Wings
Chapter 5
The coffee, severely black - Tomoyo could even see her own reflection if she looked into the cup - was served in the most exquisite Chinese porcelain. Her mother always used it when they had important guests in the house and Tomoyo definitely thought of her guests as important and… well, cute. Most especially their outfit and that white little…
"He's more of a thing, really." Kurogane said noticing the curious stare she was directing at the white fluffy bunny meets penguin sort of hybrid.
The Daidouji household had never entertained guest such as them. Travelers from another dimension, another time line. Her mother would definitely approve of the use of her precious fine Chinaware, Tomoyo thought with great pleasure.
"Mokona is not a thing!" It said, jumping from the couch it was sitting upon and perching itself on top of the table. It made a clumsy sort of pirouette, white bunny ears flopping at every turn. It stopped abruptly and faced her, giving her a small curtsey. It smiled at Tomoyo and Tomoyo smiled back, barely containing the urge to squee, grab it and hug it to death.
"Mokona is Mokona!" It declared, as though the statement was supposed to make sense.
Tomoyo was quickly reminded of the little yellow lion vacationing in China with Sakura-chan. Could they be related? Tomoyo wondered, smiling slowly. "Hello there, Mokona." She said, reaching out to gently pat Mokona in the head. "You're so cute."
"So are you! So are you!" Mokona said, jumping into her arms. "We're both so cute! We're both so cute!" It said almost childlike, patting her head, eyes large as saucers and shining with tears. Tomoyo giggled.
"Like I said," Kurogane interrupted, shrugging his shoulders with an air of measured grace, "he's more a freaky little thing."
"Oh, Kuro-chan, don't be like that! You might hurt Mokona's feeling." Fai said, admonishing Kurogane and, not for the first time, Tomoyo wondered if she could call the tall dark man Kuro-chan as well. Kuro-chan. It was so endearing! She turned her eyes towards him, just in time to see the vein in his temple pulsing.
"Don't call me that!" He roared, sending the cups rattling.
Guess not, Tomoyo thought as she quickly reached out to steady the cups, watching Kurogane from the corner of her eyes, tilting her head and trying to figure him out. He has the most direct and intense gaze and his eyes somehow reminded him of Sakura-chan's older brother – almost, always expressionless, unless you really looked deeply into them. Something about him was so… masculine and she had to admit that if he hadn't called her princess on the street, in front of practically all of Tomodea to hear, she wouldn't have invited them over for coffee.
Of course, there was the fact that she felt an almost instant and familiar connection with all three of them. It was as if she had known them – like from a dream or something. But the tug of familiarity was particularly stronger towards Kurogane.
Tomoyo made quick glances towards her guests and smiled to herself. Even with the brief introductions they were still strangers to her but they didn't seem dangerous at all, in fact when she had first seen them, they had seemed so lost. Apart from looking so utterly out of place, the other thing that made her notice them was that they had been walking around town with Mokona bouncing and flying all over the place. Being friends with Sakura and Kero, she was used to seeing strange things – things that logic could not explain, things that weren't normal. And Mokona certainly belonged to that category. She had been keen on getting Mokona out of the public eye as it's not everyday that the townspeople would be greeted by a talking white stuffed toy.
She had hurriedly explained that it was the latest model, battery operated with the newest state of the art microchip imbedded inside it. There were impressed "ooohhss" and "ahhhhsss" and when one of the locals tried to touch Mokona, Tomoyo decided she ought to take them somewhere else, away from the curious glances and insistent queries on where they could order their own Mokona's.
She didn't know why, but without any hesitation, she had grabbed Kurogane's hand (almost instinctively) and proceeded to drag him away from the growing crowd of onlookers. His other two companions had no choice but to follow. It wasn't until they were rounding off a corner when Mokona exclaimed that they ought to find Sakura and Syoran soon.
At the instant, she knew it with certainty: it was no coincidence that these strange people knew about Sakura and Syaoran. The mere mention of her friends' name was enough to send Tomoyo into a state of pure excitement. It had been years since anything interesting had happened to Tomodea. Perhaps this was another chance to create more lovely costumes for Sakura-chan! Oh, she couldn't wait! She had terrible missed the card-capturing days and in between going to school and trying to make a film-bio for Sakura-chan, life had became almost unbearably monotonous.
