A/N I'm sorry it took me so long to get this up! We're having work done on our apartment, so the Internet is all weird, and not to mention the ending of this chapter had me stumped for quite some while. In the end I just gave up on trying to write somethign half-way fitting at the end! ;) I really hope you enjoy it, and thanks for all the great encouragement!

Disclaimer: Unless Simon Baker is going to turn up at our apartment wearing nothing but jeans and a hard hat, I don't think I own The Mentalist...

She'd fallen asleep in his arms.

Obviously, she hadn't meant to, and would be mortified if anyone found out, but for now, he was content to believe that maybe his arms was where she was supposed to be.

"Please, Jane," she begged, her gun levelled at the space between her consultant and the man who had haunted him for years, "don't do this."

"I'm sorry, Lisbon," he said calmly, "but my decision was made a long time before I met you."

Red John stared back at Jane unflinchingly, nothing more than a shadow of the man who had once terrorized California. Lisbon felt tears build in her eyes.

"Jane, please. Put the knife down."

"He killed my wife and daughter, Lisbon. He took everything."

For a moment, he considered doing it there and then, making it quick, but that would defeat the point.

And then Lisbon spoke again, and his grip on the knife faltered.

"What about me?"

If she hadn't taken a life for him, he wouldn't have his to share with her.

If she hadn't turned up at the CBI, knowing he would be there, fire burning in her eyes, and if she hadn't told him that he was an idiot, he wouldn't have had the chance to tell her he was sorry.

In the end, Red John had killed himself. He lunged for the knife in Jane's hand, tore it from the consultant's grasp. Jane felt it slice through the fabric of his shirt, tear the skin at the top of his arm.

As blood started to stain the white material, Lisbon didn't even hesitate, pulling the trigger twice and giving them both the satisfaction of watching Red John fall to the floor.

If she hadn't shouted at him, hadn't accidentally revealed that her feelings ran far deeper than they were supposed to, he wouldn't know how she felt.

And if he didn't know how she felt, then he might have risked it all again, but maybe next time she wouldn't have been able to cry herself to sleep in his arms, because maybe next time he would be dead.

Lisbon handed her weapon to Cho, who granted her a rare smile, and placed it into an evidence bag. There would be no investigation. As far as the CBI was concerned, Lisbon had done them a favor, saving one of their consultants in the process.

Jane was still standing in the centre of the barn, staring at the bloodied ground long after the body had been removed. Lisbon touched him gently on the back.

"Hey," she said softly. Jane gave her a sideways glance.

"You didn't let me kill him."

"No. I let you be the better man."

"I didn't want to be the better man."

"You're thinking wrong again, Jane. I think you did want to be the better man, which is why you hesitated."

"I hesitated because of you!"

She stirred, and he suddenly pressed a kiss to her forehead. He knew that they were going somewhere (call it ambitious, but by God would he make it happen) and this time he wasn't going to let it slip by.

Lisbon frowned as he walked away from her.

"Where are you going?" she called.

Jane shook his head, and kept walking.

It was a vicious circle.

She shifted again, and Jane felt his arms subconsciously tighten around her.

"Jane?" Lisbon asked sleepily.

"I'm here," he replied, and then frowned. He was there, with a woman that wasn't his wife wrapped securely in his arms, and a peace in his heart that had been missing for years. Lisbon moved to sit up, her sleep-heavy eyes barely open.

All in all, Jane thought with an inner smile, she looked absolutely adorable, with her mussed hair and confused frown.

As the events of the day before came crashing back, Lisbon glanced up at him in concern.

"You didn't do anything stupid while I was asleep, did you?"

"No, my dear. You had me pinned to the sofa," he replied. Blushing, the small woman beside him moved away.

"Sorry."

"No need to apologize. You gave me time to think."

"About what?" Lisbon asked warily, sitting at the other end of the sofa and folding her legs beneath her.

"Justice."

At the matter-of-fact tone to his voice, she blinked, the sudden memory of why she was sitting on 'his' sofa in the middle of their office causing her heart to plummet to the pit of her stomach.

"Justice?"

"You should have let me killed Red John."

"But that's not justice, Jane!" she protested, "That's a misguided attempt at revenge."

"An eye for an eye," Jane replied calmly, "so tell me, which part of that isn't just and fair?"

"The part where it never stops?"

When he didn't reply, Lisbon moved towards him, stopping only when he had no choice but to look at her.

"I know," she began softly, "how much you wanted to kill him yourself. You wanted to get back at the man who took your family away. I get that, Jane, I really do..."

Lisbon sighed heavily, her hands itching to rest on his chest, yet glued firmly to her sides.

"You wanted to hurt the man who took away the most important thing in your life. To make him feel all the pain that you had to deal with, more so if it would help. But then you realize that you have a life to live, so you let all the anger just...build up."

Jane bent his head to look her in the eyes.

"Are we still talking about me?" he asked gently.

"Maybe."

There was silence for a moment, until Lisbon spoke again, her voice calm and full of strength.

"I can't speak for your wife and daughter, Patrick, and I would never pretend to, but I know that the people here who care about you wouldn't want you to rot away in a prison cell because you were too damn stubborn to ask for help."

Jane felt the edges of his eyes soften, the corner of his lips turning up in the faintest of smiles. Lisbon blinked, eyeing him cautiously.

"Why are you smiling like that?"

Her consultant shook his head.

"No reason."

"Jane..." she warned. He stood up suddenly, his soft smile breaking into a bright grin.

"I feel like tea. Would you like some?"

"Jane."

"Do we have any cake?"

Lisbon released a soft growl of frustration, knowing that he would never tell her what made him smile like that.

"You know what's not fair? You. You are not fair. You always take advantage of people."

"I do? I don't mean to."

"Who would have known?" she said sarcastically. As she went to move past him into the kitchen, Jane caught her arm, lightly tugging her back towards him.

"Would it make things more balanced if I told you that you can take advantage of me whenever you want?"

He was gone before the punch could land on his arm, chuckling as he leapt out of her range.

"JANE!"

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