Chapter 3

Author's Note: I wanna say thanks to Rach for the extra fast work. And I'm sending a hug to each of you who left me a review. I don't know which review is I replied and which not, this message system is a bit still new for me, but now I say thanks to negschainshaw, OSUSprinks, majorienescio, Kristi-Julie, Vluy, Firing Rockets on Dragons, bluegirl-783 and to One Special Lana. I love you all. And I wanna send a special hug to my dearest Ursa, thank you dear. And just a quick note: This is a chapter for Lucy to cheer her up a bit.

"Or what?!... I will show you! GUARDS!" shouted Clarisse.

Her voice was strong and determined, and echoed long after she finished… Then there was silence. Total, deafening silence… They just stood there as if in a western movie, standing opposite, glaring at each other with distrust. Clarisse was angry and furious, while Joseph was calm, and that was far worse than anything else. It was simply irritating for her, she was even more furious than before.

Not long after she screamed, Shades and Lionel appeared in the doorway in full armor. They tried to get in at the same time, so they were nearly stuck in the doorframe.

"Is everything ok?" asked Shades breathlessly, checking the room from one corner to the other. "We heard screaming. Your Majesty?" he asked again. "Is there a problem?"

But Clarisse did not answer. She just turned to Joseph with a questioning look on her face. It was challenging and triumphant at the same time.

"No," Joseph answered shortly, holding her gaze for a moment. "There is no problem at all." He sighed and with a meaningful look, he left the room. Shades and Lionel stood there at a loss for what to do. They really had no idea what had happened.

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Joseph's way led across the garden, trying to find some moments of peace. He was upset, but seeing her suffering was terrible for him, because he well knew that she would butcher herself over it and he could not do anything to stop it. It was like hell.

By choice he would have taken her into his arms, but even touching her was too dangerous, and after all this he had no chance to get close to her, so he was upset but not about her behavior, only about his helplessness. As hard as he tried to get close to her, she worked just as hard to push him away. It was a devil's circle and what is more it was ridiculous. He was the closest person in her life, but at the same time he could not have been further away from her. He knew he could get nearly any woman in the world, but the only one he was interested in was the most unreachable.

And that's why he should've felt unlucky about this, but strangely he was rather happy. Happy because he found the only woman who worth the fight, the only woman who could make him feel like this. Make him feel like anything is possible… But now, as much as he tried to get close to her, he felt he might lose her forever, which was terrifying. And to top it all off, he knew he couldn't control the situation, and that was the most difficult thing he could ever imagine. His whole life was about control. And now he was in a totally new field… on a battlefield, where he had no guns, no maps, not even a magic wand. Absolutely nothing. She was slipping through his fingers and he could not do anything to stop it.

Suddenly he felt dirty. He wanted to wash off, he needed to wash off the memory of this day, so he headed up to his room and almost tore up the bathroom door, where a few moments later the relaxing hot water started its job on his tired muscles…

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Clarisse felt nothing but emptiness… She was in a strange mental state, when someone can see the world from outside their body, as if they were dead already. Everything that surrounded her seemed so unreal. The lights, the shapes, the smells. And the worst of it was she felt so dizzy that she barely could walk, but this was far from everything. A strange humming silence wrapped her body, so she could barely hear anything from the outside world, while she was not able to think she did things automatically.

Her way on the long, dark staircase was slow. She took every step with force, forced her muscles to fulfill her orders. As she placed her hand on the doorknob the cold surface woke her up a little, but she had no intention to knock on the door, instead she stepped inside.

The room was dark, but not completely, a dim light made the furniture and the other things in the room visible, but it came not from the window. It came from a half opened door, a half opened bathroom door. Now she heard water flowing, a sound that had been there from the beginning, but she'd just recognized it somehow.

Everything was familiar, the dark bedspread on the bed, his black jacket on the wardrobe door… and the smell. His smell. This well known, overwhelming smell, which could drive her crazy and make her feel relaxed at the same time. She would have loved to climb in his bed and wrap herself with this warm, relaxing feeling, but instead she just sat down and picked up his shirt which was even more filled with him. The feeling of him.

Smelling his shirt, grabbing it desperately, was the last straw for her. Suddenly she was in real world again, realizing what the hell was she doing… But as she heard the water even louder she was in trance again. She must get closer, so she stood up and went to the bathroom door. The light was stronger as she pushed the door open and leaned against the doorframe. And there he was… a shadow on the glass, but it did not matter. She knew it was Joseph… her Joseph, the man who captured her heart before she could do anything against it, the man who always left her shaking, the man who always made those butterflies in her stomach… She has never known that this kind of a feeling could exist. A feeling that could force her to turn her back on her life. Yes, she knew if she could free this feeling inside, she could turn her life upside-down… for him, and it scared her. Scared her to death… But as she was fighting with her thoughts like this she did not realize that Joseph was already standing in front of her in a towel…

To be continued…