Ok I know, I'm so sorry about the time it took me to update this.
I give no excuses – my brain died on me for this chapter – end of.
its not as long as the last chappy either but things are getting interesting.
Closer – Part 5
EPOV
I turned my back as she changed. She agreed to come with me. It placed fear in me that she was so trusting to me when I had only been aggressive towards her, that night in the alley and even today at school I was cold towards her. Yet here she trusted me when her every instinct should have been telling her to get away.
I wish she had called for Charlie now, to scare me off by needing to hide my true existence, my family's existence. I don't even know if this is the right thing to do. Expose her to my world. If we leave here tonight she will find out. Trust is not an issue. Looking into her chocolate eyes, her honesty shines through and that she won't say anything. I trust her with my life. Unfortunately she trusts me with hers too.
The burn in my throat swells with the smell of her. This is so wrong. The words echo around my head. Looking out the window I try to distract myself from her movements. Her heart rate increased rapidly as she took my hand and it hasn't calmed much since. Her blood pulsates around her body at rapid speed. Her human heart almost seems infallible as it pumps but I know better of her true fragility.
"I'm ready." She whispers behind me.
I turn around to meet her eyes as she nervously tucks a piece of hair behind her hair as she looks down to the floor with a red glow forming at her cheeks. Definitely human.
She moves closer as I pause, relishing her blush. She is the epitome of beauty. A nervous smile adds to her features as she notices me looking at her. She must see through my stony features.
At her slight discomfort I move my hand out once again to take hers leading her to the window.
"Out the window?" she looks nervous once again but I think it's more with fear that she will fall than anything else.
"How did you think I got in?" I give her a small smile gently teasing her.
"Yeh I know…It's just…this is me." Then holding up her bandaged arm to my view. "And this is me." She bites down on her lip, her face a puzzle of how she can get down without ending up in hospital again. I can't read her mind but this one is easy. I let a small laugh rumble in the back of my throat.
"This is funny?" she asks flatly raising an eyebrow.
"I won't let anything happen to you, I promise." My eyes look deep into hers and see she is drawn into me once again with my words. I dazzle her and wonder if this is her reaction to me or the beast.
She nods before I turn towards the window opening it as wide as possible in aid to help Bella through. I climb through first backing down on to the end of the large branch stabilizing myself with the branch above calling her forward with my free hand.
"I can't." she calls.
"I'm right here Bella, trust me on this one." You can see the indecision in her eyes as she looks down to the ground. "You will be fine, I'll be holding on to you." I promise.
She closes her eyes before taking in a deep breath and exhaling. Slowly she begins to pass through the window and a small cringe in her face shows when she places to much weigh on her wrist. Oh fragility. I capture her by her waist and pull her towards my body before she realizes.
Her back against my chest I pull her in closer, inhaling her. "How is that wrist?"
"Fine." She breathed out from my grip.
I turned her slowly so she faces me, still close, standing chest to chest, nose to nose. Our lips could meet with the slightest of movement but I refrain.
I wrapped her good arm around my neck and pulled her body flush against my chest wrapping one of her legs around me, the other instinctively wrapping around the other side of me locking her against me. I try to ignore her warmth against my cold even when a small shiver comes from her, jolting electricity through my body in pleasure.
I quickly climb down the tree as she stays locked to me looking into my eyes in amazement of the speed and ease I used to get down from the tree. A moment passed as we eye each other from our embrace, her look unknowing of what to expect from me. She knows my strength and speed but taken out of the intensity of the alley and I have became superman. Her human brown orbs looked at me intently waiting for me to some how explain myself or something. I smiled at her feeling somewhat nervous. "Your light as a feather." I shrugged, and honestly, to me, she was.
Her gaze broke as reality came back to the forefront of her mind, breaking her self away from me. "Your really cold." She commented to me as I tried to ignore it. "Are you feeling alright, you should be warmer." worry creased her brow as she took hold of my hand in hers in an attempt to warm it.
A tiny laugh came from my mouth at realizing that this had been the warmest I had felt in decades. Not warmth gauged by temperature but warmth from her very presence. Her slender fingers wrapping around my hands in her bid to give me heat, I leaned into her ear trying to keep our voices down from open windows "I'm not going to heat up." I told her gently as she looked at my hands with concentration trying to create heat but only chilling her.
Her look at me was questioning, it was the look she gave me moments before as I helped her down from the tree but only growing stronger with her curiosity. With no words I pulled her up in my arms, my arm curved behind her knees and pulling her top half into my chest, "Hold on." I snickered before I raced off with the rest of the world blurring as we passed.
