Winter Solstice.
I was going to put the 2 episodes together, but since this one was so freakin long that I decided not to.
Happy reading! :D
…
Aang: Omg dudes. What are we doing? I forgot.
Sokka: We're going to the North Pole remember? So you can learn water bending?
Aang: Oh yeah… HEY WHAT'S THAT?
Sokka: The whole forest has burned down! It looks like a giant scar.
Katara: Scar…. Zuuuuuukoooo. Must have Zuuuukooooo!
Aang: Aw gosh, now look what you've started!
Sokka: Sorry, It's not my fault she's obsessed with the guy!
Appa: Oh Momo?
Momo: Whut?
Appa: I was wondering… I was on the Inter-web earlier and I found this thing called 'shipping'…
Momo: Yo Dawg, whutz your point?
Appa: What do you ship? Kataang or Zutara?
Momo: Whut?
Appa: Those are the shipments, I didn't get to read it all, but which one sounds better to you?
Momo: Aw, I guess Zutara cause it sounds sexy.
Appa: I pick Kataang, because Aang's name is on the back! I absolutely adore that avatar!
Momo: Dude, you too pathetic. I should create a ship! Apaang!
Appa: Oh that's just delightful! I will ship that always!
Momo: Aw dang. T-T
Aang: Aw, I' so sad, I must roll around in the ash to make myself emo.
Me: HEY!
Aang: Sorry, Sorry, didn't mean to offend you oh great Emo writer!
Me: You better be!
Aang: Heh, heh… (lands) Oh poor poor soil! (rolls around on the ground) I feel your undying pain! You have been raped by the fire! I wish I could only resurrect you from this gray and lifeless ash! I feel as if I myself am dying inside from just being around you. The rocks are colder, trees slump in despair, and if only you were to be alive and green again! That would truly…..
Katara: ZOMG! SHUT UP! (gives Aang acorn) here take this.
Aang: What is this supposed to be?
Katara: I dunno, it's an acorn. But I saw a squirrel getting friendly with it so I thought you might like it.
Aang: I shall treasure it always!
Sokka: Hey, it's an old man! Let's shoot him!
Katara: Shoot him with what?
Sokka: A gun… like you know Zuko had to shoot you with back in Kyoshi Island?
Aang: But Sokka, there are no guns here! This is a rural Asian country, in which we write in an Asian language, but we somehow speak English.
Old man: Please, bald brat, my village needs you!
Aang: Will you pay me?
Old man: No.
Aang: Ok, let's go!
MEANWHILE… IN ZUKO'S WORLD!
Zuko: UUUNCLE! Where are you?
Iroh: Shaddup, I'm in this geyser!
Zuko: Oh no! Iroh, are you stuck again? I'll get the butter and the whip!
Iroh: Thank you for your offer but I'm fine! I'm…. relaxing in this hot spring!
Zuko: Oh… Dear lord! You're… NAKED! And who knows what you're doing in there! Just be back at the ship in 30 mins, or else the crew will start doing those…. 'things' again.
Iroh: Slow your roll Senior Cranky butt! I'll be there!
Zuko: Ugh, you'd better!
BACK AT THE WIMPY LITTLE VILLAGE OF YOURMOM!
Old man: See, there's this monster dude that takes away your town's virgins each and every night. Can you kick his ass for us, oh great and peaceful Air monk?
Aang: I'll try old man, I'll try.
MEANWHILE
Iroh: Wow, I was in there for a long time. Well, hello there Mr. Squirrel! My my! Aren't you affectionate?
Earth Kingdom soldier 1: Oh my god! He's molesting a squirrel! Arrest him!
Iroh: I was not! Since when is stroking behind the ears molesting?
Earth Kingdom soldier 2: When 'behind the ears' is the tail area. 'Let's go General Iroh!'
Iroh: Aw crap. I've done it again!
MEANWHILE
Aang: There it is!
Hei-Bai: Rawr. I' m gonna take all of the virgins!
Aang: Oh no! I must stop him! (hits with stick)
Hei-Bai: RAWR! Ok, you are too stupid to care about, so I will ignore you!
Sokka: Oh no! Aang's getting whooped! I have to help! (Runs to Aang's rescue)
Katara: (sarcastically) No. Sokka. Stop.
Hei-Bai: Rawr. Hey look! I'm gonna take you with me! (Picks up sokka and runs)
Sokka: Wait? How am I a virgin? HELP ME!
Aang: Sokka! I'll' save you! (Puts on superman cape)
Hei-Bai: I'm going to disappear inside this rock now! (Disappears inside rock)
Aang: Aw crap. What am I going to do now? I know! I'll sit on top of the rock and look constipated!
MEANWHILE!
Zuko: UNCLE! The crew just watched Moulin Rouge, and it is NOT pretty! Please get off of your butt and teach them how to can-can properly!... Hey, UNCLE WAS CAPTURED! I'll save you! (Puts on superman cape and follows the trail of Uncle Iroh!)
MEANWHILE!
Aang: Hey…. I'm all blue-y! Yeah!
Fang: Rawr. Get on my back kid! I have candy!
Aang: Hey, you're Roku's dragon!
Fang: Rawr. Yeah get on my back before you ride in my mouth!
Aang: Ok, I'll get on your back!
Fang: Finally you twit! (they fly!)
Aang: So… when the light hit's Roku on the solstice… I'll be able to do da cha–cha with him?
Fang: Sure. Why not. (they fly home)
MEANWHILE!
Iroh: You put me in a diaper. You guys suck.
Earth Kingdom soldier 1: No dur.
Zuko: Uncle! I am here to rescue you! (kick soldiers In the groin)
Earth Kingdom solider 2: Oh.. dear… lord. (passes out)
MEANWHILE!
Hei-Bai: Rawr! I want more virgins!
Aang: No! Have this Acorn!
Hei-Bai. Ok. (leaves)
Sokka: Oh my god. That was scary.
Katara: Why? Where you raped?
Sokka: No! WORSE! He made all play CHESS! And watch educational television!
Aang: That's rough buddy.
…
Omg. That last line was Zuko's from Boiling rock! YAY!