With that thought in mind, instead of taking them to a local café as she had originally planed, she decided to bring them to a safer place. Her house was the only perfect location. She hadn't even thought twice about it. After all, if they were looking for Sakura and Syaoran, they can't be bad people, right?
Besides, bad people won't be caught dead carrying something as cute as Mokona. It would be against some universal law creed for vile and nasty villains.
And now here they were, sitting around the small antique mahogany table, looking at each other with big, bright expectant eyes. After a few seconds of silence, Fai shifted in his seat and delicately sipped his coffee. Kurogane, Tomoyo couldn't help but notice, was already finished with his cup, having drank it in one huge gulp. She re-filled it for him, suddenly aware of his eyes following her every move. Oh, he has such an intense gaze, Tomoyo thought, shivering pleasantly.
"So…" Fai began smiling his friendly smile, the topic of what exactly Mokona was supposed to be already forgotten. He leaned towards the table and regarded Tomoyo with dancing blue eyes. Everything about him seemed so cheerful, Tomoyo thought; even his hair was such a happy, sunny color.
"You've been friends with Sakura-chan for a long while now, yes?" Fai asked.
"Yes." Tomoyo said, nodding her head and smiling at the memory. "Since they moved here with her father and brother and we've been friends ever since. We've been friends forever!"
"But they are not the Sakura and Syoran that we're looking for." Kurogane interrupted rather impatiently. "I don't see why we need to talk about the Sakura and Syaoran of this world. They're not even here!"
She had told them that Sakura and Syaoran were out of the country, on a vacation. Mokona had been so terribly excited about the idea of Syaoran and Sakura vacationing in some other exotic land that it took both Kurogane (his threats) and Fai (his patient explanations) to assure Mokona that they were talking about a different Sakura and Syaoran. Mokona thought it was terribly funny and amusing while Tomoyo had been somewhat disappointed. It didn't seem like they'd be looking for any new cards or adventure anytime soon. There were after all many girls named Sakura – it was a popular name. She wasn't sure about Chinese boys' name, though.
It took them a while to establish that essentially, her Sakura and Syaoran and their Sakura and Syaoran are the same person.
"In theory, of course." Fai-san had said.
Tomoyo wrinkled her nose, still somewhat finding the idea of having two Syaorans and Sakuras – hers and theirs – all too confusing.
"Hm. You're right." Fai said, thoughtfully nodding his head, his blonde hair falling over his eyes, smiling like a Cheshire cat. "I just thought it interesting that we stumbled upon a world that has their very own Sakura and Syaoran. That has never happened before."
"Well, so what?" Kurogane asked in a challenging voice. "It's not the weirdest thing we've ever encountered." He argued, remembering the little bunnies and the twister with an attitude. That had been freaky.
"That's true." Fai agreed genially. He paused and then tilted his head, "But does that mean that there's another world that has another Fai and Kuro-nii in it?"
That erased the sneer off Kurogane's face.
"And Mokona too!" Mokona announced, jumping into Fai's lap.
"And Mokona too, ofcourse." Fai said, cuddling Mokona while Kurogane made gagging motions.
"Am I in other worlds too?" Tomoyo asked suddenly curious. Perhaps that would explain the connection she felt towards them.
"Well, yes, you are." Fai informed her, his startlingly blue eyes peering at her over the gold fringes of his bangs. "In fact, in Kuro-pipi's world, you're his princess and he's your run off the mill, psychotic black ninja."
"I was?" Tomoyo asked, clasping her hands in delight. A princess! She wondered what sort of princess she was. And Kurogane was her ninja!
"I am not a psychotic black ninja!" Kurogane raged. "You take that back!" He ordered Fai who merely chuckled, waving his hands dismissively in the air.
"Kuro-chan, psychotic black ninja!" Mokona echoed.
Kurogane looked like he was an inch close to stomping Mokona to death. His dark eyes were glittering with barely concealed rage. "Do you want to die?" He growled at Mokona who was still bouncing happily from one chair to another, flying past Kurogane's own head, as though tempting Kurogane to pluck him out of the air.
"You were really mean to him." Fai continued, ignoring Kurogane who was now trying to strangle Mokona.
