How long had it been? Three hours? Four? Five?

My watch told me that fifteen minutes had passed. I growled to myself. I had been so sure that I could do this.

"...is Emmett's 'study'. Don't ask me what he needs a study for! Have you ever seen Emmett working? Ever?" I let her trail off and then realised that she was expecting a response. I shook my head, trying to communicate that I couldn't really care less about Emmett's study. My temper was close to boiling point. I would have thought that a psychic would be able to sense that.

"Honestly Edward, do you even care?" Alice snapped. "You could at least pretend to be interested." I growled at her then, very loudly and aggressively.

"No Alice, I do not care. Why won't you stop bothering me? Everyone else has got the message!"

Alice pulled her arm out of mine and pouted at me. From the look in her eyes, I could see that she was genuinely upset.

I've missed you, Edward. Alice told me in her thoughts.

"Did you think that I wouldn't care when my favourite brother went running off?" Alice asked me quietly. I hung my head. I hadn't realised how much Alice would miss me. She was used to her future changing and I thought that she, of all people, would have accepted the new arrangement.

"I thought you saw me coming home."

"I did."

"But you were still unhappy?" Alice brought the vision to the front of her mind. I stared at the image for a moment. I was shocked by how...dead I looked. I thought that I'd been covering up my emotions much better than that.

"I didn't know when you were coming home," Alice told me. "It could have been the next day or the next century."

"I needed time. I'm sorry for what I inflicted upon everyone. I never meant for the family to suffer alongside me." Alice gazed at me, her pixie's face unnaturally serious.

"We were always going to suffer along with you, Edward because you are the rock in this family." I was bemused for a moment. How was I the 'rock'?

"The rock? Are you sure that you're not getting me confused with Carlisle?" Alice raised an eyebrow and smirked.

"As much as I'm sure you'd like that, no, I'm not. You're the rock, the brother who's always been there. Maybe a little silent at times, maybe a little outcast but you were always there. And you could hear our thoughts. I never felt lonely when I knew that you were listening. You'd never mock me for what you heard and even if I wasn't alright, even if there was no one that I could tell, you would know. And Edward, you helped me a lot when I was a newborn. I couldn't remember anything about my human life and not knowing, at first, upset me almost as much as knowing and remembering did to Rose."

"I remember." I whispered. Alice took my arm in hers.

"But you helped me through that, when no one else could. Jasper had too much of a hard time adjusting to a 'vegetarian' life to take on all of my problems too. He felt my sadness though and although he's never said anything to you, he was very grateful to you for helping me at the time when he wasn't able to."

I wasn't able to speak. There were no words to explain to Alice exactly what hers meant to me.

"We need you in this family almost as much as we want you." Alice half-smiled and hesitated before continuing. I caught a flash of what she was going to say just a second before she opened her mouth.

"I thought you should know, my visions from last year are still clear. One day, she will be a vampire." I didn't need to ask who Alice was talking about. My chest was cut by a million knives just as I let myself think her name. To hear it, or to hear it spoken would be the worst torture of my existence. Alice's eyes glazed over with pity as she saw my reaction.

"Edward, end this pain. I can see you with her again. It's practically set in stone. You can't mess around with fate." I shook my head, as if enough movement would loosen the ties that I still felt to her. With every mention of her, I felt that they were still in place. As strong, if not stronger than the last time that I'd felt them.

"Edward, go back." Alice urged me.

"I will never return to Forks." I vowed, looking Alice straight in the eyes as I spoke. Her face fell.

"She was my best friend, Edward," Alice whispered, her voice cracking slightly. "I miss her." I leant against the door frame and closed my eyes, rubbing my temples with my fingertips.

"Alice, I can't do this now," I began but she cut in over me.

"After all we've done for you! After everything Carlisle and Esme have gone through! I can't believe that you're going to do this to us!" Alice was past anger; her body was shaking and she brought her hand to her eyes as if she were about to wipe away tears. I felt guilty beyond words but I didn't see how I could calm her.

"Alice..." I started.

"NO, EDWARD!" Alice screamed at me. "WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS? WHY ARE YOU HURTING YOURSELF LIKE THIS?" Alice was clutching a door handle that had completely crumpled in her grip. It was now moulded to fit the shape of her fist.

"Edward, I can't bear seeing you in so much...pain. Don't you realise how hard this is for us to see you this way? Can't you IMAGINE how horrible every single day is for Jasper? Not only does he have to feel his own pain and guilt but he has to sense everyone else's and hold himself responsible for it all! It's no wonder that he's hardly inside the house anymore! And I know that it's going to end and I keep telling Esme and Carlisle that. But I can't see how much longer this is going to go on for. It's killing me! I know that you'll see sense someday but I don't want you to be in pain until then."

