each other in the halls and fields of HMAS Cairns, walking on eggshells or pretending nothing is wrong."

"Don't do this Robbie…"

But RO had had enough. "No Kase, let's do do this." He turned and reached for Kasey as she stood up and started for the door. Grabbing her wrist with more force than he had intended, he was shocked when Kasey stopped and listened, the earliest onset of tears evident in her eyes. "This is bigger than just this one fight isn't it?"

Kasey looked away. "It just told me that you don't understand me and what's important to me. We've got problems Robbie."

"Nothing we can't get past."

"Maybe it's best I don't come with you to Holly's party." Kasey continued as if Robert had never spoken.

"Nothing we can't get past Kase, please." He repeated.

"I can't do this anymore." Kasey pulled out of his grasp, stumbling back until she hit the bunk and straightened up. "Every time we talk we do this. It's like a snowball rolling downhill, just getting bigger and bigger until eventually it'll just burst into town and kill everyone."

"So what do we do?" RO managed eventually, having been lost for a second in the imagery of Kasey's analogy. "You clearly don't want to stop it."

"Of course I want to stop it but it's hard. You don't understand how and why you hurt me. What it meant when you asked me to leave everything I've ever known." She turned away from him, busying herself with her bunk.

"I'm sorry I ever asked you anything."

Kasey turned. "Me too, so maybe we should just go back to our own space."

"So you're leaving the Hammersley?" RO asked, shoving his hands in his pockets. He'd been waiting for this from Kasey and for some reason he didn't want to fight it.

Kasey shook her head. "No." RO frowned. "I like it here."

"This isn't going to be easy." RO watched her as she started towards the door.

She glanced back at him with one last look. "It never was Robbie." Then she left, leaving RO standing alone in the cabin wondering what would happen next.