BPOV
Placing my hands on my knees I bent forward holding myself up. What was that? Not only had I been baffled by his movements, I was struggling to hold onto my dinner. I took a deep breath in and exhaled with my eyes closed; opening them his golden eyes looked back at me. "I'm fine, just a bit motion sick." I said as I struggled to stand, his cold arms holding me up – yes, cold? How was he so cold? His hands could give me shivers in more ways than one. In the alleyway that night I never noticed, cold hands weren't to far out of place on people hanging around alleyways at night, his cold hands never startled me earlier either when I took hold of his had, he had obviously been outside for some time before he got into my room. His hands should have warmed up in my room, least a closer temperature to mine, instead it was like ice.
Looking at his golden eyes my gaze moved down towards his chest and arms, the strong muscles that held me so tightly and easily into safety from the tree and speeding to where ever we were now. Looking around I struggled to look in the dark. The only light to shine was from the almost full moon sitting high in the clear sky. It was peaceful here; it felt like another home, that I could quite happily snuggle into the thick grass and sleep. The darkness and the moonlight almost seemed to warm the thick bush in the still of the night.
"I found this the other day, I needed to get away from the others and let my own mind decided if coming back to you was the right thing." His voice was almost a whisper as he looked out onto the meadow.
"I think it's nice." I tell him honestly. "I wish I could have somewhere like this to think."
Silence
We stood there for a few moments before I decided to speak again. "Do you think coming back to me was the right thing?"
His feet scuffed the ground at some invisible stone with his eyes down at his feet. "I don't know." His breath pauses for a moment before he looks back up at me. "What I mean, I… It's like…" he sighs, his eloquent mind seeming to give up on him for his words of choice. "What do you remember about that night Bella?"
"The alleyway? Everything. I can't seem to forget it." I really can't it's been months but every moment I can still picture. "You kissing me, telling me you think I have your soul." He looks at me a small smile, clearly he remembers it too. "Do you really think that Edward?"
"More so right now than that night." He walks a couple of steps forward, his back to me as he looks up at the sky, he seems peaceful here. This is not the same Edward from earlier.
"I know what you mean." I move forward the couple of steps as I place my hand on his shoulder willing him to face me.
He spins around meeting my gaze as he pulls back, "You need to know who I am first Bella." His soft tone had turned serious.
"I know who you are, your Edward Cullen." I give him a teasing smile trying to ease the tension that he can seem to build so easily when talking about himself.
"You know my name. Bella if you want to know the real me I have to tell you about the monster."
"Monster?" I try not to laugh. "Is this about how strong you are and how fast?" I ask.
"Yes and other things. I'm not like you, you have seen me, you remember what I told you about me in the alley. Now you need to think about what I truly am."
"You're a seventeen year old boy. You're not a monster."
"Don't be so naive Bella. You know I'm not the same as you." He rushes to one of the trees and pushes it over onto its side with out trying, the tree must have been about a hundred years old, the trunk thick and sturdy, rooted into the ground, now just on its side, the roots lifted out slightly before it became to much and snapped. He picked at one of its branches and threw it into the distance over my head.
My eyes snap forward in amazement at him as I hear the tree land somewhere before his figure disappears out of sight to behind me as he leans in. "Still don't think I'm a monster?" his voice snarls at me almost viciously.
"What are you doing?" I turn round to face him "you think that throwing a tree about is going to make me run away?" I snap back at him and his tone.
"Are you scared yet?" he avoids my questions.
"No Edward why would I be? I don't know what you are but I know who you are and that's all that matters to me."
"I'm a murderer." He roars at me and I cringe back slightly at his anger.
"I don't know what you have done Edward but you are not a murderer." I try to keep my voice calm and the tremble out of it.
He pushes me back up against a tree. "The night I met you I wanted your blood, I craved it, I still do." his head moves down to the crook of my neck as I feel his lips flutter across my neck, making me almost ask him to continue. "I left you and looked for human blood to satisfy me, looking for blood sweeter than yours. I killed nine women in vain, in the search for something sweeter than you, than your blood. I drank all there blood trying to fill your void."
"It's my fault there dead?" I asked surprised. "If you had of stayed would they still be alive?"
He pauses for a moment thinking about my questions this time "It's not your fault there dead Bella but yes they would still be alive, but you perhaps wouldn't be." His tone aching for something lost.
I felt some fear at his admission but I still longed to touch him to feel his cold exterior in the heated discussion. "How did you kill them? How did you drink there blood?" I asked not really knowing if I wanted the answer.
His eyes closed and his body froze, the top of his lip curled up with anger pouring out of him. Who was he angry with me or himself?
"I drank there blood from there neck, I bit into to there artery's here." His could fingers traced along my neck where only moments earlier his lips had brushed along, not kissing but refraining.
"What are you?" I ask taking his cold fingers from my neck into my warmer hand.
"You must know what I am. You need to say it, Bella." His voice was almost pleading with me.
My mind raced, I knew what he was but could I say it. Could I really believe he was one? It was stories, legends too but aren't they just the same?