Tomoyo was torn between listening to Fai and his story about Princess Tomoyo and her ninja and watching with alarm as Kurogane's wrapped his hand around Mokona's throat. "Oh, ano," Tomoyo began in a nervous voice, "uhm, Kurogane… I mean, Mister Kurogane sir, aren't you hurting him?"
"That's the idea." Kurogane said through gritted teeth.
Tomoyo winced. She was used to seeing violence of course. Touya-kun and Syaoran had muttered so many death threats to each other that she already has a well of information on how one can kill one with nothing but a plastic ruler. She turned worried ever over Mokona who was… actually giggling?
"That tickles! That tickles!" Mokona squealed with delight.
Tomoyo looked at Fai, her expression a mixture of confused amusement. "Are they always…"
"Always." Fai nodded somewhat gravely as they briefly watched Kurogane struggled with Mokono who by now was in tears from laughing so hard.
Tomoyo though she heard Kurogane mumble: "You. Just. Won't. Die." But she figured she had heard him wrong. She turned curious eyes back to Fai and asked about the Princess.
"Oh, yes. Well, Kurogane won't say much, but as far as I know, you sent him to other dimensions and put a curse in him too." Fai informed her.
Tomoyo gasped, clutching her heart. "I did?" She asked, sounding quite alarmed. Could she have done such things? How horrible of her!
"Shut up!" Kurogane snarled, not quite meeting anyone's eyes.
"And Kuro-minmin here, he's been trying to get back home. Back to you, or rather, back to his Tomoyo." Fai winked at her as he finished with his story.
Tomoyo went scarlet. She could feel her face suddenly growing warm. Well, what was she supposed to say to that? "Well, oh, goodness, I er, well… I… I hope he finds his way back…" she mumbled softy, not looking at any of her guests.
"You!" Kurogane said, practically shoving his finger against Fai's face. "You talk too much!"
"You've really hurt his feelings, you know." Fai went on, gently nudging Kurogane's finger away from his nose.
"Poor Kuro-minmin. Poor Kuro-minmin and his mean feelings!" Mokono chortled with glee.
"I'm so very sorry about that." Tomoyo said, swallowing hard before slowly turning her attention towards Kurogane, who suddenly stopped trying to squeeze in Mokona inside a small cup. "I'm… I'm sure, well, I think," Tomoyo frowned, trying to look deep into herself. Could she have done what Fai-san had told her? How could she? She looked into Kurogane's eyes and blushed. She wouldn't have done it out of whim, she was sure of it. "I… I mean, my other self is very regretful and… and… perhaps, maybe she did it for your own sake…" She trailed off, not sure where she had gotten that idea.
Kurogane straightened his back, crossed his arms defensively against his chest and looked away. "It doesn't matter." He said, his voice gruff and low. "I can still get home anyway, just as long as we have that freak." He said nodding towards Mokona who had managed to pull himself out of the cup.
"But…" Tomoyo began and was immediately silenced when Kurogane turned to look at her in the eyes. Everything about Kurogane seemed to be shrouded with mystery, as though his dark cloak was more than just as garment. It seemed more like a cover to his personality… the real Kurogane is underneath that cloak, Tomoyo thought, meeting his gaze.
"He has crazy notions about the soul and the heart and all that shit," Kurogane started and Tomoyo fought the urge to wince at his language. That was one thing she wasn't used to.
"But you're not the Princess," Kurogane continued, his voice suddenly calmer, almost kinder. "So there's no need to apologize and even if you are the Princess, there's still no need to apologize."
"Ok." Tomoyo murmured, forcing herself not to look away. Kurogane, like Touya-kun had that "Couldn't-Care-Less" attitude, but like Sakura's brother, Kurogane was always betrayed by his eyes. There was that gleam in them, that slanted look … that measured, calculating look… as though looking for some sign, something that she couldn't quite fathom. She wondered what it could be that Kurogane was looking for or in her.
"Do it again, Kuro-chi! Do it again!" Mokona squealed, flying past them.
Tomoyo blinked, shaking her head and suddenly finding herself being stared at, not by Kurogane, but by Fai, although with almost that same kind of look.