Alice paused to compose herself. She looked straight at me and I didn't know what to think. I knew that I could never go back. But Alice seemed convinced...

"Edward, I'm sorry for what I'm about to do." I tried to look but she was blocking her mind with an annoying pop song. "This may hurt you even more but it's the future. It's YOUR future." Alice closed her eyes and winced as she forced a vision into her mind.

As soon as I caught a glimpse of it, I was out of the landing window and racing down the sloping lawn.

No. No. No. I didn't want to see that. Was Alice crazy? What did she think that the vision would do to me, apart from torture me into insanity? I snarled so loudly that the branches on a tree next to me shook. I then wrenched the entire tree out of the ground and hurled it across the nearby lake. When I reached the shore, the water was peaceful and still. I collapsed on the sandy bank and wished that it were possible for me to die.

Hard as I tried, I couldn't get the vision out of my head. I cursed Alice as I replayed it countless times, marvelling at the wonder of it and then experiencing the immense agony that came with the realisation that it could never happen.

I was sitting in some sort of waiting room, I presumed, although I was paying very little attention to the surrounding area. Alice was sitting next to me but that was nothing out of the ordinary. The best (and worst) part of Alice's vision was that Bella was curled up in my arms.

The agony I felt when I remembered the vision would have killed a human. The love that I saw in my eyes, in Bella's eyes would have been enough to persuade a weaker being to return. But I was not a weaker being. I could not be. I had to be strong, for the sake of the beautiful creature in my arms in the vision. What wouldn't I have given for that to have been a possible future for me, for us? But it was not feasible. It never would be. Thanks for the false hope, Alice.

"Mind if I cut in?"

I shifted my position in a millisecond and spun around to see Jasper standing directly behind me. I felt calm waves wash over me and I was very grateful for his gift. I would need his help a lot in the next few months, years, decades.

Alice told me what happened. Don't think badly of her.

"I don't." Which was only partly true.

She wanted you to know that even now, you still have those options.

"No, I don't," I snapped. "I won't endanger her again." I glared pointedly at Jasper and instantly regretted it. I felt his guilt swarm over both of us before he could retract it and replace it with earlier's calm.

"Thanks for that, Edward."

"I'm sorry Jas. Please forgive me. That was out of line." Jasper sat down on the sand beside me.

"How can you forgive me when I can't even forgive myself? I never expected you to forget that in hurry. It was probably one of the stupidest things that I've ever done." Jasper hung his head in shame.

"You couldn't help it. Everyone understands that."

"Why am I so weak?" Jasper muttered to himself. I sighed.

"Jas, it's not something that you can just turn on and off. It's your instinct." I didn't want him to feel guilty over something that was hurting me. One of us may as well be free from the remorse and torture.

"Are you staying with us now?" Jasper asked me, sounding very hopeful. I wasn't even sure of the answer myself.

"For a while. I don't know how long I'll last." Jasper stood up.

"I'm so sorry for everything that's happened and every part that I've played in it," Jasper whispered. "I've hurt the entire family." I slowly lifted myself up from the sandy shore.

"You're not to blame," I told him. "I shouldn't have started this in the first place."

I could feel Jasper's gratitude and I hugged him, glad that there was someone who could help to ease my suffering a little.

"I'll be there whenever you need me, bro." Jasper told me.

As we walked back to the house together, a strange calm swam over me. It was probably entirely Jasper-generated but I appreciated it all the same. Was there a chance that I could make it through this with the help, support and love of my family?

AUTHOR'S NOTE: Hi! Sorry about the huge updating gap!! I'd just like to thank some of my faithful reviewers who have stuck with the story so far! SprinkledWithTwilight, Robin.D, KrazyKarah and so many more! I think that Robin.D and SprinkledWithTwilight have reviewed every chapter so far so thank you so much!!! I never expected such a lot of response to this fic!!

Anyway, because I haven't updated any of my fics for a while, I thought I'd do two chapter for The End in one night! I just got into it and didn't want to stop writing (even though it is quite late and I have the dentist tomorrow morning at 8.30am :(

I have exams until June 17th and during that time I am likely to be V BAD at updating regularly. Writing fan fics makes a great break from revision but I may not have a lot of time. After June 17th, I will have unlimited spare time in the day and my aim then is to get all my current fics finished off before the summer hols are over. I have a few ideas for some more and if anyone else has any that they'd like to see me write, please tell me in a review!!

All I can say now is this author's note is almost as long as my chapter :S and I hope you are all enjoying the story!! Thank you SO MUCH to all my lovely reviewers, I LOVE YOU ALL, I really do!!

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El Leon Y La Oveja