They told me be careful
They said be weary of you
They warn persistence is the fatal flaw
I find myself waiting
I find myself hoping that you
One day fall into my open arms
But it's ok, you can just call me friend
Even though I mind I'll just take the backseat again
Cause in the end I'm here
In the end just sit and stare
The seasons change not making way
As I'm just waiting, waiting, waiting for you
I've been here a time or two
Trying to fight the dying breath
Why is every step I take so damn hard?
I've got some battle wounds from this
I've got the sinking feeling in my skin
I'm getting tired of the night
I've waiting for the light
Chapter 14: Fatal Flaw
Bella:
My eyes slowly opened and I blinked a couple times rapidly, trying to clear my vision.
Everything seemed titled and blurry.
I turned my head a little more to the side and found my face pressed into a pillow.
What the hell?
I lifted my head-too fast-and the whole room erupted in a bounding wave through my head.
"Fuck," I muttered quietly to myself.
My eyes finally adjusted and I nearly had a heart attack.
This was Edward's room.
This was Edward's bed.
And I was in it!
Once again I sharply turned my head to the right causing another throb of pain but I ignored it and my eyes zoomed in on Edward's face.
He was asleep.
One arm under the pillow his head was under, clutching it tightly and the other I found was wrapped around my waist.
What. The. Fuck.
And his arm was completely bare.
I could even see his shoulders from underneath the comforter…
FUCK!
Not caring if I woke him up or not I quickly through the comforter off and to my relief and surprise found I was in my jeans but my sweat shirt was off which left me in my tank top.
Edward was shirtless but wearing his jeans as well.
Thank God.
That meant we hadn't done anything too serious.
We couldn't have…
"Ugh!" The sound of his deep voice took me from my thoughts with a shock.
I turned to look at him and saw his eyes were half open, staring at me and when he caught my gaze he smiled the happiest, perfect smile I had ever seen on him.
"Good morning." He said, still smiling.
What the hell?!
"Good morning?! No this is a bad morning! What the hell happened last night?"
His smiled wavered.
"You don't remember?" He whispered.
"Of course not! Otherwise I wouldn't be asking you!"
He flinched at my tone but I didn't care. I needed answers and I needed them now.
"Just um, a lot of uh kissing." He mumbled.
"That's it?!"
"Yes."
"Then why am I just wearing my tank top and you have no shirt on?!"
He looked down at his chest as if he just realized that.
"Oh, well uh we were going to go farther but we um kinda passed out I guess."
I rolled my eyes. "Were you even drunk?! I don't remember anything! And you remember it all it seems." My anger was rising.
"NO! We were both drunk. Maybe you were more than me I don't know. But I was drunk too, Bella. But I thought. Last night…was amazing…and I just thought that we…were uh you know...together…..?"
"Well, you thought wrong. Whatever happened last night…it was a mistake."
His face was crest fallen.
And his eyes held a look as if I Just crushed his whole world.
My heart tugged at the sight of this but I couldn't let him know that…
His green eyes looked down at his hands.
"Oh, I…I…Understand." He whispered after a long moment.
I took a deep breath and got out of the bed.
"Alright. Look, I'm sorry about whatever happened. But it can't happen again. Ok?"
"Ok." He whispered brokenly, still not meeting my gaze.
I grabbed my shoes and sweatshirt and headed towards the door, I opened it and stepped halfway out and turned back to him.
He was still staring at his hands on the bed but now he was sitting up.
I took another deep breath.
"Ok. Um I'll be downstairs." I mumbled and just before I shut the door I could have sworn I heard him mumble: "I Love you."
But I didn't pause or turn back around to see if he did I just continued making my way down stairs while my heart drifted further and further away from me.
Edward:
"I love you." I whispered as she shut the door.
On me, on everything we had last night.
I knew it was all too good to be true.
But they say when you're drunk it brings out the truth.
After all we shared last night she had to love me too.
She had to…….
FLASHBACK:
She looked up at me with wide, confused, startled dark brown eyes.
"What are you doingggggg?" She asked.
I slowly bent my head towards hers and placed my hand against the side of her face.
"What does it look like?" I whispered just before my lips came crashing down on hers.
She gasped into my mouth and I took that opportunity to push my tongue into hers.
She moaned and wrapped her arms tightly around my neck.
YES, my mind screamed. She was responding! She was kissing me back!
I broke away from her for only a second to open the door to my bedroom and then tugged her in, shutting the door behind her.
Her lips immediately went back to mine and I took no time in responding to her kiss.
Her lips were urgent and fierce against mine as mine were on hers.
After all this was only what I had been waiting for, for such a long time.
I missed the feel of her lips on mine.
I missed her so much…
"Edward" She mumbled against my lips.
"Bella" I whispered back, still kissing her.
She stepped back and stared up at me.
"I love you." She whispered and my whole world was on fire.
"I love you too. You have no idea how long I've wanted to hear you say that." And my lips were once again back on hers.
