Chapter 18

She was sitting in the chair, circles under her eyes when he woke the next morning. He sat up and looked for her next to him, then quickly around the room. He saw her there, sitting quietly, staring at her knees. "Aoi?"

"We'd better go." She stood. He noticed she was in her tank top and jeans. "You're returning my gifts, aren't you?"

"Yes." She knew her voice was barely more than a whisper.

"You're not going to stay with me, are you?" She could hear the disappointed tone he had, but knew what she had to do. "No."

"If it's because of last night, I'm sorry. I didn't want to do that."

"It's not just that. It was wrong, I knew it wasn't right. I was trying to see if you'd make me happy, and I know that you would, but I'd not be as happy as I could be." She stood, her head down.

Byakuya nodded. "I understand." He sighed and she turned, walking to the door.

They reached Urahara's shop that evening.

"Byakuya, Aoi, how was your evening?"

"It was fine. Where do you want the gigai?" Aoi's tone was nearly dangerous. She was eager to get back, and Urahara could sense the tension between them. "Aoi, could you help me in here for a moment, to prepare for them?" Aoi followed without a word.

"What happened? You look angry." Aoi looked at him. "It's nothing. I don't blame you for the other day. I knew he was watching. I just... I don't have the patience you two have."

Urahara nodded, pulling her in for a hug. "I understand. You're going back to Kira, aren't you?"

"I am."

"Does Byakuya know yet?" Aoi shook her head. Urahara nodded. "If he doesn't make you happy, I'm always here." He smiled at her and she looked up, dark circles under her eyes, a darkness about her that showed her discontent. She didn't smile. She didn't have a twinkle in her eyes.

"I'm hoping we didn't screw you up too much. You look so..."

"I know. I made a trip last night."

"I know." Urahara nodded and Aoi looked at him. "How?"

"A Senkai gate opened last night at the hotel. I keep track of them all, especially if you're here." Aoi nodded. "If you don't mind, I'm a bit rushed right now. I need to go back."

They walked out, opening the Senkai gate right outside the shop's door. Aoi turned to Urahara and waved, with never a smile reaching her lip.

They reached the city and Aoi looked over, seeing Yamamoto before her with Kira and Renji by his side. She noticed the fearful look on Kira's face, but didn't really face him. He looked worried. She walked up to Yamamoto and knelt to one knee, her head on the other, her hands on the ground beside her foot.

"Yamamoto-Taicho, Please do as we spoke earlier."

"Are you sure, Aoi? I know this has been hard on you, but there's time to reconsider. You can take back what you had and I wouldn't complain."

"It wouldn't be fair." She spoke, her voice at a whisper.

"Alright, then. Aoi, I hereby arrest you for leaving your mission. You returned to Seireitei during your mission without consent from your Taicho. You will be going into the prison hall until I decide your punishment." She stood, her hands out and Yamamoto looked over at Renji. "Abarai-kun, if you would..."

Renji stepped forwards fearfully, looking over at Byakuya who just stood, his hands clenched. "Aoi, I'm sorry."

"I know." Her voice wasn't as cold as it was empty, but both could be sensed. Yamamoto didn't look happy about it either.

Aoi was halfway to the prison corridor when Renji stopped and turned to her. "Why are you getting yourself arrested? I thought you were so set on being the Taicho of the third squad again! It doesn't make sense."

"The punishment was my idea. The arrest was my idea. I've throughly read the laws of Seireitei and know what I'm doing. If your worried about Byakuya's response to my arrest, I think you have little to worry about. He already knows I can't be with him." Her eyes didn't meet his and he sighed. "He really cared about you."

"I know." He looked at her incredulously. "Then why are you doing this?!"

"Because it's who I am. I am the person who will get themselves arrested for an hour to get a major thing done. I have no qualms with this, why do you?!"

Renji looked at her for a moment, shaking his head. "I don't even know. It's just like I have to protect you." She looked over at him and for the first time that day smiled. "Thank you. Even though it's not for Byakuya-sama, you're still worried about me. It's kind of nice."

They were halfway to the prison when she spoke again. "You remind me of someone." He turned to her, his eyes lazy. "Really?"

"I had a brother once. My parents had me as the second child. My older brother was always watching out for me, even when my parents weren't." Renji nodded. "I was always an orphan. My first memories were with Rukia and the group we grew up with. I knew I met her when I was a child, but I don't really remember much before that." She nodded.