"Fai-san…" She began, unsure of what she was going to say and was thankfully interrupted, once again by Mokona.
"That was fun! That was fun!" Mokono continued, flying and bouncing and floating and jumping from one place to another. "Do it again, Kuro-chi! Do it again!"
Tomoyo could see Kurogane rolling his eyes and scowling darkly, as though contemplating on whether or not, this time, he was really going to shove Mokona all the way into the small cup, although how that could be possible, Tomoyo had no idea.
"But Kuro-nii is right!" Fai suddenly cried with a bit of dramatic flair that wasn't lost on Tomoyo. Kurogane, on the other hand, suddenly looked very bored and disinterested as though he had seen Fai and his affected behaviors one too many times.
"We really ought to find Syaoran and Sakura-chan soon." Fai said, suddenly turning serious.
It was like being in a crazy roller coaster ride, Tomoyo thought. So much… activity. So much action and energy around her. Oh, how she loved it! "I'll help you look for them!" Tomoyo volunteered, suddenly wanting to always be around them all the time: Childlike Mokona, loud and angry Kurogane, quiet and happy Fai-san. Oh, she was going to have an even better summer than Sakura-chan! And what an amazing film this experience would make! She better stack up on her video tapes!
"Really? Well, that's very kind of you." Fai-san said, interrupting her thoughts.
Tomoyo turned to face him, all smiles and eager to start looking for their Sakura and Syaoran. "It's alright. I am not very busy… and oh!" Tomoyo said, her eyes glittering with barely suppressed glee. Oh, why hadn't she thought about it! Oh, how wonderful! "You really can't walk around town wearing those." She said, fingering Fai-san's immaculate white robe. How soft! She must have this sort of material soon! Oh, the many clothes that she could make for Kurogane and Fai and even for Mokona!
"We were getting a lot of weird looks today." Fai agreed, looking down at his own clothes, completely missing the almost maniacal look of rapture in Tomoyo's face.
"That's because Mokona is so cute!" Mokona chirped in a sing-song voice. "Mokona so kawaii!"
"It's because you're a battery operated thing." Kurogane said, smirking.
"You don't even know what batteries are supposed to be, Kuro-chi." Fai pointed out, poking Kurogane's chest with his finger.
What a pair! Tomoyo thought. A bit like Touya and Yukito, she thought fondly, watching as Kurogane sputtered and choked. She noticed the faint blush rising in his cheeks and noted that he was extremely good looking, in a rough and dark way. She turned her head towards Fai and nodded appreciatively. Fai's really beautiful too – in a more delicate almost feminine sort of way. So tall and sleek and he'd look good in anything blue maybe even something paler than sky blue, Tomoyo thought, tilting her head. And as for Kurogane, well, black suited him fine, but perhaps he could pull off the color green – dark forest green, perhaps? She must look into that.
She clasped her hand and grinned, "I shall make you some new clothes to wear tomorrow!" She exclaimed.
"What's wrong with our clothes?" Kurogane asked, raising his eyebrows.
"Well, nothing of course, it's just that… it looks a little odd…for the season, I mean. It's summer and people are in their summer wear." Pictures of Kurogane, Fai and Mokona modeling the many summer attire flashed through Tomoyo's mind and she turned beet-red at an image of a shirtless Kurogane and Fai wearing board shorts. Oh, could she possibly drag them to look for Sakura and Syaoran at the beach? She must. She really must.
Oho-ho-ho-ho-ho. And she was going to make sure that she capture it all in film!
"Oh, that is just perfect Tomoyo-chan!" Fai said, smiling brightly, unaware of Tomoyo's plans for them. "But," he paused, as though suddenly remembering something, "isn't that a bit too much? You've already given us food and coffee."
"Please, just call me Tomoyo." She requested. "And, hotels can be very expensive. We have many extra rooms and you could all stay here until you could find your Syaoran and Sakura." She offered graciously.
"Their not ours," Kurogane said, scowling, "you make it sound like…"
"Like we're their parents?" Fai asked, teasing Kurogane. "I'd be the mother of course, I'm more nurturing and kind hearted after all."
"Kuro-pipi, mean father!" Mokona said, voicing out his opinion on Kurogane's parenting skills.
