A/N: A summary of Katara's thoughts in "The Awakening" through "The Runaway."

Chapter 6: Besieged By the Burden

The weeks during Aang's recovery were the longest weeks of my life. I took care of Aang all the time, while Sokka and Dad—who we met up with in a nearby bay—made plans for an attack on the Fire Nation. Sokka's brilliance of mind came to light as he invented the invasion strategy. I didn't talk to Dad much. In fact, I was rude to him often. I felt very bitter toward him—earlier, that's why I let Sokka go visit Dad while I stayed in Ba Sing Sey.

When Aang awoke we explained everything to him. He picked up on my negative feeling for Dad and asked about it—but I denied it. Aang felt extremely guilty for letting the world down, and although I told him not to worry about it, he said he wanted to redeem himself. So, when I wasn't there, Aang snuck out. I remember coming into his room and seeing that he was not there. At once I knew what happened, and dropped the tray of food I had been carrying. The dishes cracked into brittle pieces. My heart would do the same if, indeed, Aang had left me.

I ran outside and found Dad. Bato respectfully left, and I tearfully told Dad that Aang was gone. "He left!" I explained, unsuccessfully trying to hold back my emotions.

"Maybe that's his way of being brave," said my father in a soft tone.

"It's not brave!" I sobbed. "It's selfish and stupid! I know the world needs him, but doesn't he know that we need him too?!"

Hakota suddenly looked at me very hard. "You're—talking about me too, aren't you?"

The weight was too much now—I let it totter on the edge, unable to hold it up with my usual composure. I was crying so hard my face was soaked. I had to tell somebody what was going on in my heart. I had to.

"How could you leave us, Dad?" I cried. "I know we had Grangran and you had to go…but we were just so lost without you. I understand why you left—I really do—so why do I still feel this way? I'm so sad and angry and hurt!"

Dad put his arms around me comfortingly. I buried my face in his chest, sobbing like a baby. Hakota could not tell me the answer to my problem. Perhaps if he had known me better, he would have been able to tell me. But all he could do at that point was tell me how much he loved me. I know why I felt so hurt—everyone abandoned me and I had yto take care of whatever was left. I had to be the savior. And Dad didn't know me; he was never around and he couldn't help me. That's why I felt so lost!

When I calmed down, I struggled to pick up my burden again. "We have to follow Aang!" I exclaimed.

"Katara, you should get some rest," Hakota told me gently. "I'll handle this."

Feeling relieved, I went to bed. For once, I let Dad and Sokka handle everything. For one night, I was free of my painstaking insanity. I slept better than I had slept in years. As soon as it was dawn, we made it to the little island where Aang was lying. Still emotionally fragile from last night's venting, I cried as I hugged Aang. We were together again.

After Aang's awakening, Dad went to gather some warriors to help us with the invasion. I didn't like it how he left again. I knew I would need his input during the upcoming weeks of hiding in the Fire Nation. We made our way to a forsaken bay surrounded by cliffs. When we got there, we would wait for the invasion force to meet us. In the meantime we stole disguises.

I really wasn't interested in the moral complications of stealing, but I was worried about us getting caught. However, we managed to steal things quickly and quietly. Sokka examined all the possibilities before taking clothes—we couldn't buy anything without getting attacked, and even if we could no one would accept our foreign money. We had to steal clothes or get caught by authorities, and if we were caught they had a good chance of beating us now that Aang's Avatar State was inaccessible.

We had quite a few adventures on our way to the bay. I was quiet and thoughtful for the first few days, trying to decide what was wrong with me. When we made it to the village of the Painted Lady, I took up my burden again. These people needed my help, so I helped heal them and did everything I could. I was stressed, but with that stress came the comfortable sense of control that rescuing always gave me.

Of course, I had to trick Aang and the others into thinking that Appa was sick so I could stay in the village longer. Aang would not be angry at me—he never is. Toph didn't say much when she found out about my deceit, but Sokka would not shut up. Once again, he was disgusted by my dishonesty and told me that getting to the bay was more important than helping this village. By his way of thinking, the invasion is closer to the ultimate goal of defeating the Fire Nation, and we couldn't afford to stop and help every village.

But my way of thinking was quite different than his. I furiously told him to shut up. Then I shouted,

"I will never turn my back on people who need me!!!"

Sokka held an opposing opinion to the very end, but as usual, Aang let me have my way. I delightedly planned to destroy the nearby factory that polluted this village's river and way of life.

Then our group went on to a bigger city. We would stay there for several days, buying supplies and getting everything we needed for the invasion. It was at this city where Toph started to really act out. She started gambling and pulling scams that were extremely dangerous. Aang joined her and I grew furious at them both. Sokka at first had nothing to do with the scams, but as more were pulled off, Toph lured him with all the money she had been getting. She gave Sokka all the money he needed to buy maps and weapons and even a pet hawk. I guess even Sokka has weak points.

Toph and I had been at odds lately more than ever. We often argued and even fought while trying to teach Aang the elements. Toph may be blind, but she has no trouble seeing right through to me. Out loud, so that everyone could hear, she announced that I was a motherly control freak who didn't know how to stop herself. I retorted and said that Toph was a rebellious runaway who felt guilty for leaving her parents.

Everyone knew my problem now. Word was out on me. Not that it hadn't been before, as I discovered while bathing in a nearby lake. Above me, Sokka and Toph were talking about me. Sokka said that he had always known my problem of playing everyone's mother. For some reason, it made me feel bad that they knew so much about me. They might lose their respect for me now.

For that reason, I decided to convince the others that I wasn't too motherly. To gain their acceptance again, I pulled a risky scam. However, I got in serious trouble for it since there was an Avatar hunter out to get us. Sokka named him "combustion man." We all managed to escape, but only thanks to me and my water bending. I also helped Toph write a letter to her parents, because she did miss them after all. I used Sokka's pet Hawk to deliver the message.

I left the city with a sense of accomplishment. I may have tottered on the edge with my emotional burden before, but now I had it harnessed. Someone who knew me well might have noticed that with my new sense of composure, I actually became even more stubborn and unlikable than before.