"You still remind me of him. Your voice, your mannerisms all seem familiar because of him."

"I'm not your brother." He sighed and she nodded. "I know." He turned to her, still walking. "But I remind you this much of him?"

She turned and nodded, a little light creeping back into her eyes. Renji nodded.

She sat in the chair just as Yamamoto walked in. "I hope your stay hasn't been too uncomfortable."

"I just got here." She turned to him, still smiling from the chat with Renji. Yamamoto sighed. "It was really hurting you, being near him, wasn't it?" Aoi nodded. "He really cares about me, and I can't feel like that for him. I tried to make myself, but it didn't work out." She looked down, feeling guilty for what they were about to do.

"Aoi, are you sure you wouldn't rather regain your Taicho status now? I really wouldn't have a problem with it."

"Byakuya-sama has taught me one very important thing. There's so many parts of being a Taicho I had no idea about. I'd like to have my chance to learn before I screw up a whole squad." Yamamoto nodded. "And the time limit is for..."

"Just to make sure. It'll take me a while anyway, to think like that again. Between Byakuya-sama and Urahara-san, things just got way too weird for me." He looked at her, confused. "Urahara-san?"

It was an hour later that she walked up. The room was being cleared and Renji looked at her with wide eyes. "You, You did this, didn't you?"

"I did." She looked at him, his eyes wide, hers were starting to regain the sparkle they'd had before. "Good luck. I really do wish you the best." She nodded. "I know. Thank you for everything, Renji. If it hadn't been for you I wouldn't be able to do this now." He shook his head as he left the room, the last of his belongings in tow.

Aoi smiled, it felt like home. She was home.

She turned to Yamamoto and bowed low. "Yamamoto-Taicho, thank you for everything. I know I've driven you all insane, and I apologize, but I'll need to make one other a little crazy for a bit." He nodded. "I know. Just leave me with a Taicho, alright?"

She smiled up at him.

It was only a few hours till she was there, her belongings unpacked. She sat low as the sky started to dim and turned the lights off, watching through the front window, making sure she wasn't seen.

It wasn't long till he arrived. She laid down and went to sleep shortly after. He'd be awake for at least another two hours. It was all going so perfectly.

She woke the next morning and made muffins. She was nervous and it seemed the thing to do. She knew he'd have trouble sleeping knowing she'd been arrested, and with the look she'd had the day before she knew he'd worry so much more.

She walked into the office and started the paperwork.

It was nearly an hour later that he walked through the door. "Renji, I-"

He stopped, staring at her. "Aoi?"

"Hai, Taicho?" She smiled, finishing off the last sheet. "What are you doing here?"

"Finishing the papers. Would you like a muffin? They're banana." She said it all so nonchalantly that it caught him off guard. "Where's Renji?"

"Probably at his squad's office. I don't know." She looked up at him and he realized what was happening. "Aoi?"

His hands shook, more in fear than anything else. "I'm your Fukutaicho for a while. Is that alright?" She looked at him, suddenly worried he'd say no. He just stood there, taking this all in.

"I'm sorry. I guess we should have told you. After my arrest yesterday I was released on two conditions. First, that I don't remain in Byakuya's squad, as I'm so much trouble there. Second, that I try my best to learn to be a Taicho so that I can take over again, but no earlier than five years." She smiled at him and he nodded. "So you're really back."

"I'm really back." She smiled, standing and took the paperwork. "If you don't mind, I have assignments to pass out." Kira nodded, stepping aside to let her through.

Kira was surprised at how hard she was working. She'd set weekly exercises for the squad, as well as random other things that Kira hadn't had the time to work on. By the end of the day all of the work was done, the office had been organized and Aoi was exhausted.

He'd watched her all day. She knew he was waiting for her to say something. He wanted her to take him back, but after what she'd done to him he wouldn't be surprised if she said no.

At the end of the day she just disappeared into her room. He watched as she went and sighed. He went into his room and tried to relax. After an hour he gave up on sleep and decided maybe a bath would help.

After an hour he laid down, closing his eyes, but still he couldn't sleep.

There was a sudden weight beside him and he looked over, seeing Aoi sitting on the futon beside him. He jerked up, suddenly everything just caught in his throat.

