Loss of Faith

Chapter 19: Never Said Goodbye

Disclaimer: I do not own any of the recognizable characters contained within.

That would be Joss Whedon, Mutant Enemy, etc….

Faith's POV –

"She's gonna be okay, she's gonna be okay, she's gonna be okay,….." I'm repeatin it over and over in my head as I run to my bike. I gotta get to the house though, if that goddamn newbie manages to poison B I don't know what I'll do. I know that Buff could mop the floors up with the mini-slayer pretty much any day of the week, but there's always the chance that she might be caught off guard. Especially if it's a surprise attack in our home. I know she wouldn't be expectin Shannon to show up there. As far as B knows, the newbie doesn't even know where I live. If B started feeling slayer tingles, she might just assume it's me comin home and do something crazy like walk out naked to greet me. I pull my cell phone from my pocket as I run through the school's front doors. Dialin home, it starts ringing, two, three, four……then it's picked up. "B,' I yell into it, "Ya gotta get outta the house……."

"Ya got Faith……. Leave a message and I'll catch up to ya later…….you know the drill……BEEP." Interrupts' me.

Shit I forgot about the freakin answering machine. "B….Buffy……pick up the phone! B, are ya there? If ya get this….ya gotta watch out for the new slayer. I think she's on her way over there. She's got some kinda poison specially made for vamps…..Buffy if you're there just get out for awhile. I'm on my way home now. Please…be careful…." I'm at the bike and jam the phone in my pocket as I throw a leg over and kick start it in one motion. I hit the gears and gun the engine leaving twenty feet of rubber on the road as I roar away from the school.

I'm zipppin through the streets of Sunnydale, dodging cars, runnin lights and stop signs. Luckily the cops are nowhere to be seen, as usual for around here. Not that I would stop for them right now, but it could get a little tense if they were to follow me home. I'm not feelin very charitable right now. I pull up the driveway and jump off my bike letting it keep rolling into the bushes. If everythin is okay I'll check it later, right now I just wanna see that B's alright.

Runnin up to the door my stomach starts to fill with tension. The door is hangin open and the handle is warped out of shape, like something crushed it in its hand. If that little bitch has done anything to hurt Buffy I'm gonna kill her. I don't care how bad a life she had while with the Council. I'm gonna rain down on her so bad, she'll wish she never heard of Sunnydale, vampires or slayers. Then I'm gonna take a trip to merry old England and clean house over there.

Pushin the door open slowly I listen for a minute. I don't hear any sounds of a fight so I let out the slayer sense, trying to feel B. She's here that much I know. I feel a slight tingle from the mini, but then it's gone, so either she's just left or B killed her. I'm hopin for the last one, but I never get what I want in life. Movin further into the house I head for the livin room. I feel the tension growin inside me with each step I take and it's so quiet in here I wanna scream.

I can't take it anymore so I call out, "Hey B! Where ya at?" No answer, that can't be good. "B…..Buffy? Did ya get my message?" I look over to the table the phone sits on and see that the phone is ripped out of the wall and layin on the floor. Movin faster, I go deeper into the room heading for the doors to the courtyard that are standing partway open. As I round the couch I find B….. and almost trip over her.

She's laying on the floor with blood pourin out of her side. Her eyes are kinda glazed over and there's small cuts all over her arms and face. My knees crumble out from under me and I almost fall on top of her in my rush to touch her. "B… Buffy, can you hear me, baby?" I say in a choked voice. She's not answering me. It's getting hard to see her through the tears runnin outta my eyes. I wipe them away with my arm and start to look her over to see how bad the damage is.

Her whole body is shivering and her arms and legs keep givin small jerks every few minutes. That's the only way I can tell she's still alive. While I'm lookin her over, I see that the gem of Amara in gone from her finger. That must be why she's bleedin so bad. That bitch musta gotten it offa B during the fight, probably the only thing that kept her from stakin Buffy on the spot was me comin back when I did. I don't wanna think about what I woulda found if I had been just a few seconds later. I do know that I woulda torn this whole shitty little town apart findin that bitch to get revenge. I still might.

I grab my phone and call Xand. He answers on the first ring and I start talkin right over him, "Xand, it's me. She got to Buffy. It's pretty bad, Xand. Did ya get Willow?"