Kurogane swore underneath his breath, the vein in his forehead looking as though it would burst in a few more seconds. Mokona happily jumping up and down didn't seem to help matters.
"That's really very nice of you." Fai said, completely deaf to Kurogane's mad ranting. "Thank you so much for your help, but we don't want to be so troublesome."
"It's no trouble at all." Tomoyo assured them. And besides, she had never had so much fun in just one day and they were all just sitting here for tea! How exciting it would be once they start looking for Sakura and Syaoran. "I really do hope that we find Syaoran and Sakura soon." She said, suddenly remembering that more than anything it was important that they find their Sakura and Syoaran, that should come first.
For the first time, Mokona looked suddenly sad and worried. "I hope they're both ok."
Kurogane cleared his throat, "Hn. The brat better not get themselves into trouble." He said, which only made Mokona bawl even louder. Fai made wordless cooing sounds, trying to cheer up the distressed Mokona.
"I'm sure they're alright." Tomoyo said, "Your Syaoran and Sakura." She said brightly, handing them a plateful of sweets and pastries, little cakes the shape of hearts and wings, all in the shade of pink.
"Oh, food!" Mokona exclaimed, forgetting his tears.
"We'd start looking for them first thing in the morning." She assured them. "Don't worry. They'll take good care of each other."
"You're right." Fai said, accepting the plate and smiling serenely, "They always do."
----- -----
"Do you think they're alright?" Sakura whispered, her voice sounding almost too delicate, too soft for Syaoran to hear.
Night had fallen and outside the crickets and cicadas had started their singing. The day had ended, almost as abruptly as it had began, Syaoran thought. Time seemed to have passed a lot faster that usual, like the grains of sand falling quickly down an hour glass. All he could remember was that all afternoon, he and Sakura had sat together, talking and not talking at the same time. Sure, they had talked about the past worlds they've been too, laughing at the sillier, more innocent worlds and becoming suddenly silent as they remember the more dangerous ones, the sad worlds that they had stumbled upon. They seemed to be avoiding a certain topic, he didn't know what exactly.
Well, Syaoran thought frowning, he was trying not to talk about their past in particular. Somehow, during the course of their travels, Sakura figured out that he knew more about what had happened to her than Fai and Kurogane and that there was, between the three men, a secret that they shared. She had once insisted that he tell her what it was – the she must know too, so that she too could help. He had assured her that it was nothing that she should worry about at all. He had asked her that she trust him and always, when he pulled the Trust card, Sakura would back away.
Syaoran would feel guilty about it. It wasn't as though he was lying to her but not telling her was also almost like a lie. He hated it, deceiving her. Even if it was for her own good. How would she feel if he told her that her memories of him was to be the sacrifice?
She'd get mad. Syaoran knew this already. She'd ask him what right did he have to make the decision for her. But she was dying and there was nothing else that the witch would accept as a bargain. And more than being angry, she'd be sad for him. She'd be sorry for him and Syaoran would never ever let that happen. He'd rather die.
He hated this – this strained relationship they have. He hated it almost as much as he hated the winds that had taken her wings and scattered it so far away from her.
Even though Sakura seemed to have accepted his answer and his constant request for her to trust in him, she still tried once in a while to make him tell her more about her past. She never pushed him for any details, but he could see her green eyes turning darker whenever she asked about her world and why he knew so much about it.
He had been successful at avoiding the subject about the country of Clow, but as the days passed, as they found more of her feathers, Sakura started getting more and more curios, wanting and needing to know things.
"It feels like little holes, Syaoran-kun." She once told him tearfully and that just about completely shattered his soul. Sakura had never looked as lonely as she did that time and there was nothing else that he could do to take that loneliness away from her. Even if he had retrieved all of her memories, she will still feel those little holes and it would be because of him – the faceless boy in her memories.
His only reply had been a broken: "I'm sorry, Princess." For what else was he supposed to say to that?
Syaoran didn't know how long he could keep on giving vague answers. Being silent didn't work anymore as she tend to stare pleadingly at him that sometimes, he would relent and tell her some small detail ("The apples in Clow Country are colored gold, your highness." "Your brother, the King, doesn't like me very much, princess.") nothing really significant, but enough to satisfy her curiosity.