"You told me once that if I was having trouble you'd let me stay with you and you'd comfort me. I'm calling you on it." He nodded, laying down. She curled up beside him and he just looked at her, the deep cerulean eyes that just looked back at him. "Why are you here?"

"Do you want me to leave?" Kira frowned. "I don't, but you're with him now, right?" She knew he was talking about Byakuya. She smiled at him and sat back up.

"Izuru, can I tell you something?" He nodded, watching her. "You told me to date other people. I did. I tried... It didn't work out so well. I started drinking way too much and ended out in Unohana's care. I couldn't stand it. Everything was wrong and I couldn't keep seeing him. After all, Izuru, he wasn't you." Her eyes finally really reached his and her words sunk in. "I technically dated two. You told me that you'd take me back if I could tell you why I wanted to be with you instead of them."

"With the smallest little thing you can always make me smile. When I wanted so badly to be happy all I could think about was you. I knew they would be able to make me happy, but with you I'm more. I don't want to just be happy, I want to be able to be myself. " Tears started to seep into the corners of her eyes.

"I'm sorry if I can't give you a specific answer, I'm only me, and you were the one who accepted me before I opened up. You cared about me for being who I am, not what I could be, not for a cheap fling, but for me, so please, Please take me back!" She sobbed and Kira watched her for a moment.

"Aoi, I've done everything in my power not to go see you, to give you the freedom to make your own decisions. The office was destroyed because I couldn't even pay attention to work. I thought you'd chosen Byakuya, that what I'd done was too cruel and you'd turned away from me."

"It hurt. It hurt every day to think that you wouldn't even talk to me. I wanted so badly to hear your voice. Izuru, please? Please..."

He wrapped his arms around her, catching her off guard. She sat there for a second, registering what was happening. She threw her arms around him, for the first time in what seemed like forever, around the right one.

She knew that he'd never let go of her again. She ran her fingers across his back, pulling him as tightly to her as possible. "Don't ever do that to me again!" She sobbed and he looked down at her laughing. "Never! I promise! I'll never let you go again!" His smile was everything to her. She reached up quickly and kissed him, wanting to keep a part of that smile to herself. His hands cradled around her and she just sat there for a while, her lips pressed lightly to his.

He pulled back after a while. "You've had a bit of practice." She beamed as she looked up at him, her eyes still had tears, down to her chin from crying. He reached up and wiped the tears away, noticing her pushing into his hand. Her hands lost their grip on his upper back and slowly slid down.

"Aoi, After this, I don't have the willpower. Please be careful of your hands. She smiled at him and slowly shook her head. He looked at her surprised for a moment before her hands slid down his sides. He hissed as he leaned back, his back arching at the touch.

"I'm not joking. I don't have it tonight." She sat up and moved forwards, sitting in his crossed legs, wrapping hers around him. She reached up, cupping her hands at his cheeks. "I know."

She reached up again, kissing him a little harder than before as her hands again slid down his sides, this time they scratched across his stomach.

He took the sensation well. His cheeks began to blush, and with her position she could tell he was enjoying himself. She reached down, kissing at his neck, enjoying it when his hands dug into her back. "Aoi..." He sighed and she felt her head swim.

His hands started to travel down her, sending chills up her spine. She felt it when his hands made their way to the haori straps, untying them carefully. He reached up to her shoulders and slid the cloth from her, tearing away his own haori. He pulled her in close again after, the feeling of her skin against his was so amazing.

She loved the sensations he gave her. His hands explored her softly, across her sides, eliciting a light moan into his neck, giving him more of a fire. He made his way to her chest, causing her to toss her head back. He leaned forwards, laying her down on the futon. He reached down and untied her hakama before sitting back, pulling the cloth from her. She looked up at him, his haori still tucked into the back of the hakama he wore.

"You're so beautiful..." His voice wavered and she reached up, wrapping her arms around him. He felt her wrap around him, her arms around his neck, her legs trapping his as they wrapped around his knees. Her lips pressed against his again, and as her hands ran through his hair he sighed softly, granting her access.

Her tongue swept over his, tasting him and she could feel his heart pounding against her chest. Her hands slid down, feeling the strength in his chest, pulling the tie of the hakama and releasing it. He gasped and looked down, looking up at her surprised.

She pushed him up, then over onto his back. She pulled the cloth from him and looked him over.