"Oh Christ, Faith," he says and I can hear the worry in his voice. "Yea, she's just finishing up with the guy she tutors."

"Get her and bring her here. Now." I tell him. "And Xand? Find Joyce and bring her too. She should be almost home by now."

"Joyce? Are you sure that's a good idea? Giles might not want to break the news about Buffy to her like that," he answers.

"I don't give a fuck what Giles wants," I scream at him. "You get Red and Joyce and bring them both over here right now. It might be the only chance Joyce gets to see her. Ya hearin me? Move your ass."

I hang up and throw the phone onto the table. Leanin over I gather Buffy in my arms as gently as I can and lift her up. I carry her through to the den and lay her on the couch in there. I run upstairs and grab a blanket and pillow for her to try and make her more comfortable. On my way back I grab the first aid kit I always keep stocked. When I get back to Buffy she's kinda moaning and mumbling. I can't make out what she's sayin, but can feel the pain in her words and I feel my heart startin to break all over again. Every time I think things are gonna work out for me, every time I let my defenses down, something comes along to rip me up. Ya know what? This time I'm gonna spread the pain around. Let them feel what it's like. Let them have their heart's ripped outta their chests.

I slowly lift up her shirt to see the wound that's there. It's a stab wound about three inches long and sitting low on her left side. Bein a vamp, it shouldn't of even slowed her down much and if she was still wearin the ring, it woulda healed right up. As I clean it off there's a trace of some purple tinged stuff at the edges of the cut. It must be that poison the Council sent over. I'm bettin the bitch coated a knife in it for when she ran into Buffy again. B woulda just laughed at the knife and thought nothing of it if she was cut a little. She woulda been more pissed at havin her shirt ruined than bein nicked by a wanna-be's blade.

Lookin at all the small cuts I get a real bad visual of that bitch sittin on top of Buffy while she lays there helpless from the poison. I can see her slowly usin her knife to make small cuts all over B, just letting her bleed out. I feel the rage building higher inside me as I see her playin with the knife, drawin out the pain, just waitin for the final moment when she will plunge a stake into Buffy ending her life forever. My hands start shakin as I realize this wasn't just about killin a vamp cause she thought it was the right thing to do. This was about torturing someone I cared about. I mighta been able to understand if she was just tryin to do her duty as a slayer, but this was more along the lines of killin B while causin me as much pain as she could. I knew in those minutes that Shannon's hours on this earth were numbered. From the moment she went from slayer to calculating murderer, she gave up her rights as a human. I don't kill humans, but this time I'm gonna make an exception. And I'm gonna enjoy it.

I get the wounds cleaned up as best I could and put a dressin on the stab wound it to keep it covered. The gauze that has the poison on it I set to the side so Red can take a look at it. Maybe she can come up with an antidote or something. She's gotta be able to find a cure, she's just gotta. With the bandage on I don't have anything else to do to keep my mind busy and the bad thoughts are startin to creep in. I start seein every single scenario where I can do nothing and B dies on me. I'm getting so edgy that I start pacin, stopping every once in a while to check B, hopin that there's a change for the better. Hopin that somehow she's gonna throw off the poison and be alright. Hopin that she wakes up long enough for me to tell her how much I love and need her.

I can feel the sun's startin to set and I can finally hear Xander's car pull to a stop out front. It sounds like Giles' car is right behind him. As they come in through the front door I go to meet them and move straight over to Joyce. She has a look of shock on her face, but not surprise. Red's standin there lookin very uncomfortable, but at least she's got her laptop carry case in her hand. It looks like Xand or Giles gave her the low down about her new best bud on the way over. I'm hopin she gets it, cause I'm not in the mood to start arguing with her. I just want her to get with the researchin and find me a cure.

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you sooner," I say to Joyce. "We thought there would be time, ya know, after we got settled and……………"

She wraps her arms around me and whispers, "I've read your journal, Faith, and I know what happened to her. What happened to you both. I know how much you love her and want to protect her. Thank you for letting me see her again. I never got to say goodbye last time." Then she kisses the side of my head and I just about start bawlin right there. "Let's go see our girl," she says softly.

We break apart and I lead her by the hand in to see the daughter she lost, then found, and now might lose again.