"Tell me Bella, tell me what I am." His voice was demanding an answer.
The word stuck in my mind
Vampire
"Bella."
"Vampire." I called back to him; his face froze with a locked jaw as he looked down at me. I worried now that I might have been wrong.
"Now are you scared?" He asked his voice eerily calm.
"Not of you Edward,I don't like the things you have done but I'm not scared. You won't hurt me. I trust you." I went to place my hand on his face but found the space vacant as he disappeared into the trees.
Looking around I was alone in he dark meadow. I turned around looking to see where he went. Moving forward I headed for the trees in hope of finding him hidden in the bush. "Edward." I called his name several times and shivered at the fear of being left alone in this darkness. The meadow suddenly felt scary with out the presence of Edward next to me.
"Edward." I called again as I climbed a steep slope of dirt. Reaching out I grabbed hold of the tree branch in front to steady myself but accidentally reaching with my bandaged wrist. I let a moan out at the pain it caused and automatically letting it go and falling backwards down the steep slope. Before I realized it I was caught, unhurt in Edwards arms.
"Will you watch where you go." He scolded me as he placed me back on the safety of the level grass at the bottom of the slope.
"Sorry, I thought you had left me." I could feel my eyes swell with unshed tears at the thought of his tone with me and him leaving me.
"I will never leave you, not if you don't want me to." His chilled hand swept across my face and brushed my hair back into place as his voice soothed.
"I don't want you to leave me again, Promise." I begged.
"After so long without you, I don't think I could spend another moment without you." I leaned in closer to him, praying for him to kiss me. Instead all I got was his forehead touching mine. I would take it.
I waited a few moments, enjoying the feeling of his eyes openly searching mine as I did the same to him looking into the depths of each others souls. He had one even if he didn't believe it. He had something. I could see it. "Why didn't you kill me?" I asked, wondering if my blood had been so hard to resist, why did he?
"Because if I killed you I think there would be nothing left to keep me in this world. I travelled alone for decades and there was nothing but after seeing you, you gave me something, reason for being. I needed you. Without you my life would be worse than before. Having something, even if I never truly had you or seen you again, knowing I had killed you would have been a fate worse than death for me, worse than what my fate already is."
"But you're a vampire, you will kill again right?" I asked confused trying not to anger him.
"I travelled alone but I do have a family, and I'm reunited with them. My family are vegetarians, they live off of the blood of animals, and they don't want to be monsters either. I left them because I let the beast take control; I took the easy option pretending to myself that it was justified. But I stopped after the nine women; they were the last humans I will ever kill. My family helped me when I asked for it and they even moved here with me to let me find you" His look was sad he sounded almost disgusted with himself.
"Why now, why didn't you come back then?" I felt annoyed that he changed all that time ago and he could have been here with me.
"Because you don't know the pain I am in with the smell of your blood, how much my mind is fighting with its self to have it and to have you. It consumes me but I keep fighting it because I need you. If I came here when I was trying to change I don't think I would have been able to stop my self." His voice went quite and his head dropped, breaking his look with me.
I lifted his chin to bring his eyes to mine once again. "We'll I'm still alive aren't I? You must be doing something right." I smiled softly at him as he mirrored my smile
"Don't be foolish Bella; you are still in great danger being around me. If you were sane you would stay away."
"I don't want to be, not if it means I don't have you with me."
*****
EPOV
"Next time can you just drive?" She joked, I hoped, as she tried to stand up straight once again. If I could carry her constantly I would but I had a feeling that she would only tell me off if I tried.
I let a small laugh come out as I took in her expression as she looked up at my house. She had looked down at herself blushing when I asked her if she would meet the rest of my family, to help her understand better. She pulled at the material of her sweat pants and hooded top feeling embarrassed that she wasn't 'dressed properly'. She would always look beautiful in absolutely anything. My telling her so didn't make her believe me though. She only continued to blush more. Her sweet crimson cheeks still shone as her eyes took in my home.
"What if they don't like me?" she asked looking u to me. "What if they tell you, you can do better?"
"Bella, love, they will adore you." Her eyes once again scanned her clothes as she frowned. "You might want to be careful doing that in there, Alice will only be happy to dress you up like doll." I let out a small laugh again as her features cringed. It would be a worse look if she knew exactly the clothes she would be trying to put on her.
"Why aren't they in bed and how come your allowed out the house at this time, Charlie would have me dead." She rambled still confused.
"Like I said Bella, they will help you understand. And we don't actually sleep." I smiled at her knitted brows as I took her hand and led her in through the front door.
Walking in we were immediately greeted by Alice. "You know she does have her own mind Edward, it's up to her if she wants to change her clothes." of courses Alice had been listening, ever since her vision of her and Bella becoming friends months ago she has been eager for any contact with her.