"Syaoran-kun, do you think they're alright?" Sakura repeated her question, this time more firmly, as though making sure that he heard her, like he did the first time.
The truth was, Syaoran could hear not just her voice, but even her heartbeat. Even if he was keeping his usual "safe" distance from her, he could always, always hear her heart beating and tonight, it was thumping really, really slowly.
They were lying on the floor of the temple. Sakura had used her robe as a pillow of some sort (she refused to take Syaoran's robe as well, insisting that he used it) and they were staring into the complete darkness that surrounded them. That he hadn't found any signs of Kurogane and Fai and Mokona was also another topic that he didn't wish to discuss, because Syaoran knew that Sakura was worrying about their friends.
It took him almost a full second to finally answer. This was one question that he was going to answer honestly and he didn't want to sound as though he was just trying to lessen her worrying. He knew that even if Fai and Kurogane and Mokona were right in front of them, heartily eating a sumptuous meal for 20 people, Sakura would still worry about them. She worried about everyone, completely forgetting about herself.
"I'm sure they are fine." Syaoran finally answered, sounding confident.
"I think they're arguing right now." Sakura said and Syoaran could hear her amused chuckle. Well, maybe she wasn't that worried about their friends, Syaoran thought, allowing the faintest smile to cross his lips. Sakura had seen Fai and Kurogane fight and perhaps she too knew what their friends were truly capable of.
"Fai-san and Kurogane-san, they argue a lot, don't they?" Sakura continued, her voice sounding slightly drowsy. "But I think they're real good friends." He heard her yawning, was aware that she was trying to hide it from him. "I wonder how's Mokona doing." Sakura was now half-mumbling the words. "I hope they're having fun while looking for us."
The tone in her voice changed and Syaoran immediately noticed the melancholic quality that had seeped in. Of course, she would miss Fai and Kurogane and Mokona, Syaoran thought, fighting down the urge to be slightly jealous.
"I'm sorry, I didn't find them." Syaoran mumbled again. "We'll look for them tomorrow." This was greeted by a second of silence and just when he was about to call out Sakura's name, thinking that she had fallen asleep, he sensed her movement. But in the dark, he hadn't anticipated her direction and the next thing he knew, she was looming over her, her green eyes bright and fierce.
"We?" There was a pleasant almost excited tone in Sakura's voice that made him want to reach up and tangle his hands in her hair, just to make sure he wasn't dreaming this. She leaned in further and her body brushed against him. Syaoran had to bite his lips to keep himself from gasping.
"Really, Syaoran-kun? You'd take me with you outside, tomorrow?"
"Yes." Syaoran said, finding his voice, wincing at how husky is sounded. He cleared his throat before continuing, "I'm sorry I left you all alone here." Syaoran apologized again. "But I thought that it would be safer if… if… and… and…"
He didn't get to finish his sentence. Sakura had thrown her arms around him, her weight settling oh-so wonderfully against him. Syaoran was too stunned to even yelp in surprise or die of heart attack.
Sakura pressed her face against his chest, the top of her head brushing against his chin. He could smell her hair – and it smelled something, something… really sweet – jasmine? and gut wrenchingly familiar.
Home.
Sakura smelled like home.
"I'm so glad Syaoran-kun!" Sakura said and then, her voice turning softer, she added, "It was so very lonely here while you were gone."
Slowly, carefully, as though he was afraid that she would suddenly turn into wings that would fly away and escape from him, he lifted his arms and wrapped it around her waist.
I don't want you to ever be lonely again, Sakura.
Syaoran could feel her breath against his skin, even with the clothes that he was wearing and for the first time since they had left Kingdom of Clow, he felt at home.
His arms tightened around her and without the usual knowing looks and glances that he could feel from Fai and Kurogane, Syaoran allowed himself to hold on to her – his princess, his most precious.
----- -----
TBC
Author's note: Well, yes, I know it's been taking me ages to update this fic and I really feel rotten about that. I hope that you all will forgive me. It hasn't been beta-ed yet, but as soon as I have the beta-ed chapter, I shall post it right away. I do promise to work harder so that I could update this fic more often. I hope that you all enjoyed this chapter. Many, many thanks for reading and please do let me know what you guys think. Need help badly. Hehehe.