She backed me up till my legs hit the bed and pushed me down, falling on top of me.
She giggled and started unbuttoning my shirt.
"Bella-" I warned in a chocked whisper.
Her head snapped up and her dark eyes looked deep into mine.
I couldn't breathe.
"Yes? She purred seductively.
"We...I…you… Shouldn't…." I couldn't even form a coherent sentence.
"Shhhhh." She shushed me and went back to unbuttoning my shirt.
When she had all the buttons undone she slowly pushed it from my arms, I sat up and took it off, throwing it somewhere on the floor.
Her warm soft lips then went to my chest and that was nearly my undoing.
"Bella." I moaned.
Her lips made it all the way to my ear where she bit down and gently took my earlobe in between her teeth, I gasped in surprise.
"Yes?" She whispered.
I moaned again and flipped us over and unzipped her sweatshirt, throwing it some where on the floor as well.
I pushed her tank top up and started kissing her smooth flat stomach.
"Edward" She breathed.
I smiled and looked into her eyes.
"Yes?" I whispered tauntingly like she had done to me.
She smiled and whispered, "I love you."
And all I could think was how unbelievably lucky I was to finally have her.
To finally have found someone I truly loved…
END OF FLASHBAK:
And now all that was gone.
I wouldn't be able to hold her, kiss her or touch her again.
I wouldn't be able to tell her how much I loved her and watch her smile light my world as she told me she loved me too.
It was all gone.
I sighed and got out of bed trying my best not to look at it.
I already was thinking too much about last night.
And as much as it pained me to have to pretend it didn't happen I had to.
That Bella from last night was gone.
And this Bella-the one that haunted my dreams and thoughts reminding me of how much I hurt her-that Bella was all I would ever get.
After all I didn't deserve her love anyway.
Bella:
"ROSE!" The loud yell from Alice snapped me from my thoughts.
And I quickly rushed in Alice's room to see what was going on.
"What the hell were you thinking?!" Alice hissed and Rose flinched.
"I don't know. The pregnancy test was wrong. And I'm not pregnant! And it's a good thing. But Emmett was sort of excited about the fact that I possibly might be having a baby."
What the fuck? "Woah what's going on?" I asked confused.
Alice and Rose looked at me like they just realized I was in the room.
"I'll tell you what's going on! Little miss fake baby over here was drinking last night which is fine sense she's not pregnant. But Emmett doesn't know that and when she found out she had a couple drinks flipped out and now she tells him guess what I'm not pregnant! And he's a bit upset." Alice said in a rush.
There was just waaaaaaaaay too much going on this early in the morning.
"Um ok. There's just too much going on right now. I don't know what tell you." I mumbled and left the room.
I had enough of my own shit to deal with I didn't need this too.
I felt the pressure of a body hitting mine and I looked up quick to see it was of course; Edward.
"I-I'm sorry…" He babbled on and on and all I could think about was how different he was from the person I had thought wanted to be with me. Now he did.
Or maybe this was all a joke too? I honestly didn't know anymore.
"It's fine." I snapped.
And I saw something in his eyes that made the coldness in my heart and voice stop short; the misery that ran across his eyes and face. That couldn't be fake. Could it?
And then tears started uncontrollably falling from my eyes.
"What?! What's wrong, Bella? Bella talk to me, please!"
Edward's worried voice only brought on more and more tears.
And then his strong warm arms wrapped around me and I felt like I was home.
A feeling I never felt with anyone.
"I'm so sorry, Bella. I love you, I love you." He said over and over again. And the tears didn't stop for a long while but neither did his hold on me. He left me cry it out evening shedding tears of his own.
Not for a second did he leave me or let me go.
And I found thinking against my will that this, this beautiful person is someone I could see myself with.
Someone I could give my heart to for I finally realized I never truly had in the beginning anyway.
And the tears fell down harder and his grip held on tighter.
And I found that I was finally home; where I belonged.
I'm so sorry I'm a fucking lazy ass & I have these fucking long ass apologizes over and over and over again. My best fraaaaaaynd Tiff is with me now she says: HAAAAAAAAAAAY! But getting back to the point: I've been lazy (as always) & busy with other shiz. G-pa died the 14th plus high school is coming up AHHHHHHHHHHHH! It's kinda boring and I don't wanna go! D: God, this is depressing. Okay so yeah that was a bit of my rant. Now back to about the story: There's about five more chapters to go & yes it will be done. I promise. And I will do my best to not have long waits like this again. I so sorry D: Please, please continue to read and check back for updates. You guys are awesome! I love you all :D
OH! And our 180th reviewer was: twlightfanatic68So yes she got a quote from this chapter a longggggggggggg time ago. Still want to be the 200th reviewer before the last chapter is posted?Then hurry up! There's only 4 more chapters till the final chapter! And remember you can only review ONCE. No cheating ;
Thanks again for sticking with me through this story & make sure you check for new chapters & review, review, review! :D