"Alice, clam down, sit down and be quiet, please." Her little pixie features change from surprise to anger at my words. Bella stood there dumbfounded at the exchange, most likely at Alice hearing our conversation outside.
"Bella, this is Alice, she's easily excited." I smile at Bell as I raise a knowing eyebrow.
She nods and holds out her hand to shake but Alice is quicker and rushes in to hug her. I feel somewhat jealous at my sister having closer contact with Bella than I. "Like I said, easily excited." I smile at Bella's surprised face.
I pull her in by the hand further into the room as the rest stand around, Esme keen and walking forward greeting Bella with a warm smile. "Bella, it's so nice to finally meet you." There, how was that too hard for Alice?
"Bella this is my mother, Esme."
"You don't look old enough to have a son." Bella tells her as I cringe internally at Bella's innocent words.
"Were not related, we have just come together, Carlisle created myself, Esme, Rosalie" I indicate to my blonde sister who is keeping far back, still demonstrating her protest by excluding herself as much as Esme will allow. "And also Emmett." My brother bound for Bella in a crushing hug, I feel thankful that Alice was so gentle.
"Nice to meet you Bella. You are all we have heard about for the past year and a half, god that boy wouldn't stop."
Kill me now
Why in gods name did I ever think this would be a sensible idea? I should have taken her back home.
"Bella this is Carlisle and Jasper." I indicated as they both leaned forward to shake her hand.
"It's nice to meet you all." She smiled and nodded a hello in Rose's direction obviously sensing her lack of involvement at her arrival.
BPOV
His family seem warm and inviting event though my knowing of their existence is a threat. Rose, the beautiful blonde stands alone and almost refuses to acknowledge my presence but I don't let it affect me as the rest are more than friendly.
The next hour passes along with them telling me about themselves, they don't sleep; don't eat, they have super hearing, not to mention they live forever. I learn Edward is over a hundred years old. He was changed by Carlisle on his death bed and has remained seventeen ever since, his body does not change except his eyes turn black when he needs to hunt.
The information is limitless and my mind struggles with the overload.
I splash my face in the bathroom, my long night wearing on me and I let out a yawn trying to make myself more awake.
Walking back down the stairs I take in the quiet as the seven faces looking up at me making me nervous. I must have interrupted there gossiping. I give a shy nervous smile as they begin to talk away again, Edward instantly at my side.
He smiles down at me; his amber orbs sparkle in the rooms light. "Love, they seem very taken by you." He whispers into my ear with a small snigger. I'm guessing at my unwillingness earlier with how I was dressed. But really could he not have warned me.
Alice is quick by my side, pushing all human necessities on to me, even though right now there not all that necessary.
"Bella." She calls holding out a glass of juice for me with a large smile at me finally taking something from her.
The glass is full and condensation escalates down the side making the glass slip out of my hand heading for the floor. I reach out to grab hold of it but Edward beats me to it catching it safely in his had without it smashing though its contents soak our tops.
I smile sorry at Edward as he just smiles back at my clumsiness. "Can I get you another one?" he asks with a laugh. "Only this time I'd rather not wear it." I hit out at his hand for his cheeky comment and nod only for Alice to be back at me with another full tumbler.
The sticky substance is annoying my arm as it managed to soak the bandage right through at my attempt to catch the glass. Rolling my sleeve up I pull off the tubular bandage and pull off the dressing to my cut arm feeling it wet too. The pull on the skin breaks the forming scab letting the smallest drop of blood oozes out of my arm.
A low deep growl rumbles next to me as I look up to meet beastly eyes on my arm. I feel myself freeze, unable to move as I look at Edward inhaling deeply. Time seems to pause as I look up to him as his view lingers on the blood.
I see it.
What he spoke about.
The beast
Before I know it Alice has me on the floor on the other side of the room trying to protect me from Edward as he snarls at me but only being kept back by his brothers and father. The three of them struggled to hold onto him as he roared and growled like a wild animal going after its prey.
I was the prey.
The realization of all the words he said, about the beast, the monster, the vampire in him slap me on the face as my Adonis is looking down at me, fighting to get at me.
To kill me
I feel my body tremble below Alice as I can't break my gaze from Edward. I wait for him to turn back into the boy in the woods, the boy that broke my fall with his arms, the boy that wrapped me around his frame as he landed me safely from the tree, the boy that told me I had his soul. The boy that promised he wouldn't let anything happen to me. Right now I began to believe him about the monster because right now, there was nothing else shining from his eyes except bloodlust.
The boy I loved was gone.
Like I said – things are just getting interesting, I'm still really sorry for how long it took to get this chapter up, It will get finished though – unless I get hit by a bus or something. Half finished FF's drives me insane.
So please I beg of you – review my lovely readers, review.
Also looking for a Beta for a twilight story - it will be All human and AU - if you think you may be interested let me know!
fd xx