She was surprised at his build. She always figured he'd be really thin, but the uniform hid his strong shape. She inched up beside him, running her arm across him and she looked up, noticing the gasp as her hand ran just below his waist. She laid down beside him, again running her hand down his side, from his chest to his waist. Their lips met again and she ended out laying down, Kira above her, his face lowered, burrowing into her shoulder. "Aoi, I have to warn you, this is the last time I can. Are you sure you're ready? I don't want you to think we need to do this now. I can wait..."

"Izuru, I'm ready. I've been waiting, but only for you." She smiled at him and he nodded. He laid down beside her, throwing her off guard. His hand reached around her throat and trailed down, surprising her. She whimpered as his hand crossed her chest, rubbing past the sensitive pink skin there, and trailed down. As his hand reached her stomach she felt sudden butterflies, the hole in her seeming to come out again. His hand ran across her and he leaned down, his mouth on her chest as he moved his legs between hers. She looked down, surprised as his kisses fluttered across her, making her skin tingle. He kept lowering slowly, kissing down her every inch or so. She kept making odd sounds, she wanted to stop, but every few kisses caught a sensitive spot and she would make another squeak.

Her stomach was turning. She was nervous and scared, she'd never done this before willingly. The one time it had happened it had been so long ago.

She sighed softly as his hands reached around her hips. His mouth went to work on the most sensitive area of her and she pressed her head back into the pillow, her hands wildly flying out and gripped onto the futon. Her back arched as she stifled a yell. Her lungs didn't seem to want to work, she was breathing so hard that she was completely caught off guard when he stopped for a second. "You make such a sound..." She looked down, surprised, her cheeks red as roses.

She felt a tightening in her, it was barely noticeable with Byakuya or Urahara, but it was strong now. Like all of her life was winding around her naval, waiting for her to release it. Her eyes clenched and she felt her self start to shake, her back arching against her will.

The world seemed to sparkle. She felt herself slowly gain in anticipation till she fell over. "Izuru!" She called as she clenched up, feeling the release from within her wave through her. He slowly moved back up her, his fingers now teasing her entrance and she gasped, laying back.

The look in his eyes was so soft, but so lusting and she was surprised to see such a want on him. She smiled at him as he leaned above her. He moved slowly, as not to rush too fast and slowly moved himself against her, now teasing himself as much as her. He leaned down, whispering into her ear. "Aoi,"

"Izuru I love you! I always have, I always will!" He sat up, looking at her surprised. She'd never said it.

"I love you, Aoi. You mean everything to me." With that he slid himself into her.

She clenched around him the feeling at first amazing, but it quickly turned painful. Izuru stopped and looked down at her, eyes wide. "Aoi, I didn't think you would... Are you alright?!"

"Please, Don't stop?" The passion and desire in her voice almost surprised her. She looked up at him and he looked at her, pressing his lips to hers.

It was only a second before the pain was gone, the feeling within her was so much more than she'd imagined it would be. He was slow and patient, not the frenzied passion she'd imagined, but the feeling of him against her, the feeling of him within her was more than she could bear. It was only a moment into this that she felt herself losing over again.

"Izuru..." Her voice was breathy as she he pressed his lips against the crease between her neck and her shoulder. "Izuru, I'm... I'm..." He lightly bit her, causing her to start again. She felt him start losing his softness, gaining speed, his hot breath against her neck.

He slowly kept gaining speed and strength as he slowly lost his soft side.

Aoi felt him grip onto her, his fingers digging into her shoulders trying to keep her as close as possible. "Aoi, I can't... I'm about..."

"Go ahead!" Her breathing was so pressurized, she tried to keep from screaming out the words. He moved so he could see her and looked at her as she bit her lip, close again. He leaned down and kissed her, speeding up for a moment. She felt his breath catch in his throat, his head again slipped down to her shoulder. She felt herself flood with the relaxing waves again, but this time it was stronger. All of her muscles seemed to release at once, as did his, and she felt him tighten within her, yelling her name into her shoulder. It was a moment later she realized she was doing the same.

They laid there for a moment, completely overtaken by the sudden relaxing feeling before he turned, her beside him. "You're staying here tonight, right?"

She looked up with a smile, kissing him softly. "I wouldn't be anywhere else." She laid her head on his shoulder, quickly falling asleep.